12 Disgusting ‘Baby Daddy’ Comments In The Delivery Room Turned Into Inspirational Quotes By This Nurse
InterviewYou’d think that more people would have respect for their partners when they’re giving birth. Unfortunately, the miracle of birth isn’t always the perfect and magical moment that you imagined it would be. Frankly, all it takes is a single phrase to turn a beautiful experience into something confusing when your partner starts criticizing you or even shows that they don’t much care about the entire miracle.
A labor and delivery nurse, who goes by Hollyd_rn online, poked fun at the inappropriate, misogynistic, and downright bizarrely unsupportive things that new fathers have said in the delivery room as the loves of their lives were going into labor. In a series of TikToks, Holly turned the quotes into ironic inspirational quotes that have captured the internet’s attention and are a great example of how not to behave when a brand new person is being born into the world.
Bored Panda had a quick chat with a relationship coach about how some of the behaviors that Holly criticized can do more harm than just hurting our feelings and sense of trust. Meanwhile, I also had an in-depth chat with nurse Holly about her videos. She told Bored Panda that she hopes her TikTok videos help bring positive attention to the unknown side behind the labor and delivery doors. She also pointed out that, in her experience, roughly 1 in 10 dads are unsupportive. Check out both interviews below.
@hollyd_rnPart 1: Some partners are hard to live up to! Get you a good one #laboranddelivery #labor
♬ A Thousand Miles - Vanessa Carlton
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"I feel that this commonality can change based on demographics, but on average I would say that approximately 1 in 10 are unsupportive and/or insensitive dads. There tend to be a lot more dads that don’t know how to support their significant others in labor, but I wouldn’t say those dads are insensitive, they just need guidance," Holly told Bored Panda. "So as a nurse in Labor and Delivery (L&D) we do a lot of coaching and educating the support person to help their significant others through labor."
According to Holly, dads and anyone else in a supporting role in the labor room are significant. "Their place and presence in the labor/delivery room is noticeable and can be iconic for your laboring wife or significant other. It’s okay to not know what to do, but being mentally and emotionally present is essential," the nurse advised future dads.
That's often referred to as the husband stitch... which is just horrific. Imagine the tightness of your partners vagina being your primary concern after she has just birthed your child! I saw a great response to this recently when the female dr responded "and exactly how small do you need it sir"
"Labor is no easy task, and it comes in all variations. Talk with your partner about their expectations and desires during labor, be adaptable as things progress, and be mentally and emotionally supportive of them. I guarantee your experience in the labor room will be unforgettable and you will develop more appreciation for your significant other during labor."
Holly also shared a bit about her journey into the realm of video content creation. She started making TikToks quite recent, back in February 2021, and her very first video was meant as a joke about L&D situations that she sent to her mom, who's also a nurse. "That video ended up going viral on TikTok and I soon realized that I could create a platform regarding my passion toward Labor and Delivery," she said.
I think no jury in the world would convict you if you'd castrated him on the spot.
I was exhausted when our first was born because my wife had been in labour for over 24 hours, so neither of us had slept in over a day. I can only imagine how tired she was. However, when they said the baby was coming, I've never felt more awake than I did at that time, no chance I could've taken a nap.
"I fell in love with L&D when I had my first child, and I knew this was where I needed to be. I am inspired daily when I work with my patients as to just how incredibly strong women are. I love being able to support women during this time by encouraging, laughing, praying, and even crying with them and still being able to guide them through a moment in their life they will never forget."
Holly’s video series proved that no matter how wonderful the occasion, there can always be someone who tries to ruin the magic. It also goes to show that, unfortunately, just because you’re becoming a dad doesn’t automatically turn you into a supportive husband, a loving partner, or a good person. These positive qualities are something that you build over years; they’re not handed to you the moment your partner goes into labor.
Relationship coach Alex Scot told me that certain behaviors can have an actual negative physical effect, something that’s actually backed up by science. “Contemptuous interactions affect people physically, often resulting in increased cases of illnesses like colds and the flu,” Alex said that when partners express contempt for each other, they’re harming each other not just emotionally and psychologically but also physically.
The awareness that problems exist and the commitment to change are what help heal a relationship. Alex told Bored Panda that if both partners are aware of the negative (and sometimes toxic) behaviors that they express and they’re willing to do whatever it takes to embrace change, then the relationship can be salvaged. Instead of ending, it can then thrive.
