Woman Invades Personal Space On A Plane, Flier Comes Up With A Genius Plan To Get Back At Her
Interview With Expert
It’s common knowledge that personal space should be respected, especially on a plane where room for maneuver seems to get smaller and smaller every time you travel. If you ask any flyer, they would probably agree that there should be a booklet in the compartment of every seat listing the dos and don’ts of neighboring with others on an aircraft.
One of them would definitely be this person, who recently sat next to a woman who felt entitled to control window shade all the way from her aisle seat. However, they weren’t going to let such behavior slide and came up with a three-act plan on how to get back at her.
Scroll down to find the full story and a conversation with etiquette educator and founding manager of Etiquette for the Business of Life, Candace Smith, who kindly agreed to give us some pointers on how to share space on a plane politely.
In places lacking personal space, like an airplane, it’s important to respect it
Image credits: Jason Toevs / pexels (not the actual photo)
However, this woman didn’t get the memo and felt entitled to control the window shade all the way from her aisle seat
Image credits: Yulia Polyakova / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: SHVETS production / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: jonvox
Lack of space often causes discomfort to passengers
It appears that the tight personal space on airplanes isn’t imaginary. Contrary to many beliefs, it’s not the cause of shrinking seat width but rather the tightening of passenger legroom. The technical term for this is seat pitch, which is the distance between rows, which often varies from airline to airline.
It’s estimated that the biggest US domestic carriers, like American, Delta, Southwest, and United, have lost around 2 to 5 inches in legroom since 2011. On cheaper carriers such as Spirit Airlines, it has decreased even more, dropping to 28 inches. Meanwhile, the average distance today is about 31 inches.
By doing this, it allows the companies to accommodate more passengers in airplane cabins and offer an overall cheaper airfare. However, it has resulted in frustration from flyers who endure discomfort from the lack of space. Some have even started questioning safety, as none of the US airlines’ economy seats meet the standards required for safety positions in case of an emergency.
In addition, federal regulations require that all people be safely evacuated in 90 seconds, and cramped seating significantly interferes with this timing. Under pressure from frustrated passengers, Congress instructed the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) to consider adapting seat standards. In response to these directions, the FAA conducted a series of evacuation tests using 755 volunteers in Oklahoma.
Some of the trials used seats with a 28-inch pitch, one of the narrowest in the industry. The results reveal that “evacuations at a narrow seat pitch are safe for virtually all (99%) of the able-bodied population.” The FAA added, “The study results do not consider passenger comfort (or the lack thereof), which impacts a passenger’s sense of well-being during a flight.”
Image credits: Pew Nguyen / pexels (not the actual photo)
Passengers should know a few etiquette suggestions to ensure a more pleasant journey
Since the lack of personal space in airplanes doesn’t seem to be solved any time soon, passengers should know a few etiquette suggestions to ensure a more pleasant journey and not end up a victim of a petty revenge plan.
Therefore, Bored Panda reached out to etiquette educator Candace Smith, who agreed to share a few pointers on how to behave with neighboring people on a flight. She says that the infamous window shade should be controlled by the person sitting next to it. “Should there be a need or special request, the flight attendant makes the call,” she adds.
Meanwhile, the armrests belong to the person who is sitting in the middle seat. Smith tells us, “My own rule is that middle-seat folks have first rights to armrests. Flight attendants are there to assist if there is a problem.”
The space in front of your seat is also mostly yours. It becomes shared when the person in front of you decides to recline their seat. Typically, how far back they can go should be negotiated with a quick question asking for permission. Meanwhile, the area under your seat belongs to you as long as your things or carry-on bags don’t push into another person’s space.
When an issue of personal space does occur, Smith notes, “Being respectful and courteous to others is always a number one consideration. Asking yourself, “What’s it like to be on the other side of mom?” can serve you well.”
Image credits: Berkalp Turper / pexels (not the actual photo)
The author happily chatted with people in the comments, revealing more about the situation
Some supported author’s actions
While others not so much
Some even shared similar stories
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I dunno, seems like a lot of passive aggression. Flipping someone off, shining a light in their eyes, stopping dead in front of them isn't 'voicing' anger, it's acting out. The OP did manage to be direct once, but they should have done it earlier rather than completing to break the window shade.
Exactly. Someone reaches over like that, I will immediately (and politely) ask them to stop. If they don't I can still escalate and not even be passive-aggressive about it. But all that silence and glaring and plotting petty s**t feels cowardly.
Load More Replies...
Yeah this was an amazing nonstory, "two mildly jerky people sat on a plane, not much happened". Amazing how OP has just been occupied with the Defence Of the Blind for multiple hours.
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I'm surprised nobody has mentioned drawn attention to the fact that whilst she reached over to close the blind, OP was asleep. He was asleep, so that's why she didn't ask him, otherwise it would wake him up. There's also the possibility that she might have been doing it at least partly for OP's benefit.
