18 Saddening Replies To The Question ‘What Would You Do If There Were No Men On Earth For 24 Hours’ Shared On TikTok
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According to global estimates by the World Health Organisation, around 1 in 3 women worldwide have experienced physical and/or sexual violence. That makes up about 35% of the population of women. Moreover, the WHO indicates that approximately 38% of murders of women are committed by a male intimate partner. Evidently, there’s a huge disproportion in terms of who experiences the most violence towards them. Sadly, there’s a pattern that definitely needs reevaluation and the times are calling for a change.
Luckily, young women and girls are starting to speak out more, and the #MeToo movement that broke out several years ago has made it somewhat safer for the victims to come forward with their stories. That doesn’t mean that the problem has gone away.
The more we’re open in these conversations, the safer the world will be for women in the future. That’s why it is important that young people are using social media platforms to speak out on issues that can’t be overlooked anymore. So when someone on TikTok asked “what would you do if there were no men on earth for 24 hours,” it was a learning moment for some. “it makes me mad and sad that women have to fear doing all these things because some idiots thought that it’s a great idea to harass women,” one man on Twitter commented. “We as men need to do better,” another one added.
Scroll down below to read the answers from women and tell us what you think, and what you would do if there were no men for 24 hours, in the comment section!
More info: Twitter
Someone on TikTok asked women “what would you do if there were no men on earth for 24 hours”
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The thread almost instantly went viral. It seemingly resonated with a lot of people, as almost half a million of Twitter users “liked” it. Naturally, there were people who disagreed with such portrayal of men. “Right… because only men can be criminals and engage in illegal acts,” someone tweeted sarcastically. “Buy a gun, learn self defense, don’t walk alone at night,” one man immediately offered a solution to the problem.
The comments from the post were shared on Twitter
Image credits: wxixp
“Saw a TikTok that said, what would you do if there were no men on Earth for 24 hours,” Twitter user @wxixp posted. “Here was the comment section,” she tweeted with a sad emoji—understandably so, as the comment section is really disheartening to read.
“Go on walks at night”
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“Wear whatever I want and feel safe while doing so”
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“A massive picnic with my girls at late and sleep under the stars”
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“Live how I want to live”
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One clear pattern emerged—it’s that women would very much like to go out at dark hours without fearing for their lives. In addition to this, there were a couple of people who shared that they would dress any way they want, again, without fearing for their safety.
There were man who were dissatisfied with the generalization of men
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But the response from women was quick and savage
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In case any of those "But I'm a nice guy" guys are reading this: 1) Unless you're a friend, you're a stranger, and nobody knows you are actually nice. 2) A lot of thieves and rapists seem like nice guys because that's a tactic. Sooooo don't blame the women for overreacting, blame the guys for making the world so dangerous for them.
Yep. Are the majority of my interactions with men perfectly fine? Of course! Have I also had interactions that had me fearing for my safety and my life? You betcha. The bad guys don't have signs saying "I'm bad!" or have a "bad look," so we have to exercise care. It's like if I told you that in a bowl of M&M's the majority were perfectly safe and lovely but one or two of them would make you violently ill - would you reach in and chow down or exercise caution before you took a bite?
This is a perfect analogy!
Miztre love
Very well put. Thank you.
@DiannaSiever It is a good analogy. This is not misandry because 50% of women experience sexual violence. And nobody brought race into this. This applies to men, which is why we have to exercise caution.
Or not take any bites at all! The chance of me eating one of those poison M&Ms is enough to dissuade me from it just as much as the chance of an encounter with a bad actor is enough to keep one AirPod out while walking alone.
JamezyJamez easy
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No, it's not. Let's assume you are a white supremacist and replace the inference to "men" with "black people". Now do you see how this thinking is wrong?
And btw, I do empathize with women and the crap they have to endure as a result of the jackasses of the world. When I encounter one (or more) in places where we are isolated, I take actions such as greeting them, steeping off the trail, when possible, and letting her pass. I'll make noise so that she/they know where I'm at. I can't say I like doing it per se (but neither do I mind), but do feel this kind of thing is necessary in today's world.
Thanks for doing those things, Jerry. I've encountered men before who did the same things for me. It made me feel bad for them, but I appreciated that the effort was made.
That's very considerate of you! I really do feel bad for the genuinely decent guys of the world. It's sort of like the whole class being punished because that one asshole kid couldn't manage to behave himself.
Thank you, Jerry. It seems like you are trying to understand rather than expect us to just get over it.
Jerry, Today's world? I get you are trying to be kind but it's those kind of blinders that are detrimental. It's Not Today's World. It's Decades, Upon Centuries, to the beginning of time. Learned behavior in the male psyche that women are less than. You may not show clinical bad behavior but do you speak up when another man is out of line? Or maybe less overt behavior, such as if you had to choose between a male or female financial planner, instinctively is the male more qualified? Would it bother you if a woman made more than you for the same work? See, no men on earth for 24 hours is just a ban-aid on a bullet wound.
Eagle Girl ?
Bless your heart, at least I see a person who wants people to know he’s coming and their safe.
Please, all of you wonderful men who are in the vast majority of men who are not violent towards women, who could not possibly rape anyone, who wouldn't dream of ganging up on a lone woman to taunt her 'for the fun of it', please TALK TO OTHER MEN about how inappropriate it is to behave like that, how unacceptable misogyny is, how very much it does not make any man stronger and more manly to behave threateningly to women. The bad men among you do not listen to women, but they may listen to you.
should not they hear what their mom said ?? why is it only men fault ?
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... so if a man you care about sees a "bad" man harassing a woman and decides to step up and say something and then gets stabbed to death for his effort, will that make you feel BETTER? Evil is evil. Males aren't by definition part of some exclusive club where we're all friends and we all hang out. This idea that "good" men should somehow be responsible to "fix" all the evil in the world is absurd.... first of all because you can't "fix" evil and second because those evil men you fear are actually much MORE LIKELY to commit acts of violence against OTHER MEN... and if a man who loves you fails to protect you, he may very well commit suicide rather than face the shame of his failure. Being a woman is hard. I get it... but being a good man doesn't mean the entire world is simply a video game with all the cheat codes. Women here talk about how the world would be a better place if evil men didn't exist... but good men are somehow responsible for making evil disappear....
Geoff -
yes. it's not all men's fault, but it's better safe than sorry. the sad truth is that there are so many men out there that AREN'T nice guys, that women can't feel safe around them anymore. they aren't shaming every man, it's just that the norm often is that many men are predators to women
(Male here), when we flag up unacceptable behaviour, it's typically dismissed and they'll justify it somehow. Just no getting through to some of them who are convinced they're being flirty and charming instead of predatory. Sadly it seems so deeply normalised that it will take a lot of work and time to sort. At the very least I'd like to live to see a generation not have these things so prevalent that everyone knows a rape victim. Obviously we'll not give up, it's not nice when school girls have to worry about men being dangerous, I want them to be able to stay as kids until they mature naturally, not be slapped out of their innocence by necessity because many men just don't take no for answer and prey on those they see as weak
Aodhán Monaghan follower
Aodhán Monaghan Good response!
