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People Are Sharing The Exact Moment They Discovered They Were Being Cheated On (30 Tweets)
There are many ways to mess up a romantic relationship, but cheating is arguably the fastest one. It destroys trust and can cause deep emotional pain for those affected. While some couples may be able to work through the issue and salvage their connection, for many, the damage is too great to rebuild.
Recently, online content creator Aliyah's Interlude tweeted a question, asking people: "What's the craziest way you've found out your partner was cheating on you?" and whether it was the desire to normalize their past, shame their (ex) significant other, or simply warn others, many responded with their experiences.
Image credits: aliyahInterlude
Continue scrolling to read the ones we think are the most memorable. Hopefully, the popularity of this thread will remind at least one conflicted person that instead of secret hedonistic adventures, honesty is the way to go.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Soozie Poozie 3 years ago
I did the same thing... one morning, after getting back from a trip out of country with my sister, I woke up and just KNEW (in my gut) that my boyfriend (of 8 years) had cheated on me. He admitted it when I confronted him about it. Before that, while I was away, I also suddenly got a gut feeling that he was doing something wrong. I even wrote in my travel journal, "He better not be making a fool out of me." I told myself that I was being silly, and that he would never do that to me. My gut knew better.
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Shyla Bouche 3 years ago
Truth. I can't begin to tell all the dikcs around, just looking for a warm place to go.
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Wayne Reynolds 3 years ago
Anyone who's honest with themselves KNOOOOOOW Holly...you know...like some of us never married single men. Us men know what you women be like.
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robin aldrich 3 years ago
The old "I didn't mean to... my penis just fell onto her vagina" excuse?
Lauren Caswell 3 years ago
Or cues in recent conversations, especially if skyping/zooming. Brain, left to think at night...connections get made?
deanna woods 3 years ago
"I didn't mean to" is the most ridiculous excuse that can ever be said to explain cheating.
SpookyPanda 3 years ago
Oooh, that’s some insane intuition right there! Once, my ex-BF went to another state for Thanksgiving to visit a friend. I surprised him at the airport to welcome him back home (back when you could meet them at the gate). The moment I saw him walking out of the loading bridge, I just knew.
RELATED:
#2
Edda Kamphues 3 years ago
My husband dumped me after 20 years and two kids. Via text message. Two days before Christmas. Great guy.
DuchessDegu 3 years ago
On the bright side you got rid of a huge arsehole and are free to meet a very nice person!
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Jennifer Hamlin 3 years ago
My sister was the woman who discovered he had a zillion girlfriends and texted them all. A bunch of them got together for lunch. She's still close friends with one.
Mark Fuller 3 years ago
Morals aside, what a logistically nightmare! The stress alone would kill my libido!
deanna woods 3 years ago (edited)
I barely have time for myself, let alone thirteen other people.
According to research, cheating is rarely a simple affair. There are many reasons why people become unfaithful, and the patterns are more complex than common stereotypes suggest. A fascinating study from 2021 sheds some light on these motivations.
The investigation included 495 people (87.9 percent of whom identified as heterosexual), who were recruited through a participant pool at a large U.S. university and through relationship-related Reddit message boards.
The participants admitted to cheating in their relationship and answered the question at the root of the mystery: why did you do it? An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance. These motivations not only influenced why people cheated but how long they did so, their sexual enjoyment, their emotional investment in the affair, and whether their primary relationship ended because of it.
#3
Couldnt_find_a_decent_name 3 years ago
Right, like good job mom, she def knew lol
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Pacaka 3 years ago
What about mother in law is deliberate planting doubt , because she never actually liked son's wife?
Moosy Girl 3 years ago (edited)
Haha that was my first thought too but I didn’t dare write it here, we must be evil!
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Cerridwen 3 years ago
I don't get it? If the shirt was in his moms house and he didn't own it then it was someone else in his moms house. Not something to do with his wife/partner??
Johnette Pace 3 years ago
He either lived with his mom or mom would come over to help him clean. Mom gave gf another girls shirt. Whether it was an intentional heads up that her son was cheating on her I dunno
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#4
MrsFettesVette 3 years ago
Nurses are always looking out for their patients
Load More Replies... Fish Fingers 3 years ago
My wife is a midwife. She once told me about a guy who's wife and girlfriend were both on the unit giving birth at the same time... and neither of them new about the other.