“However, if your partner is unwilling to admit their faults, and is not interested in growing together as a couple, then ask yourself if you’re willing to stay in that relationship long term,” Alex explained that there are some very difficult questions that you must ask yourself if your partner is constantly unsupportive and critical of everything that you do. Unfortunately, turning their toxicity into inspirational quotes won’t do much good, even if it helps bring attention to what not to do in the delivery room.
I'm going to remain in hope that the good dads will outnumber these bozos... let's keep on educating & inspiring for good.
Yeah, maybe you should go and wait somewhere else, like inside an active volcano or on the dark side of the moon.
Someone PLEASE give these women the emotional strength to ditch these husbands. They'll be a single mom either way - the only question is how much extra s**t they'll have to deal with while doing all the parenting.
Otherwise known as "legendary last words". Where's that picture of the birthing chair with the holes for the testicle string? Suddenly I understand the need for it!
Can we acknowledge that pregnancy and the year after delivery there are high rates of mortality in women not just because of the dangerous enterprise but domestic violence and really the rates of murder at the hands of her romantic partner? Can we? Sometimes that gal needs help, real help, and what I read here are signs of that - small signs that he does not see her as a real person.
How about inappropriate things mother in laws do? Mine was in the delivery room with us when our first kid was born, my wife was having difficulty passing the afterbirth so I stayed with her, and the nurse asked my mother in law to bring my son to the nurses station so they could clean him up. Did she? No! She took him to the waiting room to show him off to the family. 13 years later and I’m still pissed at her.
Further proof my mom was right: DO NOT have sex with someone you cannot have a child with. ....
I found those hard to read. If you do not find it important to support your wife/girlfriend during what can be long, painful, and mentally exausting hours, and if you are not ready to welcome your baby at any time and in any situation and condition, why be engaged in the first place? I do not understand this lack of responsibility and the selfishness. Besides, the behaviour shown above is stupid for one's own sake. Being a father-to-be who goes through the whole, well, labour with as much effort to support and love as possible, may be exhausting but it is also utterly rewarding. Witnessing the first cry of your newborn, cuddling it onto you while the mother gets some rest, feeling the intensity of being there together, and not letting your partner alone when she needed the feeling that she is doing awesome – why would anyone opt to miss that?
What a time to realize you have made a huge mistake that will last you the next 18 years. Man, just had a baby and now you have to go through a divorce, go through child support, custody determinations. But I am assuming these guys said horrible things like this prior to the pregnancy, keep an ear out before you are stuck co-parenting with them.
Wow. Just... wow. I hope the women in these scenarios didn't stay with the dad after saying awful things like that.
I say ditch these men and become a single mom. Better to deal with raising one child instead of two.....
For reference, I almost died after giving birth the first time. Fast forward about 4 years to the birth of baby #2. Now ex husband can't wait to get out of there so he can go to the gym and work out. Was gone for around 4 hours and finally came back with dinner around 9pm. While he was gone I shuffled down the hallway to get an ice pack (if you know, you know) and some crackers because I was starving.
My ex-husband to me when I gave birth to our second child after only 10 hours of labor, "This one was easy." Really? Was it easy for you? I'm so glad.
Society needs to have better men. Moms and dads should raise better human beings.
After seeing this article, I went over to my husband and gave him a big hug and a smooch. He was all-hands-on-deck and 1000% supportive while I was in labor with our kids, but I now feel like I never showed him the appreciation that he really deserves.
Every single man on this list doesn't deserve the woman having their child. Not a single one.
Read about a group of people that had a birthing ritual. Tied a cord around the baby daddy's genitals & gave the end of the cord to the woman giving birth to hold during labor. That way both parents experience childbirth together.
What in the actual f**k are we supposed to do with this? Some men are apparently completely horrible and there are women out there who literally let them in. 🤬
Side note: To each their own (I think people should decide individually), but I would never have wanted my husband of all people in the delivery room. My Mom, a sister, a niece, but not a man and definitely not my husband. (With my one son, I had my sister-in-law as birthing partner.) It's fine if people want their husbands, of course, but now women think that's what they SHOULD do, which is not right.