Aodhán Monaghan no
Aodhán Monaghan ?
Exactly. A lot of serial criminals get away with it for a long time just because they look and act like a completely normal and average person!
Case in point - Ted Bundy. Looked like a clean cut nice young man.
If you have to say and swear you are a nice guy, I bet you aren't.
I've noticed that guys who say "I'm a nice guy" never are. I know a few who say that to girls, but in reality, they are complete dickheads. Act like a decent human being instead of saying that you are one.
I agree but would like to add women can be dangerous too, albeit a lower percentage I think.
I don't think women are overreacting. But I do think it's not a complete picture. Sure, if men were gone for 1 day, you could do all things suggested and for most women nothing would happen. Of course that is true right now. But as you expand the timeframe, the chances of something bad happening go up. Both in reality and in the hypothetical situation. I'd bet within a year (with no men) you couldn't walk the streets at night anymore than you could now. People are people. Getting rid of men would just end up with criminally minded women filling the gap. Maybe less if 1 type of crime and maybe more of another. But it would be there. Women's prisons show a power structure at the same rate men's do.
that's not the point. the point is that men make sexual & violent advances on women, and there are more cases of women being kidnapped/killed/raped by men then there are of women doing those things to other women, and that's why were fearful. we don't have a choice. if you go out late at night and you're attacked, it's almost always by a man, so if you eliminate men for 1 night (nobody ever said more so idk why you brought that up, bc obviously it's not forever and that would change things) then there's no chance of you being attacked by a man, which is the most common
Um, Rissie, what are the potential outcomes if a dude isn't trusted by a woman? 1. Dude doesn't get laid. 2. Woman gets raped and murdered.
Can you walk the streets at night now? If so, what makes you believe women left alone would not be able to?
Rosanna Jackson like
funny, I was thinking along the same lines
The idea that women would “fill the gap” strongly conflicts with all DOJ crime data. Try Not to let your emotions prevent you from making fact-based, rational arguments. No one is trying to make you feel bad. No need to be sensitive.
I think the biggest thing is that there wouldn't be any men to automatically physically overpower us. That's really what this is all about. If women were physically stronger than men on average, then it wouldn't matter if all men were assholes. Because we wouldn't have to be afraid.
But there in lies the problem. I completely agree with you that all women have the right to act anyway they want and I say ALL women. HOWEVER, lumping all men into one group is not the solution. There will never be a perfect society but everyone can take steps in whatever manner they can to create positive change. In other words "men" are not the problem; "assholes" are the problem.
It's not lumping all men together as bad. It's being careful and not taking chances with men they don't know. They have to be this cautious because 1) there are a lot more bad men out there than most people think and 2) the bad they do can be devastating, lifelong, and even fatal. Those two facts are what #MeToo is determined to bring to the surface.
We absolutely know that it's not all men, but just a minority of them. However, a lot of bad people (a**holes) are wolves in sheep's clothing, hence our trepidation.
When women express a fear of assault, it's common for men to mansplain safety to them. "Don't walk alone at night, lock your doors, carry pepper spray", etc. etc.. The onus is ALWAYS put on the woman to protect herself, as if it's their own fault if they get attacked.
Looking at the original question in the post - it only asked what women would do if there were no men for 24 hours. That would mean all the toxic men are missing. So this is what they would do in that situation. It does not mean all men are toxic. I'm sure I could make some comments about sets and subsets, but maths was too long ago. To be honest, if all men were absent, there'd probably be some toxic women who would take advantage of that somehow and screw it up anyway.
Yeah, Bob, you're "not all menning" here.
It was a thought experiment; don’t take it personally. Try it. Imagine if there were no women for 24 hours. You’d have 24 hours during which you could whine about anything and no woman would call you butt hurt or triggered. Does this mean every woman thinks you’re a butt hurt, triggered whiner? Of course not. This is all theoretical. But thanks for pointing out that society isn’t perfect; I don’t think anything of us had noticed that before.
Tina Hugh good
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@Troux, yes it is. Most men are not a threat at all. Still you are saying be careful of all men because some are assholes. You are lumping everyone together. And to keep holding on to that will prevent you from any solution. Even without "asshole men", a group of people will emerge that will try to become dominant by means of aggression. And that means as a none aggressor you will always find an adversary that you need to take measures against. But if you don't want to learn and keep believing that all men are the problem, well then you're essentially accepting that women should protect themselves against all men by no using any potentially sexual invitations. Grow past it, find actual solutions and you earn the right to wear a miniskirt at night back again.
When I walk around at night, Im scared of other men. I have never been attacked by a woman.
Yup. I also make a habit of looking as harmless as possible if I meet a woman on the street at night, preferring to even cross the street so that she doesn´t have to walk by me. I feel so very sad that my first thought is "Better not look intimidating!" when I walk towards a woman in the evening or at night... :-(
Yes, I do the same.
Tony Reynolds Good response!
Tony Reynolds -
keyontoh good
Tony Reynolds +
Nicklas Linder ?
Yesssss, this.
Luisa Vasconcelos good
Yep. Husband said same. He has never walked into a room and been concerned about being there due to any women who were present.
I am a woman and I have. I've been attacked by both in different settings and they were both not my doing or my fault and it took a long time to realize that.
Dudes never have to worry about getting harassed by women on their way to work.
consider yourself lucky then
I’ve been attacked by women. But yes, it’s the fear that some ’guy’ is going to jump out at you. I blame allot of that on society but also, it’s just facts, unfortunately..
There seems to be a lot more evil out there than good. And that needs to change.
Maybe not but it’s still possible
Jose Velasquez yes
Jose Velasquez like
Jose Velasquez no
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Walk in my area then. The sex workers will scare the hell out of you.
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And still you are here alive because most of them don't hurt you.
You can be seriously hurt without dying you (insert insult here).
I've never had a female threaten me or trying to touch me by force. However, I've had plenty of men do this, some of them even these so called "nice guys". So yes...I accept lumping men in this case. And to the answer, I would go on a nightly walk somewhere in the forest. :)
Jaana Kaurisalo -
Jaana Kaurisalo +
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night-time forest walks and picnics in the dark are nice dreamy sentiments but do little to keep hungry wildlife at bay - getting rid of men would only make you 'feel' safer!
There is no hungry wildlife where I live. But we still have plenty of forests.
Hungry wildlife in many parts of Europe would be foxes and deer. There are no bears or wolves or lynx anymore. No problem there. Believe me: it’s the fear of men that is holding us back.
