“What’s The Stupidest ‘Real Men Don’t…’ You’ve Ever Heard?” (50 Answers)
Interview
Even in this day and age in developed countries, there’s still an expectation that men ought to behave in a certain way. Instead of embracing the wide range of human emotions and interests, these men are told to be aggressive while avoiding any sort of vulnerability. This can lead to a lot of issues down the line.
Redditor u/callmevicious sparked an important discussion on the internet after asking people to share the dumbest things they’ve ever heard someone say that ‘real men’ supposedly don’t do. And the idea that ‘real men’ don’t hug their sons is just the tip of the iceberg of toxicity… scroll down to see some of the other awful expectations guys have had set for them.
Bored Panda got in touch with the author of the thread, u/callmevicious, to get their thoughts on toxic and healthy masculinity. You'll find our interview with the OP as you read on.
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Real men don't put cream in their coffee. I responded with, "real men don't give a s**t what other men think of their beverage choices."
Well, despite that fact that I'm a 210 pound, masculine former rugby player who drives a pickup and has been married to the same woman for 31 years, i am in fact gay because: * I cook * I like a grande no-whip mocha * I wash my a*s * I say "Good morning" to other dudes * I sometimes drink fruity cocktails * I like chocolate, deserts and sometimes Luna bars * I use a rolling suitcase and wear sunscreen * I like the occassional rom-com and British period piece. Geez, it's amazing I'm not living in a bathhouse.... WTF?
Real Men don't show their own children affection or accept affection from them, apparently.
Edit: Holy s**t this blew up. On behalf of all dads out there, I’m sending all of you a virtual hug. Every kid deserves to know they’re loved.
We wanted to get the thread author's thoughts on why their thread got so much attention on the internet. According to them, Reddit is "still male-dominated," which is why the topic made such a big splash.
"We as a society haven't really focused much on the 'old school' pressures we still put on men to appear stoic/strong/etc.," they told Bored Panda.
We asked redditor u/callmevicious about what could help someone become more aware that they might have toxic masculine values. "Repression leads to perversion. If you feel uncomfortable expressing certain emotions, that's something you need to work on," the OP shared their thoughts.
"A certain portion of the population still feels there is a social stigma attached to men expressing emotional vulnerability. It's when men bottle things up that they begin to feel desperate and feel compelled to reach out to the more extreme male-dominated, and toxic, corners of the internet, looking for understanding."
Real men don't eat bananas. I just went to a bachelor party where I was the only gay man. I flew in from out of town so I asked the person buying the food for the weekend to get me some bananas for my breakfast. No one else would eat a banana that weekend. One guy even cracked a joke about how it was gay to eat a banana. When I eat a banana I'm thinking about a banana. If you think about a p***s when you see a banana, maybe you have some unresolved issues.
BP!!! Please get over your prudishness about even actual medical names for body parts being typed entirely out, for real. A P3nis is a penis. A v@gin@ is a vagina. Get over it!!
Anything behind that is stupid. Literally anything. There is no such thing as "real men". If you identify as a man, you are a man, no matter what you wear, how you behave, what you do for a living and what gender your partner is.
This "real men don't" should go die in a fire, no matter what follows behind it.
I’m more of a real man than anyone who tries to qualify something as “real men” and I’m the queerest gay homo fae fāg on the planet.
"Real men don't order dessert."
I'm sorry, it's "gay" to like sugar? This real man is gonna deep throat a bananas foster while holding eye contact with you the entire time.
Meanwhile, the redditor shed some light on the main signs of someone who has embraced healthy masculinity. In their opinion, dignity and integrity are the most vital.
"Respect for yourself and others, particularly those who may be more vulnerable or face more of a struggle than you do. Having a sense of community is crucial; feeling both responsible for and needed by those around you," they said.
"One of the most oft-cited quotes on Reddit is, 'A child that is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.' A lot of these guys feel not only isolated but unwanted. The only solution for it is to leave your keyboard and actually interact with people, without the buffer of a screen between you."