Passenger was bad, but it seems she was closing the window while OP was sleeping. OP on the other hand went out of her way to be a raging @#$@# to the fellow passenger. I don't understand how people were complimenting her on her behavior. OP spent the remainder of the flight flashing light into someone's face, then went out of her way to infringe on this person's space while they left the airport. I hope OP suffers karma soon.
The OP honestly seems way more annoying to me than the woman who wanted to close the blinds. Am I alone here with that? I'd have probably walked over them standing in my way eventually like one of those English guards if the petty behavior doesn't even stop after leaving the plane, lol! And last but not least: Why the hell should the window seat person be the only one to be allowed to govern the window? Of course you shouldn't just reach in like a monkey to do whatever you want with it, but why not just compromise with each other?
I agree with the person commenting how she was being childish and walking equivalent of road rage, cause that is exactly what it sounded like to me when reading. I can understand the passive aggressive behavior with the watch cause being stuck in a tube but afterwards? That was just childish. She devoted the whole flight towards anger and even after the flight.
I think op and this woman should get married because they deserve each other. I’m sure op is going through life thinking he’s avenging the world from the Karens (and it’s only women, he’d never do it to a man) but is really just an a*****e.
IMO you were both being silly and petty. This could have been resolved in a couple of minutes.
How to say you are afraid fo confrontation without saying so...
On a trip to a cruise (had to fly to get there) our luggage was lost. I always pack a few items in my back pack and we knew they didnt do it on purpose. We were really nice to person helping us at the aiport and the couple in front of us were SUCH JERKS. Yelling and screaming... Husband and I decided not to start out trip like those two. Because we had no luggage we got on the ship super fast. Our luggage showed up that night at our room! We saw that same rude couple on our ship at Customer service (a few days later) we saw them yelling at the person about how they didn't have luggage still. I am convinced the person at the airport found it (same flights, same cruise as us) and kept it to delay it more and had ours rushed to the boat before we left. ALWAYS BE KIND, it cost you nothing and being a jerk can cost you a lot.
Seems to me that OP is a petulant little diaper baby who doesn’t know how to use their words. Also, I’m pretty sure none of this story past the part where the lady closed the shade while OP slept actually happened, but it sure does make for an epic reddit circle j**k 🙄
I suffer from vertigo/motion sickness. On planes I must sit next to the window and look out the window to maintain my bearing. Shut the window and I WILL BARF ON YOU!
There is so much rude behavior in the world today, and people feel the need to get back at people who are rude to them. Yes, the person was rude. Why not just ask her not to close the shade? Why carry your return rudeness on after the flight? Your behavior was immature and really went beyond hers. Flipping her off covertly during the flight? Having your watch reflect light into her eyes? What did that accomplish? Grow up and learn how to deal with people and life. You became the jerk here.
I get that she was annoying and she should've used her words, but by the end of it the OP sounded like a child. Walking in front of her and stopping, and then subtly flipping her off? That's something a child would do.
Personally I would've told her "excuse you , how dare you invade my personal space and slapped the sh#t out of her hand" try it again and the results will be the same."! Nope damn being passive speak your mind because once you acknowledge their actions as being wrong they'll stop.
Seems like anymore, if you voice your displeasure, you end up with the airmarshall in your face and everyone online calling you a Karen. I would have stuck my pillow in there and my head and snoozer. Or at least used it as an armrest or book rest.
I used to be bashful about this sort of entitled nonsense, but I have learned that zoomers only respond to direct physical feedback. I now bite when someone reaches across me without my permission. Sometimes a gasp, sometimes a giggle, sometimes laughter, but nobody has ever done it a second time since.
I pay for that window seat and most of the time I am sticking my face right onto the window to see below me and get the sun on my face. Stretch across me and you will have your arm licked. Do it again, I upgrade to bite - call assault, I will call self defence.
This is when I miss face masks. I loved being able to swear at other people freely (just moving my lips, no vocalisation at all) to release my frustration without actually having a damn rude (and an unhelpful) interaction.
Nothing saying you have to forego face masks, just call yourself extra cautious lol
Load More Replies... The person at the window seat doesn't have the right to control the shade. I've had to ask people to pull the shade up so I can see outside. Why have the shade down while sitting next to the window?
Headache comes to mind. I have offered to give someone my window seat because he had aisle, he refused. I got out the barf bag silently, puffed it out and put it back in the pocket so it was ready. This was before you chose seats. I do not like seeing outside.
Load More Replies... I dunno, seems like a lot of passive aggression. Flipping someone off, shining a light in their eyes, stopping dead in front of them isn't 'voicing' anger, it's acting out. The OP did manage to be direct once, but they should have done it earlier rather than completing to break the window shade.
Exactly. Someone reaches over like that, I will immediately (and politely) ask them to stop. If they don't I can still escalate and not even be passive-aggressive about it. But all that silence and glaring and plotting petty s**t feels cowardly.