I might get gnawed on by a kea or pukeko (both birds) but there's no wildlife that will eat or kill me here. No snakes. People however, would/could be considered a 'predator' I have to be wary of (not all men at all, only a minority. But I've been followed twice in an extreme way, once I asked ppl at a bus stop to pretend they knew Me, the second time I hid in a busy shop. But less than a week after one of those times a woman was murdered about a block from where I had been walking/lived. I felt like maybe id been overreacting to being followed, until that happened. Never ever took that risk again (unless i had no choice)
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You may not have, but I have had plenty of women manipulate me and make me fell like s**t to the point that I'm not sure how I'm still alive. Your one case is not the voice for the entire world. Everyone has their own points of view. I'm not saying yours is wrong, but understand it's not the only one that exist.
I'm really sorry this happened to you. Women can be abusive too.
But were you afraid for your life, on a regular, ongoing basis? Because women (with a few exceptions) have to be aware of their surroundings for fear of attack, at all times.
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Helen, not all women have to be aware of their surroundings. There are places where women do feel safe and there are differences depending on the country and the area. And even if he wasn't afraid on a regular basis, would that make his point any less valid?
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Thats too bad. There are shitty people everywhere. I've had more negative interactions with "Karens" than my wife has had with men. Its situational and isn't always the norm.
Yeah, but your negative interactions with "karens" 🙄 may, for all we know, be utterly your fault. Sorry, but some of the things you post on BP lead me to believe that you most likely are at the very least partly to blame. Your point score on here is -2254 for a reason.
“Negative interactions” like being told to f**k off or something similar? Not violence or threat of violence like many women face from men though...
Jesus, these guys just don't get it. Women aren't saying that ALL men are rapists and murderers. But most rapists and murderers are men, and guess what? They can't be identified when they're just walking down the street! It's safer for women to assume a man is dangerous, because if she's wrong about that then the worst thing that can happen is an offended male ego. If she assumes all men are safe to be around, the worst that could happen is she becomes another dead body.
Thank you for voicing this, 'Phil Vaive'. God loves you. -A Teenage Girl
You speak the truth, Phil.
Great comment.
Well said. I will use this example in the future. Thank u for that.
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Switch "men" for "Muslims". Now you switch sides. Its "not all Muslims" and "you're a bigot how dare you."
that's not at all the same thing, that's completely racist and has nothing to do with this
During a conversation a guy mentioned how he did not like this gay therapist we had. Saying that the way he looked, talked, behaved made him feel unsafe, even though nothing really was happening. To which I was very clear that he now finally knew how women felt on a daily basis. He really did not like that, stating that he did not want to know.
Maybe that’s why so many straight men have such hate or dislike towards gay men, they’re afraid that one might come along and do something that will make them feel comfortable , something women deal with from men in general throughout their lives. And yet they still don’t understand what it feels like for women.
Yeah, I never understood those guys. On the one hand, they slander gay men by calling them feminine, swishy, f****ts, when on the other they are all afraid they will get raped by big, strong, scary men.
Dark Pigeon Good response!
You know, try turning it around. Ask men what they would do if there were no women for 24 hours. I'm apologise for generalising, but I'm pretty sure 99% of the replies would involve "gaming in my underpants all day", in a tongue-in-cheek way. I have absolutely no problem with this kind of humour (I mean, us women ARE difficult, and we DO nag you a lot, sorry for that!), but just look at the world of difference... Women are actually afraid of men, while men are just happy to escape the nagging (if I may be so free to generalise for a second). I think that says enough.
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This is pretty much the only comment that offends me. Lounging or whatever in underwear or PJ's or whatever is apparently only creeping for men to do, but not women? it's called being comfortable. It has nothing to do with masturbation, it's a function of being comfortable. All you had to point out is that there is a disparity: we plan to do what we want, because there's no need to consider our partner, where as the women answering the question are answering about doing things that they would never have felt safe doing. and I, and many others here, would agree: THIS IS A PROBLEM. many men of my generation feel the same- most, probably. Most of us are generally being quiet because we also get yelled at for 'white knighting' and because nobody is going to believe that we do agree, so whatever.
danielw love
you know we have other hobbies right? Generally, men and women will have different interests but that doesn't mean men can enjoy walks or women don't like videogames. A lot of people won't except equality as ur birthright and that's just a fact.
Jake Peralta easy
I tip my hat to your kind
Julie Roberts no
Danielw: I'm sorry of my post offended you, I didn't mean to offend anyone. But I must explain that I don't think at all that gaming in your underwear is creepy or wrong! Hey, I prefer comfort too, and yes, that can be accomplished by a lack of clothes. :-) All I meant to say is that that's what I think the gist of the replies would be, and how that would be so different from the women's answers.
I get what you're saying, and I appreciate that you stressed that you were generalizing. I've never nagged and I don't have a problem with men who enjoy gaming.
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Men are scary and women are a pain in the ass, I guess we're even. (Let the downvotes pour forth.)
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I think men would be in a better mental state if not women existed. There would be less manipulation and less subjection to image standards. And yes, men are subjected to image standards all the time. Find me a normal looking Marvel or DC hero.
Are you ok?
I had the same thought as most of the women in the thread. I'd go for a run with both earbuds in my ears and not worry about who is on the path with me and how I would escape. Yes, women can do bad things. But another woman does not have the physical advantage over me that men do. My husband is a regular guy. But he could overpower me in a heartbeat. I have a fighting chance against another woman.
I go to the gym by myself often and I can’t count the times I’ve had a guy try and talk to me or hit on me when I had ear buds in, sometimes I’m not even listening to music I just have them in so people hopefully won’t come up and talk to me. I’ve never had another girl come up to me it’s always a man.
I'm a guy that only dates guys. Often in public I'll approach women if I need help, directions, where is this equipment, how do you turn this on etc because they're usually less aggressive, less intimidating, less hostile and less toxic or judgey. Yes it's a sweeping generalisation, but as most think I'm straight, there's a lot of expectations about what I'm supposed to know
Sometimes I wonder if it even registers with men how they come off. I have been accused of overreacting so many times by men, and then I have to go through this little game of "well, what would you do if *you* were 175cm and 65kg and the other person was like, 185cm and 80kg"? It really bothers me that I constantly have to justify why I'm feeling uncomfortable in a situation and navigate men getting butthurt over me not feeling that great around them. No female driver has ever locked me into their car, men have. (Uber, child safety lock, demanding my number) No female driver has ever sped up to 180kph on a 90kph road because I've disagreed with something they said. No woman has ever called me to shout at me because I "wasn't being sweet enough" in a professional email. No woman has ever followed me for entire blocks, no woman has ever been dismissive when I told them about being followed and boy I could go on for days. Point is, if a woman tells you that they are uncomfortable, listen.
This is such a valid point and spot on
Frankenfrog good
Someone actually wrote that this question "attempts to exonerate women of their responsibility to protect themselves." WHAT!?!
