Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
Hubby Shuts Down Wife’s Plastic Surgery Plans, Says He Won’t Look After Her If She Changes Her Face
Plastic surgery has become an effortless way to touch up one’s appearance and make people feel better about the way they look. The problem with it being so easy is that folks might want to get many cosmetic procedures done even when they don’t need to.
This is what happened to a man’s wife who felt she needed to change her face to keep up with her sister and stepmom. The guy was so annoyed by his wife’s decision that he gave her an ultimatum.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Plastic surgery is not always the solution to a person’s self-esteem and mental health concerns
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that ever since his wife was young, she always compared herself to other girls, and began doing the same when her dad got a new wife
Image credits: fabrikasimf / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Recently, the poster’s sister-in-law got a cosmetic procedure done to keep up with their stepmom, so his wife also decided to get plastic surgery
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The poster didn’t want his wife to get the cosmetic procedure done and questioned her if she was only doing it because of her stepmom and sister
Image credits: CharacterAd1011
Since the man didn’t approve of his wife’s decision to get plastic surgery, he told her that if she went through with it, he wouldn’t look after her once it was done
When the woman’s dad left his 58-year-old wife for a lady who was just 2 years older than his daughter, this must have definitely brought up a lot of difficult feelings for her. It also seems like the woman had always been insecure about her background and looks because of the school she was put in and her stepmom.
The poster stated that for many years, his wife would keep comparing herself to her stepmom because the other woman had many qualities that she wanted. This might have brought up feelings of envy, which can sometimes be all-consuming and even affect a person’s mental health over time.
One day, the woman’s sister decided to get plastic surgery done, and after the procedure, she stated that she no longer felt uncomfortable around their stepmom. She made it seem like changing her appearance had improved her self-esteem and suddenly made her a more confident person.
According to studies, around 70% of young women and 60% of men consider plastic surgery as a way to deal with dissatisfaction about their looks or bodies. That’s also probably why the poster’s sister-in-law decided to go down that route, but he was shocked when his wife said she wanted to get a cosmetic procedure done as well.
Image credits: EmilyStock / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman wanted to get her face shape changed and was probably motivated by the confidence that her sister felt after her procedure. Unfortunately, the OP was not on board with the idea at all and told her that she had no reason to make such a drastic change. He didn’t seem to get how badly she wanted the work done on her appearance.
To put his foot down, the poster issued an ultimatum and told his wife that he wouldn’t take care of her if she went through with the surgery. He explained his decision by stating that her choice went against his principles, and he didn’t want to compromise on his beliefs just to enable her.
Even though it might seem noble to try and convince a loved one against undergoing plastic surgery, experts state that it’s important to actually respect their decision. Couples should talk about this idea at length so that they can both be on the same page with regard to this big choice.
Even though the poster’s intentions behind issuing the ultimatum to his wife were good, he was trying to impose his own beliefs on her. It’s possible that if they both calmly share their perspective with the other person, it might be easier to deal with this conflict and resolve it.
Do you think the man was right to assert his opinion about his wife’s plastic surgery idea? Let us know your honest thoughts on this matter.
Many folks felt that the man had overstepped by trying to control his wife’s decision to get a cosmetic procedure
Poll Question
Total votes ·
Thanks! Check out the results:
Total votes ·
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Kate Johnson 3 weeks ago
I'm sorry that's just pathetic. What that woman needs is therapy not plastic surgery. Her reasons for this are literally pathological, and anyone encouraging her to maim herself in the name of competing with her father's wife is as sick as she is. She's actually willing to disrespect her husband and make extra work for her family so she can be prettier for daddy? Bizarre. I would be concerned about my children being raised by someone this unstable and neurotic if I was the hubby and would insist on therapy to remain in the relationship.
FreeTheUnicorn 3 weeks ago
Recreational surgery is a huge risk to take when you have young kids that need you. Things like extreme sports are generally put on hold while kids are young, serious cosmetic surgery is statistically riskier that mountaineering or kiting etc it's not ok for one parent to take unnecessary risks with their health that could affect the whole family. When the kids are older, and a long recovery or incurred disability would still be a big deal, but easier coped with, it's a different conversation.
