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Dad Would Rather Sick Daughter Get Some Sleep Than Accomplish Her Dream, Takes Major Heat After
Bear looking through a window outside a house, relatable to girl with leukemia watching for bears every night.

Dad Would Rather Sick Daughter Get Some Sleep Than Accomplish Her Dream, Takes Major Heat After

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If you’re a parent, you’ve probably said yes to some wild requests, like building a cardboard rocket ship, hosting a tea party for 37 stuffed animals, or learning every character from Rugrats. Because when your kid looks up at you with those eyes, you just do it. Especially when you know their childhood won’t last forever.

That’s what makes this story hit so hard. Today’s Original Poster (OP) thought he was protecting his sick 10-year-old daughter by letting her rest, but in doing so, he missed the one thing she’d been hoping for during a tough time in her life. Afterwards, she refused to speak to him.

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    A parent’s worst fear just might be standing in the way of their child’s joy, but this dad just wanted his child to rest

    Brown bear resting on fallen log in forest, illustrating girl with leukemia watching for bears every night.

    Image credits: Ole Kloth / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    The author and his family were spending time at their cabin while repairs were being done at their house

    Father watches for bears at night to protect his girl with leukemia while she sleeps peacefully.

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    Girl with leukemia watches wildlife nightly from window seat, capturing photos while resting due to low energy.

    Girl with leukemia watching for bears at night by the window, hopeful to see one despite rarity in the area.

    Image credits: aitabear

    Young girl with leukemia holding a teddy bear, looking out the window, watching for bears every night with sadness.

    Image credits: sunnyn / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    One of his daughters has leukemia and can’t afford to do a lot of activity, so she resorted to sitting by a window to look at wildlife

    Alt text: Girl with leukemia watches for bears at night near cabin while dad notices two bears but lets her sleep

    Alt text: Girl with leukemia watches for bears at night while her dad lets her sleep despite seeing two bears nearby

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    Text excerpt from a story about a girl with leukemia watching for bears nightly, feeling devastated when none appear.

    Image credits: aitabear

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    Father comforting his upset daughter with leukemia as she watches for bears every night, showing care and concern at home.

    Image credits: prostock-studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Her goal was to see a bear, but one day she got back from chemo exhausted and fell asleep when two bears showed up

    Girl with leukemia watching for bears at night while her dad sees two but lets her sleep peacefully.

    Text excerpt showing a girl with leukemia refusing to sleep next to family, while her dad and wife discuss bears.

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    Text image showing a personal message about being upset with a wife and Rose, asking if the sender was rude.

    Image credits: aitabear

    Girl with leukemia holding teddy bear tightly, sitting outdoors in orange sweater on a sunny day.

    Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    His wife wanted to wake her up to see them, but he insisted that she had to sleep, so he took a picture of the bears on her iPad instead

    Comment discussing the impact on a girl with leukemia missing the chance to see bears, emphasizing apology and emotional effect.

    Text conversation discussing a girl with leukemia who watches for bears every night, and her dad sees two but lets her sleep.

    Screenshot of a social media comment suggesting arranging a bear meeting for a girl with leukemia to support her.

    Brown bear peering through a window outside a house, capturing a rare moment for a girl with leukemia watching for bears.

    Image credits: nationalparkservice / Instagram (not the actual photo)

    His daughter found out the next morning and was deeply upset, and netizens believe she has every right to be

    Girl with leukemia watching for bears at night, dad sees two bears but lets her sleep by the cabin window.

    Text on a white background about family visiting a national park, relating to girl with leukemia watching for bears nightly.

    Girl with leukemia watches for bears every night, feeling hopeful after seeing bears during park trips and late-night watches.

    Image credits: aitabear

    In an update, the author mentioned that his wife went back to the cabin with the daughter, and she was able to see even more bears this time

    The OP and his wife took their five kids to a remote cabin while their house underwent repairs. It wasn’t just a vacation, it was a much-needed change of scenery for their 10-year-old daughter who is undergoing chemotherapy for leukemia. Since she didn’t have the energy for hikes or outdoor play like her siblings, she found comfort in a cozy window seat with a front-row view of wildlife.

