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“Farting In Front Of A Partner Leads To A Stronger Relationship.” “Crying Can Help You Lose Weight.” If these headlines sound like enough of the internet for you today, let me tell you, we've only started.

Thanks to the “Funny News Headlines” Instagram account that collects some of the worst, most bizarre and plain stupid news headlines, we have quite a collection to facepalm at today. Beware not to drink any beverages while scrolling through, since the chances of spit-take are really high.

With 231k followers, the account is gaining popularity every day, and you can see why. For anyone who appreciates the absurdity of our everyday life, this one is a treat you’ve been waiting for. Psst! More of the worst newspaper headlines await in our previous post.

#1

This Is Beautiful

This Is Beautiful

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Don Golosso
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe he was really bad. In Dutch we'll call off key singing or playing "kattengejank" or cats crying. So maybe that's how he got his new audience...

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After scrolling through this post, you may wonder what on earth the journalists, writers, and content creators were thinking to come up with such absurd headlines. Some of them are surely made out of pure bluntness, but others… they make you wonder. So in order to find out more about the art of headline making, we spoke to Lina Survila, an editor in chief of “Abstract Stylist” online magazine who has years of experience of working in press.

Lina started off by saying that getting your headline clicked is hard work. “Unfortunately, editors are often pressured to bring better results with each article, so headline wars have become the real deal today."

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It turns out that there's a fine line between an informative headline and a fake one, Lina argues. “First, we all need to know that headlines play a big role in Google's ranking magic. Every editor has a wish for their article to reach the top position, meaning more clicks if a user is often searching for it.”

“So because an editor wants to reach more people, they end up using trendy keywords which result in misleading headlines,” Lina explained and added that it happens more often than you’d think.

#7

Legend

Legend

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Buren
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope there is a way for him to do things he loves. Nursing home shouldn't be prison

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Meanwhile, the news headlines sometimes “sound a little harsh sometimes, as they're spoiling all articles for everyone. But poetic, beautiful headlines often don't capture the essence of the text, so people who are used to reading their news fast don't take time to appreciate it or click to see if this article is something in their interest.”

The problem is that nowadays, anything can be called news, according to Lina. “An elephant giving birth is news, a funny story about a chicken is news. It gets people's attention. You can’t blame them. If this is the content they read and actually click on it, editors will have to produce more of it.”

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However, fake news is something that should be taken more seriously. Lina explained that “clickbait headlines often mislead people, and those who do not bother to open the article might mislead other people too by spreading the wrong message. For example, recently, I read that K. Reaves is married to Winona Ryder, well, it was stated in the headline, and actually, they were married in the movie.” Lina said it’s a good example of how misleading a headline can be, and in fact she would call it a case of “fake news.”

#13

He Just Respects Mother Nature

He Just Respects Mother Nature

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cybermerlin2000
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The boss nods with admiration and says, "You have to come in after the kids have gone to school. I'm doing the same"

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#18

This Kid Is Ahead Of The Game

This Kid Is Ahead Of The Game

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#19

Get Me There

Get Me There

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Don Golosso
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Simpsons did this too! But they added barber floor hair when people came to the fire to get high.

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#23

Oooof

Oooof

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September Meadows
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

After this happened several people, who climbed Everest, and happen to be vegan, came forward and said it's been done, not realizing themselves it was such a big deal. Her autopsy showed she died of starvation. She wasn't consuming enough calories to keep up with what she was burning. You have to be eating constantly doing such things.

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#26

Same

Same

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J. F.
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She changed clothes and forgot that the description fitted her previous outfit IIRC

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#27

Got To Make Sure

Got To Make Sure

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#33

No Wonder They Taste So Good

No Wonder They Taste So Good

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Rijkærd
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love the websites name. THEREISNEWS.COM well theres news for real.

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#36

I Don’t Think That’s How It Works...

I Don’t Think That’s How It Works...

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Dorothy Parker
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Genetically possible even if parents appear White. Mom's response, though...oh my.

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#37

That’s A Lot Of Divorce Papers Right There...

That’s A Lot Of Divorce Papers Right There...

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#38

Hey Panini

Hey Panini

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Robert T
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If he looks like a panini, why did they use a picture of a cheese and ham toastie made with sliced white bread?

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#40

That Cat Must Feel Like A King

That Cat Must Feel Like A King

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#42

Big Mood

Big Mood

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John L
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I shouldn't ask, but did he win? It's America, afterall....

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Donkey boi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now to fair to Mc D's, they never called it a 'Make you happy meal', they were stating that the meal itself was happy.

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Vasana Phong
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What? Is this the same guy that tried suing Red Bull because he didn’t “ grow wings”

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Casey Burns
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Of course McDonalds is still gonna be depressed. Think of all the obesity they've caused.

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Thorfin Wolfsbane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

not positive, but pretty sure "happy' is not the antonym for 'depressed', because while I'm not happy, neither am I depressed.

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Adrian
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Happiness is! If you consume happiness, then it isn't. Should've gone for the IKEA meatballs.

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Kara Jam
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why does the drive thru sign kinda look like the Hershey’s bar

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#44

Not All Heroes Wear Capes

Not All Heroes Wear Capes

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Paul Macdonell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The ham and Pineapple pizza or known as an Hawaiian pizza was invented 40 years ago in Windsor Ontario. I love it but don't know why.....

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#45

Imagine

Imagine

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Daniel (ShadowDrakken)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, you'd think you'd have figured it out by 6 months: "Hey, how come my puppies aren't growing? Shouldn't they be almost full size by now?"

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#46

I Like His Jeans

I Like His Jeans

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Robert T
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well she got to keep Rambo, but I can't find any footage of Rambo on the quadbike. https://twitter.com/i/events/812031134632509440

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#48

Very Helpful Drawing

Very Helpful Drawing

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#49

Ironic

Ironic

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September Meadows
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Blood doping is unfair in sports but it's a boon when traveling! Did it in the military, no jet lag, super easy time zone adjustments, and getting climatized to a tropical environment from a winter temperate one was no problem, barely an inconvenience.

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#50

There Goes My Hero

There Goes My Hero

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Note: this post originally had 83 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.