Angie Taylor 3 years ago
It’s really sad, but experienced OB nurses have seen some s**t. Our patients are our #1 priority and we will do everything we can to support them. I am sure the nurse spent a bit of time thinking through what was best for the patient. It likely took some restraint not to kick his out when she caught him. I can only imagine how embarrassing this was for this new mama. :(
Old Roadie 3 years ago
Hey ...just wanted to thank you for being an OB nurse. You and your wonderful counterparts are heroic, veritable bastions of serenity and support. All my granddaughters gave birth in December (?!) and each OB nurse made their positive experiences possible.
Load More Replies... Old Roadie 3 years ago
I was 8 months pregnant. Drove to Camp Pendleton to surprise him. PFC on duty told me he just left with his wife and family.
StarlightPanda! 3 years ago
You've gotta be a really horrible person to do something like that while your wife/girlfriend just gave birth.
Your Neighborhood Alien 3 years ago
The apparently left out the last part of the tweet (no idea how they even do that!) that says, "He was cheating since the begi-"
#5
CouchChihuahua 3 years ago
Next thing ya know, he also happened to take the exact some photo with the exact same clothes and the exact same haircut in the exact same place!
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OhBlahDi OhBlahDa 3 years ago
What kind of fool doesn't even know his partner's best friend that he swipes right on her???? Such a punk.
Though most cheating involves sex, it is rarely just about the act itself. Most participants felt some form of emotional attachment to their affair partner, but it was significantly more common in those who reported suffering from neglect or lack of love in their primary relationship.
Around two-thirds of participants (62.8 percent) admitted they felt affection toward their new partner. About the same proportion (61.2 percent) engaged in sexually explicit dialogue with them. Roughly 4 out of 10 (37.6 percent) had intimate conversations, while 1 in 10 (11.1 percent) said, “I love you.”
Those who reported feeling less connected to their primary partner experienced greater emotional intimacy in the affair, which might be a way of fulfilling that need. Additionally, when infidelity was linked to a lack of love, individuals found the experience more intellectually and emotionally satisfying.
#6
Adam Leviness 3 years ago
Is this person sure THEY'RE not the side piece? You generally don't take the person you're just sleeping with on a trip to DW with your daughter?
#7
shermes 3 years ago
You found an open box of condoms IN THE GLOVE BOX! I think someone wanted to be found out cuz no kind of stupid would do that and think they wouldn’t be caught.
CV Vir 3 years ago
Also: the heat in the car on warm days is going to make them fail eventually.
Load More Replies... thatlesbiantacocat 3 years ago
Ah, yes, just ya know holding condoms for a friend? Like how does that work?
Tess 3 years ago
My ex tried the same excuse. It didn't work out well for him.
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Couldnt_find_a_decent_name 3 years ago
At least if you’re gonna make excuses, make them believable (not that you should cheat on your partner in the first place)
Craig Becker 3 years ago
“Holding them for a friend” - this is a common lie used by teenagers when their parents find drugs on them. I’ve never really understood what the point of it was.
#8
Christina R 3 years ago
My ex was using his car to cheat on me with someone out of state (he said he was visiting his parents). Turns out he got a ton of expensive (Boston) parking tickets which he ripped up and never paid. A few years later, after we broke up, I was driving through Connecticut (which exchanges info with Massachusetts) and I was arrested and thrown in jail for an outstanding warrant due to the unpaid parking tickets. On the 4th of July. The judge who had to approve my bail was at a BBQ getting drunk. I was in jail most of the day. My ex is an asshat.
Bleble BlebleBla 3 years ago
Bro, I was done reading at "I got sick from stress so he went out", WTF!
Wayne Reynolds 3 years ago
That's the kind of guy that makes all guys look bad. Let him keep using the car next time. Maybe for some inexplicable reason the breaks fail or the wheels come off...or both. On a twisty mountain road with no other traffic around.
#9
juice 3 years ago
he was cheating on his fiancée with OP, who didn't know. according to Twitter they both left after yelling at him though
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Participants' satisfaction with sex differed depending on the reason for their affair. People reported feeling more sexually fulfilled when they cheated because of desire, lack of love, or a need for variety. Much of the sexual activity was limited to kissing (86.7 percent) and cuddling (72.9 percent). Interestingly, the study found that only half of the cheaters reported having vaginal intercourse.
