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Mom-Of-Six Explains Why “Men Cause 100% Of Unplanned Pregnancies” And Many Agree
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Social Issues4 years ago

Mom-Of-Six Explains Why “Men Cause 100% Of Unplanned Pregnancies” And Many Agree

An American mother of six has decided to share her opinion on a sensitive subject, and she’s not willing to compromise. Author Gabrielle Stanley Blair, 44, from Oakland, California, turned to Twitter to argue that unplanned pregnancy is always the man’s fault, no matter what the circumstances and her thread went viral.

“I’ve been working out the thoughts on unprotected sex and birth control I presented in the article over the last year,” Gabrielle told Bored Panda. “I actually wrote the thread about three months ago, and then hesitated to make it public — Twitter can be a harsh place, and I worried my family would be attacked.” Watching the Kavanaugh hearings, however, got her to hit publish.

Also, Blair is a Mormon, and she thinks that when it comes to abortion, her religious beliefs are on her side, too. “The Mormon church has guidelines that include abortion as an option for rape, the health of the mother, etc., and those exceptions can’t happen if abortion clinics are illegal,” she added. “My interpretation of the Mormon church’s take is that it is pro-legal abortion and contraception. Other church members may interpret things in favor of anti-abortion.

Generating nearly 185,000 likes and over 72,000 retweets, Gabrielle’s tweet reignited the ever-lasting debate and if you want to join it, tell us your thoughts in the comments.

More info: Twitter

Author Gabrielle Blair from California turned to Twitter to argue that unplanned pregnancies are always the man’s fault

And her unapologetic thread has generated nearly 185,000 likes and over 72,000 retweets

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stellermatt
Community Member
4 years ago

me and my wife have 2 kids, they were planned, they are beautiful, but the births were not great. but all is ok now. thankfully. now we don't want any more kids, so instead of her having to go through any more trauma (operations etc) I decided I couldn't let her go through anything as she'd been through enough, so I had 'the snip'. Best thing ever for us, no worries, no stress, just good ol' fashioned fun! It's not the answer for everyone, but it worked for us.

Monika Soffronow
Community Member
4 years ago

Stellermatt, your wife and your children are enjoying a husband/father who actually does what the stereotype of a husband/father does: you shoulder responsibility. You are not alone, but I would be enormously pleased to see more of your kind to come forward and openly talk about their life choices on topics such as this one, or discussions between men about how thoroughly unacceptable it is to beat your wife/partner/girlfriend, etc. Other men and boys need good and real role models. Thank you for sharing.

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Kiahna
Community Member
4 years ago

I don't even know what to say. That whole post just explained everything. When a teenage girl gets pregnant, everybody blames her. But nobody bats an eye at the guy who got her pregnant.

Dian Ella Lillie
Community Member
4 years ago

Is it just me or are people wondering what role a woman apparently has in a sexual relationship as understood by Ms Blair? It seems to me that her approach removes agency from women as participating equal partners in sexual encounters and decisions.

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Alusair Alustriel
Community Member
4 years ago

I stopped reading at "Men can't get women pregnant without an orgasm". I don't know where that lady took biologi lessons, but I was taught (and then witnessed it) that before orgasms men can produce droplets of substance that might contain spermatozoids. That also breaks apart the theory of pull-outs being effective. Heck, not even using pills & condoms is 100% sure. The only way NOT to get pregnant is not to have sex. Period. Oh two things more: woman can say NO (I refer to normal situations, not rape) and that thread was not a twitter one. Wall of text on twitter... Meh.

Dr. Cheri Hayes
Community Member
4 years ago (edited)

Also, she was not accurate in her statement that women can get pregnant only about 2 days a month. A woman can realistically get pregnant about 6 days a month. Sperm can live approximately 48-72 hours after ejaculation inside a woman's body, which means that 2 - 3 days before and 2 - 3 days after ovulation, there is a possibility of pregnancy. And to validate Alusair's post, the pre-ejaculate does have some sperm in it. One of the biological processes they teach us in medical school, first year.

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Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
4 years ago

Well, there is a simple solution... just don't be with a man who refuses to put on condom, because he "hates the feeling". He does not respect you, he puts you in danger and himself first, simple as that. That would just end this debate. I can't say that men are 100% guilty of unwanted pregnancies as long as there are so many many (many) women who would just tolerate men who find condoms "inconvenient". And it's not just pregnancy, it's disease protection too. Just, respect yourself and when such men are left alone for too long they will start to get it (hopefully). Also they are not in majority, you will find someone else.

rabbitsrabbit
Community Member
4 years ago

Just like to point out that the posts said some men do 'stealthing'. By the time the woman realises that he isnt wearing a condom anymore, it was too late.