I was at Joanns and the man behind me in line was buying something for his wife and didn't have any coupons. I told him about the app and the website and offered to pull up my coupons for him to use.
He laughed and said "Boys don't use coupons"
So weird. It's free money. How fragile is your masculinity that you pay full price when you don't have to.
Change diapers.
We had four kids and I was a union steel worker. I took a withdrawal on the union card because the cost of daycare for children was just ridiculous, so my wife, who was a school teacher carried the benefits and I stayed home with our last kid.
I had more than one ironworker tell me that real men don’t change diapers.
I asked them what they would do if their kid had a dirty diaper, and they all said the same thing.
They would have to sit in it until the wife got home.
It was then I realized how ignorant these guys were.
So real men maliciously neglect their children's basic needs?
My dad told me once, "Men don't say thingy."
And frankly I agree. A man should speak eloquently. Be sure to enunciate. A say specifically what you mean.
Besides, there are way better words than 'thingy".
For example, doohickey, thingamajig, whatchyacallit, or whoswhatsit are of my favorites.
Ah.. the fun me and the missus have had during a building emergency when I've asked her to pass me the thingy..... 'no.. not that.. the thingymajig.... there... no not there.. the who'd youmaflip next to it.. no.. not that f*****g way... oh christ's sake... the wottsit with the handle.... not that one... how the f**k could that fit on this nut? right... are you taking the p**s now? I swear to f*****g god you're doing this on purpose now..... stop laughing... it ain't funny till we've stopped the flooding..... here hold this whilst I go and have a smoke look in the garage.
The r/AskReddit thread made a massive splash on the internet. At the time of writing, Reddit user u/callmevicious’ question had 24k upvotes. The topic was incredibly popular, which just goes to show that toxic masculinity is still alive and kicking in this day and age. On the flip side, more men are aware of the dangers it poses.
Verywell Mind points out that toxic masculinity creates “extreme pressure” to behave in ways that are detrimental to their emotional, mental, and physical health. These men are expected to act tough, be aggressive, reject anything even closely resembling femininity, and strive to attain power and status.
A guy at work described something his daughter did as “cute” and then some douche told him that men aren’t supposed to call things cute.
I would have pinched his cheek and said 'there there - you're a little cutie too'
"cry" literally everyone cries stfu.
My husband cried when both our daughters were born and it made me love him even more!!! So yes, seriously STFU with that b******t nonsense!!!!
A huge problem with toxic masculinity is that it glorifies unhealthy habits. There’s a warped belief that self-care is meant for women only and that men should just tough things out. The result is that some men avoid going to see doctors when they run into health issues. They also avoid seeking a therapist’s help when they’re struggling with their mental and emotional health because they see it as a sign of weakness.
Meanwhile, the more a man embraces toxic masculinity, the more they are to engage in risky behaviors, from heavy drinking and using tobacco to avoiding veggies and greens. Combine that with the unwillingness to ask for help when health issues pop up and you have a disaster waiting to strike.
Drink fruity cocktails, dude, my cocktail has 5 spirits in it, it's way more alcohol than your 3.x% abv. beer and it tastes nice .
My best friend in high school (male) ordered pink lemonade when we were out to dinner and my parents made fun of him all night after we dropped him off. I got real mad and defensive and told my dad he must be gay too because all he drinks is the yellow lemonade my mom makes and there's no difference but the color
Wear pink. Pink is an awesome color - and you’re a little b***h if you think I’m not rocking an awesome color.
1. My cousin was working at a chocolate shop and said a guy barged in asking for "chocolate for MEN." She never did figure out what he was talking about.
2. My grandfather firmly believed real men didn't smile in photos. Smiling = gay in his mind (needless to say he was a homophobe).
Chocolate for real men has tobacco and ground glass in it. And no sugar.
Broadly speaking, toxic men tend to hold sexist ideals. They tend to think that men are ‘superior’ to women and, so, avoid expressing their emotions, doing housework, and being involved in childcare. This extends to the type of interests, hobbies, and careers ‘real men’ can have. Someone with a toxic masculinity mindset might think, for instance, that anyone who is into dancing, sewing, cooking, or works as a nurse may not be as tough or worthy of respect as others.
