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Lady Has Had Enough Of Her Husband’s Regular Whining About Nearly Everything, Vents Online
Being a sensitive person isn’t exactly easy; it can be painful to deal with unkind words or to struggle with judgment. Unfortunately, sometimes these kinds of folks can also become extremely thin-skinned and make their issues everyone else’s problem.
This is what one woman had to face for years because her husband kept getting offended over the tiniest things, which forced her to strictly control everything she said in front of him. Eventually, she couldn’t take his behavior anymore and desperately asked people for help.
More info: Reddit
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When one partner has to keep adjusting or changing themselves for their loved one, it can end up becoming very tiresome
Image credits: SkelDry / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that she had grown up in a very unkind family, which is why she had found her husband’s overly sensitive relatives very refreshing and endearing
Image credits: SkelDry / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Later on, the woman got tired of her husband’s fragile nature, as he kept getting offended or giving her the silent treatment based on normal things she said or did
Image credits: Drazen Zigic / Freepik (not the actual photo)
At first, the woman did her best to respect her husband’s feelings, but eventually, she realized that his rude behavior would often get a free pass while hers did not
Image credits: ThrowRA_ancientbass
One day, when the man got offended on someone else’s behalf, the poster realized that she was tired of always walking on eggshells around him
As the poster mentioned, she grew up in a family where people said hurtful or insensitive things, which is why she was used to that kind of behavior. On the other hand, her husband and his loved ones were quite sensitive people who felt everything very deeply, which was very refreshing to the OP.
Growing up as someone who feels things very strongly can also be advantageous, as it helps folks connect with others more easily and understand their emotions better. Researchers explain that although there are many benefits to being a sensitive person, it can also be a struggle, as others might be on a completely different wavelength.
This is exactly what began happening between the poster and her husband as well, since his extreme touchiness over everything started getting on her nerves. Even when she made simple jokes or said anything that he didn’t like, he would either give her the silent treatment or lose his temper.
It might seem reasonable for the man to voice his discomfort to his wife, but experts explain that when one partner is always taking offense in a marriage, it can be a sign of manipulation. This is because it is often a way to shift responsibility from themselves and put the other individual in a position of discomfort.
Image credits: zinkevych / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Over the years, the woman began to feel afraid to voice her opinions or say anything that might set her husband off. She knew that he would easily get offended, and that’s why she had fearfully given him free rein, which allowed him to say the most judgmental things about her and her family.
In tense situations like this, relationship advisors explain that people should learn to identify these red flags in their partner and set boundaries as soon as possible. The best way to do this is by first talking to the other individual about their behavior, and if nothing changes, to set consequences for their actions.
Even though the woman tried her best to make her husband aware of her discomfort, he just didn’t seem to realize how his oversensitivity was affecting her. He also started getting riled up over other people’s problems, and that’s when the OP began feeling exhausted and unsure what to do about her marriage.
Once the OP asked people for help, many folks mentioned that her husband should probably get therapy since his sensitivity was causing so many issues for her. They also urged her to stay strong against his manipulation and not to give in to him so easily, which might be easier said than done.
How do you think the woman should deal with her husband’s fragile nature? We’d love to hear your thoughts on this story and any advice you might have.
A lot of folks found the poster’s husband exhausting and told her to get away from him as soon as possible
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What do you think ?
Alexandra 3 days ago
This husband sounds so exhausting. If you let him, he will force you into a burnout or worse. You're only 23, you have lots of time to find someone who's actually compatible with you. This one is definitely not. Don't flatter yourself with thinking it will get better because it won't. Your primary responsibility is to yourself: stop hurting yourself and return this husband to the wilds whence he came from.
Binky Melnik 3 days ago
I can’t fathom how she made the choice to yoke herself to him permanently. **I’m** emotionally exhausted from having read this! I’m trying really hard to understand why he and his family are like this; what do they get out of it? People fawning over them trying to placate them? Is it a f****h? It sounds as if they must be miserable all their waking hours. I don’t know what motivates them. I usta be a lot more uptight, imagining that people didn’t like me, that I offended them, that sorta nonsense, and one day a therapist friend asked me “Why do you think they spend so much time thinking about you?” That was the slap in the face I needed. I think this guy and his parents could also use a slap in the face … with a tire iron. She’s already got a baby and doesn’t need a bigger one. That poor girl.
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Heffalump 8 hours ago
Husband is taking offense as a method of control. His behaviour is not over-sensitive, it is a*****e.
Crystalwitch60 6 hours ago (edited)
That’s the feeling I got as well, some of the stuff she describes sounded exactly like coercive controlling shite like his needs are all that matter, and e ermine was fall to his feet and lick his boots kinda thing, yeah not happening !
Load More Replies...
sweet emotion 3 days ago
They are raising a child who will believe that husband's "sensitivity" is normal behavior - reinforced by the fact that Grandma behaves the same way. LW needs to get her husband into therapy or take the child and get out.
Alexandra 3 days ago
This husband sounds so exhausting. If you let him, he will force you into a burnout or worse. You're only 23, you have lots of time to find someone who's actually compatible with you. This one is definitely not. Don't flatter yourself with thinking it will get better because it won't. Your primary responsibility is to yourself: stop hurting yourself and return this husband to the wilds whence he came from.
Binky Melnik 3 days ago
I can’t fathom how she made the choice to yoke herself to him permanently. **I’m** emotionally exhausted from having read this! I’m trying really hard to understand why he and his family are like this; what do they get out of it? People fawning over them trying to placate them? Is it a f****h? It sounds as if they must be miserable all their waking hours. I don’t know what motivates them. I usta be a lot more uptight, imagining that people didn’t like me, that I offended them, that sorta nonsense, and one day a therapist friend asked me “Why do you think they spend so much time thinking about you?” That was the slap in the face I needed. I think this guy and his parents could also use a slap in the face … with a tire iron. She’s already got a baby and doesn’t need a bigger one. That poor girl.
Load More Replies... Heffalump 8 hours ago
Husband is taking offense as a method of control. His behaviour is not over-sensitive, it is a*****e.
Crystalwitch60 6 hours ago (edited)
That’s the feeling I got as well, some of the stuff she describes sounded exactly like coercive controlling shite like his needs are all that matter, and e ermine was fall to his feet and lick his boots kinda thing, yeah not happening !
Load More Replies... sweet emotion 3 days ago
They are raising a child who will believe that husband's "sensitivity" is normal behavior - reinforced by the fact that Grandma behaves the same way. LW needs to get her husband into therapy or take the child and get out.
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