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Agnes Jekyll
Community Member
4 years ago

Look. She is trying to point out the inanity that is the agenda of certain men in society that believe women should not have easy access to birth control by demonstrating men's responsibility. Let's remember too that she is American, writing about the situation there, and she is the mother of 6 who clearly loves her husband but is tired of women being the focus on birth control when clearly, it should be men's concern too.

Random Panda
Community Member
4 years ago

Finally, someone who gets it.

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Moises Hernandez Jr
Community Member
4 years ago

Give me a break. Bored Panda should stick to funny pictures or amazing photographs. This rant is beyond ridiculous. I am married and father of two. I had a vasectomy a month after my second child was born so that my wife would not have to be on birth control for the next twenty five years. Responsibility in an individual acts first. Still women can say no to a man, women can choose their partner and sexual activities as you say to remain celibate during those 24 annual days you mentioned. Women have a right to choose correct, then make the right choices. If my teenage daughter gets pregnant it won't be simply because a boy could not keep it in his pant (I would make sure he paid for his share of poor decisions) but it would ultimately be because she gave into her own sexual impulses and willingly participant. Every one is responsible for taking responsibilities for heir actions

Monika Soffronow
Community Member
4 years ago

You did the right thing. You shouldered responsibility. Great. You wrote about it here, and thus became a sound role model for boys and men reading this. Well done! - - - There is no need for you to become defensive, you have already made sure you will not cause any unwanted pregnancies. You are in fact showing the very same commendable male behaviour she is hoping for. - - - But she is still right on target. No woman gets pregnant without male sperm, and since you seem like a thoroughly decent guy your own decency is probably what gets in your way to understanding how way too many men treat women.

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Random Panda
Community Member
4 years ago

There are a few flaws in her argument. For one birth control is not 100% effective, not even the pill and for another the fertile window for women is longer than 2 days, since sperm can live up to 5 days in the vagina. I do think she is on point that more needs to be done to hold men responsible for unplanned pregnancies.

Tessa Milks
Community Member
4 years ago

While sperm lives up to 5 days in the fallopian tubes (not the vagina) the egg is only goof for up to 48 hours.

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Josie Jones
Community Member
4 years ago

Good lord I stopped half ways and scrolled and thought who da fuck has the time to read this shit from a Mormon no less who thinks god is a magician from outer space? Eh I'll stick to my life's work in science and say you know how pregnancy work just look after yourself. So much of what she wrote is total nonsense but I don't have the energy to even start. The stuff she said about men pill is not strictly true. Several men on the medical trial committed suicide which shuts down any trial not just things for men. But what do I know I only work in pharmaceuticals and spent 9 years studying it?! Dip shit!

Jennifer Hunter
Community Member
4 years ago

Mormons don't believe that God is a magician from outer space; that's Scientology. And based on what I read, she isn't broaching the subject from a Mormon perspective, but rather sharing an extreme viewpoint as a way to draw attention to the fact that reproductive laws are geared toward the systematic principles of policing and controlling women, their bodies, and their right to make choices for themselves. Most Mormons (or any religion, really) would agree with reversing Roe-v-Wade, restricting birth control, etc; I think her mentioning that she's a Mormon is more for effect; basically stating "yea I'm Mormon but even *I* am more socially liberal than these other a-holes trying to take away our reproductive rights." While I agree that a lot of the "facts" she uses are nonsense, I get the overall point she's trying to make. Too bad some people are too short sighted to see past her religion and resort to name calling instead.

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
4 years ago

For all those insisting the Male Pill was "worse", etc.? Use of the female pill can lead to *CANCER* risks. I'd say that's a pretty bad side effect (and infertility from cancer treatment, btw, is a real thing)... For thsoe thinking "unless a woman was raped"... Um, I'm a "pill baby". My parents thought I wasn't going to happen. I did anyway! (And then my mom said, "condom or vasectomy" and my dad actually went vasectomy lest he have to use a *gasp* condom). TMI? How many *MEN* die in childbirth or of pregnancy-related complications? How many MEN lose jobs b/c they got a woman pregnant and bosses decided it just wasn't worth that family-leave impaired-employee thing? Oh, and for the record? Women are much more likely to acquire an STD from a male than other way around after *one* sexual encounter. Look it up. BTW, it only takes ONE person to make a baby --- once the sperm is in, the man's *done*. The woman? Has to risk permanent damage to her own health to gestate a fetus to term.

Whatevers not taken
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Well you didn't go to med school. I DID. Or you would know that the female pill does NOT cause Cancer ever those that are a risk for it. Do your research before you comment something stupid again.

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Nia Loves Art
Community Member
4 years ago

Except that condoms sometimes break. Also a woman can refuse to have sex without a condom. Both partners are equally responsible for any conception that occurs during consensual sex without birth control sabotage.