These very same men also usually hold homophobic beliefs, often try to intimidate or bully others into submission, and are resistant to change. However, change is very much possible. And it starts with more self-awareness, and the willingness to ask oneself why they’re behaving the way that they are. Embracing the full range of human feelings and asking for help are not signs of weakness. Quite the opposite—they show a man is honest with himself, and has the strength, maturity, self-confidence, and resilience to be vulnerable when needed.
Not sure if it counts, but a young woman wouldn’t sell me a Luna Bar because it’s made for women. I said “No. It’s marketed to women. But I like this flavor.” She said “I can’t sell it to you. It has estrogen in it.” We had a frustrating back and forth before I finally convinced her that I was willing to take the risk and she sold it to me.
"Hug their sons."
My dad hugged my brother for the first time when he was 18 and graduated high school. Dad was raised by his parents to not show outwardly love towards his children because that would "spoil" us. Our childhood was...odd.
First and last time I saw my dad cry was when his bird hunting dog died. As he dug the hole to bury it in their backyard.
The older generations were tougher, sure, but I know my dad would have benefited greatly from being hugged more as a child. That s**t gets passed down.
My dad hugged us until my older brother was 12 and shrugged him off, told him he hated to be hugged. He got the idea that boys didn't need hugging. Not abuse, a good, loving dad, but off with the hugs. Fast-forward to me, 32, and he and my mom helped me to get the divorce my wife was demanding, and I told him that when I got home, he'd better stand by. He was waiting at the door, and we hugged, and he was a hug bear for the rest of his life. Just needed to be told it was okay. I wish I' could go back and have my 10 yo self tell him, "Daddy, I still want to be hugged."
Eat dessert. Seriously. I was told it was gay to eat dessert. "Because children and women like sweet things."
F**k you, Paul, I am going to eat this raspberry cheesecake.
I recently saw “If you’re a straight man and go see the Barbie movie you’re 100% a beta” I thought, “I’m so sorry that someone called you a beta once and that ever since you’ve been critical of your fellow man by hamfistedly dissecting everyone’s choices through an arbitrary and nonsensical social hierarchy platform that only exists to a few and matters to less! Bruh, you could do with some content that boldly and artistically tackles some questions of who we are in the universe, society and what real support and true friendship looks like. Maybe go see Barbie?”
I've no interest whatsoever in the Barbie movie, but I'm not about to tell someone else what movies to watch.
Pick anything that Andrew tate prick says and it’s probably gunna be up there with the most stupid
My former boss would die on the hill of "real men don't use rolling suitcases." He'd sooner throw out his shoulder carrying a heavy duffel bag than ever be caught dead rolling a suitcase through an airport.
Edit: forgot to add he also thinks "neck pillows are fruity" and can't stand when men wear them around their neck on planes. Also, re: the comments about benefits of hiking backpacks, I don't think I ever saw him sport a two-strap. Fellas, is it gay to have even weight distribution on your shoulders?
This obsession with portraying some kind of strong image is more about hiding insecurity than anything else. And I don’t really like those neck pillows because of the bubbly texture of their stuffings, but how come a luggage or pillow option defines a person's sexuality? SMH.
I was told that really men never look at their nails with their palm down and would only ever look at their nails with their palm up and fingers curled.
I gotta wonder how secure in your masculinity you've got to be to spend time even thinking about the right way to look at your nails.
What if they're having a tantrum and slap the table and accidentally catch sight of their nails and suddenly - poof! - not a real man.
"Real men don't let women be on top during sex, because being on the bottom is a submissive position"
Fellas? Is it gay to have sex with a woman?
"Real men don't speak French"
When we were kids, my mother would speak to us in French and my dad in English. By pure coincidence, every other bilingual couple we knew was doing it the same way around. So when my little brother was 4, he decided men spoke English and women spoke French. He still understood French perfectly, but he refused to speak it. He'd also burst into tears when he heard an adult speaking the wrong language for their gender.
