“Two Of The Bridesmaids Stormed Off”: Woman Refuses To Participate In Wedding After Hearing Bride’s Delusional Expectations, Gets Called All Kinds Of Rude Names
You can never be sure if you know a person until the two of you have a disagreement.
Reddit user Current_Singer_6967 thought that being asked to stand beside a friend while she makes it official with the man she loves is the ultimate privilege.
However, after the Redditor agreed to take on the responsibility, the woman revealed a side of her that made her reconsider not only attending the wedding but their whole friendship.
This woman selected her bridesmaids based on their skills
Image credits: Sincerely Media (not the actual photo)
And assigned the group unpaid labor
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)
Credits: Current_Singer_6967
It is not unreasonable for a bride to expect her bridesmaids to contribute financially
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
The role of a bridesmaid is to support and assist the bride prior to, during, and just after the wedding. The actual duties that one is expected to perform are varied depending on how much help the bride needs and how big the wedding actually is.
Jane Yu, who is the co-founder of the wedding planning and DJ company Veils & Vinyls, thinks that a bridesmaid “doesn’t have to be at their beck and call, but it’s nice for the bride to know that their bridesmaids are there for them as their closest friends and best supporters.”
Yu highlights that bridesmaids should take the time to understand how they are to contribute, financially and otherwise, and have honest conversations about those responsibilities from day one.
Again, the amount of money that a bridesmaid will be required to spend is going to differ depending on the bride and her idea of a reasonable budget, but while some brides pay for their bridesmaids’ outfits, hair, and make-up, demanding 800 pounds (which equates to about 950 dollars) when you are already making everyone work is just bonkers.
And engaged couples go through a lot when planning their wedding
Image credits: _IB_ (not the actual photo)
What pushes people to these extremes? Wedding coordinator Elisabeth Kramer believes it’s all the stress. “One of the most problematic ironies about weddings is that nobody thinks they’re work,” she wrote. “Because a wedding is pretty and fun and about love, we seem to forget that it is also often a multi-thousand dollar affair with a team of ten to twelve paid professionals and more than 100 guests. It’s not just a wedding. It’s an event.”
“Planning a wedding is an (unpaid) part-time job and yet we’re surprised when the people planning these things get stressed,” Kramer added.
According to her, a woman who plans her wedding is not destined to become a “bridezilla.”
“There’s nothing about her—or her mom or her sister or anyone who happens to identify as female and also happens to be involved in a wedding—that makes her inherently more likely to ‘freak out,’ ‘act crazy,’ or ‘be hysterical,'” Kramer explained. “Rather, a ‘bridezilla’ is the very natural, very rational response to the very unnatural, very irrational amount of time and effort that it takes to plan a modern wedding.”
Still, you can’t take your friends for granted.
But people think this woman went way too far
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Only thing delusional here is thinking there's a question. Get insulted, get drama, get unpaid work, get a bill and get paperwork? Sure, makes sense.
Half the AITA's are strange as hell. My friend screamed at me because I wouldn't give them money, AITA? Like, you felt conflicted and needed a second opinion?
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WTF?! "It is not unreasonable for a bride to expect her bridesmaids to contribute financially." Seriously? It is entirely unreasonable for a bride to EXPECT anything of the sort. OK to ask, maybe - but not expect or demand. Over the years I've helped out with everything from making bridesmaids dresses to flowers for the ceremony to catering the after party (at cost of materials). Even, a few times , when I was not in the wedding because I could not afford the dress selected. But these things were asked of a friend, not the price I should pay for being "honoured"
That advice came from someone who's company thrives by over-expensive weddings - what a surprise.
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What the hell is going on with some of these stories? Pretty soon we're going to get something like "A complete stranger punched me in the face for no reason and I cried a bit. AITA?"
I get what you’re saying and I mostly agree - but then again… when one’s been in such a situation, things can get a bit muddled. Human emotions are messy and pretty damned stupid, they can’t always keep up with logic. They’re still pretty much stuck on the level of “tiger bad, be terrified, run - food good, be happy, eat”. I’ve had people asking me pretty much exactly what you just suggested, in real life. Things get weird when emotions are involved sometimes and wires can cross in the strangest way. But yeah, I get your point.
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Only thing delusional here is thinking there's a question. Get insulted, get drama, get unpaid work, get a bill and get paperwork? Sure, makes sense.
Half the AITA's are strange as hell. My friend screamed at me because I wouldn't give them money, AITA? Like, you felt conflicted and needed a second opinion?
Load More Replies... WTF?! "It is not unreasonable for a bride to expect her bridesmaids to contribute financially." Seriously? It is entirely unreasonable for a bride to EXPECT anything of the sort. OK to ask, maybe - but not expect or demand. Over the years I've helped out with everything from making bridesmaids dresses to flowers for the ceremony to catering the after party (at cost of materials). Even, a few times , when I was not in the wedding because I could not afford the dress selected. But these things were asked of a friend, not the price I should pay for being "honoured"
That advice came from someone who's company thrives by over-expensive weddings - what a surprise.
Load More Replies... What the hell is going on with some of these stories? Pretty soon we're going to get something like "A complete stranger punched me in the face for no reason and I cried a bit. AITA?"
I get what you’re saying and I mostly agree - but then again… when one’s been in such a situation, things can get a bit muddled. Human emotions are messy and pretty damned stupid, they can’t always keep up with logic. They’re still pretty much stuck on the level of “tiger bad, be terrified, run - food good, be happy, eat”. I’ve had people asking me pretty much exactly what you just suggested, in real life. Things get weird when emotions are involved sometimes and wires can cross in the strangest way. But yeah, I get your point.
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