Person Agrees To Let Roommates Have Their BFs Move In, But Makes It Clear They Won’t Share Their Bathroom

One of the perks of living with roommates is paying less rent. But it also means sharing your space with others, and that can lead to problems you never bargained for.

For one Redditor, this had never been an issue. They rent a large room in a shared house, complete with a private bathroom they pay extra for. It was the perfect setup—until recently, when more people, along with some partners, moved in.

The Redditor is non-binary and was assigned male at birth, and now a few roommates are insisting their boyfriends should be allowed to use the private bathroom, arguing it’s more convenient than the shared one. But they don’t want to give it up.

Read the full story below.

This nonbinary tenant pays $200 extra for a private bathroom in a shared house

Nonbinary person sitting with roommates in a sunlit room, reading and writing at a wooden table with books and papers.

Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

But their roommates insist their boyfriends should be entitled to it as well

Text post from a nonbinary person explaining their private bathroom in a shared house with roommates.

Nonbinary person setting boundaries with roommates’ boyfriends over use of private bathroom inside shared living space.

Text excerpt from a nonbinary person explaining roommate and boyfriend living arrangements and bathroom use boundaries.

Nonbinary person sitting on couch with fluffy pillow, expressing refusal to share private bathroom with roommates’ boyfriends

Image credits: Antoni Shkraba Studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Nonbinary person sets boundaries with roommates’ boyfriends over private bathroom use inside shared living space.

Text excerpt discussing nonbinary person setting boundaries about roommates’ boyfriends using private bathroom inside their room.

Text excerpt from a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use their private bathroom, expressing discomfort with compromises.

Nonbinary person wearing glasses sitting by window, writing in notebook with laptop nearby in a sunlit room.

Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Text of a nonbinary person setting a firm boundary about their private bathroom and dealing with roommates' reactions.

Text post about nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use private bathroom in their room.

Image credits: Ambitious_Jelly9962

Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

How to have a good relationship with your roommates

In day-to-day life, most people seem to have a handle on basic social skills, common sense, and hygiene. But start living together under one roof, and suddenly it’s like those qualities only exist in books or movies.

Rooming with others is always a bit of a lottery. Over the years, I’ve shared homes with people who could be described as both nightmare fuel and absolute angels. And yet, I’ve learned that—unless things are truly unbearable—it’s usually possible to build a good relationship. It just takes patience, effort, and, occasionally, a little confrontation.

June Homes offers some solid advice on roommate etiquette, and many of their tips match my own experience.

First and foremost: communicate. In a shared living situation, discussing preferences, boundaries, and pet peeves early on can save you a lot of headaches later. If there’s something important you want others to know, whether it’s your cleaning routine or your “don’t touch my food” rule, say it upfront rather than letting resentment build.

Expect disagreements. They’re bound to happen sooner or later. One way to keep them from escalating is to hold regular house meetings. These can be a chance to air concerns, plan events, or just make sure everyone’s on the same page. It’s simple, but it works.

Keep shared spaces clean. You’d think this would be obvious, but it’s one of the biggest sources of tension in shared homes. Some households swear by strict cleaning schedules, while others take a looser approach. Either way, clean up after yourself, especially in the kitchen.

Respect personal space. This should go without saying, yet here we are discussing a story where roommates think it’s fine to use someone else’s private bathroom located inside their bedroom. That’s a hard no. Invading someone’s personal space is uncomfortable for everyone, and it’s basic respect to avoid it.

Don’t overlook safety and security. It’s easy to skip this conversation until something goes wrong, but it’s worth setting clear rules from the start. Discuss what to do in an emergency: create a contact list, decide on a meeting spot, and go over evacuation procedures. Whether it’s a lockout, a fire, or a flood, you’ll be glad you planned ahead.

Roommates aren’t always easy, but when you do find ways to get along, the experience can be genuinely rewarding. Instead of just sharing a home, you might end up with real friends and a collection of memories you’ll look back on fondly.

The author shared more details in the comments

Comment discussing a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use the private bathroom inside their room.

Screenshot of an online discussion about a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use their private bathroom.

Comment discussing nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends access to private bathroom inside their room.

Reddit conversation about nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use private bathroom inside their room.

Conversation about nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends use of private bathroom in shared living space.

Readers overwhelmingly agreed they shouldn’t have to share their bathroom with anyone

Comment from a nonbinary person explaining why roommates’ boyfriends should not use their private bathroom inside their room.

Comment discussing a nonbinary person refusing to share their private bathroom with roommates’ boyfriends in a housing conflict.

Screenshot of an online comment advising a nonbinary person to get a bedroom door lock to prevent unauthorized bathroom use.

Screenshot of an online discussion where a nonbinary person defends their private bathroom rights against roommates’ boyfriends.

Screenshot of an online comment supporting a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends access to their private bathroom.

Screenshot of a forum comment discussing nonbinary person refusing to let roommates’ boyfriends use private bathroom inside their room.

Text comment on a discussion board about roommates and private bathroom use, mentioning couples saving money by sharing rooms.

Screenshot of Reddit comment discussing a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends use of private bathroom.

Screenshot of an online comment defending a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends access to their private bathroom.

Comment from compguru1 discussing setting boundaries about roommates’ boyfriends using a private bathroom.

Comment discussing a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use the private bathroom in their room.

Commenter named Wide_Comment3081 responding to a private bathroom dispute involving a nonbinary person and roommates.

Comment about bathroom privacy and usage, featuring a nonbinary person setting boundaries with roommates’ boyfriends.

Screenshot of a user commenting about a nonbinary person refusing to let roommates’ boyfriends use their private bathroom.

Screenshot of a forum comment discussing a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use a private bathroom.

Text comment on a forum discussing a nonbinary person refusing to let roommates’ boyfriends use their private bathroom.

Comment discussing nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends access to private bathroom inside their room.

Alt text: Comment discussing nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use private bathroom inside their room

Comment discussing privacy and bathroom use rights related to a nonbinary person and roommates’ boyfriends.

Later, they posted an update on how the situation was unfolding

Text post about a nonbinary person refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use their private bathroom in a shared living space.

Text excerpt showing a nonbinary person discussing bathroom use conflicts with roommates’ boyfriends inside their private room.

Alt text: Nonbinary person standing firm about private bathroom use amid roommate conflicts over boyfriends accessing it.

Image credits: Ambitious_Jelly9962

In a final follow-up, they said some temporary boundaries had been set

Nonbinary person frustrated, holding head in hands while dealing with roommates’ boyfriends using private bathroom conflict.

Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Nonbinary person standing firm about roommates’ boyfriends not using private bathroom inside their room.

Text message about setting boundaries with roommates regarding private bathroom use inside their room.

Text on a white background stating setting boundaries about private space and refusing roommates’ boyfriends to use a private bathroom.

Image credits: Ambitious_Jelly9962

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