SkyBlueandBlack 3 weeks ago
Thank you. Yeah, what she wants is entirely recreational. Or call it performative. Surgery will not fix her self esteem. She'll end up wanting another thing "fixed", then another, and so on.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 3 weeks ago
Face shape is a huge thing to change. While it is her body, there's a good chance, even ignoring unnecessary medical risks and something going wrong, it will have a serious impact on her husband's attraction to her. I would be crushed if my partner's face changed that much. And while if he wanted it, I don't think it would be my place to stop him, I would definitely have the conversation about that risk, just as I'd have the conversation about medical risk. It's one thing if there's an accident, but I love his face so much, if he changed it, I'd be hugely disappointed and reminded every time I saw him.
The Other Guest 3 weeks ago
90% of the comments selected by the "writer" are just: Reader - "What's the surgery?" OP - "I don't know, she wants to change the shape of her face." Yes, I'm exaggerating there, but it does make for a dull read.
Asri 3 weeks ago
I swear most of the AITA posts involve people who don't actually discuss things with their partner/friend/family member. If she won't even tell him what she wants to do (likely something like cheek implants and/or nose job), they have some serious trust issues. They both need therapy.
Tabitha 3 weeks ago (edited)
I’m 64, and even when I was young I was not a beauty. The best I could do was “kinda cute, really smart and funny”. Well, I took what I was given and ran with it—-and I never lacked for a date, with smart and successful, and often exciting, men who didn’t just want arm candy but someone they could have a real conversation with and relate to. So believe me, you do not have to look like whatever the ideal of beauty is at that moment. Just make the most you can out of what you’ve got, and add some valuable intrinsic qualities to the mix, and I guarantee you will do very well in life. Better than the beauties who skated along on nothing but their looks. You will remain attractive as you age because you spent time developing ALL of yourself, inside and out. So when the wrinkles start appearing, you will have your intelligence and wit to enhance your appearance all the more, while the beauties fall apart, seek massive amounts of cosmetic surgery, and all start looking alike with their tight and expressionless Mar-a-lago faces.
Roberta Surprenant 3 weeks ago
Truly ethical surgeons require potential patients to go through therapy first, just so they relize changing appearances won't change life.
Lady Eowyn 3 weeks ago
Therapy first. Then surgery. This woman sounds like she's just insecure. Changing her face won't fix that.
J R 3 weeks ago
YTA. OP doesn't need to like the surgery, but refusing to take care of his wife afterward is like punishing her for making a decision he doesn't like. "In sickness and in health" until he's unhappy about the reason she's recovering, then he abandons her.
Alexandra 3 weeks ago
In this case the sickness is self-inflicted: I think the 'sickness' in the wedding vows refers to the kind of sickness that happens to you, not the ones you chose.
Load More Replies...
Janelle Collard 3 weeks ago
Rarely do I agree with the YTAers but in this case, I do. It's *her* body, so *her* choice. HOWEVER, I agree - she needs therapy FIRST. From the way OP describes it, she's been unhappy with her looks for awhile + new stepmommy being close to wife's age + "better-looking" is also affecting wife's judgment. In adition to therapy, I hope wife *and* OP meet with the plastic surgeon(s) who will explain what the procedure is, how long recovery is, etc. Then - hopefully! - OP will be more supportive to his wife having surgery and will care for her.
Alexandra 3 weeks ago
I just wonder: if you don't have any kind of say in someone else's decision, are you still responsible for the consequences of that choice?
Load More Replies...
Kate Johnson 3 weeks ago
I'm sorry that's just pathetic. What that woman needs is therapy not plastic surgery. Her reasons for this are literally pathological, and anyone encouraging her to maim herself in the name of competing with her father's wife is as sick as she is. She's actually willing to disrespect her husband and make extra work for her family so she can be prettier for daddy? Bizarre. I would be concerned about my children being raised by someone this unstable and neurotic if I was the hubby and would insist on therapy to remain in the relationship.
