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“He Is A Selfish Man”: Hubby Gets Mad About Missing Cinema Outing With Wife And Stepkids On Xmas Eve
Man wearing Santa hat working at computer during holiday season in festive office setting.

“He Is A Selfish Man”: Hubby Gets Mad About Missing Cinema Outing With Wife And Stepkids On Xmas Eve

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As the year comes to a close, most people want to relax and spend the holidays with their loved ones, but not everyone gets lucky enough to take the time off. This can lead to certain folks feeling left out and like they are missing out on family time. 

This is what happened when a man realized that his wife and stepkids were planning to go watch a movie on Christmas Eve without him, since he was working. Even though his partner didn’t see it as a big deal, he felt it was quite mean, and that led to a conflict between them.

More info: Mumsnet

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    Man wearing Santa hat working at computer in decorated office during holiday season, while woman plans outing with husband work

    Image credits: Maxime / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    The poster explained that since her husband was working till late on Christmas Eve, she decided to take her kids and go for a movie without him

    Woman planning outing with husband while both manage work schedules on Christmas Eve.

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    Alt text: Woman planning outing with husband while considering kids' favorite movie for family time.

    Woman planning outing while husband works, looking thoughtful and organizing family activities at home.

    Text reads I thought there is no point us all missing out just because he has to work, about woman planning outing while husband works.

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    Text on screen describing a woman planning an outing with her husband after work, considering his rigid routine.

    Text message from a woman planning an outing and discussing Christmas Eve plans with her husband and teens.

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    Audience watching a movie in a dark theater while a woman plans outing and husband handles work details.

    Image credits: Krists LuhaersFreepik / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    Unfortunately, the man felt hurt by her plan since it was a family outing, so she asked him if they were even allowed to do anything when he wasn’t around

    Text image showing a question about being unreasonable to plan an outing without husband at work.

    Woman planning an outing at home while her husband is busy working at a desk in a modern living space.

    Woman planning an outing while husband works, focusing on balancing family time and individual responsibilities at home

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    Woman planning an outing while her husband is at work, discussing family trip and making arrangements.

    Woman planning outing while husband is at work, organizing activities and managing family schedule indoors.

    Two women smiling and taking a selfie near a decorated Christmas tree, planning outing while husband is at work.

    Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Since the woman hadn’t booked tickets for the film yet, she talked to her husband, and they agreed to take the kids out on Boxing Day instead

    Woman planning outing with husband who works shifts, feeling he misses out due to his work schedule.

    Woman planning outing while husband is busy working, showing thoughtful preparation and time management.

    Woman planning an outing while husband works, discussing schedules and coordinating time together at home.

    Woman planning outing with husband at work, thinking about a surprise Christmas Eve trip to see Moana with the kids.

    Woman planning outing while considering husband’s work schedule to book tickets for Boxing Day trip together.

    Woman planning outing while husband works, sitting at a table with a notebook and phone, organizing plans efficiently.

    Image credits: MerryLiftMass

    The woman also realized that since her husband was always so busy with work, he tended to miss out on a lot of family outings, which is probably why he felt bad

    Since the OP was getting done with work early on Christmas Eve, she decided to take her children out for their favorite movie and get some much-needed family time. She wanted them all to go to the afternoon show since the evening one was too late, which is why she didn’t ask her husband to join, since he’d be working.

    Although these small trips can be quite fun with one or two family members, experts state that it’s also important for everyone to be involved in at least some outings. When all loved ones are brought together for family trips, it can be a wonderful bonding experience and help them create many beautiful memories.

    It’s possible that the dad felt like he was missing out on such moments because when he heard about the movie plan, he threw a fit. The OP couldn’t understand why he was making such a big deal of the issue, and she knew that since he was so rigid with his schedule, he wouldn’t like the change in his routine.

    According to psychologists, when dealing with a person who insists on making things difficult or refuses to compromise, it’s important first to try to understand their point of view. Knowing why they are so stuck in their beliefs might make it easier to deal with their rigidity and set boundaries with them in the future.