    Her mission was to spot a bear; however, they were rare sightings, so for three weeks, every evening, she’d sit by the window and hope. Sometimes she’d even fall asleep there, still hoping for that bear moment. On one of the final nights at the cabin, the daughter had just returned from a draining round of chemo, and once again dozed off in her wildlife-watching post.

    That night, two bears happened to come around right outside the cabin. The OP saw them and quickly called his wife over, snapping a photo with their daughter’s iPad. His wife wanted to wake her, but he thought her rest was more important. The next morning, the OP told the daughter about the bear visit and showed her the picture. When she asked if he woke her, he panicked and lied, saying yes.

    However, his wife, still bitter about the missed opportunity, told her it was the opposite. His daughter was devastated and deleted the photo, saying it didn’t count. Her anger ran deep—so deep she refused to talk to him, even refusing to sleep next to him as she used to during her illness. His wife sided with their daughter, now talking about taking her back to the cabin for a redo.

    To better understand the emotional fallout from a moment that seemed small on the surface but clearly shook the daughter’s trust in her father, Bored Panda spoke to marriage counselor Ronke Adesina, who unpacked the deeper layers behind decisions like these.

    When we asked what advice she gives to couples torn between prioritizing a child’s physical health versus emotional needs, she emphasized that parents shouldn’t frame it as a binary choice.

    Girl with leukemia watching for bears outside cabin in forest at dusk while her father looks on and children run nearby.

    Image credits: Ron Lach / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    “It doesn’t necessarily have to be either of them. It’s about defining what’s truly best in a holistic way,” she explained, adding that couples often fall into a ‘control versus compassion’ dynamic that undermines teamwork. Instead, she recommended the “bridge” strategy which entails meeting in the middle while keeping their child’s long-term well-being in focus.

    We also wanted to know how serious illness, such as childhood cancer, affects parenting decisions, to which Adesina responded, “It tends to split parents into survival roles.”

    She noted that one parent may become hyper-vigilant and controlling, while the other might cope by emotionally detaching or staying focused on logistics. The emotional weight of daily decisions can distort how each partner views the other, creating tension even in moments of good intent.

    Finally, we asked how the OP could begin repairing his relationship with his daughter after hurting her. “It could have been intentional or unintentional, but he needs to prioritize how his actions made her feel as opposed to his own intentions,” she explained.

    She advised giving the child space without withdrawing, acknowledging her pain directly, and focusing on ongoing repair, not just a one-time apology. “Rebuilding trust is a pattern, not a moment,” she added, encouraging parents to invite reconnection gently rather than push for immediate forgiveness.

    Netizens pointed out that the OP’s intentions, though possibly protective, didn’t justify the choice or the lie that followed. They insisted that he made the decision on behalf of his daughter while dismissing his wife’s suggestion as well. A few offered a more empathetic view, suggesting his concern for her health may have clouded his judgment.

    What do you think about this situation? If you were in the OP’s father’s shoes, would you have made the same decision, or woken her up? We would love to hear your thoughts!

    Comments from a dad about his daughter with leukemia watching for bears every night and his thoughtful surprises at home.

    Reddit comment expressing support and appreciation for a dad caring for his daughter with leukemia watching for bears.

    Text conversation about a girl with leukemia watching for bears at night, discussing her dad and bear sightings.

    Comment exchange about a dad missing a bear watching trip with his daughter who has leukemia, discussing family priorities.

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    Ifeoluwa Adesina

    Ifeoluwa Adesina

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a writer and bookworm (eyes glued to an e-book, more accurately) who happens to have a suspiciously deep knowledge about pop culture. When I'm not writing, I can most likely be found taking yet another online quiz to find out which soda matches my personality.

    Read less »
    Ifeoluwa Adesina

    Ifeoluwa Adesina

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a writer and bookworm (eyes glued to an e-book, more accurately) who happens to have a suspiciously deep knowledge about pop culture. When I'm not writing, I can most likely be found taking yet another online quiz to find out which soda matches my personality.

    What do you think ?
    Ellinor
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Biggest YTA I've ever seen. The poor girl is sick and she could d!e, her ONLY wish was to see a bear and OP ruined that for her.