FreeTheUnicorn 3 weeks ago
Recreational surgery is a huge risk to take when you have young kids that need you. Things like extreme sports are generally put on hold while kids are young, serious cosmetic surgery is statistically riskier that mountaineering or kiting etc it's not ok for one parent to take unnecessary risks with their health that could affect the whole family. When the kids are older, and a long recovery or incurred disability would still be a big deal, but easier coped with, it's a different conversation.
SkyBlueandBlack 3 weeks ago
Thank you. Yeah, what she wants is entirely recreational. Or call it performative. Surgery will not fix her self esteem. She'll end up wanting another thing "fixed", then another, and so on.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 3 weeks ago
Face shape is a huge thing to change. While it is her body, there's a good chance, even ignoring unnecessary medical risks and something going wrong, it will have a serious impact on her husband's attraction to her. I would be crushed if my partner's face changed that much. And while if he wanted it, I don't think it would be my place to stop him, I would definitely have the conversation about that risk, just as I'd have the conversation about medical risk. It's one thing if there's an accident, but I love his face so much, if he changed it, I'd be hugely disappointed and reminded every time I saw him.
The Other Guest 3 weeks ago
90% of the comments selected by the "writer" are just: Reader - "What's the surgery?" OP - "I don't know, she wants to change the shape of her face." Yes, I'm exaggerating there, but it does make for a dull read.
Asri 3 weeks ago
I swear most of the AITA posts involve people who don't actually discuss things with their partner/friend/family member. If she won't even tell him what she wants to do (likely something like cheek implants and/or nose job), they have some serious trust issues. They both need therapy.
Tabitha 3 weeks ago (edited)
I’m 64, and even when I was young I was not a beauty. The best I could do was “kinda cute, really smart and funny”. Well, I took what I was given and ran with it—-and I never lacked for a date, with smart and successful, and often exciting, men who didn’t just want arm candy but someone they could have a real conversation with and relate to. So believe me, you do not have to look like whatever the ideal of beauty is at that moment. Just make the most you can out of what you’ve got, and add some valuable intrinsic qualities to the mix, and I guarantee you will do very well in life. Better than the beauties who skated along on nothing but their looks. You will remain attractive as you age because you spent time developing ALL of yourself, inside and out. So when the wrinkles start appearing, you will have your intelligence and wit to enhance your appearance all the more, while the beauties fall apart, seek massive amounts of cosmetic surgery, and all start looking alike with their tight and expressionless Mar-a-lago faces.
Roberta Surprenant 3 weeks ago
Truly ethical surgeons require potential patients to go through therapy first, just so they relize changing appearances won't change life.
Lady Eowyn 3 weeks ago
Therapy first. Then surgery. This woman sounds like she's just insecure. Changing her face won't fix that.
J R 3 weeks ago
YTA. OP doesn't need to like the surgery, but refusing to take care of his wife afterward is like punishing her for making a decision he doesn't like. "In sickness and in health" until he's unhappy about the reason she's recovering, then he abandons her.
Alexandra 3 weeks ago
In this case the sickness is self-inflicted: I think the 'sickness' in the wedding vows refers to the kind of sickness that happens to you, not the ones you chose.
Load More Replies... Janelle Collard 3 weeks ago
Rarely do I agree with the YTAers but in this case, I do. It's *her* body, so *her* choice. HOWEVER, I agree - she needs therapy FIRST. From the way OP describes it, she's been unhappy with her looks for awhile + new stepmommy being close to wife's age + "better-looking" is also affecting wife's judgment. In adition to therapy, I hope wife *and* OP meet with the plastic surgeon(s) who will explain what the procedure is, how long recovery is, etc. Then - hopefully! - OP will be more supportive to his wife having surgery and will care for her.
Alexandra 3 weeks ago
I just wonder: if you don't have any kind of say in someone else's decision, are you still responsible for the consequences of that choice?
Load More Replies... You May Like Obvious Signs Someone Is Jealous Of You Man Struggles To Accept ‘New Wife’ After Plastic Surgery, Gets Honest When She Asks Him What He Thinks Woman Excludes Her Daughter-In-Law For Years Then Acts Surprised When She Goes No-Contact
Larysa Perih
Shelly Fourer
Mindaugas Balčiauskas
Related on Bored Panda
30
19