There are places for humor, philosophy, arts and crafts, and so on. But there’s only one place where all these things can meet in one building—a school. Among many things that are being taught there, a few more subjects, like friendships and relationships, are learned by the young students themselves. And one thing that can help develop these connections are school jokes.
If you’re new and want to break the ice in conversations both with students and teachers, these jokes about school can surely come in handy. Of course, the jokes must be said at the right time and place to warrant a correct response. While it can be a great joke, an out-of-place one-liner might not get the best reception.
Many schools have their own meme culture, but cracking up students isn’t too strenuous of a task. Schoolteachers, however, are a whole different story. But there’s absolutely no better feeling than cracking jokes for school so funny that even teachers can’t help but laugh at them.
So dive into this collection of funny school jokes and get cracking! Make sure to pick your timings right though, both for students and teachers!
Where do pencils go on vacation?
Pencil-vania.
Report
Why isn’t there a clock in the library?
Because it tocks too much.
Report
Which animal cheats in the exams?
Cheatah.
Report
Why didn’t the sun go to college?
Because it already had a million degrees.
Report
How much do computers eat for lunch?
A byte.
Report
What is a snake’s favorite subject in school?
Hisssssstory.
Report
Which school supply is king of the classroom?
A ruler.
Report
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
Report
Why did the dog do so well in school?
Because he was the teacher’s pet.
Report
Why don’t giraffes go to elementary school?
Because they go to high school.
Report
What U.S. state has the most math teachers?
Mathachussets.
Report
A book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.
Report
Why was the cafeteria clock behind on the first day?
It kept going back four seconds.
Report
Why do math books always look so sad?
They are full of problems.
Report
What did the pen say to the pencil?
"What’s your point?"
Report
What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?
A bookworm.
Report
What happened when the teacher tied all the kid’s shoelaces together?
They had a big class trip.
Report
Why did the student bring scissors to school?
Because he wanted to cut class.
Report
How do bees go to school?
By school buzz.
Report
Why is beer never served at a math party?
Because you should never drink and derive.
Report
What’s the best place to grow flowers in school?
In kindergarden.
Report
Why do magicians do so well in school?
They’re good at trick questions.
Report
Why did the kid eat his homework?
Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Report
Where do surfers go to school?
Boarding school.
Report
What did one pencil say to the other on the first day of school?
"Looking sharp!"
Report
Why was the broom late for school?
He over swept.
Report
How do the fish get to school?
The octobus!
Report
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pencil.
Pencil who?
Never mind, this is pointless.
Report
Why do calculators make great friends?
You can always count on them.
Report
What did the teacher say about the pizza student?
"There’s mushroom for improvement!"
Report
What vegetables to librarians like?
Quiet peas.
Report
What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil?
"Stop going in circles and get to the point!"
Report
Why did the student throw her watch out of the school window?
She wanted to see time fly.
Report
A butterfly’s favorite subject?
MOTHematics.
Report
What do math students eat on Halloween?
The Pumpkin Pi.
Report
Why is the obtuse angle always upset?
Because it can never be right.
Report
Why did the echo get detention the first day?
It kept answering back.
Report
Why did the boy steal a chair from the classroom?
Because the teacher told him to take a seat.
Report
How do you make seven even?
Take away the 's'.
Report
Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
Report
Why did the square and triangle go to the gym?
To stay in shape.
Report
Why do music teachers do well in a baseball game?
Because they have a perfect pitch.
Report
When do student astronauts eat?
During LAUNCH time.
Report
What is the blackboard’s favorite drink?
Hot chalkolate.
Report
Why do we measure a snake in inches?
Because it does not have feet.
Report
What’s a frog’s favorite year?
Leap year.
Report
What’s so difficult about music class?
You have to write down many notes.
Report
What does an overqualified circle have?
360 degrees.
Report
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?
Because her students were so bright.
Report
What time would it be if Godzilla came to school?
Time to run!
Report
Why did the teacher draw on the window?
Because he wanted his lesson to be very clear!
Report
What do elves learn in school?
The elf-a-bet.
Report
Why did the egg get thrown out of class?
Because he kept telling yolks.
Report
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools.
Report
What do you need to go to high school?
A ladder.
Report
Why did the teacher jump into the pool?