My mother told the school about this when she registered him for kindergarten. They put him in a class with a male francophone teacher and he got over himself pretty quickly.
Funny. I thought most French men, at the very least, would speak French. Silly of me, I know.
Real men don't lift under (insert weight). Everyone has to start somewhere d**k head. I have been lifting for years but when I see a new kid try lifting crazy heavy with bad form I warn him it's a good way to get hurt. If they don't listen then that's on them.
Have to start somewhere. Even the biggest guys in the gym started out small and perhaps even weak.
My friends once introduced me to this guy who was talking REALLY LOUDLY.
I thought maybe he didn't realize how loud he was being so I said "you're a little loud."
Dude said "real men talk loud. Chicks like that."
I did not like that.
Ok so based on this a real man is a guy who:
Is sunburned. Smells because he doesn’t wash his a*s. Screams what he wants with very basic language.
Oh wow the lady must be swooning
Real men don't love their women as much as or more than she loves him. He has to always love her less and be less emotional to hold more power in the relationship.
"Read the Instructions"
Yes, it's so gay for a man to want his new desk or grill or fooz ball table to be properly put together.
Once saw a woman on twitter say something like “if a man is too eager when the free bread gets to the table that’s sus” and I was just blown away by that one
Wannabe tough guy: "Real men don't cook... Only women and gay men cook."
Me: "What about male Chef's like Gordon Ramsay?"
Response A) They're closeted gay men.
Or
Response B) A Chef is a paid position so it doesn't count.
Have long hair. I don't understand it at all. If Eddie van Halen can have long hair, then I can too.
Real men don't put others first.
I have a big family and a lot of my siblings have problems. I do my best to help them, even if it means putting their needs ahead of mine.
My ex-fiance thought this made me weak. A real man doesn't take care of other people, he puts himself first and takes what he wants. Going out of my way to help my brother, lending him money when he needed it, spending time giving him advice, made me a little b***h in her eyes.
We're no longer together.
My ex husband used to say real men don't eat popsicles.
Edit to add: my current husband loves popsicles, ex husband was a POS who never got to experience the joy of an icy treat on a hot summer day in the south.
When I was 14 or so, I got my left ear pierced. An older cousin of mine worked at Piercing Pagoda in the mall (mid 90s), and he did it for me.
When my father noticed, he was beside himself and went on and on about me being a sissy. I removed it right away.
Anyway, it turns out that Dad was a self-hating closet-case. Still is.
I've had two in my left and two in my right since I was 15. And let me tell you, I'm of that age where only "pirates and pooftahs" had earrings as a general rule. IDC, they looked amazing. Thankfully it's not remotely a thing anymore and we've all got them.
The pirates and pooftahs line alone gets a green arrow, lol. I'm of the same age and I know exactly what you mean.
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I’d actually love to get my ears pierced, I love how earrings look
Go for it, once they've properly healed you don't need to wear them all the time and they are dead easy to care for.
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you should tell him that you wanna be a pirate, that is a manly thing.
Covered the bases got both ears and wore little skull earrings with a dagger dangling from the left one. Had the added benefit of pissing the parents off
Does that earring mean you're gay? Well bend over and let's find out.
“Left is right [hetero] and right is wrong.” Stupid mantra for ignorant people.
I was the second boy in my high school, back in 85, to get his ear pierced. I still have two earrings to this day.
I saw a video of a woman saying “Real men don’t eat peanut butter and jelly” and I was flabbergasted.
Yeah, IDGAF, if it tastes good, I'm eating it. Tomahawk steak or a PB&J sandwich or the fruitiest, prettiest dessert...get in my belly!
Real men don’t tell their wives/girlfriends they’re going to go somewhere/do something they just do it. And if they don’t like it that’s too bad.
Like dude what?
Real men don't use straws lol. I've always thought like, no, "real men" drink however they damn well please
*... Don't eat sweet things like candy or chocolate, it's gay.*
I f*****g love chocolate so I'm probably the biggest gaylord out there.