    Shannon Donnelly
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did you read the update? Dad realized he f****d up by not waking his daughter up and more than made it up to her. If he had doubled down insisting that he was right, he would have been the a*****e. But he listened to everyone on Reddit and he made arrangement with his wife and FIL so that his kid got the opportunity to see some bears. He learned from his mistake. What more can you ask from the guy? That’s called good parenting in my book. Hoping for the best outcome for Rose ❤️

    Load More Replies...
    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd love to see a bear in the wild, but as I live in Australia the best I can manage is a visit to the local gay bar.

    Nova Rook
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like he messed up, learned from his mistake and rectified the situation. Daughter has now seen bears so all is good.

    Sue
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Until he makes more decisions for her that she should be able to make herself.

    Load More Replies...
    Billo66
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is NTA. He loves his daughter and wanted her to rest. She rode 7 hours and chemotherapy. I have Cancer. I get it. Chemo is horrible, nausea, weakness. He is scared for her life. It was a choice coming from love. That being said, I probably would have woken up my Daughter, depending on how sick she is. Sorry about your Daughter dude.

    Goth Mouse (he/they)
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can’t they take her to a safari park or wildlife rescue too to see bears if it’s her favourite animal?

    Atom Bohr
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I don't think it's a big deal" what is wrong with him that he wouldn't even second-guess himself when confronted by the reactions of 2 people he presumably loves, to the extent his daughter wasn't talking to him? Why do some people so utterly lack respect for the people they claim to love?

    Kelbers11
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I lived in Alaska the first half of my life, saw LOTS of bears, and still got excited af every time!

    Spacey Stacey
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's always time to sleep when you're d**d

    Sue
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder how he would feel if she died without ever seeing a bear. Sounds like even she knows bears are safer than men /s.

    Sarah Ellison
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The update was good but I noticed it didn't mention that dad actually APOLOGIZED to his daughter.

    Nova Rook
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does not look like the wife apologized to the husband either. Perhaps these were details that didn't make the edit.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    7 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I think the wife is a bigger AH. "Did you wake me up?" "Yeah, i.." "Oh, no. He wouldn't let anyone wake you up!" What exactly was the purpose of that, other than stirring the pot?

    Ellinor
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Biggest YTA I've ever seen. The poor girl is sick and she could d!e, her ONLY wish was to see a bear and OP ruined that for her.

    Shannon Donnelly
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did you read the update? Dad realized he f****d up by not waking his daughter up and more than made it up to her. If he had doubled down insisting that he was right, he would have been the a*****e. But he listened to everyone on Reddit and he made arrangement with his wife and FIL so that his kid got the opportunity to see some bears. He learned from his mistake. What more can you ask from the guy? That’s called good parenting in my book. Hoping for the best outcome for Rose ❤️

    Load More Replies...
    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd love to see a bear in the wild, but as I live in Australia the best I can manage is a visit to the local gay bar.

    Nova Rook
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like he messed up, learned from his mistake and rectified the situation. Daughter has now seen bears so all is good.

    Sue
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Until he makes more decisions for her that she should be able to make herself.

    Load More Replies...
    Billo66
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is NTA. He loves his daughter and wanted her to rest. She rode 7 hours and chemotherapy. I have Cancer. I get it. Chemo is horrible, nausea, weakness. He is scared for her life. It was a choice coming from love. That being said, I probably would have woken up my Daughter, depending on how sick she is. Sorry about your Daughter dude.

    Goth Mouse (he/they)
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can’t they take her to a safari park or wildlife rescue too to see bears if it’s her favourite animal?

    Atom Bohr
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I don't think it's a big deal" what is wrong with him that he wouldn't even second-guess himself when confronted by the reactions of 2 people he presumably loves, to the extent his daughter wasn't talking to him? Why do some people so utterly lack respect for the people they claim to love?

    Kelbers11
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I lived in Alaska the first half of my life, saw LOTS of bears, and still got excited af every time!

    Spacey Stacey
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's always time to sleep when you're d**d

    Sue
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder how he would feel if she died without ever seeing a bear. Sounds like even she knows bears are safer than men /s.

    Sarah Ellison
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The update was good but I noticed it didn't mention that dad actually APOLOGIZED to his daughter.

    Nova Rook
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does not look like the wife apologized to the husband either. Perhaps these were details that didn't make the edit.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    7 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I think the wife is a bigger AH. "Did you wake me up?" "Yeah, i.." "Oh, no. He wouldn't let anyone wake you up!" What exactly was the purpose of that, other than stirring the pot?

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