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“AITA For Uninviting My Mom From My Wedding?”: Bride Doesn’t Want Her Disabled Sister At Her Wedding, Causing Massive Rift In Family
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“AITA For Uninviting My Mom From My Wedding?”: Bride Doesn’t Want Her Disabled Sister At Her Wedding, Causing Massive Rift In Family

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A wedding is typically a significant event not only for the happy couple but for their families as well. However, at the end of the day, it’s up to the soon-to-be-wed to decide if the family’s invited.

The redditor u/No-Magazine8763 recently told the AITA community about having to uninvite her mother from the celebration. Even though she admitted wanting her mom to be there, the latter didn’t agree with the OP’s decision not to invite her sister, which led to the parent not being allowed to participate herself. Scroll down to find the full story below.

Working out the guestlist for the wedding can be quite a headache

Image credits: boomeart (not the actual photo)

This person decided not to invite her sister to the wedding, which led to uninviting her mother as well

Image credits: NomadSoul1 (not the actual photo)

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Image credits: Zinkevych_D (not the actual photo)

Image credits: No-Magazine8763

Coming up with the guest list is not easy, but it should always include those closest to the happy couple

Working out the wedding guest list can be more challenging than it seems. Sometimes there are just too many people you want to have by your side on the big day; other times, you might be expected to invite those you actually don’t. Most of those who’ve planned a wedding have likely thought about whether they should invite their aunt they haven’t spoken to in eight years or that long-lost cousin they haven’t seen in ages.

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California-based wedding planner Chanda Daniels pointed out in Bride Magazine that “Creating a guest list is stressful because of all the obligations couples feel they have to meet, like inviting family members they aren’t really connected to, folks from work, their parents’ friends—the list continues”. A fellow planner from New York suggested that the happy couple should only invite people they love and consider close, and would be excited to see on the big day.

According to The Knot’s Real Weddings Study, 117 was the average number of people attending a wedding in 2022. Such a number indicates that wedding size has seemingly returned to the pre-covid times, as there is a noticeable increase from the year 2020, for instance. (The Knot pointed out that it went from 131 guests in 2019, to 66 in 2020, and 105 in 2021.)

Based on the 2022 survey, more than half of the happy couples—52%, to be exact—wanted to commemorate the day with a big celebration, inviting over a hundred guests. Roughly a third sent out invitations for somewhere between 51 and 100 people, while 14% of those surveyed had 50 or less names on their guest list.

Image credits: Emma Bauso (not the actual photo)

The size of the wedding varies depending on numerous factors, the price typically being one of them

The Knot also suggested that the number of invited guests seemingly varies depending on the generations the soon-to-be-wed represent. Based on the survey’s data, the younger the couple, the bigger the party: Gen X tends to invite roughly 90 guests, millennials aim for an average of 116, while Gen Z celebrates with 135 attendees.

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The number of people on the guestlist depends on numerous factors, and it’s likely safe to assume that the price is one of them. According to The Knot, back in 2021, the cost per person was as high as $266, arguably making some people think twice about inviting that long-lost cousin. CNBC pointed out that wedding-related expenses stand in the way of Gen Z and millennials’ financial goals—48% and 46% of them respectively believe so.

Even though money affects representatives of both of the aforementioned generations, millennials seem to be less thrilled about the prospect of marriage. According to Pew Research Center’s data, roughly 33% of them live with a spouse and a child compared to 40% of Gen X at a corresponding age.

No matter the generation, planning a wedding requires jumping through quite a few hoops. Statista revealed that in addition to the financial matters, guest list decisions and family politics or pleasing family members are among the top headaches of wedding planning as well. The OP seemingly had to deal with them as well, which led to a fight with her mother and the latter being uninvited from the wedding—a decision members of the AITA community had varying opinions about.

Image credits: Danik Prihodko (not the actual photo)

The OP provided more details in the comments

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The situation split the online community into two camps, quite a few people believed the OP was being a jerk

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Others sided with the soon-to-be-wed, saying they weren’t in the wrong here

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rdennis avatar
R Dennis
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My perfect day involves having the people I care about together. OP's perfect day is all attention and all eyes on me... good luck to her future spouse - maintain separate finances.

mdr_1 avatar
Potato
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is there even a spouse? Except for it being implied, I couldn't tell! "*my* day" "attention on *me*".

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jlkooiker avatar
lenka
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah... you almost had me up until you added the extra comments. Particularly when you talk about how beautiful she is, and then say "also that means she would have to be in all the photos". You are excluding your disable sister because you don't want her to be prettier and have any more attention than you. YTA

kaylee1953 avatar
Wendy Me
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It amazes me that people put so much emphasis on their ideal, perfect wedding. They spend thousands of dollars and hurt the people they profess to love just to get the perfect pictures and be the center of attention for one day. Some people really are shallow and narcissistic.

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rdennis avatar
R Dennis
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My perfect day involves having the people I care about together. OP's perfect day is all attention and all eyes on me... good luck to her future spouse - maintain separate finances.

mdr_1 avatar
Potato
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is there even a spouse? Except for it being implied, I couldn't tell! "*my* day" "attention on *me*".

Load More Replies...
jlkooiker avatar
lenka
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah... you almost had me up until you added the extra comments. Particularly when you talk about how beautiful she is, and then say "also that means she would have to be in all the photos". You are excluding your disable sister because you don't want her to be prettier and have any more attention than you. YTA

kaylee1953 avatar
Wendy Me
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It amazes me that people put so much emphasis on their ideal, perfect wedding. They spend thousands of dollars and hurt the people they profess to love just to get the perfect pictures and be the center of attention for one day. Some people really are shallow and narcissistic.

Load More Comments
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