He wanted to test the water.
Report
What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?
Pick them up and roll them back!
Report
What did the student say to the teacher after he missed the first day of school?
"No, ma’am. I didn’t miss it at all."
Report
How does a scientist freshen his breath?
With experi-mints!
Report
Where do math teachers like to go on vacation?
Times Square!
Report
Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet?
Because they keep getting lost at C.
Report
Why did the girl do her homework on an airplane?
To achieve a higher education.
Report
What school requires you to drop out in order to graduate?
Sky diving school.
Report
David: "Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?"
Dan: "I don’t know. Why?"
David: "Because it was always sweeping during class!"
Report
T: Why can’t you work in an orange juice factory?
S: I don’t know. Why?
T: Because you can’t concentrate!
Report
Teacher: "Why did you eat your homework, Joe?"
Joe: "Because I don’t have a dog."
Report
Why were the students doing multiplication on the floor?
The teacher asked them not to use tables.
Report
An English teacher’s favorite breakfast?
Synonym rolls.
Report
Why did the kid run to school?
Because he was chased by the spelling bee.
Report
What do you call a square that's been in an accident?
A wrecktangle.
Report
What do you get when you cross a teacher and a vampire?
Lots of blood tests!
Report
What do they do on the first day of sheep school?
Have a baa-baa-cue.
Report
Why did the warlock had so much trouble with math?
He never knew WITCH equation to use.
Report
Why does a music teacher need a ladder?
To reach the high notes.
Report
What did the spider make online?
A website.
Report
What did the bully have for lunch?
A knuckle sandwich.
Report
What do you call a student with a dictionary in his pocket?
Smartie pants.
Report
How did the music teacher get locked out of her classroom?
Her keys were on the piano.
Report
A superhero in a computer class. The screen saver.
Report
Why do fireflies get bad grades at school?
Because they are not bright enough.
Report
How do you know that Saturn was married more than once?
Because it has many rings.
Report
What is a mathematical plant?
The one with square roots.
Report
What do ducks use for solving problems?
A quackulator!
Report
Which is the longest table in the math class?
The multiplication table.
Report
Which letter of the alphabet has the most water?
The “C.”
Report
Which building has the most stories?
The library!
Report
Why did the jellybean go to school?
To become a smartie!
Report
What does a book do in the winter?
Puts on a jacket.
Report
What should you grow in a school garden?
Human beans!
Report
What is the smartest insect?
A spelling bee.
Report
Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot?
It’s not right.
Report
Why did the bat miss the school bus?
Because he hung around for too long.
Report
How do you get straight A's?
By using a ruler.
Report
Stevie: "Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today!"
Mom: "That’s great. What in?"
Stevie: "A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling."
Report
Mike: What has given Mr. Bubbles nightmares since elementary school?
Josh: Beats me.
Mike: Pop quizzes!
Report
Why is history a sweet subject?
Because it has many dates.
Report
T: If you had 13 apples, 12 grapes, 3 pineapples and 3 strawberries, what would you have?
S: A delicious fruit salad.
Report
Why did Jimmy's grades drop after the holidays?
Because everything was marked down!
Report
What do you get when you cross a math teacher with a tree?
Arithma-sticks.
Report
What kind of teacher passes gas?
A tutor.
Report
What kind of math do owls like?
Owlgebra.
Report
What did the lobster do when the first day of school ended?
It shellabrated.
Report
What do you get when you throw a lot of books in the ocean?
A title wave.
Report
What did the buffalo say at school drop-off?
"Bison."
Report
What room can a student never enter?
A mushroom.
Report
What flies around the school at night?
An alpha-bat.
Report
The smartest letters of the alphabet - the Ys (wise).
Report
Which hand writes well, right or left?
None. A pen or a pencil writes well.
Report
What's an English teacher's favorite tree?
Poetree.
Report
A book never written: “The Best Subject in School”.
Report
What is yellow on the outside and gray on the inside?
A school bus full of elephants!
Report
What is white when its dirty and black when its clean?
A blackboard.
Report
Why did the Cyclops close his school?
Because he only had one pupil.
Report
Why do the students wear glasses during math class?
To improve their division.
Report
The reason why English teachers dislike parole - they like complete sentences.
Report