It goes hand in hand with "if she hadn't worn that skirt, maybe she would not have been rapped!"
Right??? Let's protect ourselves by banishing all men then XD
That person is the most idiotic moron ever.
That lacking in intellect male wants to pretend that he doesn’t know that women and girls are generally incapable of defending themselves physically (less muscles in a woman’s body etc); it is because of that factor that makes it is so exhausting to try to take as many precautions as possible as a woman to try and protect myself, because all the precautions I take still won’t give me the amount of muscle and testosterone that the male has
As a man, I'd feel safer for a day if men vanished for 24 hours too.
Cheers.
True stories: I live in a big city, and have done a fair amount of walking at night to and from public transport: Sixteen: typical teenager, sitting at the back of a bus. Older man with tattoos came and sat next to me. I tried to ignore him. Next thing he's got his hand on my thigh. I tell him to get back over his side of the seat, and then go make a complaint to the driver. He got kicked off. 20s: waiting at a bus stop in the dark. Man walking on the other side of the road sees me. Stops, makes eye contact...and starts walking right toward me, rapidly. I'm absolutely terrified. Bus comes around the corner, he stops and walks away. 30s: get off bus in the dark, just across the road from my house. I cross the road, a man walks past, stares at my breasts and says 'mmmmm.' Same house, different day. A man follows me into my driveway. I turn around and ask if I can help him. He turns, walks away. Are most men like this? No. Are there enough that make life a bit scary sometimes? Yes.
When I was 16 and worked in a grocery store we had this older man come in frequently he was always friendly to everyone and never inappropriate until.. I asked him if he would like to be interviewed for a paper I had to do about local history. We met in a park during the middle of the day. He literally started rubbing on my thigh and asked if I’d like to come to his house after to just watch tv and hang out. I left super quick. This man was around 70 years old. I was 16.
@WildBerry Shut up.
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You caught him on the one day of the week that he feels horny. Maybe the one day of the month at his age.
WildBerry Good response!
Guys what would you tell your daughter about walking alone at night, or going to a club alone, or running in the park at night?
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Have fun but use common sense. I would tell the same to my son. Every coin has two sides. Why are you walking alone at night to begin with? Don't take unnessary risk just for fun. I'd have different worries about different things. Men can be robbed and killed for $20 just like women can.
Men may be at less risk, but it doesn't mean the risk is zero. I'm raising my son to respect men and women as best I Can, but I still also want him to be safe. That's what Bob's getting at I think.
Bob, you are clueless.
I'd do the same things I normally do. That's because any stranger is a potential threat, so it's best not to generalize. However, like most women, I know what it's like to be harassed by men in public, so I understand where their responses came from.... *sigh*
I've been threatened by plenty of strangers in my lifetime and every single one of them was male. I've never been threatened by a woman, ever.
Right before I left home for college, my dad showed me the trick of holding my room key between my fingers when I was out walking after dark. He told me to ball up my fist and aim for their eyes. I'm 36 years old and I still hold my keys like this.
Mace on keyring, keys in knuckles, always park under the nearest street light, check under and in the car before entering, have 911 mostly dialed when walking alone, yell 'fire' instead of 'rape' if you don't want to be ignored, and the list goes on and on and on. Things men will never have to think about, unless they're a bad one who is trying to think of ways around them. But women are generally trained with some form of this from early teenage years.
I love men. But... I'd not worry if my skirt is too short, or some part of my bra (or even breasts curve) is showing (as a little too much skin makes many men's synapses short-circuit and their words and behavior turns a bit primitive and abusing). I'd go for relaxing walks at night, not afraid of being followed and raped. Whenever I went to a coffee shop, restaurant and any public/commercial place in general: I'd know I'd be talked to, and address as an equal, and not a potential sex partner (I hate being flirted by waiters and shop assistants. I try to be nice/polite to everyone, which is often misunderstood by men. Guys, I'm there for the product of your store, not for you/searching for a date! Can we focus and be a little more professional and respectful please? You wouldn't talk like that if I were a male costumer...). And so on.
Ljdia what
*(by sex partner I mean really sexual lover / sex object, not as a life partner or wife)
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As someone who worked in retail over a decade, were not that into you. You're just the customer in front of us. If you feel the server is trying to look down your shirt, they're not. It's just that the server is standing and looking at you while taking an order while your sitting down. If a server is being overly nice, they just want a tip. Same reason why female servers will flirt with male customers while they're splice and kids are sitting at the table. It's all about the money.
Of all the instances I can recall being attacked/assaulted/groped/etc by a stranger during my lifetime only 1 was a woman and 3 of those cases were done by "nice guys" whom I had to sue because of the trauma they caused me :P
I hope you won. No one has the right to treat you that way.
As a matter of fact I did win one :D The others are still going.
Sasha Kuleshov -
Yep, that's me, rolls down your tongue isn't? XD
Men ... let's kid-splane it for you. You have a palm size packet of M&M's. 1/3 of the M&M's will make you sick when you eat the whole packet. But you don't know which ones will make you sick, and which of the other 2/3rds of them won't. So to be safe, you have to assume the whole packet is bad and either proceed with caution or not eat them at all. So the 2/3rds of the nice guys are in the same packet as the 1/3 bad guys and we don't know which is which when we see you. It's not personal, it's a fact of life.
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So you just throw away the M&M's and eat licorice. Or maybe Snickers bars. Gummy bears. Forget the candy and go for ice cream. Tons of flavors and you can get it in a cone. Or maybe try to be healthy and have a piece of fruit instead? Or a protein shake. A smoothie! Steak has a good amount of protein. Or the ultimate - sushi. That's it because we all know Japanese guys aren't usually sex offenders. Sushi it is !!!!!
I think I understand the point of this post, at least I think I do considering that I am a male. I would like to point out that I have sexually harassed by women many times in my line of work. When I was in my early twenties, I had one woman in her thirties grab my balls, another in her forties tell me that the women at my work would like to see me take off my clothes, and another constantly propose unwanted sexual activities. I am a large man so I never felt directly threatened by these advances. Also, at that age, I thought it flattering in a backwards manner. Now I am in my late thirties and I look back in disgust at these experiences, and think how incredibly biased sexual advances are against men. Everyone thinks that men don't mind, and it's alright, which is skewed up.
Wrong is wrong in evey direction.
That was wrong of them, but did you ever fear for your safety? There's the big difference. Women have less social clout if they endure something like that and are more likely to be pegged as a 'problem' and get black-balled in the job market, and more likely to suffer real physical ramifications of saying no. Like death, assault and rape.