Real men dont drink fruity drink, only beers and hard liquor.
F**k off. I drink something if it taste good and i will die before doing 50 differents type of faces just to swallow something that taste like satan b******e and batteries acids
“Sleep on their stomachs”
This one gets me. I've done a lot of time in county lockup and I sleep in my bunk however I like. No one has ever even mentioned anything close to this.
Apparently I'm a man. That's going to surprise my husband
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The opposite of manly isn't gay, it's unmanly!!! Disturbing to see how many 'progressive' men in this list and the reactions still seem to think gay and unmanly are the same thing.
Shagging a bloke is one of the manliest activities there is. It's literally all man.
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The real men don’t wash their a*s is the one that scares me the most. Like, umm, that’s basic hygiene. No one of any gender gonna want to be around you smelling like boo-boo 💩.
And even worse, expecting a lover to venture down there when they haven't bothered wiping their b******e.
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so REAL MEN™️ are dirty, joyless, loveless, angry lumps of fear. gotcha gotcha.
Real men only breathe tobacco smoke and hooker farts.
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to a point. Men can't be biological mothers. that whole lack of a uterus makes it impossible.
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Having cats is a weird one. People's odd prejudice against cats in general is effing weird. Another weird one is enjoying Disneyland or theme parks. My boyf and I love it, me more than him (I'm a woman) but like he's been given s**t for wanting to go with me since it's a place for girls and babies. Actually shaming Disney adults at all is messed up too. It's kind of why I prefer Tokyo Disney, there are so many couples there and people of all ages, I never felt shamed.
The cats one is because you can’t have control over cats like you can dogs. Cats aren’t “submissive” enough to be “masculine”
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Another daily dose of a human stupidity. My eyeballs rolled back 360 degrees reading all this b******t
180 you mean? 360 would be all the back to the front again.
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Just sharing a fun thing my dad taught me when I first cut my hair short. It always shut up anyone being an asshoIe: “your heteronormative polemic is infantile.” (Your sexist assumption/statement is immature and childish)
I remember a briefly popular book back in the '80s called "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche" which was full of these. Even then it was firmly tongue in cheek. But I don't think anywhere did it contain anything to suggest that the opposite of a 'real man' was to be gay. I've never understood why anyone, however masculine, could confuse one's sexuality with how hard and rugged one may present oneself.
Indeed, I read a study once about gay men having n g higher levels of testosterone and larger penises than straight men.
Load More Replies... When I see a person that is happy en confident, I can just enjoy that. Wether a man, woman, or whatever. People need to stop being insecure and stop shaming everything because they are insecure.
Maybe I'm just privileged but, as a European, the "list" of what real men don't do is much shorter. Yes, I've heard the occasional "real men don't cry or show emotions", or something about wearing pink... but...don't wash your a*s?! Don't eat desserts and chocolate?! Don't wear sunscreen?! What?! But I'm guessing that half Americans probably think European men are all a little gay so that explains it 😄
you're privileged. Almost all American men don't think about European men or women at all.
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There’s only one “real men don’t” that’s actually true. Real men don’t say they’re women.
The truth is: real men do what they think is right, regardless of what any one else says they should or should not do.
So many items on this list stem from "X is for women, and being like a woman is bad/shameful/degrading".
Real men don't change nappies or do anything remotely like care for their children. Apparently the douce canoe I'm related to by blood had no part in the conception of his 3 children cause his ex's all got pregnant without his help, so he was within his manly rights to not do any care and looking after the children. He convinced the 1st ex he was sterile so the second child must have been a huge surprise.
I propose we practice script flips. In my head, I respond to some bro making fun of my clothes with "I didn't think people around here were so sensitive about fashion". If some bro is angry, aggressive, condescending, or just mean to you, allude to their sensitivity. Carefully though, in my head, I also get punched, lol
Apparently it’s weak to know how to do literally anything. “Real men” are glorified children ig
Real men are such fragile wilting blossoms that they are threatened by beverages and coupons.