The reason for the infidelity also had a great impact on its length. In some cases, the relationship was a brief tryst, while others were a longer and deeper attachment. Those who cheated because of anger (such as a wish to “seek revenge”), lack of love, or need for variety had a longer affair, while those motivated by the situation (such as those who were “drunk” or “overwhelmed” and “not thinking clearly”) ended it sooner. Women also had longer affairs, on average, than men.
#10
Alexej Dvorak 3 years ago (edited)
Well, I don't want to enter the general discussion why people cheat at all, but why in all sanity would you cheat with somebody you know will rat you out?!
IcyPenguinToes 3 years ago
People are more likely to cheat with another person also in a relationship so that they both have something to lose... 😔
Load More Replies... Katrina Marie 3 years ago
They must have a close circle of friends because she had enough info of hers to reach her on a cash app and have her number initially. She might have found out she was the other woman and got as much info as she could before she told him she knew.
Afro Duckler 3 years ago
Some credit for the blocking thing, but the discredit out weighs it 10 fold
#11
#12
NotTodaySatan!! 3 years ago
I don't understand what the phone type had to do with this... elp!
Fluffy Griffin 3 years ago
Maybe with that phone it doesn't show him that everyone can see who is in the group message, like newer phones do.
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MelFunction 3 years ago
I need to know more.... Did he realise? What did he say? What did they say?
#13
That Bi Book Lover 3 years ago
The man literally has room-temperature IQ. And I mean that in Celcius.
Kris92 3 years ago
I'm thinking more like he's owed some IQ. Like, he hid behind the door when it was his turn to get it.
Load More Replies... Old Roadie 3 years ago (edited)
Found a stack of pics and letters in his seabag after return from VN. I made a fire. Gave him the ashes. He was so mad I nearly feared for my life, yelling about how was he supposed to find her again. What? We'd been married a couple years with a child.
debrina blackmoon 3 years ago (edited)
Well...they were just random on tv /in movies, right???/s Not nec. porn but, whatever.
Brazen 3 years ago
Since it's a thread about catching cheaters, I'm going to assume that he showed her pictures of girls he was sleeping with.
Load More Replies...In the end, only a third of participants ultimately admitted to their primary partner that they were cheating on them. Women were more inclined to fess up than men. Also, those who came clean were more likely to have cheated out of anger or neglect rather than sexual desire or variety. This suggests that their confession could have been a form of retribution and a way to exact revenge instead of a way to clear their conscience. The participants who confessed were more likely to form a committed relationship with the affair partner, too.
#14
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 3 years ago
Even if it was past tense, once the comparisons start, it's over. You are your own person.
Lisa H 3 years ago
It is a red flag, though. He's trying to deflect instead of just answering her question.
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Old Roadie 3 years ago
Been there. Got weird urge to go to house in another area of town, miles from our home. House was for rent. His bike was out front. I knocked on the door and heard him cursing 'how do you do this!#%^' Intuition, baby.
NotTodaySatan!! 3 years ago
Why would any partner stroll up to a house where your other half could actually be working? They must have had some indication that is what they were doing there, otherwise, he needed to run anyway. Geez.
Kathy 3 years ago
Male model on underwear shoot? Private Fitness Instructor? FBI? CIA? Undercover cop on a stakeout? Salesman demonstrating the latest body cream for customer? And the list of excuses goes on and on... and on...
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Angie Taylor 3 years ago
That’s horrible. It feels like this mom was almost proud that her son…texting this sort of message at 2 a.m. to a teenage girl is immature and cruel. It def could have been handled differently.
bears. beets. battlestar galactica. 3 years ago
by the sound of his mother, she definitely dodged a bullet!!!
#17
DrBronxx 3 years ago
I'm a little confused - this is a really s****y situation, but how is it proof that he was cheating?
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago (edited)
She didn't get a sexually-transmitted venereal disease from the aether, that's for sure. If she had no other sexual partners before or after said boyfriend, HE had chlamydia and lied/transmitted it to her.