He reluctantly took me to the ER when I was bleeding heavily (we were at his friend's house and they were having a "good conversation, can't you wait a bit?"). The DOCTOR told him to go home and he'd call when it was over. Bleeding stopped, baby's now 40 years old and I raised him on my own.
my then husband didn't say anything about being tired, not seeing the t.v., or concerned about the change up to a c section unexpectedly. however, when he saw our son he did comment that at least he looked white. !!??? he was english/irish; i have olive complexion and until that moment he had never commented on my skin tone. totally shocked. needless to say, that comment stayed with me and i left after a few months.
I have a sister-in-law who's baby daddy was actively on tinder and nowhere to be found on the night she gave birth to their child. Needless to say they are separated now.
This makes me feel just a teeny bit better about when my mother showed me a picture of her holding my older brother when he was about 10 minutes old. To be fair... I was only six or seven when she showed me... still "wow, your hair's terrible in this picture - and you look so tired!" was perhaps my least tactful remark ever! Poor mum!
I’ve got a good one… my ex left me whilst I was 7 months pregnant for someone he worked for. I was put under so much stress at the end of my pregnancy that I didn’t want him in the labour room with me.. the doctors agreed that was best for me and my baby. My ex comes hurtling through, shouting “look I just want to be here for when he actually comes out, I’m not hanging around, because ****(girls name) is waiting outside and we’re going out to the cinema later”. I have luckily not seen the guy much since and my son (who is now 10) is not keen on really trying to find him either. There’s a lot of douche bags out there.
Instead of being grateful for being able to be part of the birth process, these guys are acting as if they're being dragged to the mall for a shopping trip. Contrast that with the thousands of real men out there who want to be in the room. My brothers and a few of my nephews did just that and never regretted it. In fact, after my nephews were born, my Dad made the comment that he wished he could have been in the delivery room when we were born (it wasn't the accepted deal when we came around). He could see from the relationship my brothers had with their boys that it was important -- and life-changing -- to be part of it all, to see when your baby draws the first breath, hear the first cry. That's how fathers are supposed to feel. These guys don't deserve the name -- they're sperm donors. I hope the women in these scenarios were able to find better relationships and role models for their babies.
Okay, we can all agree that these men are pigs; no questions there. But I have a question for the women. Why would you select a guy like this to be the father of your child? Why did you allow this guy to make you pregnant in the first place? Is it lack of self esteem? Or are you just in a hurry to have a child, no matter who the father is?
Let me just say one thing, if anyone, and I mean anyone, says anything like this to me while I’m in labor (I don’t think I want to have a baby and birth it it’s hard but still) you will be removed and I will personally throw something at your head
I'd rather raise a kid alone than have to put up with that, they'd be a bad influence on the kid anyway.
I would be raising that baby by myself cuz those men would all be either dead, permanently in a wheelchair or out of my life for good
Q: ARTA? Clue: The "A" is for "are" and the "T" is for "they." A: You betcha. Pity these women and theyir kids. Dynein is right: they'll be single moms no matter what, so they're better off doing it solo.
This is so sad. I am so fortunate that my husband is my best friend and we care about each other. These poor women... It is heartbreaking to think they have to hear this stuff while having a baby. Imagine how bad it is when they are home.
Oh my god this makes me want to kill. Why are these women with them?
Brave moms that gave sons/daughters to those a***oles and donkeys. I am really sorry but I decided to adopt as a single mother, regarding the situations I have seen, which are as worse as these.
well... my dad went to play hockey while my mother was deliverng me...
When my gran had my dad husbands generally weren't in the birthing room, reading these made me think that that wasn't a terrible idea!!! I had my mum with me (father did a runner half way through my pregnancy) and she was far more useful than he ever would have been.
Yes these men were rude and selfish bastards. But why did the woman WANT him there???? I mean really! Would you want to sit in a delivery room for 10 hours? The husbans cn really be no help. and just gets in the way. It would be different if the wife was only in early labour -- but don't blame the bloke IF he wants to go out and get something to eat. Or for that matter to go on his fishing trip. He's no help really , Yes I had four children .. The nurses were generally lovely and the doctor was kind and supportive. The last thing I needed was a husband there, getting in the way.
First off these women chose these immature self centered boys and secondly they stayed with them to have intercourse enough to become pregnant ,. I see this as bad choices by these women .
The comments at the end just annoy me, the ones about all men. There are just as many women out there who would say something stupid/annoying in a different circumstance.