Judging by majority of the list here, I'm most likely an artificial man. Oh well, more candy, ice cream, fruity drinks (not too keen on alcohol, personal preference), scented candles etc for me!!! Who's with me? I don't mind sharing :-)
Real men don't let other people define them. Real men have the courage to act decently towards others. Real men definitely wash every part of themselves because it's disgusting if you don't. Real men define for themselves what it is to be man because they have a brain. Real men can be a real bad a** by thinking for themselves, by being willing to stop the fake "real men" from disrespecting women, children, and other men. Real men love their kids and will beat any clown that says affection from kids is weak. Real men show who they are, think dudes who need to tell other guys what a man is are weak little cupcakes, and think this subject is dumb and a weak attempt to be controlling.
Being a "REAL MAN' sounds absolutely miserable. Actually sharing the same oxygen with a "REAL MAN" sounds absolutely miserable.
Wow. I haven't heard a single one of these. Surprisingly one of the most common ones comes in close to the end: "Real men don't eat quiche". Next time try some research. It's the very first thing that pops up when you do a Google or Bing search.
I did make this comment about Feirsteins book! . It's like whoever is writing these posts doesn't do any research at all but cuts and pastes c**p off another internet post and calls it original. This is what passes for journalism these days.
Load More Replies... This by far and large the most stupid list that I have ever read on BP. Just stopped reading after 5 post. Nothing to be happy about. Next!
If you don't watch football/soccer you are NOT a real man.......yeah right, so real men like watching men in shorts running around and hugging and kissing when they score.
Besides how all these examples combined paint a picture of an insecure, FILTHY, joyless, abusive sociopath, I'm reminded how notorious drug lord Pablo Escobar, who killed SCORES of people and basically ruled Colombia was still a loving family man considering: -He took PRIDE in changing his children's diapers rather than leaving it to his wife or a nanny. -While on the run, would sooner burn his getaway money without a moment's hesitation than let his children be cold. -Was finally tracked down BECAUSE he was on the phone with his son. So if a criminal so infamous that his catchphrase was "Plata o Plomo" ("Silver or lead" as in take a bribe or a bullet,) was such a domestic threat that his initial "confinement" was his own party mansion that he often snuck out of anyway like a "Batman" villain and required an international effort to take him down, comes off like a better father/man than you, you need to reevaluate your life.
Don't listen to criticism from people that you don't know, and you wouldn't ask for advice anyhow. Being a man is just "Mind over Matter". You shouldn't mind, and they don't matter.
So what does make a truly manly man? He controls himself, protects those weaker than himself, has the strength to apologize when necessary, and cleans up his own messes. His macho ego is not so fragile that he feels threatened by any of the nonsense listed above.
Nor does he feel the need to resopond with violence to every threat and insult.
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A lot to unpack here. I detest the dichotomy of "real men" vs "gay men" all though the posts and comments. Whoever said that gay men can't be real? On the other hand, I've never seen chocolates or cocktails marketed for men, when a lot of other ridiculous products such as vitamins are marketed for men. It would be very interesting to do a survey of what proportion of men actually do the things listed above - often. As a SNAG sensitive new age guy, even I don't do half of the things listed above.
When I wasn't feeling sad for a bunch dumbasses not enjoying life because of these stupid beliefs, I was laughing my a*s off.
If there is such a thing as "real men", I know one thing. Real men don't use the phrase "real men". So if you think you are, then you know you're not.
So if you listen to the guys sprouting all that nonsense 'real' men are fragile prissies who can't deal with sh;t and falter as soon as they wear a different colour than others. Gotcha. You're an insecure 9 year old playing adult trying to make adult men conform to your fantasies. Now move on.
Unfortunately, far too many men who think they are real, and are anything but.
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Good gracious. If any man anywhere does something, anything, then real men do that thing. Because men are humans & humans do all those things.
