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Mom Demands Teen Move Out After Her 18th B-Day, Dad Uncovers The Selfish Reason Behind It
Mom Demands Teen Move Out After Her 18th B-Day, Dad Uncovers The Selfish Reason Behind It
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Mom Demands Teen Move Out After Her 18th B-Day, Dad Uncovers The Selfish Reason Behind It

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Your 18th birthday marks a new beginning. You’re no longer a kid, and most young adults go off to college or leave the nest to start building their own lives. However, that’s not a rule, and recently, the trends have shown the opposite. A 2023 survey revealed that nearly half (45%) of young adults in the U.S. are still living with their parents.

But not all parents want their grown-up kids around. Like the mom in this story, who unceremoniously let her daughter know that she expects her to move out once she turns 18. The dad, blindsided by her decision, found himself between the cold-hearted mom and the panicking daughter. Curious to know how the family drama unfolded? Read on and find out!

RELATED:

    It can be hard to decide what the best way for your teenager to transition into adulthood is

    Image credits: Nicole Michalou / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    However, parents should make these decisions together – something that this mom decided not to do

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    Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Karolina Grabowska / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: itsssathroway

    Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    No rule says that teenagers should leave the family home at 18

    Whether a child moves out at 18 or a few years later, it’s a big adjustment both for the parents and the child. The debate about whether or not children should leave the home nest when they’re legally of age really has two sides.

    Some parents believe that kicking your 18-year-old out of the home is kind of an outdated concept. As of 2023, a third of young adults in the U.S. are still living with their parents. And more than half see only positives in this.

    64% said that it considerably helps their financial situation. In fact, in 2021, there was a conspiracy floating around on Twitter (X) that children moving out of their parent’s house as soon as possible was all a scheme by the banks to make more people pay rent. 55% of the respondents claimed that it also helps them maintain a better relationship with their parents.

    However, asking a kid to leave the family home is not something parents should spring on their children. There are things teenagers should know so they can successfully transition into adulthood. These include basic financial skills, knowing how to make a basic meal, cleaning, home management, and personal healthcare.

    Perhaps even more important is the emotional and mental preparation. And that’s not just about preparing them for the move by discussing it ahead of time. Teenagers who move out should have basic problem-solving skills so they can deal with minor life challenges without help from their parents.

    Experts also note that it’s important to teach teenagers to set goals. Sitting down together and going over long-term and short-term plans will make the parents feel less stressed and the teenager more grounded.

    Image credits: Julia M Cameron / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Parents need to make parenting decisions together

    Another major problem in this story is the lack of communication between parents. The mom and the dad should discuss decisions like this together. After all, they are both equally parents to the daughter.

    However, it’s easier said than done because parenting differences can be difficult for couples to overcome. Jaclyn Gulotta, PhD, LMHC, claims that parents disagreeing on parenting can lead to more conflict, emotional and physical disconnect, lack of trust, and changes in behavior.

    So, parents must try to overcome their differences in order to be a united front. Talking things out and listening to each other is crucial in these circumstances. Dr. Gullota recommends parents determine the rules for their kids together. That will not only solve the problems but show the children how emotionally mature adults handle a difference of opinion.

    But disagreements and more heated conversations should never take place in front of the kids, even if they’re teenagers. “If parents argue in front of their children, this can also cause miscommunication, and the children may feel there is a lack of stability or feel insecure in the home,” Dr. Gulotta explained.

    When parents disagree on a parenting decision, it can cause children stress and anxiety. In some cases, kids can even start taking advantage of the conflict and start favoring one parent over the other. “Think of parents as the ‘captain of the ship,'” Julia M. Chamberlain MS, INHC, LMHC, explained. “If there were two captains of a ship and the crew witnessed them not in agreement about the course of action, it can cause anxiety for the crew.”

    The dad gave more context in the comments about what the daughter’s plans for the future were

    People decided unanimously that the dad wasn’t the unreasonable one

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    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    Read less »
    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    What do you think ?
    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm 55. My parents have ALWAYS been there for me, financially and with living space. When I needed to, I was always able to go home, no questions asked. My parents even bought me a house several years before I was arrested. You all may not know this, but a lot of landlords don't want to rent to ex-cons. I couldn't find any place to live when I got out of prison. My parents ended up buying this house for me, and having my uncle do the work to make it accessible. Just like with the other house (which they sold easily), I pay the mortgage as rent. Dad passed recently, but when Mom goes, I inherit my house. I can't imagine how much more difficult things would have been several times in my life without that safety net.

    Cosmikid
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is what "family" is supposed to mean. Robert Frost wrote a long poem about it- "The Death Of The Hired Man". The line that sticks with me; "Home - is where- when you have to go there - they have to take you in."

    Load More Replies...
    James016
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We saw from another post on here what happens when you kid your kid out at 18 with no warning. They become homeless and have to find shelter wherever they can. Then they resent you and want nothing to do with you. Anyway 18 is an arbitrary number for legal reasons. It does not mean an 18 year old is ready to live independently.

    Negatoris Wrecks
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom did this to me. I'm still recovering and I'm 36.

    Susan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm so sorry. I hope you found a good support system in friends or extended family.

    Load More Replies...
    R Dennis
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I moved out at 16. Supported myself and did what I had to do to get myself out of poverty. I have given my stepkids and daughter the same rules: You have free room and board as long as you are going to school or working - if no school, then working should be towards a path of financial independence. All of the adults have boomeranged back once - I told them all they always have a home as long as I have one... We had a couple of their friends live with us because their parents kicked them out at 18 (one on their birthday). I couldn't imagine that level of cruelty.