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Rosie Red 3 years ago
I found out my ex-horror was cheating on me because I contracted HPV. Of course he denied it, but I couldn't have gotten it any other way. I went to the gyno and she said I might have what looked like pre-cancerous cells. On two occasions, after a positive pap test, bits of my cervix needed to be snipped out. And yes, it effing hurt, not to mention the fear, stress and cost of a divorce lawyer.
D. Pitbull 3 years ago
YUP... that's... a really... terrible way to find out. It's like Hm... both clean when getting into relationship... clean... clean... suddenly... you go for a yearly physical and... "Pardon me. What did you say I have?" - you know YOU'VE been faithful... Even worse - he tries to play it off as if it must have just 'spontaneously occurred' from nowhere. Uh huh... yeah... that's not how it works.
tara 3 years ago
Why all the hate for lynne hammar? That was kinda funny....I am so baffled by the things that get down voted. I once read a post about things in the workplace, and someone posted a rude note on their desk that they don't care about coworkers weekends or kids so don't bother making small talk with them. I mentioned they sounded like a fun person to spend the day with..BAM 84000000 downvotes.
Jonni Schneider 3 years ago
Yea but chlamydia is only transferred sexually. If you were clear of it earlier, you got it from him. Don't be stupid girl. Wise up.
So does an affair really end a relationship? Ultimately, the fate of the participants' primary relationship depended less on the act itself and more on what motivated it.
Cheating was more likely to end a relationship when it arose from anger, lack of love, low commitment, or neglect and it was less likely to do so when the infidelity was circumstantial.
Surprisingly, only one in five (20.4 percent) of relationships ended because of the affair. The same number of couples (21.8 percent) stayed together despite their primary partner finding out, while slightly more (28.3 percent) stayed together without their partner discovering their infidelity. The remaining relationships broke up for other reasons.
#19
all 4 paws 3 years ago
Craziest lie ever, not even a bullet dodged, whole a*s firing squad dodged
juice 3 years ago
i think it's a Snapchat feature you can enable that'll show your friends your general location?
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#21
NotTodaySatan!! 3 years ago
This one doesn't necessarily say "cheating" either. Maybe she does act like he's out with other girls and is trying to make her own behavior seem he overreacted to an innocent question.
naturespocket 3 years ago
if “i’m not cheating” is the answer to a question that’s not about cheating…it’s cheating
Load More Replies... naturespocket 3 years ago
anytime the answer is “i’m not cheating” when the question wasn’t even about cheating….HES CHEATING
#22
#23
Old Roadie 3 years ago
Your intuition knows. It will find a way to enlighten you, despite best efforts to remain blissfully ignorant.
Adam Leviness 3 years ago
I haven't ever cheated on my wife and I love her more than anyone. But she's woken me up in the middle of the night at LEAST 4 times to yell at me for cheating on her in a dream lol Intuition isn't ALWAYS right. But, I've had that creeping feeling with several past partners and it was right those times. The first gf I had I tried to ignore it as paranoia and ended up finding out she was sleeping with a LOT of different guys later on.
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Osprey 3 years ago
I found out the same way once. I had a dream that a guy I was dating was with another girl. Next time I talked to him I said "hey I had a weird dream, are you seeing someone else?" He was like "woah, ...um yeah". I was like "ok, see ya around then" and he said "Its been real. See ya". Never heard from him again.
#24
#25
Xenia Harley 3 years ago
Had a dream years ago too about someone cheating on me. It was true, too!
#26
OmBoyGanesh 3 years ago
If that scares you, the median age of initial sexual activity with a partner is 15.6.
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Jonni Schneider 3 years ago
All sorta sad. So glad I'll never be a teen again. Just cruel, evil, mean people.
#27
Brazen 3 years ago
That means nothing on Spotify though unless he kept his playlists private...which I am not sure is even a thing. They suggest random strangers playlists for me all the time on there.
Jose Antonio 3 years ago
my goodness...if you consider this as proof... you must not be very bright. Playlist are set as public by default. anyone looking up any song, artist or album of included songs can see that playlist...
Natalie Seaton 2 years ago
Awwww. Making a mixed tape for each other is still a ting with todays middleschoolers, how cute.
