40 People Share Out-Of-Touch Thing An Older Person Have Said That Infuriated Them The Most
Americans aged 60 and older are alone for about seven hours a day, and among those who live by themselves, the number rises to over 10 hours a day.
While time spent alone isn't necessarily associated with adverse effects, it can be used as a measure of social isolation, which medical experts suspect leads to less cognitive stimulation.
Amidst these concerns, Reddit user TherapistsCouch made a post on the platform, asking others "What is the most out-of-touch thing an older person has told you?"
It quickly went viral and as of now has over 5.8K comments. Here are the ones that have received the most upvotes.
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When I was 16 (1990) I was visiting my grandpa (age 93) at his seniors residence. We were chatting in the common room about politics (grandpa was Very interested in politics) and I mentioned that I was looking forward to being old enough to vote.
Some miserable man (who was younger than grandpa) overheard and said that there was no point in me voting because women didn’t have the intellect to focus on politics and when I got married my husband would tell me who to vote for.
Well…. Grandpa didn’t like that!! He was a very quiet man but he bristled up like an offended hedgehog and said “Voting was probably beyond the mental capacity of both your parents. Inbreeding does tend to make people a bit dim”
My dad owned a auto repair shop and my little brother had worked for him as a mechanic for 10 years. My dad was complaining about my brother wanting to be paid 30/hr. My dad told me when he was working at the porsche dealership in the mid to late 70s he was only making $6/hr. I showed him that with inflation he was making $32/hr at 19 years old and 1 to 2 years of experience.
"People were kinder and less judgmental in my day, we didn't have any of this identity politics c**p."
They literally called in the military because black kids were going to school.
Oh yeah, back in the good ole days where nobody gave a f**k about how you look, what you believe or who you love... /s
Old woman said, those tattoos are going to look “great” when you’re 75. I said, does anything look good when you’re 75? She didn’t reply. She was about 75.
I've become the mediator between my boomer mom & millennial daughter. When my mom was complaining that my daughter never takes her advice on parenting I asked her if she took the advice her older relatives offered when she was raising me. Her answer, without any irony, was "but their advice didn't apply because times were different by then". You just answered your own question, Ma.
My dad, a wealthy boomer in his 60s who's had the same job for over 30 years: "People your age have never experienced real economic turmoil like my generation has. The market has been kind to you."
Me, his 31 year-old daughter: "[Dad's first name], what the f**k are you talking about. I've experienced 3 major recessions and I'm just in my 30s. You had to line up for gas in the 70s, while most of my friends can't get medical care or a mortgage."
He hung up lol
My boomer ex father-in-law was ashamed of the fact that my son, his grandson, is epileptic. He tried to forbid me from referring to his seizures as seizures, and instead call them "episodes", so people wouldn't know.
Ummm, no. I'm not going to trivialize a potentially life-threatening condition so that your golf buddies don't think less of your descendants and subsequently, your gene pool. Calling it an episode will prevent him getting the urgent the medical attention he would need in an emergency.
Sad but that has nothing to do with age or former times. There are always people that are afraid or ashamed of health issues, at every place and every age.
Grandma told me not to continue my education as I'd be knocked up in my early 20ies anyways and married, I'd need no education as my husband would care for me. Anyway, one degree and no pregnancies later (also no relationship later), I am glad I never listened to her.
What grandma said is terrible and clearly a big load of BS, but, presumably, that's what she was told, growing up. Glad this person managed to break the cycle of handing on awful advice.
A woman told me "I always see you reading books. You'll never get a man if you're too smart. They don't like that sort of thing."
I've suffered from endometriosis since being a teenager. Every month I got such cramps that I couldn't even stand up and sometimes so severe that I blacked out of pain. My mom never got the idea to take me to a doctor or a gynecologist. She thought I was just dramatic and wanted to get out of going to school. I suffered for a few years. I remember once my mom told me, when I have a child it will go away. That's because it was what she was told by her doctor in the 90's...
I went to a gynecologist and got prescribed meds that have helped me a big time and I can now function like a normal human.
My parents once kicked my bother out of the house for days, not allowing him back inside without a job, because they were convinced you can still walk into any business like "Hello, one job please" and get hired on the spot. Neither of them have even had an interview in 30 years.
My mom, who hasn't worked outside the home in 40 years, complaining about the homeless beggar outside Walmart where there was a big banner saying they're hiring. "Why can't they just go in and get a job?!"