Watch the people who know when titles and content has been ripped off from another author tear into the plagiarist who doesn't believe anyone might know they've ripped off another author because they believe their readership is too young/stupid to know they aren't writing original content? Yes-let the bloodshed begin!!
Load More Replies... Apparently I'm a man. That's going to surprise my husband
Load More Replies... The opposite of manly isn't gay, it's unmanly!!! Disturbing to see how many 'progressive' men in this list and the reactions still seem to think gay and unmanly are the same thing.
Shagging a bloke is one of the manliest activities there is. It's literally all man.
Load More Replies... The real men don’t wash their a*s is the one that scares me the most. Like, umm, that’s basic hygiene. No one of any gender gonna want to be around you smelling like boo-boo 💩.
And even worse, expecting a lover to venture down there when they haven't bothered wiping their b******e.
Load More Replies... so REAL MEN™️ are dirty, joyless, loveless, angry lumps of fear. gotcha gotcha.
Real men only breathe tobacco smoke and hooker farts.
Load More Replies... to a point. Men can't be biological mothers. that whole lack of a uterus makes it impossible.
Load More Replies... Having cats is a weird one. People's odd prejudice against cats in general is effing weird. Another weird one is enjoying Disneyland or theme parks. My boyf and I love it, me more than him (I'm a woman) but like he's been given s**t for wanting to go with me since it's a place for girls and babies. Actually shaming Disney adults at all is messed up too. It's kind of why I prefer Tokyo Disney, there are so many couples there and people of all ages, I never felt shamed.
The cats one is because you can’t have control over cats like you can dogs. Cats aren’t “submissive” enough to be “masculine”
Load More Replies... Another daily dose of a human stupidity. My eyeballs rolled back 360 degrees reading all this b******t
180 you mean? 360 would be all the back to the front again.
Load More Replies... Just sharing a fun thing my dad taught me when I first cut my hair short. It always shut up anyone being an asshoIe: “your heteronormative polemic is infantile.” (Your sexist assumption/statement is immature and childish)
I remember a briefly popular book back in the '80s called "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche" which was full of these. Even then it was firmly tongue in cheek. But I don't think anywhere did it contain anything to suggest that the opposite of a 'real man' was to be gay. I've never understood why anyone, however masculine, could confuse one's sexuality with how hard and rugged one may present oneself.
Indeed, I read a study once about gay men having n g higher levels of testosterone and larger penises than straight men.
Load More Replies... When I see a person that is happy en confident, I can just enjoy that. Wether a man, woman, or whatever. People need to stop being insecure and stop shaming everything because they are insecure.
Maybe I'm just privileged but, as a European, the "list" of what real men don't do is much shorter. Yes, I've heard the occasional "real men don't cry or show emotions", or something about wearing pink... but...don't wash your a*s?! Don't eat desserts and chocolate?! Don't wear sunscreen?! What?! But I'm guessing that half Americans probably think European men are all a little gay so that explains it 😄
you're privileged. Almost all American men don't think about European men or women at all.
Load More Replies... There’s only one “real men don’t” that’s actually true. Real men don’t say they’re women.
The truth is: real men do what they think is right, regardless of what any one else says they should or should not do.
So many items on this list stem from "X is for women, and being like a woman is bad/shameful/degrading".
Real men don't change nappies or do anything remotely like care for their children. Apparently the douce canoe I'm related to by blood had no part in the conception of his 3 children cause his ex's all got pregnant without his help, so he was within his manly rights to not do any care and looking after the children. He convinced the 1st ex he was sterile so the second child must have been a huge surprise.
I propose we practice script flips. In my head, I respond to some bro making fun of my clothes with "I didn't think people around here were so sensitive about fashion". If some bro is angry, aggressive, condescending, or just mean to you, allude to their sensitivity. Carefully though, in my head, I also get punched, lol
Apparently it’s weak to know how to do literally anything. “Real men” are glorified children ig
Real men are such fragile wilting blossoms that they are threatened by beverages and coupons.