#28
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
Bending over... to give a BJ? Bending over to take it in the heiny? :/ Or is "bending" some new slang word I'm too old to be hip to? XD Ah - I checked Urban Dictionary: "In addition, bending can sometimes also allude to acts of over-the-top homosexual behaviour or indulgence, as in the British slang noun "bender" or adjective "bent.""
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Clown fish 3 years ago (edited)
Cool the ex is friends with Bender Bending Rodríguez. Is the ex Fry
Bender Bending Rodríguez 3 years ago (edited)
I don't know this guy and Fry won't cheat.
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The voice of reason 3 years ago
Thanks for the explanation. I’m way beyond knowing some of these slang meanings.
#29
Totally happy Panda 3 years ago
With you there. I actually want to understand what this means
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MrsFettesVette 3 years ago
Yeah I don't see how this means someone's cheating
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Narwhal Blast 3 years ago
That sounds like a marketing strategy, not like cheating. A bad one, but I don't see the cheating?
Rosecrucian Roeth 3 years ago
Don/t feel bad YSDNWTF, I have no idea what that is nor what it means:(
#30
Marivali 3 years ago
This is kind of what happened to me. With this loser for 6 years on and off. Met him at my place after a few drinks with friends for my Birthday. He had been cleaning up, found and read my therapy diary from a few years ago. I had written something about a fling I had when we were broken up for a year. He accused me of cheating - we were on a break! - and broke up with me. On my Birthday. Checked his FB page a few days later to see he's updated his relationship status to 'in a relationship' with someone else since April. My Birthday is at the end of May. Jerk.
Slarty Bartfast 3 years ago (edited)
When my wife's phone received an audible message notification at around 11-12pm, and when I picked up the phone (without looking at it - simply to pass it to her) her guilty, slightly panicked reaction gave her away entirely. Turned out she'd been seeing a mutual friend behind my back for some time.
Nahkaparturi X 2 years ago
Jesus Christ, what's the matter with these stories. Half of them make no sense at all ...
naturespocket 3 years ago
i have a coworker who is stalker-level obsessed with a streamer they mod for…soo yeah that would be concerning
#32
Fish Fingers 3 years ago
Do these people not speak English? I genuinely don't understand what half these posts are saying.
Cyber Returns 3 years ago
His waves (His group/crew) logo was her twitter header (banner at the top of her twitter page)
Dre Mosley 3 years ago
"Waves" as in his wavy hair. A pic of her man's wavy hair was the other woman's Twitter header photo. That's what she's saying.
Kirsti Tuers 3 years ago
That's exactly what I thought too. But I think we're wrong
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What do you think ?
Samara Morgan 2 years ago
Most likely some of them aren't even from an English speaking country, the rest is propably American ;)
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Julie Ann Al buzbeba 3 years ago
With my BD for 7 years....I had heard he had reconnected with his old HS girlfriend on FB...who I had always felt he had never gotten over. She caused him MAJOR heartbreak. I started feeling like maybe they were talking to each other more often than the occasional 'like' on FB posts. Just a feeling. One night when I was at work on break, we got into a major fight TEXTING about it on the phone where he kept denying everything and telling me I was totally crazy. Back and forth we texted, and then I got this text from him..."Just told her we were talking again...at least she knows now" It took me a second to realize he must have been texting her at the same time he was texting me...and had texted me a message to her on accident. I wrote back "Well if I wasn't sure before, I sure am now!" He tried to tell me he had written that text to me as a joke...to see how I would react. Stayed with him stupidly for 2 more months, until I walked in on them in bed tog., sleeping, spooning, naked.
Old Roadie 3 years ago
Your intuition knew. Hope you've moved beyond this neanderthal and regained your strength and confidence.
Load More Replies... MidwestAngst 3 years ago
Seems the BP staff member who posted this left out an entire gender. Was that on purpose?
Celeste Grant 3 years ago
I saw pics on Facebook of him weigh her at a wedding; I had been invited to the wedding too but was in the hospital having surgery to remove some of my cancer so he took his other woman. Thought it was strange that friends hadn't posted any pics... turns out he had been bribing people to keep it quiet. When I confronted him, he said it was my own fault as the cancer treatment had left me ugly (i lost my hair, eyebrows and eyelashes) and that I'd been a bad girlfriend because I had stopped having sex with him; in my defence I had had a year of horrible chemo by this point, and it had made me really sick, and tired. He said I should have been more aware of his needs and made more effort. I cried way more than I should have over him!