I had to explain that when I was looking for a job, I had a home, reliable transportation, good work history, good references, an education, I had clean and professional clothing, the ability to keep myself hygienic, an ID, a phone and computer I can reliably be contacted at, I come from an upper middle class family, and the ability to take care of and treat my mental health... and even WITH all that, I sometimes wouldn't even get called in for an interview at an entry level job. Or if I was lucky enough to get an interview, I wouldn't necessarily get a call back to even tell me I didn't get the job.
Like I know Walmart isn't looking for much, but the job market is still competitive. Do you really think Walmart is going to hire someone who doesn't have basic resources available to even ensure they can show up to a job? I couldn't believe how out of touch she was and how much she takes for granted to believe you can just stroll in anywhere and be handed a job without anything to your name.
It's this general attitude "Why can't they just...?" Yeah, because you are the only person with a brain, and the one you're talking about hasn't thought of that, sure. They always act as if everyone not acting like they want must be stupid. Instead of yes, asking WHY: "this and that would seem a good cause of action, is there a reason that person can't do it? And if so, can we help?"
I recently had a conversation with my dad where he said 'I was a very active parent, I came home to you every day.' But all he did was work. He didn't cook, clean, help us with homework, make me feel better when sad, help me with bullies, do my hair, guide me to handle relationships or problems, or help me develop hobbies or character. He only paid bills. If he wasn't screaming at us for not cleaning, he was not interacting with us. I truly don't think my dad knows any of us. He still calls us by the wrong names. My stepmother and bio mother raised us. But he is convinced he was an active parent because he came home at night.
Reminds me of a colleague who said 'I sure help in the household. When the wife is vacuum-cleaning, i lift my feet.' - off course this was just a joke, he was a great guy
You'll understand Republicans when you're older.
It's been 15 years and they're more absurd than ever.
Had a boomer aunt say how kids are so lucky today they don't have to do nuclear bomb drills.
To her credit, when I said that, no, kids just have to do active shooter drills, her eyes went wide with realization that that was a more real threat than a nuke ever turned out to be.
When my daughter was one month old and old man asked me her name, which I told him. He looked confused and said “but that’s a girl name?!”. I replied “Yes, she’s a girl.”
He then looked even more confused and said “But he’s wearing blue.”
(For reference, she was wearing a jeans romper with a white bodysuit underneath, which was a unisex set we got before she was born since we didn’t want to know the sex beforehand)
I replied: “Yes, she’s wearing something blue but she’s a girl”
To which he, a bit angrily, replied: “But HE’s wearing BLUE!”.
My dad told me if I voted for Obama I was a traitor to my country, and he said it with literal tears and rage in his eyes. I didn’t say a word to him in response, I just shook my head sadly and left.
I probably would have done the same. There's no arguing with some people
My mother believes that mental illness and ✨ThE gAyS✨ is just a made up thing that the new generation made up for attention. I'm autistic...
A lot of studies hint that autism is genetic. I hope this person throws that into the mom's face along with the fact that "gays" are throughout history.
My mother said to me just a few days ago that a down payment for a house isn't that hard to save up for. I told her I barely have 5 grand saved up so far, she insisted that that is more than enough. I had to stress that 20% down has been the norm in our area since the 2008 crash. She hasn't bought property since the 90's.
Where I live, they had a "Rural Development" program that allowed me to get a house with a 1k down payment. All closing fee's, etc. paid for by the sellers. I was VERY luck to leverage this and a decent housing market about 10 or so years ago. Even my house in the boonies has almost doubled in value since then, but the the buyers market is so bad, it's not worth selling. Unreal.
My grandma tells me to gain weight so that my hips can better support childbirth.
Like every time she sees me I hear this, including when I was fighting cervical cancer. My only purpose in her eyes is to make babies, I guess.
Because as we all know gaining weight means, your actual hip bones become wider....
My dad visited me in the restaurant I was working in at the moment during peak hours and said "just tell your boss you're taking your break now and sit with me." Yeah, that's not how it works...
Who would visit anyone at their workplace? It's their workplace in their working hours. It's not the time nor the place for a visit.
"I survived napalm bombings during the Korean War. I can survive some stupid head cold."
Final conversation I had with my grandfather, asking what he did to prepare for the Covid19 pandemic. He and grandma passed away because of it 6 months later.
He was anti-smoking and felt that those who passed away were those with weak lungs from years of smoking. It was their punishment for torturing nonsmokers according to him, and he didn't need to worry because as a nonsmoker, his lungs were strong enough.
