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Hey Pandas, What Is The Strangest Parenting Choice You’ve Ever Seen?
Parenting is hard, and every generation of parents thinks they have it figured out. What are some weird parenting choices you've seen that leave you confused? They may be valid; they may have worked, but what's something that kind of broke your brain to see in action? No hate on this thread, please.
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The strangest parenting choice I see is parents refusing to give up smoking.
Not trying/struggling to quit (kudos to those who are trying!) - outright REFUSING.
They also tend to be the people I hear claiming they’ll ‘do anything for their precious child’ - except quit smoking.
I find that very strange.
I only knew one person like that. Most would find the smell of cigarettes too nauseating through pregnancy and it would sort of carry forward but i used to work with a woman that straight up powered through and took it as a challenge. Ironically she's the only coworker who did eventually quit. All the others went back to it after a few years. She had a reality check after a cancer scare and realised it would aftect more than just her.
- not vaccinating their kids
- parents that spoil kids
I am very pro-vax and I abhor the anti-vax movement... but i have compassion for parents that don't openly dissuade others or suggest they know best but choose not to vaccinate their kids. I always pursued science in school so I used to have little compassion for people ignoring scientific evidence and holding onto pseudo-science masquerading as science because, for me, the difference was obviously. Now I realise that it's obviously if you know how to read studies correctly, you look for particular qualifications and certain words. Mary and Joe trying to do right for their child don't 'know' what journals to look at, what degrees to rely on. They see 'Dr.' And 'scientific evidence' and it looks legit. It is awful any way you slice it, but I know that very few parents set out to prove a point, they simply got advice from bad sources and didn't know any better. There needs to be greater scientific literacy taught in school for people regardless of science courses taken.
So I adore my nephew, he's great, his parents are amazing... but. I was very very confused when from day one they didn't do a crib. Newborn to toddler, no cribs thank you. He slept on the ground so that they could do the Montessori sort of thing from the very beginning. Essentially when he'd wake up, he could just crawl (once able to) to his toys (most of which talk and light up) and play instead of (to me) learning how to self soothe at night, he just entertains himself and keeps himself more awake. Before he could crawl, they put toys near him so he would just reach out and play.
Every morning once he could crawl, they would wake up to his toys all by his Montessori bed. When I was a toddler (back in my day lol) I was switched from a crib to a Montessori bed but my toys were in a chest at night so there wasn't much to stimulate me, I just had a couple of plushies. When I was not quite 3 I was given a reading light and so i would wake up and read books-- a far cry from flashing, musical activity centres.
Maybe it works maybe it doesn't but it definitely confuses the hell out of me.
Probably the woman that decided to dress up her son and 3 daughters in weird homemade sailor themed suit & dresses, like some nautical version of 'The Sound of Music'.
Weirder still, she thought that that look would perfect for capturing in photos for posterity. Holding some insane belief that people would look at them one day in the future and think, 'wow, what a great picture! They look great!', when the reality is that it looked terrible then, and will always look terrible.
What were you thinking ma?
Tell your kid to help you with chores when they try to go to a friend’s house, then complain you have no friends and need more when you’re reading.
If you’re talking about yourself I’m sorry. Do you need to vent? If you’re not comfortable that’s totally fine, and if you want to make it private my email is c6794862@gmail.com
A friend of mine used to go to a church where a mother of one of her friends didn’t let her kids say butt. Not just “butt” but “but” too. My friend’s last name is butler and the mother wouldn’t even let her kids say the name properly. Those poor kids had to call her bottomler until they moved away.
The neighbors behind my house are WAY to tolerant of the child (6?) she will be screaming and punching and biting her parents and instead of disciplining her they just no thank you. Like I’m all for being nice to your kid but you still need to discipline them.
People who use guilt to "teach" their kids things. It really messes them up and they don't develop healthy social skills because they were essentially shamed for "not knowing already" and left alone to figure it out.
I once saw a twitter post which showed a thumbnail for a YouTube video showing a young boy looking sad while his mom holds his report card while looking at the young child sternly. There is an arrow that is pointing to the young boy’s report card.
This basically leans into families that vlog their life on YouTube without the consent of their (underage, not 18+ kids). I watch a few YouTubers that have kids and they rarely mention them, or if they do, blur their face to respect their privacy/refer to their child by a nickname. Moriah Elizabeth is a mom of two and her first daughter is referred to as “Mini Me” by her fans. Her second daughter is referred to as “Minier Me” by her fans.
My parents love me and want me to have fun/be happy (but not to the point of spoiling me) but my friends parents don't let them hang out more than a few times because they already had enough fun for the week???? Like oh you went to starbucks yesterday you can't hang out with your friends today? And it's not money related its just . . . spite? ig? it seems to be common in my friends but I find it weird.
My mom is cutting me off from life outside my house. I am not allowed to have a phone until I am 16, and she started homeschooling me in kindergarten. I have missed so much that I am afraid to go to middle school. Luckily she decided that I can go to real high school and college. (7th grade now)
Having a child diagnosed with a learning disability before kindergarten and deciding to ignore said disability and basically throw the child to the wolves, metaphorically speaking, and have that kid suffer the cruelty and suffering that accompanies bullying and being laughed at while at school and endure emotional abuse at home. This decision also leaves your child wondering if there is something wrong with them and frustrated that they cannot get things as easily as others.
Discussing the possibility of your child being autistic with the boss of your adult child, but not the adult child who has to learn that you think he is autistic from said boss. And when the adult child, on his own accord, goes and gets tested and your suspicions are proven correct, you question why the person bothered getting tested since there is nothing anyone can do for you.
Belittling the academic achievements of your child and when they ask for help or encouragement you instead tell them their problem is that they are not mature enough.
Laughing and making fun of your children so much that they are at the point of tears. Belittling and denigrating your child’s career choices because you are jealous of them. Blaming your children for your poor decisions in life.
Qualifying every accomplishment your child has done.
Claiming your child is selfish and mean and telling possible romantic partners that your child needs a mother, not a girlfriend.