I am not comparing my situation to others, at least that wasn't my intent. I suppose reading this post brought these memories back, and I was just getting some things off my chest.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
yes, it can happen to everybody and society shouldn't have the stereotype that men don't care/aren't affected. many of them get harmed too. the only difference is that men don't feel threatened as much cause they can protect themselves very easily, but it still affects everyone, no matter your gender :((
That is wrong. I noticed a guy being harassed like that (nowhere near as bad) years ago and I didn’t do anything. I think if it were to happen again I’d say something. Maybe in a half-joking voice I’d say “let’s not sexually harass anyone” right when I saw it happening? What is the right way to advocate for somebody with the least embarrassment for everyone...?
I am so sorry that you underwent this.
I am so sorry for you, 'Toasty'. You should voice your opinions with your own name. Be bold, and always remember that God loves you. It may not seem like he's there, or you may have different religious beliefs, but he does.
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Toasty easy
If there were no men for 24 hours I would partially go insane because some of my besties are boys, and my dad is the HUMOR of this house
I agree. I love my male buds. However, that's not entirely the point of this post.
It said for 24 hours. If you can't go 24 hours without the company if these friends or you would go insane "partially", your grip on mental wellness is not strong.
Sounds like you have a great Dad. I'm happy for you.
Agreed my friends are boys and it will be very boring without them
You'd go insane without the company of some of your friends or your father for one single day? Wow - you might want to see a therapist about that.
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Thank you for being the only one to point that out. No men also means no fathers.
I'm hazarding a guess that you have perhaps had bad interactions/relationships with women and may have experienced abuse. I'm sorry if this has happened to you, and I'm hearing you that these issues are a two way street, in that men also are pressured/abused/have body image pressure etc. The issue in this instance is women have a significantly higher chance of this happening. Perhaps it would have been better to ask what ppl would do for 24 hours if 'predatory ppl' weren't here rather than 'men' as it's quite a big generalisation. In any case I hope you find someone you can speak with or some way of working through some of the abuse you may have experienced, and it may sound trite but it's not your fault, you don't deserve abuse, no one does. And no one should feel shame for being abused. The abuser should feel shame, not the abusee, regardless of gender. I wish you all the best Bob :)
For some of us 'no fathers' would have been preferable. Don't forget that a lot of abuse happens in the home. Some by women but it is still mainly men!
So....
I'm only young and absolutely terrified of a man walking up to me when I'm alone walking back from school and doing something bad to me! Also if there were no men for 24hrs I would wear something nice and walk around at night! Also us women have been overshadowed by men since like the dawn of the human race! That is why we are kinda scared of men!
There were some societies in the past where women were in charge or everyone was equal. Not many, and not sure there's any left today. Sad really. I'd say it's a cultural thing that's gone global, as opposed to a gender thing. In the sense that until recently women were expected to be subservient, but that not all culture had that. Iirc Sparta was one. Yeah it's shitty that most examples are 1500 to 3000 years ago, but it shows that a lot of it it's mentality and culture instead of gender
Now we should call those men snowflakes for daring to be offended....or maybe ask them what they are doing as good men to change the situation so women don't have to live in fear.
If you were a man what would you be doing to show that you are not bad walk up to a random women and try to tell them you are not bad. Well of course not it's only going to make them suspicious. I never know women's had to live in such fear so now I feel bad but you asked what men's are doing about this situation and......you can't really do anything about it
Zhaoheng, I didn't express myself very clearly. In America, we're having a conversation (finally) about the need for systemic change to fight racism, and we white people are finally realizing that it's not enough not to do anything racist, we have to help fight. I think men have that responsibility too. Make sure the female friend gets home safely. Speak up if male friends talk about women like they are objects to be conquered. Support laws that might help make things safer. Keep an eye out in a bar when someone might be moving in on a woman who's had too much to drink. Teach your son to respect women. Make sure you're respecting women. Consider whether you want to support politicians who don't respect women (that's a tough one, because both our major presidential candidates appear to be abusers.) We need allies, too.
I feel like it's male privilege that we talk about how we're afraid for our lives and you focus on how that makes you feel.
Decent men keep other males in line when they see something like this happening and don’t associate with males who don’t respect women. Most men are probably in this category, I think.
Agree - how confusing??
What it boils down to is: a small percentage of men are violent sexual predators, but 100% of women have to live in fear. You can't just look at someone and determine that they might harm you.
I would feel safe. My dad is not the nicest, if you know what I mean, and I would get to live how I would want to for once. Wear some sweat pants and just take my bike to the lake :)
That is sad, I hope you are able to move on at some point soon... not knowing your age. If it gets too bad please seek help or support. My dad wasn't nice either.
hunny?
I understand the desire of running at night. I chose not to do that, I live în the middle of the City and I would be worried as we had a case a but over a month ago when a guy tried to rape a woman running în the Park. With a woman you may talk but a man can over Power me. If a woman kicks me i kick back. If a guy kicks me I can Black out
I earned my black belt in Ta Kwon Do because I am five feet tall, weighed 120 and know I need to not underestimate anybody, anywhere because I have had two stalkers in my life. Before I earned my belt I was slammed against a car window, kissed so hard my lip bleed ,escaped because I got a handfull of hair and threatened to make him bald. All the way home with this monster I kept my hand toward his head. Why was I with him? My friend borrowed my car and told me this friend of hers would see me safely home.I never loan my car or let myself be in a place where I can't drive myself.
To all the men who commented - 95% of ALL aggression is perpetrated by men. Sure, sometimes it's against men, but it's still done by men.
Jo Firth what
Cite your source, don't just make stuff up. https://ncadv.org/STATISTICS 1 and 9 men are victims of domestic violence. That means over 10% of the male population has been a victim too and the majority of researchers believe these numbers are far under reported because of how society views men reporting abuse.
She is correct since she’s talking about at violent crime overall. Double check the DOJ Statistics page, but violent criminals are male 90% of the time or more. That’s surprising that 10% of men have been victims of domestic abuse. What percentage of the abusers were female and what percentage were male (I.e. in a same sex relationship)?
I didn't say domestic violence, I said ALL violence.
YES. THANK YOU.
Wow - you're determined to be butthurt about that fact that women experience violence by men.• "Females made up 70% of victims killed by an intimate partner in 2007, a proportion that has changed very little since 1993." https://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/fvv.pdf
Actually, Jo is correct. The figure Jo cited is the figure of violence globally. In the US, where I live, men are accountable for 85% of violence, while women are accountable for the other 15%.
Some years ago a book came out by Susan Brownmiller called "Against Our Will". I am not a "feminist" but many people considered this book to be a diatribe against men. It wasn't and it isn't. Brownmiller pointed out that rape is not an act of sex. It is an act of violence against women. She noted that rape is considered a "weapon" in many armies to be used against the people you are fighting. In some Muslim countries you cannot try a man for rape unless there are 3 male witnesses. The woman is always blamed, hence the "need" for women to dress "modestly." Regardless, rape is a weapon used against women. It has nothing to do with sex. Yes, there is "date rape" but, still, it is nothing more than a violent man using rape as a means controlling a woman. Not all men are rapists, the vast majority are not. But how do you tell?
