They critique your input, they delegate their work, and they cut you off in meetings — they’re the colleague who acts like your boss, even though the two of you are on the same rung of the company’s hierarchy.
While many of us go through countless scenarios in our heads of how to get back at them, a few days ago, Redditor Significant-Toe3680 made a post on the subreddit ‘Petty Revenge‘ detailing how they actually pulled off one. All it took was a bit of quick thinking and timing.
Bossy colleagues make everyday life at the office unnecessarily hard
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
So this employee decided to get back at his annoying coworker
Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Significant-Toe3680
“Bossy” workers can be a detriment to the company
Image credits: Antoni Shkraba (not the actual photo)
According to research by Georgetown University professor Christine Porath as well as Alexandra Gerbasi and Andrew Parker from the French graduate business school Grenoble École de Management, just one negative interaction at work can have four to seven times the (reverse) influence of a positive one. And bossy workers can cause a lot of those negative interactions.
Selena Rezvani, an internationally known leadership speaker, says there are a few reasons why some employees might start acting this way.
“They may overestimate their abilities or simply believe they know more than you do,” she tells Bored Panda. “It could be because they have the experience or insight to point out real errors or concerns, but it comes across poorly, or it could just be bluster which covers up their deeper-seated insecurities.”
Rezvani, whose newest book ‘Quick Confidence: Be Authentic, Boost Connections, and Make Bold Bets on Yourself‘ became an instant Wall Street Journal bestseller, says that in their drive to boost their own status, dominators usually also knock you down.
“They likely interrupt you, minimize your role, and bellow orders. These negative interactions are more than an annoyance — they color our perceptions of work more than we think.”
Dealing with pushy colleagues is difficult and time-consuming
Image credits: Elisa Ventur (not the actual photo)
Controlling, bossy people are annoying and frustrating, but according to executive leadership coach Lolly Daskal, the right mindset and approach can help you mitigate their impact on you. For that, Daskal recommends the following:
Stay calm.
It can be frustrating and upsetting to be told what to do or have someone take over for you, but it’s important that you stay in control of your temper. Bossy people thrive on provoking a strong reaction that allows them to be a victim: “I was only trying to help, and they came after me like I’d done something wrong!”
Be direct.
To manage your bossy colleague, you’re going to have to be assertive. Maintain a calm, professional tone, and keep your interactions short and succinct. Avoid making a scene and make sure you stay calm and respectful. You might want to explain how their behavior is affecting you, but avoid blaming them, and stick to “I” statements.
Don’t take it personally.
Remember that your coworker’s behavior is not about you, and don’t let their words or behavior affect you personally. It’s all about them wanting to feel more important and in control–you’re just the person who happens to be there.
Ignore them.
In some situations–especially if the bad behavior persists despite your best efforts–it may be best to try and ignore it. If you can brush off your coworker’s bad behavior and just ignore them, you may derail their strategy. And if it won’t bring the desired results, at least you’ll save your own peace of mind.
Set healthy boundaries.
Be consistent in asserting your own boundaries and learn to set and enforce your boundaries so people know not to cross them.
Seek additional support.
Enlist the help of your supervisor or the HR manager if your colleague’s behavior persists and interferes with your work.
Lead by example.
Faced with a bossy, domineering coworker–or any difficult person in any area of your life–become the change you wish to see, but model the way you would want to be treated; speak politely and act with respect.
But as we can see from the Reddit story, sometimes an unorthodox approach can work as well!
As their story went viral, the original poster (OP) joined the discussion in the comments
Yes, she is positioning herself as your supervisor. In many companies, you have to act as a supervisor to get considered for a promotion to one. She’s looking after her interests, you need to look after yours.
Not a great story. Very low stakes, no pay-off. Coworker slightly annoying? Send her spam calls. Not the best content.
I worked in a team once where there was a guy who'd been there a while and not really progressed. He wasn't a bad worker, but he was no ball of fire either - an uninspired dullard. He sort of drifted into being "Admin Man". Anyhow, there was a bit of a re-org, and he took it upon himself to redo the team org chart. He'd put himself in a little box labelled *Lead* Senior Analyst Programmer, above the other Seniors. Boy, did he get the p**s ripped out of him.
Yes, she is positioning herself as your supervisor. In many companies, you have to act as a supervisor to get considered for a promotion to one. She’s looking after her interests, you need to look after yours.
Not a great story. Very low stakes, no pay-off. Coworker slightly annoying? Send her spam calls. Not the best content.
I worked in a team once where there was a guy who'd been there a while and not really progressed. He wasn't a bad worker, but he was no ball of fire either - an uninspired dullard. He sort of drifted into being "Admin Man". Anyhow, there was a bit of a re-org, and he took it upon himself to redo the team org chart. He'd put himself in a little box labelled *Lead* Senior Analyst Programmer, above the other Seniors. Boy, did he get the p**s ripped out of him.
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