Judging by majority of the list here, I'm most likely an artificial man. Oh well, more candy, ice cream, fruity drinks (not too keen on alcohol, personal preference), scented candles etc for me!!! Who's with me? I don't mind sharing :-)
Real men don't let other people define them. Real men have the courage to act decently towards others. Real men definitely wash every part of themselves because it's disgusting if you don't. Real men define for themselves what it is to be man because they have a brain. Real men can be a real bad a** by thinking for themselves, by being willing to stop the fake "real men" from disrespecting women, children, and other men. Real men love their kids and will beat any clown that says affection from kids is weak. Real men show who they are, think dudes who need to tell other guys what a man is are weak little cupcakes, and think this subject is dumb and a weak attempt to be controlling.
Being a "REAL MAN' sounds absolutely miserable. Actually sharing the same oxygen with a "REAL MAN" sounds absolutely miserable.
Wow. I haven't heard a single one of these. Surprisingly one of the most common ones comes in close to the end: "Real men don't eat quiche". Next time try some research. It's the very first thing that pops up when you do a Google or Bing search.
I did make this comment about Feirsteins book! . It's like whoever is writing these posts doesn't do any research at all but cuts and pastes c**p off another internet post and calls it original. This is what passes for journalism these days.
Load More Replies... This by far and large the most stupid list that I have ever read on BP. Just stopped reading after 5 post. Nothing to be happy about. Next!
If you don't watch football/soccer you are NOT a real man.......yeah right, so real men like watching men in shorts running around and hugging and kissing when they score.
Besides how all these examples combined paint a picture of an insecure, FILTHY, joyless, abusive sociopath, I'm reminded how notorious drug lord Pablo Escobar, who killed SCORES of people and basically ruled Colombia was still a loving family man considering: -He took PRIDE in changing his children's diapers rather than leaving it to his wife or a nanny. -While on the run, would sooner burn his getaway money without a moment's hesitation than let his children be cold. -Was finally tracked down BECAUSE he was on the phone with his son. So if a criminal so infamous that his catchphrase was "Plata o Plomo" ("Silver or lead" as in take a bribe or a bullet,) was such a domestic threat that his initial "confinement" was his own party mansion that he often snuck out of anyway like a "Batman" villain and required an international effort to take him down, comes off like a better father/man than you, you need to reevaluate your life.
Don't listen to criticism from people that you don't know, and you wouldn't ask for advice anyhow. Being a man is just "Mind over Matter". You shouldn't mind, and they don't matter.
So what does make a truly manly man? He controls himself, protects those weaker than himself, has the strength to apologize when necessary, and cleans up his own messes. His macho ego is not so fragile that he feels threatened by any of the nonsense listed above.
Nor does he feel the need to resopond with violence to every threat and insult.
Load More Replies... A lot to unpack here. I detest the dichotomy of "real men" vs "gay men" all though the posts and comments. Whoever said that gay men can't be real? On the other hand, I've never seen chocolates or cocktails marketed for men, when a lot of other ridiculous products such as vitamins are marketed for men. It would be very interesting to do a survey of what proportion of men actually do the things listed above - often. As a SNAG sensitive new age guy, even I don't do half of the things listed above.
When I wasn't feeling sad for a bunch dumbasses not enjoying life because of these stupid beliefs, I was laughing my a*s off.
If there is such a thing as "real men", I know one thing. Real men don't use the phrase "real men". So if you think you are, then you know you're not.
So if you listen to the guys sprouting all that nonsense 'real' men are fragile prissies who can't deal with sh;t and falter as soon as they wear a different colour than others. Gotcha. You're an insecure 9 year old playing adult trying to make adult men conform to your fantasies. Now move on.
Unfortunately, far too many men who think they are real, and are anything but.
Load More Replies... Good gracious. If any man anywhere does something, anything, then real men do that thing. Because men are humans & humans do all those things.
Watch the people who know when titles and content has been ripped off from another author tear into the plagiarist who doesn't believe anyone might know they've ripped off another author because they believe their readership is too young/stupid to know they aren't writing original content? Yes-let the bloodshed begin!!
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