So true. 90 year old women get raped. Babies, children and teens get raped. Men get raped. In most cases, it has nothing to do with sexual attraction or what she was wearing. Date rape means that he expected to get sex by taking her out. I was assaulted when I was 17, while on a date. When I said no, he got violent. I'll never forget him saying "You owe me. I spent money on you." I fought back (a 100 pound girl) and he tried to strangle me. I was able to get away from him when people heard me screaming and came to help.Then he acted like nothing happened. Date rape is a horror that I wish no one would ever have to endure. 😢
hey @BusLady Really sorry you had to experience the same s**t like me. By 'like me' I'm sure the're many more me's. Thanks for sharing and your first lines are shockingly but rhe truth
I agree with many of the comments. My husband does not automatically scan the parking lot coming out of a store at night, fear taking a walk alone late at night, know where the best lit areas are when working late at night.... He has no idea...
All the guys playing the nice guy card just think about this - if you're not holding the bad guys accountable for their behavior by ignoring or laughing at their actions, you're no better than they are. If reading the comments made you mad, you're probably part of the problem. Reading the comments made me sad, because nobody should have to live in fear.
Nice one Nathan.
Truly, thank you Nathan!
The post does not say that all men are evil. It asks what women would do if no men were around. The problem with specifying no evil men is that women have no way to telling the difference untill too late.
I'm scarred by men catcalling me when I was 13! I was walking home from school and passed by a construction site.
People really need to understand that wolf whistles and catcalls are not "compliments". I view them as sexual threats. It's not OK, and it needs to be fixed. This system needs to be turned around.
I have one question for the butthurt male commenters: How many times have you seen another man harassing or assaulting a woman—-who is very obviously NOT consenting to it—-and done nothing? Not prevent it when you saw the signs of it starting, not speak up or intervene as it was happening, and not even try to help afterward? How many times did you laugh along with the other men and make jokes about the woman’s mistreatment at the man’s hands? If you are guilty of any of those things then, YES, your complicity in the verbal and/or physical assault of women makes you a part of the problem. Heroes stand up and stop evil. Cowards do nothing.
1. If your initial reaction is “not all men,” please pause for a second so maybe you can learn to read and understand what’s not being said. 2. Perhaps a “I’m sorry that many women/females and males feel that way, what do you propose would be a solution to address that toxic culture? What can I/ we do to make you feel safer?”
'NoT aLL mEn' sonny I don't know you, how am I supposed to trust you aren't gonna attack me?
Liz yes
it's not about thinking that all men are bad. It's thinking that if all the men are gone, then that guarantees all the bad ones are gone and you are safe. Unfortunately you can't tell by looking at a man if he is a nice guy or a monster or something in between. So only with all men gone can you guarantee as a woman you are safe from being beaten, assaulted, raped or otherwise hurt by a man.
Yep. The people who scare me are other guys. I hate that some women may be scared of me just because I'm a guy, but I get it.
guys, seriously, don't be offended by this. LEARN FROM THIS.
Agreed.
Obviously even the not nice guys think they're nice guys. Women never know until you show yourselves. And you always end up showing yourselves. 90% of you are NOT nice guys. So accept the consequences of women being afraid of men in general. It is what it is. Don't like it? Listen and learn.
Personally, I would aspire to more than walks at night. There are a lot of laws and regulations that need a complete overhaul, and an all-female Congress could make it happen. I would make sure that the ERA, Roe v Wade, a liveable minimum wage, and all social safety nets became constitutional rights, as well as mandating that employers hire and pay equally, bake in paid maternity leave of an adequate length, and make rape that is proven beyond a shadow of a doubt an automatic life sentence, eliminating judicial discretion in it. Most importantly, I would ensure Trump, Pence, Graham, and McConnell are impeached AND sentenced AND tarred and feathered and run out of DC on a rail, and Trump and his family forced to pay back every penny he’s stolen from taxpayers. Not to mention eliminating the tax break for the wealthy AND overhauling the tax laws to ensure they pay their fair share, as well as seize all monies parked offshore. There’s a load more I would do, but don’t have the room or time here.
I'd vote for you.
Yep, excellent, but the article does only allow for 24 hours which is why people are focusing on some extra freedoms.
Motivated women can get a shitload of work done in 24 hours. Know why? We have common causes and come together to work on them—-the hell with our political differences.
Guys, I have to say I'm loving how the nice Pandas are DESTROYING the misogynist men (and unfortunately some women) commenting on this post.
I don’t know why some of the guys’ feelings got hurt. No one said all men were bad. If all men were gone, then all the bad ones would perforce all be gone. That’s all. It’s only slightly abstract and not personal. To cheer Bob up, I want to emphasize that we’re assuming all the bad women would remain behind, that women can be just as bad as men and that men and women should be treated equally under the law. Crime isn’t better because a women commits it. Men can be the victims of women and it’s wrong and they deserve to be supported too.
Exactly, I agree Tina, what they need to understand is that this post is about violence and abuse towards women which unfortunately is caused my men 98% of the time. That doesn't mean women don't commit crimes, we can make a different post about that and of course we would all support.
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So a female in your eyes is automatically viewed as nice no matter what even when they clearly state something inaccurate such as 95% of all crimes are committed by Men? But to you saying this is completely fine? You're part of the problem.
Dear Bob, why are you putting words in my mouth that I didn't say? Did you even read the comment? Are you saying that it was my fault being abused by men? Well, that just shows that YOU are the problem and that you are one of the misogynist people commenting on this post that would be better off using their free time to educate themselves.
I work in club security and I'm a guy I'm sorry guys but I have to agree with the ladies on this one. On averages its guys who get into fights and are a lot more likely to harm themselves and others on a night out and in general. Obviously not all men are club wielding cavemen but that's not the point. Imagine 1 guy walking towards 1 woman on a dark road at night after a night out now picture yourself as that woman who knows absolutely nothing about the guy approaching her It's that simple.
Loki Mo yes
Thank you Loki
I'm a 6'1" (186 cm) tall guy and weigh over a hundred kgs, and i'm not offended at all by this thread. I'm just so sad that so many people have to worry about their safety all the time. I know there are bad sides of every city where even i wouldn't go strolling around at night, but to find out that for so many of us that is EVERY side of town ALL of the time is just heart-breaking. Let's hope we can change the world for better for good. "You can never hold back spring" said Tom Waits - let's hope it's true.
I don't agree with this. I don't feel safe around both sexes and I've also been attacked by both. And I'm a woman. They were all not my doing and not my fault. I hear men say woman are bitches and I hear woman say men are assholes. I agree with both.
P. S. I believe it's human nature. But there are also good out there. But without knowing someone, truly knowing someone, it's hard for people to feel safe. I feel we feel safe around what we know and have experienced. Unless your very close-minded and judgemental lol.
