If you’re a guy and you have no idea how the female body works, it’s strongly—strongly as in it can’t be overstated—recommended to hit the books on the topic. Otherwise, you may just end up making an absolute fool of yourself sooner or later.

To illustrate this, there’s a Reddit story of malicious compliance where one such clueless store clerk decided to go full on confrontational on a woman who he thought was hiding something underneath her clothing, but it was just a hygiene pad doing its thing.

Acting like a tough store clerk in public might improve security, but it might also make a fool of them

Image credits: halfpoint

How? By mistakenly accusing a woman of stealing, when in reality that bulge right there is anything but stolen goods

Image source: PokiiDokiLokii

Image credits: FabrikaPhoto

The woman decided to maliciously comply with the ridiculous store clerk’s demand, leading to a bloody payout of a soaked hygiene pad

The story goes that Redditor u/PokiiDokiLokii was chilling with her grandma, listening to a podcast when the topic of periods came up. One association led to another and the grandma shared what OP referred to as a “gem” of a story.

Some time ago, grandma was vacationing in the Dominican Republic. This coincided with that time of the month, so certain precautions were in order. However, as she was shopping, those same precautions created an image of her that the store clerk misinterpreted oh so horribly wrong. He assumed the bulge in this one particular area was her trying to smuggle something out of the store.

So, in good aggressive store clerk fashion, he confronted the woman. Remember that this was quite a long time ago, so common decency and manners were probably non-existent, and mean flow prevention used to also be much less subtle than it is now.

The best part is that grandma decided to be maliciously (actually savagely) compliant with showing what she’s hiding down there. Imagine a scene where you’re handed a wad of cash with very expressive hand slapping as the cash is transferred from one hand to the other—yep, replace it with a women’s hygiene pad. Need we elaborate?

Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)

Folks online thought grandma was an absolute legend for casually putting the clerk back in his place

The general consensus was that grandma pulled a savage move and everyone was there to support her in it. Folks were sending their respect to her, as many women would’ve definitely reacted differently. Probably would’ve shrieked at the idiocy of it all.

Others shared stories of how their periods were mistaken for things people shouldn’t mistake things for. Like a tampon being in its individual wrapper and the brother mistaking it for candy. Or airport security misunderstanding the concept of a tampon dispenser. Because men.

Or, a bit of a change in products—one woman was catcalled at a bar with a suggestion to let a lecherous mothershutyourmouth lay his hands on some of her frontal assets. She told him to knock himself out and left two large silicone bra inserts at the bar and walked off with her drinks.

4,200 upvotes later, the post started making rounds on Reddit, going viral in the process.

Image credits: Fikri Rasyid (not the actual photo)

While the situation was dealt with epically, it should’ve been a whole different deal in reality, given proper security protocol

How the store clerk was supposed to handle the situation (despite the decade this was in) was to, first, establish a probable cause for shoplifting. The store clerk did that, but didn’t really see it happen as much as he assumed it happened. And you might say it’s as fair as seeing an unorthodox bulge underneath someone’s sweater is sus, but this wasn’t underneath a sweater.

To avoid drama and chaos, tail the shoplifter until they are about to leave. It’s beneficial to have several people at the exit to outnumber the shoplifter and to make sure they don’t get away. But before anything happens, introduce yourself to the shoplifter and let them know that you know what they stole. So, the jig is up.

Then, it’s time to escort them back to the store, ideally into the security’s hub, where you can verify what (and if) has been stolen. Because privacy and respect.

So, what are your thoughts on any of this? Be sure to share your takes and stories on anything you’ve read here today in the comment section below!

Image credits: FabrikaPhoto (not the actual photo)

It’s important to note that this happened a while ago, back when both hygiene products and the grandma were different

The story garnered 4.2K upvotes with folks praising what a legend the grandma was

Others shared their own stories of periods, bras and other things that guys don’t get

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!

Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!