My grandpa told me if I can't afford a house to just buy some land and build a house on it.
My retired parents still say unless you go to college and get a bachelors degree you’ll end up “digging ditches”. I never went to college and make more than both of them did. They’ll die on that hill.
My mom asked why I can't just give my kid some kind of herbal medication for her severe mental illness... like sorry you want to die, have you tried ginko ??
Can anyone explain to me why so many parents, grandparents and other near relatives seem so f*****g indifferent to a child's suffering? Like, if my friend was ill, IDGAF whether it's a herb or surgery - do whatever is necessary to make them feel well again. But here it's stuff like this, or parents who decide that migraine or severe period cramps are 'nothing'... WTF is wrong with people? I thought I, the childfree lady, didn't have the best sense for kids, but seems as if a good chunk of parents beats me in that regard.
“Young people have no pride left. Why do they think it’s okay to still live with their parents at 20?” The average age to move out of a parents home in the U.K. is 35. Because there’s a rental crisis and a housing crisis especially in non-English countries partially because the retired English keep buying second homes in wales, Scotland and N.I. Wages have barely increased but rent and mortgages have increased extreme amounts and this is because of their generation Why older people don’t understand this concept is beyond me.
Two older people have told me to forgive my ex. The ex that abducted our children who I haven't seen for 3,5 years now.
They both told me to forgive him for my own sake. Not happening. Some things are unforgivable.
Especially during an ongoing trauma. My girls are still gone.
You don't forgive anyone for your own sake. You come to terms with what they did for your own sake. Forgiveness is for the other person.
it's so complex, the forgiveness thing. I am so sorry that you are living this nightmare trauma.
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I hate the phrase "being angry is like swallowing poison and hoping the other person dies." Let yourself be angry. S**t happened and it sucks. Yell and cry about it. Learn to live with the anger, don't just shove it down to try to make yourself feel better. Anger and spite fuel me a lot of the time and idc if people don't like it or just want me to feel calm and happy. Life is unfair and it truly does not matter to me if being upset about it changes anything. My feelings are valid and some people just don't deserve forgiveness. I will go to the grave a fuming spiteful b***h and not regret one moment of it.
Some things are unforgivable. Forgiveness is a choice, sometimes you have to acknowledge to yourself you can't or don't want to. Forgiveness is for yourself not for the other person. It's about processing by fully expressing the emotions from the event(s) until they are released, and experiencing compassion for the other person (hurt people will hurt people). None of this needs be expressed to the other person, they can be decease or no longer in your life. It is choosing to no longer fuel the fire and let it burn out.
My ex stopped visitation knowing I had no money to fight it. I haven't seen my youngest since she was 9 she is 26 now and living her life. I'm sorry this is happening to you.
I wonder if they'd say the same if their SO suddenly ran off with their young children or prized possession. Let's see if they live by their words or eat them spoonful by painful spoonful. >:-(
Why, do you need to forgive him?. He committed an unforgivable act unless you are a unfit parent...
“Minimum wage jobs are entry level, mostly for high schoolers to get a foot in the working world. If you want a better job you have to work for it.”
So I said “ok, so, if it’s for high schoolers it should run on high school time right? So, every minimum wage job should be closed from 7-3 and from 8 pm on? So, who’s making the coffee? Or fixing your hamburger for lunch?”
He had no response and quickly changed the subject.
In Southern California, my aunt, who heard we still rent, was like, "You don't have to buy a new home, just get yourself a $200k starter home and fix it up."
I was like, "starter homes that need fixing up in LA are like $1.2M" starting.
Some of the house-hunting shows on the west coast are WILD. You'll have a couple and she does "acoustic based crystal therapy" and he's a "freelance artist" and their budget is $1.2M...
My grandmother is always about how I should make children, be SAHM and how my SO should support the household on his income alone.
She's born in the 60's, was a SAHM with 3 kids and a big nice house while my grandfather was a coal miner.
So once again she is on about me having kids soon. I explain that our apartment is too small and I haven't been able to get full time job to put money aside (I have no interest in having kids, but she just doesn't understand it). She told me to "just get pregnant" and it will sort itself out.
Elderly aunt just advised me to marry "the oldest person I could seduce" to "set me up for the future". She's been married 7 times. No thanks!
Dear heavens, a disgrace to aunthood! Even Jane Austen advised her niece "do anything but marry without love" and that in an era where it was actually the best job for a woman.