Just because you PERSONALLY have a different experience does not negate the experience of billions of other women. Stop insulting other women.
I've read about lots of things like this. One of the reasons that we teenage girly like the men in these K-pop groups and stuff like that is because those men look more feminine and therefore seem less threatening. Another reason is that almost every teenage girl does not think of herself as beautiful, and hanging out with that kind of man would be more like hanging out with one of her friends. My aunt told me that she wants the dolls (that she gave my immediate family when i was little) back when she has a kid. She said that she still wants them if she has a boy so that she can teach him to be gentle with girls/babies/people-in-general through his whole life.
My son has my old cabbage patch doll, "baby doll".he has loved her for years and is her 'dad', looks after her and explains things to her. It's sweet as anything, and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. He has baby doll, he has nerf guns, Ken dolls and a Barbie, sports gear puzzles books transformers lightsaber...I could go on but you get the idea :) I so agree, both 'types' of you should be available to all genders. When I was a wee girl I loved my transformers and tmnt as much as my Barbie and baby doll
In the first sentence I said "girly". I meant to sat "girls", sorry.
Probably nothing different to what I do now as I live in a pretty safe country. But damn, I feel for all the women out there who aren't as privileged
TO THE MEN WHO GOT OFFENDED: If you are a good man then you make sure you watch out and protect the women you're around with.
Geoff, I know it’s not fair to hold all males to the highest standards. Some men are just naturally protective. Some women are too. Your only duty is to obey the law. If you see someone in danger, let any men or women nearby know that someone needs help. Then call the police.
Seven downvotes for me... four upvotes for blanc.... You people really don't get it, do you? You think having a man you love needs to risk his life to "PROVE" he's good? Will you feel better when he's dead because you TOLD him to man up and prove himself? There are just as many women guilty of toxic masculinity as there are men, because there are SO many women like blanc who think that a man's role in life is to face the things that women fear. You think guys are somehow magically immune to knives or guns? You think a guy who has never been in a fistfight in his life is going to beat up a mugger or a murderer? Your attitude is the definition of toxic. You hold the lives of the men in your life to be of lesser value than your own, and to me that's pretty much a sick perspective. You don't deserve love if you think the people you love should suffer for you.
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Interesting. So... as a man... my job is to risk my life fighting danger so women feel safe? If I get badly beaten or killed defending my wife, does that make me a "good" man? If I get a knot of terror in my stomach faciing down a mugger or murderer, is that ok because its my job to sacrifice my life for women? Women may no longer be afraid when men aren't around but I'm always afraid.... because society says I'm the one who has to fight when danger appears. If a woman suffers pain, its because men are evil... if I get injured or killed protecting a woman its ok because thats what I'm for.
that is not at all what she said. she said to keep an eye out and protect your loved ones because women aren't strong enough on their own against a larger, older predator male. would you rather live with the memory of your wife getting raped in front of you because your ego hurt so much from being told to be mindful of predators that you just couldn't tell a guy to 'f**k off' for once? if you see a man following your wife/daughter/gf/coworker/friend/relative/etc just take her somewhere safe, escort her so she isn't alone. don't go out and randomly attack suspicious people but if someone is following or abusing a female, step up and take action. as a 'good guy' you need to prove it. sitting around and watching doesn't make us feel safe and that's the point of this post. men won't ever understand the fear and danger we live with, so just try to help for once
I don't know how you got "I have to risk my life" from "protect the woman you're with".
Me just wondering men's what would you do if all the women's were gone for 24 hours???
You would have some men complaining that they can't go that long without sex, housekeeping and child care.
hahahahaha😂😂😂that's probably true
It's horrifically sad that we as women feel this way. It's a serious shame that men, even the "nice guys" don't get it. I was followed to my car once, in broad daylight! I got on my phone immediately to let others know I felt threatened. It's scary that we're scared. Men.. please try to understand!
Honey -
There is no right or wrong answer to this question. Are all men bad? Absolutely not. Do women have to be careful around them? Yes. We can't tell from just looking at you whether you are cool or not and it's better to be safe than sorry. An example of this is my father. He is a very big and imposing man. Now I know that he is kind and gentle and his bark is worse than his bite. However, there are probably some women who have come across him and been frightened and that's OK. You know why, it's OK? Because they don't know him like I do and are just protecting themselves. Instead of getting offended because of this article, let's start a conversation about how to help women from feeling this way. We can also start a conversation about how to get young men to stop getting caught in the "nice guy" trope. If we have these conversations then we don't have to worry about these kinds of questions.
Men need to understand that women KNOW the vast majority of men are not a threat, but we also know if we misjudge who is and isn't a threat we will end up dead. So yeah, we do fear men in general because the ones who ARE a threat aren't wearing name badges.
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1: then say it in the OG post so it's know 2: admit men are abused just as much but it's not reported at the same rate. 3: Understand women are abusive as well and in some cases cause more harm physiologically then men so just getting rid of men won't make you safer. 4: there are multiple cases of women being charged for murder by control meaning they manipulated a man so much they killed themselves.
Bob, do you raise awareness of male abuse victims in general, or do you only bring it up when it's in response to women talking about their abuse? Because that seems to be a thing about talking about how we're abused, men like you stomping your feet because men are abused too. Yes, they are, try writing your own post about that. You have the freedom to raise awareness for these issues without using them to detract from this one.
Every single man who feels offended by the comments made by women should ask himself whether he is totally innocent. Maybe he hasn't directly harassed or bullied or attacked a woman, but maybe he's enabled another person to do so. Or, hasn't spoken out against physical/psychological violence against women.
I'm offended as a gay man. The title should read straight men. I fear straight men being violent. I keep a low profile on purpose. How many trans women are killed by straight men. How many gay men have been attacked by straight men. Remember Matthew Shepard? I'll never forget.
yeah, it's terrible how the LGBTQ community is attacked, and usually only by straight men/women
As a gay man, you get gay and bi men just like this. With over half of my male cis and trans friends being sexually assaulted at some point before age of 25, some before they were 16. Why does the post offend you?
This is a good point.
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I suggest you read the Wikipedia article on Matthew Shepard.
Go braless, have better job opportunities without making 30% less than half the population, on average, enjoy the night, travel alone (if I had the $). Just... breathe a sigh of relief. Hopefully. PTSD still strong after 20 years from an abusive, raging, cruel stalker ex. I’m only now starting to get comfortable hearing the phone ring, get texts, hear the doorbell, look at my email - only intermittently. It’s hard on those I have contact with (two adult kids and a friend) because I can only handle these things for short periods. It’s awful. It’s about 15%-20% better now. Makes life pretty impossible. Being a target to be destroyed left permanent scars. I wish I could be free of it.
I shouldn’t have clicked on this at 10 after midnight.