    Man working at computer looking stressed while woman plans outing in the background of home office setting

    Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    The poster initially didn’t realize how hurt her husband was about being excluded from the movie plan, and so when he shared his feelings, she was shocked about how much it meant to him. Since he was the children’s stepdad, he must have also wanted to bond with them and spend much-needed family time together.

    Many blended family experts state that stepparents might feel isolated and insecure about the connection they have with their stepkids. That’s why biological parents must bridge the gap and make them feel welcome by including them as often as possible. This is also a good way for children to start feeling comfortable around their stepparent and eventually consider them a part of the family.

    When the OP finally understood her partner’s perspective, she decided to come to a compromise with him. Since he didn’t want to be left out of the movie plans, they decided to go watch the film on Boxing Day instead. She also realized that her kids would not mind when they went, so it was an easy decision to make.

    Many people criticized her husband for trying to control when she and the kids went out, but she clarified that he was generally quite an understanding person. It’s possible that he just let his insecurity get the best of him this time.  

    What do you think about this situation, and do you feel the woman did the right thing by changing her plans to fit her husband’s schedule? Let us know your honest thoughts in the comments below.

    People also seemed to understand why the husband wanted to be involved in the outing, and they were glad that the poster found a compromise

    Woman planning an outing while her husband is at work, organizing family time carefully and thoughtfully.

    Woman planning outing while husband works, coordinating family time and trips to fit work schedules.

    Woman planning an outing while her husband is busy working on a laptop at home in a cozy setting.

    Woman planning outing while husband works, discussing family plans and balancing work commitments.

    Woman planning outing while husband is at work, managing time and activities with kids independently at home.

    Woman planning an outing while her husband works at a desk, coordinating family time and schedules.

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    Beverly Noronha

    Beverly Noronha

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    Beverly Noronha

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    You can call me Bev! I'm a world-class reader, a quirky writer, and a gardener who paints. If you’re looking for information about tattoos, Bulbasaur, and books, then I'm the NPC you must approach.

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    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Hi! Here at Panda's I'm responsible for Photo Editing and all of the things surrounding it. I love finding great, moody or even dramatic photos to fit the story. Besides that, I'm a proud owner of 3 cats with the silliest names and a bazillion plants<3You can find me at a makeup counter with headphones swatching all of the sparkly eyeshadows

    What do you think ?
    Lukas (he/him, it/its)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Hubby Rigid About Time Throws Tantrum About Wife Going With Kids To Cinema On Christmas Eve" Throws a tantrum? Reading this, it seems he merely expressed that he would be sad to miss out on the trip. It seemed like healthy communication from his side, and they found out a time that worked for all of them. Maybe it's because he's described as autistic that I have such an issue with the word "tantrum" being used here. Why is an autistic adult being described as "having a tantrum" for expressing he'd be sad to miss out on a family outing, especially when there are so few chances to have them?

    Lukas (he/him, it/its)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was updated to "“He Is A Selfish Man”: Hubby Gets Mad About Missing Cinema Outing With Wife And Stepkids On Xmas Eve" Who called him selfish? Not the wife, not any of the replies BP used. Where does it say he got mad? He was hurt and felt left out- all reasonable human emotions. It makes sense to want to be included when your family goes on an outing when you're stuck working on Christmas Eve.

    Load More Replies...
    Lukas (he/him, it/its)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Hubby Rigid About Time Throws Tantrum About Wife Going With Kids To Cinema On Christmas Eve" Throws a tantrum? Reading this, it seems he merely expressed that he would be sad to miss out on the trip. It seemed like healthy communication from his side, and they found out a time that worked for all of them. Maybe it's because he's described as autistic that I have such an issue with the word "tantrum" being used here. Why is an autistic adult being described as "having a tantrum" for expressing he'd be sad to miss out on a family outing, especially when there are so few chances to have them?

    Lukas (he/him, it/its)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was updated to "“He Is A Selfish Man”: Hubby Gets Mad About Missing Cinema Outing With Wife And Stepkids On Xmas Eve" Who called him selfish? Not the wife, not any of the replies BP used. Where does it say he got mad? He was hurt and felt left out- all reasonable human emotions. It makes sense to want to be included when your family goes on an outing when you're stuck working on Christmas Eve.

    Load More Replies...
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