A newlywed couple I'm related to was out taking wedding pictures in a little town square with their entire bridal party. We're a big Asian family, and it's reflected in who's in the bridal party aside from one of the groomsmen who served in the armed forces with the groom. An older white woman and her husband saw them and made their way to the venue, a hall that opened up to the main street. She came up to my uncle and me, who were ushering people in, and said, "Are you the wedding for the bridal party taking pictures outside?" We both said yes, and she went on, "Oh, everyone looks so nice, but one of the groomsmen is white?" I didn't think anything of her comment the first time and explained how he's a close friend who served with the groom. She decided to double down and said again, "But, he's white." Again, I said, "Well, yes, but he's a close friend of the groom." "But, he's white." Which prompted my uncle with, "Well, we asked for another minority at the groomsmen store, but all they had left were white boys." During this whole exchange, the husband of the lady was walking ahead her not really catching what was going on. He turned back to see what his wife was doing, pushed her along, and apologized to my uncle and I for what had just happened. The whole experience left me dumbfounded. Like, what is this the 50s? Are we still not allowed to have interracial friendships?
"Lots of people don't even want to own a home, young people would rather rent because they don't want the responsibility of home ownership." ...stfu, Grandma.
Back here in Germany that's just the truth. It's way easier and more comfortable to rent a house instead of owning it. You have a nice place to live and if something brokes and has to be repaired it isn't your job. And if you don't like the place anymore you will just move without waiting for someone who is able and willing the price that you demand.
“Kids aren’t expensive at all!” HAHAHHAA ok grandpa.
Varla-Stone:
He probably never raised a kid in his life because that's "a woman's job."
“Nobody wants to work anymore.” Actually tons of people are looking for work but are not gonna work for less than they deserve.
"When you're feeling better..."
Dad, I'm disabled, because my body is made from your and mom's s****y broken DNA.
"I didn't get any help!" He said, as he *walked into a building with his dad's name on it.*
Edit: He embezzled all of Grandpa's money and bankrupted the company and went to jail so I can't work there.
Also, he says he did it because "God told him to and it was the right thing to do, and I should thank him for setting such a good example" as nine year old me watched my dad get taken away in handcuffs *for a crime he absolutely committed.*
My grandma was shocked and couldn’t understand why I couldn’t just take as many days off work as I wanted to come to my grandpa's funeral.
That I talk like a man, because I used the term “surface area”. Women can be scientists too!
When I was in my 20s I was in a serious relationship with a black man and my grandma sat me down and told me that no white man would want me after this. She was honestly concerned about my well being and didn't mean it harshly. I just shrugged and told her I wouldn't want to date anyone who judged me like that anyway. My grandma was born in the 1930s to give some insight into her rationale.
Beside the ethical/racial part of this: Why is grandma concerned that every white man would know about the relationship with a black man?
i love asking my dad, who’s had a six figure career and owned property since the early 2000s, questions like how much he thinks i make a year (i’m a retail associate), how much he thinks my rent is, etc. apparently i make $80k and my brooklyn apartment costs $400 a month. if only 🫠
Same. My dad went to work for GM at 18, career. Hes in his early 80s now. Inhereted a lake front house back before I was born, then GM bought him a 10,000 sq ft house to run a plant (other side of the state) oh and its lake front. The guy was making 40 an hour in the 90s. I work at Home Depot and he wonders why I rent. Gee I dont know dad, maybe because your generation had it way better. I feel horrible for my children who are now entering the work force.
Note: this post originally had 97 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
Every generation thinks their elders are out of touch to a greater or lesser extent, it’s human nature. It’s easy to lose touch with current problems, especially with things like jobs, housing and finance. But, I hope that most people give advice with the best intent even if it does miss the mark by miles.
Oh boy. Lets hate on older people again today. It's been too long since this has occurred on BP - maybe two or three days?
You have a pretty weird interpretation of the term "hate on older people".
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BP is sinking fast in to A verses B verses C...can you stop it please. It doesn't do any of the 'generations' any good, it just breeds more contempt.
Every generation thinks their elders are out of touch to a greater or lesser extent, it’s human nature. It’s easy to lose touch with current problems, especially with things like jobs, housing and finance. But, I hope that most people give advice with the best intent even if it does miss the mark by miles.
Oh boy. Lets hate on older people again today. It's been too long since this has occurred on BP - maybe two or three days?
You have a pretty weird interpretation of the term "hate on older people".
Load More Replies... BP is sinking fast in to A verses B verses C...can you stop it please. It doesn't do any of the 'generations' any good, it just breeds more contempt.