Mishte Tine haha
Why is it that men don't get that by some men, women are seen as weaker and easier targets. Yeah, Chad 6ft1 athlete probably isn't gonna have men picking fights with him, but Cindi 5ft3 petite is probably gonna feel a lot more vulnerable than Chad does and more at risk of attack. Secondly, why do guy's recommendations, martial arts,rape alarm, phone tracker, not going out, being chaperoned, covering up all skin. Why should women sacrifice freedoms so that men aren't tempted to rape? Why not teach men that rape is wrong instead? Why put financial burden and psychological burden on the victim? Finally, why do some guys act like they should get a certificate for not being a rapist? not being a rapist =/= being an amazing person. We don't routinely thank people for not stabbing us. Why? Cuz it's the bare minimum acceptable behaviour. You need to do a lot more to be a decent person, than not commit atrocities. It's a start, but don't ask for a pat on the back it looks grim af lads
This is the best thing about getting old - if you're a woman, you become invisible and are no longer seen as prey. Yes, we're all aware that "not all men". But the men that do see women as prey tend to have a disproportionate effect on a LOT of women. Does anyone actally think that each sex offender has only one victim in his entire lifetime?
I’m different. I feel I get more respect now that I’m older. And I think my younger self was looked on an object of admiration, not as prey. I’m not invisible; if I need to get someone’s attention (Like at a business) I get it. Otherwise I ignore casually everyone and they ignore me, but that’s just normal for everyone where I live
It's really sad that those men who commented were angry that women were scared 😥 Of course we know it's not all men.
Sonia Lorraine love
I am disgusting reading this, and I, myself am a young woman. It's so sad that all these women had to be brainwashed by the bad guys, they got so traumatized they can't even look around to see the good guys and the bad girls. Also, it is sadly more common for women to experience physical or sexual violence, however, some men out there experience it too. Please do not think every man is a threat, please do not think every woman is an angel. I want people to raise their kids correctly, please teach them to respect both women AND men. Life is full of so much sexism twords women & men. Kids grow up around all this toxic s**t.
If you assume a guy is a good guy you open yourself up to rape, assault or death. If you assume he's a bad guy, you open the door for a pleasant surprise. Women aren't perfect and clearly there are violent ones out there, but statistically, men hurting women is the overwhelming majority. If you think it is just that women can't open their eyes, you might want to start with yourself.
No one has said all men were dangerous. No one has said half of all men were dangerous. Your use of the term “brainwash” is both condescending and incorrect.
I'm very sorry, Tina. I didn't mean to offend anyone. What I meant was a lot of these women who participated in this were most likely hurt by men in their life, that's what made them think that way. There are a lot of evil men out there, those evil men hurt girls then those girls can never see the light again.
Yes, yes, and yes. This is a good point. Thank you, Isabella R.W.
first off, im a woman, and i dislike men to some extent. no, let me make that a bit more specific. i dislike those men who think women are toys and belong in kitchens or as 'things' and straight out take advantage of them (hopefully not all the guys reading thi comment will be offended because i specified it) second of all, even women are capable of mistakes... not just men.. im a feminist.. i support gender equality to such an extent that i even almost yelled at a member of my family for saying that 'that is a mans job' so men and women are equal third, this twitter tread just said that 'IF there were no men' so it was just asking womens opinion and yes some of them did sound offensive, but if those men who feel like they want smthn frm women or might end up doing smthn bad gazed down or looked away from women, then they wont do anything bad... i am talking abt BOTH men and women...
and if they want to feel safe even with men around, i would suggest every one to wear smthn coveering... i am not asking to change clothing style, just a suggestion to feel safer from gazes and all that.. so please dont hate me... 😣😥😓😓 and finally, if there were no men, for 24 hours, i would just stay at home and play games alone xD or go for a walk like i usually do, cuz it would make no difference to me since i usually talk to boys anyway... (please dont take any thing i wrote to heart, i only wrote what i wrote to express my thoughts and stuff and yes, some men are at fault here to some extent but not all of them... and the clothes part, i was just trying to help girls feel safer if they are uncomfortable staying on the streets... so please dont hate me or anything...i am extremely afraid i will get some harsh replies... ) 😣😖😰
Why should women wear unattractive or large clothes just to make men not rape. Rapists doing the evil, they should change, not women
No offence, but telling women to wear something different isn't helpful. My friend was sexually assaulted wearing jeans and a t shirt, I was wearing a maxi skirt and blouse. It makes no difference, and it's victim blaming to suggest if a woman was wearing something different she'd be safe.
You're entitled to your own opinion, we all are. What is right for one person may not work for someone else, including clothing choices. Posting a comment online is risky no matter which way one's opinion leans. Expect some negative feedback. That being said, it's sad that you are so afraid of harsh replies. Not because of your opinion, but because many commenters are angry and reactionary. We get upset about other's posts, believing we're entitled to verbally attack each other. Would we react the same way face to face? Not likely. I have noticed commenters are realising we've all been too quick to judge and condemn those we don't agree with. We are progressing because rational people remember when civil discourse was ... civil. Respecting others online is becoming more prevalent. You can see it in this thread. Choose your battles wisely. Sometimes, the best comment is no comment at all. We talk too much and think too little.
Natalie KS Good response!
To men who think 'it's women's responsibility to protect themselves.' How about you try fighting off an attacker with double your strength, dealing with constant harassment in public, being belittled in the workplace and having your bodily autonomy turned into a political issue, and THEN talk about who's really responsible?
Elsa May -
I think a lot of men genuinely don't realise how much women are taught to modify their behaviour in order to keep ourselves safe. We are told from an early age not to walk home alone, to carry your keys in your hand in case you're attacked, to not wear revealing clothes, to take a photo of the cab number plate, to watch no one spikes our drinks, let friends know where you are going on a date...this list goes on and on. We have to do these things as if we don't, and bad things happen we are victim shamed. We know that it's not ALL men, but the problem is that SOME men behave in a way that means we have to treat ALL men we don't know as a potential risk. W
I'm a guy and let me just say this: "A true gentleman don't play the blame game".
Here's the perspective of a tall, masculine, mostly white, gay bloke. I'm nocturnal and a fast walker. I don't know how to act when I see women out at night. I don't want to make them anxious, but I can't shout out, hey I'm not going to rape you, I just really need a wee, don't like girls sexually and not a rapist. Because, that's not a normal thing to say to anyone. I've had many an encounter with guys who will just grab you, and when you threaten to punch them if they do it again, act like you're being unreasonable and that they're just being friendly and thought I'd take it as a compliment. Many guys on many networking apps and sites, assume that as you're into guys, you'll obviously be into them, and start the chat by sending highly explicit pics and videos. Or they'll try to charm you with a highly detailed chapter long text about all the things they'd love to do to you, in their first message. These guys usually think that because they sent you nudes, you owe them nudes