I was desperate for my partner back and our baby needs her daddy too and then anxiety sets in and I was going into depression.... Grateful is nothing compare to how I feel now, all thanks to ALFRED HEALING HOME My marriage is restored. WhatsApp him for help +2348076480598 email: alfredhealinghome@gmail.com
Someone PLEASE give these women the emotional strength to ditch these husbands. They'll be a single mom either way - the only question is how much extra s**t they'll have to deal with while doing all the parenting.
Otherwise known as "legendary last words". Where's that picture of the birthing chair with the holes for the testicle string? Suddenly I understand the need for it!
Can we acknowledge that pregnancy and the year after delivery there are high rates of mortality in women not just because of the dangerous enterprise but domestic violence and really the rates of murder at the hands of her romantic partner? Can we? Sometimes that gal needs help, real help, and what I read here are signs of that - small signs that he does not see her as a real person.
How about inappropriate things mother in laws do? Mine was in the delivery room with us when our first kid was born, my wife was having difficulty passing the afterbirth so I stayed with her, and the nurse asked my mother in law to bring my son to the nurses station so they could clean him up. Did she? No! She took him to the waiting room to show him off to the family. 13 years later and I’m still pissed at her.
Further proof my mom was right: DO NOT have sex with someone you cannot have a child with. ....
I found those hard to read. If you do not find it important to support your wife/girlfriend during what can be long, painful, and mentally exausting hours, and if you are not ready to welcome your baby at any time and in any situation and condition, why be engaged in the first place? I do not understand this lack of responsibility and the selfishness. Besides, the behaviour shown above is stupid for one's own sake. Being a father-to-be who goes through the whole, well, labour with as much effort to support and love as possible, may be exhausting but it is also utterly rewarding. Witnessing the first cry of your newborn, cuddling it onto you while the mother gets some rest, feeling the intensity of being there together, and not letting your partner alone when she needed the feeling that she is doing awesome – why would anyone opt to miss that?
What a time to realize you have made a huge mistake that will last you the next 18 years. Man, just had a baby and now you have to go through a divorce, go through child support, custody determinations. But I am assuming these guys said horrible things like this prior to the pregnancy, keep an ear out before you are stuck co-parenting with them.
Wow. Just... wow. I hope the women in these scenarios didn't stay with the dad after saying awful things like that.
I say ditch these men and become a single mom. Better to deal with raising one child instead of two.....
For reference, I almost died after giving birth the first time. Fast forward about 4 years to the birth of baby #2. Now ex husband can't wait to get out of there so he can go to the gym and work out. Was gone for around 4 hours and finally came back with dinner around 9pm. While he was gone I shuffled down the hallway to get an ice pack (if you know, you know) and some crackers because I was starving.
My ex-husband to me when I gave birth to our second child after only 10 hours of labor, "This one was easy." Really? Was it easy for you? I'm so glad.
Society needs to have better men. Moms and dads should raise better human beings.
After seeing this article, I went over to my husband and gave him a big hug and a smooch. He was all-hands-on-deck and 1000% supportive while I was in labor with our kids, but I now feel like I never showed him the appreciation that he really deserves.
Every single man on this list doesn't deserve the woman having their child. Not a single one.
Read about a group of people that had a birthing ritual. Tied a cord around the baby daddy's genitals & gave the end of the cord to the woman giving birth to hold during labor. That way both parents experience childbirth together.
What in the actual f**k are we supposed to do with this? Some men are apparently completely horrible and there are women out there who literally let them in. 🤬
Side note: To each their own (I think people should decide individually), but I would never have wanted my husband of all people in the delivery room. My Mom, a sister, a niece, but not a man and definitely not my husband. (With my one son, I had my sister-in-law as birthing partner.) It's fine if people want their husbands, of course, but now women think that's what they SHOULD do, which is not right.
He reluctantly took me to the ER when I was bleeding heavily (we were at his friend's house and they were having a "good conversation, can't you wait a bit?"). The DOCTOR told him to go home and he'd call when it was over. Bleeding stopped, baby's now 40 years old and I raised him on my own.
my then husband didn't say anything about being tired, not seeing the t.v., or concerned about the change up to a c section unexpectedly. however, when he saw our son he did comment that at least he looked white. !!??? he was english/irish; i have olive complexion and until that moment he had never commented on my skin tone. totally shocked. needless to say, that comment stayed with me and i left after a few months.