Load More Replies... Yeah this was an amazing nonstory, "two mildly jerky people sat on a plane, not much happened". Amazing how OP has just been occupied with the Defence Of the Blind for multiple hours.
Load More Replies... I'm surprised nobody has mentioned drawn attention to the fact that whilst she reached over to close the blind, OP was asleep. He was asleep, so that's why she didn't ask him, otherwise it would wake him up. There's also the possibility that she might have been doing it at least partly for OP's benefit.
Passenger was bad, but it seems she was closing the window while OP was sleeping. OP on the other hand went out of her way to be a raging @#$@# to the fellow passenger. I don't understand how people were complimenting her on her behavior. OP spent the remainder of the flight flashing light into someone's face, then went out of her way to infringe on this person's space while they left the airport. I hope OP suffers karma soon.
The OP honestly seems way more annoying to me than the woman who wanted to close the blinds. Am I alone here with that? I'd have probably walked over them standing in my way eventually like one of those English guards if the petty behavior doesn't even stop after leaving the plane, lol! And last but not least: Why the hell should the window seat person be the only one to be allowed to govern the window? Of course you shouldn't just reach in like a monkey to do whatever you want with it, but why not just compromise with each other?
I agree with the person commenting how she was being childish and walking equivalent of road rage, cause that is exactly what it sounded like to me when reading. I can understand the passive aggressive behavior with the watch cause being stuck in a tube but afterwards? That was just childish. She devoted the whole flight towards anger and even after the flight.
I think op and this woman should get married because they deserve each other. I’m sure op is going through life thinking he’s avenging the world from the Karens (and it’s only women, he’d never do it to a man) but is really just an a*****e.
IMO you were both being silly and petty. This could have been resolved in a couple of minutes.
How to say you are afraid fo confrontation without saying so...
On a trip to a cruise (had to fly to get there) our luggage was lost. I always pack a few items in my back pack and we knew they didnt do it on purpose. We were really nice to person helping us at the aiport and the couple in front of us were SUCH JERKS. Yelling and screaming... Husband and I decided not to start out trip like those two. Because we had no luggage we got on the ship super fast. Our luggage showed up that night at our room! We saw that same rude couple on our ship at Customer service (a few days later) we saw them yelling at the person about how they didn't have luggage still. I am convinced the person at the airport found it (same flights, same cruise as us) and kept it to delay it more and had ours rushed to the boat before we left. ALWAYS BE KIND, it cost you nothing and being a jerk can cost you a lot.
Seems to me that OP is a petulant little diaper baby who doesn’t know how to use their words. Also, I’m pretty sure none of this story past the part where the lady closed the shade while OP slept actually happened, but it sure does make for an epic reddit circle j**k 🙄
I suffer from vertigo/motion sickness. On planes I must sit next to the window and look out the window to maintain my bearing. Shut the window and I WILL BARF ON YOU!
There is so much rude behavior in the world today, and people feel the need to get back at people who are rude to them. Yes, the person was rude. Why not just ask her not to close the shade? Why carry your return rudeness on after the flight? Your behavior was immature and really went beyond hers. Flipping her off covertly during the flight? Having your watch reflect light into her eyes? What did that accomplish? Grow up and learn how to deal with people and life. You became the jerk here.
I get that she was annoying and she should've used her words, but by the end of it the OP sounded like a child. Walking in front of her and stopping, and then subtly flipping her off? That's something a child would do.
Personally I would've told her "excuse you , how dare you invade my personal space and slapped the sh#t out of her hand" try it again and the results will be the same."! Nope damn being passive speak your mind because once you acknowledge their actions as being wrong they'll stop.
Seems like anymore, if you voice your displeasure, you end up with the airmarshall in your face and everyone online calling you a Karen. I would have stuck my pillow in there and my head and snoozer. Or at least used it as an armrest or book rest.
I used to be bashful about this sort of entitled nonsense, but I have learned that zoomers only respond to direct physical feedback. I now bite when someone reaches across me without my permission. Sometimes a gasp, sometimes a giggle, sometimes laughter, but nobody has ever done it a second time since.
I pay for that window seat and most of the time I am sticking my face right onto the window to see below me and get the sun on my face. Stretch across me and you will have your arm licked. Do it again, I upgrade to bite - call assault, I will call self defence.
This is when I miss face masks. I loved being able to swear at other people freely (just moving my lips, no vocalisation at all) to release my frustration without actually having a damn rude (and an unhelpful) interaction.
Nothing saying you have to forego face masks, just call yourself extra cautious lol
Load More Replies... The person at the window seat doesn't have the right to control the shade. I've had to ask people to pull the shade up so I can see outside. Why have the shade down while sitting next to the window?
Headache comes to mind. I have offered to give someone my window seat because he had aisle, he refused. I got out the barf bag silently, puffed it out and put it back in the pocket so it was ready. This was before you chose seats. I do not like seeing outside.
Load More Replies...
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