TankGirl 3 years ago
😳 you do NOT need to defend yourself at all for going through cancer treatments and not wanting to 'fulfill his needs'! I'm disgusted that he treated you that way! He is absolutely a POS for even just one part of that story. I'm so sorry!! I hope you are healing both emotionally and physically.
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Natalie Westby 3 years ago
I found out that I was the side chick after we broke up. Turns out he was engaged. He married her like a month after we broke up. The weird thing was that she looked exactly like me! Except, that I'm more curvaceous and shorter hair. I've only started growing out my hair in the last few years. Anyways, he was always bragging to me that she was an Olympic athlete (she played volleyball).
Craig Becker 3 years ago
I never believed the posts on BP were true until just last week, when I came home unexpectedly to find my wife in bed with her (female) best friend. I walked in on them in mid-frolic and my wife asked “would you care to join us?” As you
censorshipsucks 3 years ago
I wonder if cheating is related to income at all? My impression from the above posts is under-educated men and unemployed men tend to cheat more. Perhaps as ways to bolster self-esteem? Just asking a theory here
sturmwesen 3 years ago
More like: the higher up the less likely to talk about it
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Samara Morgan 2 years ago
Most likely some of them aren't even from an English speaking country, the rest is propably American ;)
Load More Replies... Julie Ann Al buzbeba 3 years ago
With my BD for 7 years....I had heard he had reconnected with his old HS girlfriend on FB...who I had always felt he had never gotten over. She caused him MAJOR heartbreak. I started feeling like maybe they were talking to each other more often than the occasional 'like' on FB posts. Just a feeling. One night when I was at work on break, we got into a major fight TEXTING about it on the phone where he kept denying everything and telling me I was totally crazy. Back and forth we texted, and then I got this text from him..."Just told her we were talking again...at least she knows now" It took me a second to realize he must have been texting her at the same time he was texting me...and had texted me a message to her on accident. I wrote back "Well if I wasn't sure before, I sure am now!" He tried to tell me he had written that text to me as a joke...to see how I would react. Stayed with him stupidly for 2 more months, until I walked in on them in bed tog., sleeping, spooning, naked.
Old Roadie 3 years ago
Your intuition knew. Hope you've moved beyond this neanderthal and regained your strength and confidence.
Load More Replies... MidwestAngst 3 years ago
Seems the BP staff member who posted this left out an entire gender. Was that on purpose?
Celeste Grant 3 years ago
I saw pics on Facebook of him weigh her at a wedding; I had been invited to the wedding too but was in the hospital having surgery to remove some of my cancer so he took his other woman. Thought it was strange that friends hadn't posted any pics... turns out he had been bribing people to keep it quiet. When I confronted him, he said it was my own fault as the cancer treatment had left me ugly (i lost my hair, eyebrows and eyelashes) and that I'd been a bad girlfriend because I had stopped having sex with him; in my defence I had had a year of horrible chemo by this point, and it had made me really sick, and tired. He said I should have been more aware of his needs and made more effort. I cried way more than I should have over him!
TankGirl 3 years ago
😳 you do NOT need to defend yourself at all for going through cancer treatments and not wanting to 'fulfill his needs'! I'm disgusted that he treated you that way! He is absolutely a POS for even just one part of that story. I'm so sorry!! I hope you are healing both emotionally and physically.
Load More Replies... Natalie Westby 3 years ago
I found out that I was the side chick after we broke up. Turns out he was engaged. He married her like a month after we broke up. The weird thing was that she looked exactly like me! Except, that I'm more curvaceous and shorter hair. I've only started growing out my hair in the last few years. Anyways, he was always bragging to me that she was an Olympic athlete (she played volleyball).
Craig Becker 3 years ago
I never believed the posts on BP were true until just last week, when I came home unexpectedly to find my wife in bed with her (female) best friend. I walked in on them in mid-frolic and my wife asked “would you care to join us?” As you
censorshipsucks 3 years ago
I wonder if cheating is related to income at all? My impression from the above posts is under-educated men and unemployed men tend to cheat more. Perhaps as ways to bolster self-esteem? Just asking a theory here
sturmwesen 3 years ago
More like: the higher up the less likely to talk about it
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