I have a sister-in-law who's baby daddy was actively on tinder and nowhere to be found on the night she gave birth to their child. Needless to say they are separated now.
This makes me feel just a teeny bit better about when my mother showed me a picture of her holding my older brother when he was about 10 minutes old. To be fair... I was only six or seven when she showed me... still "wow, your hair's terrible in this picture - and you look so tired!" was perhaps my least tactful remark ever! Poor mum!
I’ve got a good one… my ex left me whilst I was 7 months pregnant for someone he worked for. I was put under so much stress at the end of my pregnancy that I didn’t want him in the labour room with me.. the doctors agreed that was best for me and my baby. My ex comes hurtling through, shouting “look I just want to be here for when he actually comes out, I’m not hanging around, because ****(girls name) is waiting outside and we’re going out to the cinema later”. I have luckily not seen the guy much since and my son (who is now 10) is not keen on really trying to find him either. There’s a lot of douche bags out there.
Instead of being grateful for being able to be part of the birth process, these guys are acting as if they're being dragged to the mall for a shopping trip. Contrast that with the thousands of real men out there who want to be in the room. My brothers and a few of my nephews did just that and never regretted it. In fact, after my nephews were born, my Dad made the comment that he wished he could have been in the delivery room when we were born (it wasn't the accepted deal when we came around). He could see from the relationship my brothers had with their boys that it was important -- and life-changing -- to be part of it all, to see when your baby draws the first breath, hear the first cry. That's how fathers are supposed to feel. These guys don't deserve the name -- they're sperm donors. I hope the women in these scenarios were able to find better relationships and role models for their babies.
Okay, we can all agree that these men are pigs; no questions there. But I have a question for the women. Why would you select a guy like this to be the father of your child? Why did you allow this guy to make you pregnant in the first place? Is it lack of self esteem? Or are you just in a hurry to have a child, no matter who the father is?
Let me just say one thing, if anyone, and I mean anyone, says anything like this to me while I’m in labor (I don’t think I want to have a baby and birth it it’s hard but still) you will be removed and I will personally throw something at your head
I'd rather raise a kid alone than have to put up with that, they'd be a bad influence on the kid anyway.
I would be raising that baby by myself cuz those men would all be either dead, permanently in a wheelchair or out of my life for good
Q: ARTA? Clue: The "A" is for "are" and the "T" is for "they." A: You betcha. Pity these women and theyir kids. Dynein is right: they'll be single moms no matter what, so they're better off doing it solo.
This is so sad. I am so fortunate that my husband is my best friend and we care about each other. These poor women... It is heartbreaking to think they have to hear this stuff while having a baby. Imagine how bad it is when they are home.
Oh my god this makes me want to kill. Why are these women with them?
Brave moms that gave sons/daughters to those a***oles and donkeys. I am really sorry but I decided to adopt as a single mother, regarding the situations I have seen, which are as worse as these.
well... my dad went to play hockey while my mother was deliverng me...
When my gran had my dad husbands generally weren't in the birthing room, reading these made me think that that wasn't a terrible idea!!! I had my mum with me (father did a runner half way through my pregnancy) and she was far more useful than he ever would have been.
Yes these men were rude and selfish bastards. But why did the woman WANT him there???? I mean really! Would you want to sit in a delivery room for 10 hours? The husbans cn really be no help. and just gets in the way. It would be different if the wife was only in early labour -- but don't blame the bloke IF he wants to go out and get something to eat. Or for that matter to go on his fishing trip. He's no help really , Yes I had four children .. The nurses were generally lovely and the doctor was kind and supportive. The last thing I needed was a husband there, getting in the way.
First off these women chose these immature self centered boys and secondly they stayed with them to have intercourse enough to become pregnant ,. I see this as bad choices by these women .
The comments at the end just annoy me, the ones about all men. There are just as many women out there who would say something stupid/annoying in a different circumstance.
I was desperate for my partner back and our baby needs her daddy too and then anxiety sets in and I was going into depression.... Grateful is nothing compare to how I feel now, all thanks to ALFRED HEALING HOME My marriage is restored. WhatsApp him for help +2348076480598 email: alfredhealinghome@gmail.com