Lucinda Overhoussen
Community Member
4 years ago

Women should not ever have to be in a position where they ask their partner to put a condom on and she has to insist or "refuse to have sex" because her partner refuses to wear on. The fact that women have to insist or refuse is what's wrong. The fact that another woman thinks that women should have to insist is what's wrong.

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Daria B
Community Member
4 years ago (edited)

*Disclaimer: read this comment until the end* There's a lot of trully good men out there. Men who actually empathize enough to understand the female mind (because we're all humans), even our bodies (ex.: gynecologists). Men who are aware of what they can do/cause, and who will therefore take ALL the precautions, and who are ready, just in case, to take full responsibility if something goes wrong. I'm almost sure those men will agree with this woman's statement and that all those irresponsible assholes should be lectured (or even punished, as I actually heard from men). Edit: okay, maybe not with this woman's statement, but definitely about the part about assholes...

Pavlina G
Community Member
4 years ago

TLDR

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Parmeisan
Community Member
4 years ago

I'm not sure how I feel about this thread. On the one hand, the 100% blame is patently untrue. The argument only makes sense in cases where the woman asked the man to wear a condom or pull out, and he didn't. In real life, condoms break, pulling out fails, and lack of education is rampant. Also, sometimes women prefer no condom, perhaps hoping their pill will work, and perhaps it doesn't. There are many ways that unwanted pregnancy can happen, and not all of them are entirely the man's fault. On the other hand, this thread has a tonne of interesting arguments and probably nobody would read it all if it lacked the hyperbole.

Karen Klinck
Community Member
4 years ago

Ah, you said the word, the word the Patriarchy of America hates with a passion: education. Yes, if we had the proper education about sex in schools we would have far fewer unwanted pregnancies and far fewer assholes denying their side of the responsibility for making babies. But the fact remains that most boys are brought up to believe whatever they want, they can have, be it that nifty bike or unprotected sex--and anything that results, be it a car accident from cutting in front of someone or a baby, is not their fault. Individual parents correct this, but as a whole,sorry, that's America.

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Kenny Kulbiski
Community Member
4 years ago

This is a non winnable debate (thanks, Panda) but I'd like to point out that medical sites say women can get pregnant 6 days a month not 2.

Kristina Seditio
Community Member
4 years ago

It's because sperm can live up to 5 days inside the woman, and ovulation occurs over 2-3 days, you only ovulate once per menstruation. Usually every 28 days. A woman does not even need to be having sex, for the sperm to remain alive and impregnate her days later.

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Hans
Community Member
4 years ago

Wow... I have not read such a culmination of generalising hatred in a while. This woman disqualifies herself by speaking of "all" man, besides having a fundamentally crooked understanding of biology, law, and ethics, to name just a few. Moreover, what she proposes applies only to the US. Did we not just have this series on argumentative fallacies? She gives examples for nost of them. However, the most important thing is: I comr here to read nice stories, to enjoy art, and to see puppies. Who else?

Karen Klinck
Community Member
4 years ago

Then limit yourself to those, and eschew intelligent conversation.

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Joseph Brzezinski
Community Member
4 years ago

Wow, could this lady played the victim card any harder...?? She seems to forget one very important idea, consent. Here's where women share the blame, a women can easily say NO, I will NOT have sex without a condom. NO condom, NO sex, NO unwanted pregnancy (not counting the rare times condoms don't work, something like 3 or 4%)

Birdgirl45
Community Member
4 years ago

Yea well then there's times when women say no but men who are pigs decide to advance on them and then they're never the same, and sometimes there's a pregnancy

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Troux
Community Member
4 years ago

She immediately lost credibility with that mathematical "theory". Women can only initiate a pregnancy 2 times a month, but men can initiate a pregnancy 1000+ times a year? Give me a break, this is not a representation of reality. Men are certainly more capable of controlling the pregnancy (pullout, condom control) and have less at stake in the circumstance, but to say that they are 100% responsible just sounds like spiteful accusation.

Lara L.
Community Member
4 years ago

Pullout is not safe.

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Gerry Higgins
Community Member
4 years ago

Men are 100% responsible for their part in the unwanted pregnancy. News flash, women are 100% responsible for their role as well.

MADDY BERGREN
Community Member
3 years ago

yess but their parts are not equal men 80 women 20

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Maurício Seabra
Community Member
4 years ago

I had a vasectomy and I'm glad I did. But I still think pregnancy takes two. A girl can keep a condom too, and she can deny having sex without it.

MADDY BERGREN
Community Member
3 years ago

her point wasn't that before sex he would take off the condom its that during sex he would take it off without her consent or knowledge

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Pamela24
Community Member
4 years ago

Look, I mostly agree with her. She pointed out things I didn't really want to realize because now it makes me even madder than before. BUT. What is it with people thinking that writing a university thesis worth an article in a twitter thread is a good idea? Gosh... (I know, I know...focusing on the important things in this, am I...)