    Susan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good on you for being a safe space! My mom was the same with with me and my sisters, as well as a few of our friends. I don't know how they managed it but as a parent now I've got a ton of respect for them.

    Load More Replies...
    Tams21
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Being a mother does not suddenly stop being a thing when a child becomes an adult. Forcing an 18 year old to move out before they're financially and emotionally ready is incredibly poor parenting, doing so to have space to pursue a hobby isn't parenting at all.

    DC
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Replace wife. Or just don't have a wife anymore.

    Libstak
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wasn't ready to move out until I was 22, I was back a year later and giving my parents the same rent I had been paying plus helping with shopping and utilities. They saved my rent and I had a tidy downpayment on a small house by 26....that was when things were not so tough in the rental and housing market, today, what was a nice bonus for me should be normal for households where parents are not themselves struggling to make ends meet and own their own homes imo. Also, today it was a no brainer that I would be carer to them, dad has since passed but I still have mum and I do my best to keep her out of care homes being dependent on strangers who might not care enough.

    Sandy D
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This so called mother just suxx! She's putting stupıd hobby over her daughter's well being & her future. It's bad enough realizing how little you mean to your parents My brother and I got the boot the day after graduation. We turned 18 during our final year of high school. It would have been difficult to impossible to finish high school and work the full time and the extra part time job it would take to survive while finishing school. Booting a kid out before they can even finish school just shows your kid that she means little to nothing to that parent. I admit that this bugs the 💩 out of me, because of my experience of being unwanted. If you're just gonna throw your kid away, don't have em

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keep the daughter, kick out the wife. Now off you go...

    Nadia Caerleon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That mom was doing the bare minimum required and there is some long brewing resentment there. Methinks mom is mad that the daughter popped out.

    Load More Comments
    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm 55. My parents have ALWAYS been there for me, financially and with living space. When I needed to, I was always able to go home, no questions asked. My parents even bought me a house several years before I was arrested. You all may not know this, but a lot of landlords don't want to rent to ex-cons. I couldn't find any place to live when I got out of prison. My parents ended up buying this house for me, and having my uncle do the work to make it accessible. Just like with the other house (which they sold easily), I pay the mortgage as rent. Dad passed recently, but when Mom goes, I inherit my house. I can't imagine how much more difficult things would have been several times in my life without that safety net.

    Cosmikid
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is what "family" is supposed to mean. Robert Frost wrote a long poem about it- "The Death Of The Hired Man". The line that sticks with me; "Home - is where- when you have to go there - they have to take you in."

    Load More Replies...
    James016
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We saw from another post on here what happens when you kid your kid out at 18 with no warning. They become homeless and have to find shelter wherever they can. Then they resent you and want nothing to do with you. Anyway 18 is an arbitrary number for legal reasons. It does not mean an 18 year old is ready to live independently.

    Negatoris Wrecks
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom did this to me. I'm still recovering and I'm 36.

    Susan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm so sorry. I hope you found a good support system in friends or extended family.

    Load More Replies...
    R Dennis
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I moved out at 16. Supported myself and did what I had to do to get myself out of poverty. I have given my stepkids and daughter the same rules: You have free room and board as long as you are going to school or working - if no school, then working should be towards a path of financial independence. All of the adults have boomeranged back once - I told them all they always have a home as long as I have one... We had a couple of their friends live with us because their parents kicked them out at 18 (one on their birthday). I couldn't imagine that level of cruelty.

    Susan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good on you for being a safe space! My mom was the same with with me and my sisters, as well as a few of our friends. I don't know how they managed it but as a parent now I've got a ton of respect for them.

    Load More Replies...
    Tams21
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Being a mother does not suddenly stop being a thing when a child becomes an adult. Forcing an 18 year old to move out before they're financially and emotionally ready is incredibly poor parenting, doing so to have space to pursue a hobby isn't parenting at all.

    DC
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Replace wife. Or just don't have a wife anymore.

    Libstak
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wasn't ready to move out until I was 22, I was back a year later and giving my parents the same rent I had been paying plus helping with shopping and utilities. They saved my rent and I had a tidy downpayment on a small house by 26....that was when things were not so tough in the rental and housing market, today, what was a nice bonus for me should be normal for households where parents are not themselves struggling to make ends meet and own their own homes imo. Also, today it was a no brainer that I would be carer to them, dad has since passed but I still have mum and I do my best to keep her out of care homes being dependent on strangers who might not care enough.

    Sandy D
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This so called mother just suxx! She's putting stupıd hobby over her daughter's well being & her future. It's bad enough realizing how little you mean to your parents My brother and I got the boot the day after graduation. We turned 18 during our final year of high school. It would have been difficult to impossible to finish high school and work the full time and the extra part time job it would take to survive while finishing school. Booting a kid out before they can even finish school just shows your kid that she means little to nothing to that parent. I admit that this bugs the 💩 out of me, because of my experience of being unwanted. If you're just gonna throw your kid away, don't have em

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keep the daughter, kick out the wife. Now off you go...

    Nadia Caerleon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That mom was doing the bare minimum required and there is some long brewing resentment there. Methinks mom is mad that the daughter popped out.

    Load More Comments
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