Woman Manages Bulk Of Finances And Housework, Fiancé Expects Her To Babysit His Kids As Well

Every relationship has its ups and downs, which is often what helps strengthen the bond between both partners. It only starts becoming a problem when one person’s moods dictate the entire relationship, and the other individual has to constantly keep adjusting.

This is what one woman faced after moving in with her fiancé, only to be treated like the babysitter, breadwinner, and maid. Unfortunately, since the man sometimes behaved kindly and other times rudely, she often felt at a loss whether to stay with him or end things.

More info: Reddit

When one partner keeps controlling what the other person says, does, or even where they go, it is often a red flag in a relationship

Man smiling while holding daughter indoors, showing fiance babysit daughter hunting family bonding moment.

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The poster explained that she moved in with her fiancé because he insisted on being closer to her and that he didn’t like it when she visited her home

Fiancé babysit daughter while he goes hunting, woman feels distant and struggles with relationship challenges.

Text about a fiance who goes hunting often and leaves without babysitting or communicating about the daughter’s care.

Text message exchange describing fiancé losing dogs while babysitting daughter, causing worry and upset feelings.

Man in hunting gear using walkie-talkie outdoors, illustrating fiance babysit daughter hunting scenario.

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The man also went hunting every Sunday and would keep his fiancée in the dark about his whereabouts, which would often leave her upset and worried

Fiance babysits daughter during weekend visit as she sleeps in their bed while he rests on the couch.

Text excerpt about fiance babysitting daughter and weekend plans involving hunting discussed in a casual conversation.

Text about fiance babysit daughter hunting, describing a conflict over spending time alone with kids before marriage.

Young woman babysitting daughter in kitchen, folding clothes together, bonding during a calm home moment.

Image credits: lookstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Since his daughter was due to visit soon, the man expected the poster to babysit his kid while he went hunting, and got mad when she refused

Text excerpt about a fiance refusing to babysit daughter during hunting trip, leading to argument and him leaving the house.

Text about stress working from home and managing housework while fiance babysits daughter and goes hunting.

Alt text: A person expresses frustration that their fiancé never says thank you or offers help while babysitting their daughter during hunting trips.

Text excerpt expressing feelings of being unappreciated and exhausted while fiance babysits daughter after hunting.

Text excerpt showing a fiance babysit daughter hunting for signs of distant behavior and emotional withdrawal.

Text expressing confusion about a fiance being super nice, funny, and loving while babysitting daughter during hunting.

Text excerpt discussing challenges in a relationship involving a fiance babysitting daughter and cultural issues.

Text describing a person feeling conflicted while their fiance babysits their daughter, reflecting on relationship struggles.

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The poster also explained that she had to manage the home, her work, and take care of her partner’s kid, while also dealing with his mood swings 

Since the woman had moved in with her fiancé, he made sure that she didn’t go home too much and told her that he would miss her a lot if she went away. Even when she suggested going to visit her friends and family, the man got angry and asked her if she thought she could just leave whenever she wanted.

According to therapists, when your partner tries to keep you from your loved ones, it’s often a sign that they are trying to control and isolate you. This is a potential warning sign of a toxic relationship where one person might be trying to take all the power and wants to dictate what the other individual should or shouldn’t do.

The OP also mentioned that since her partner used to go hunting for hours every Sunday, he expected her to just wait for him to return and not leave the house. Since his daughter was visiting him for the weekend, he told the poster to babysit her, even though the little girl wasn’t told a single thing about their relationship.

When a person keeps their partner a secret from their children, it’s often a sign that they might not be taking the connection seriously. If they don’t make an introduction within the first few months, it might be due to fear of how the kids and their significant other will bond, but after a while, it’s important that they do what’s needful.

Fiance comforting upset woman on couch during a serious conversation about babysit daughter and hunting plans.

Image credits: drobotdean / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Apart from the troubles in her relationship, the woman had also been under a lot of stress because she had to manage her work, look after the household, and also take care of her fiancé’s son. It didn’t seem like her partner was helping her with any of the tasks on her plate, and that made her feel undervalued and exhausted.

What also concerned the woman was how often the man’s moods changed because he could go from being loving and romantic to extremely rude and distant very quickly. This made her extremely confused because she didn’t know how to handle his changing emotions and what could set him off.

Experts state that this kind of moody behavior can stem from a person’s own problems and insecurity, but if it happens too often, it might be a form of manipulation. If someone is always becoming distant when they don’t get their way, they might be doing this to make their loved one feel guilty so that they comply.

Despite all these issues, the woman felt like she couldn’t possibly leave her partner, and she explained that doing so would be frowned upon in her culture. Since she had been married before and it didn’t work out, leaving her fiancé now could ruin her family’s reputation, which she didn’t want.

What advice do you have for the OP, who’s dealing with such a tough situation? Do share your thoughts in the comments below.

People urged the woman to get out of the toxic relationship and go back to her family as soon as possible

Comment criticizing fiancé’s behavior in a babysit daughter hunting situation, describing controlling and guilt-tripping actions.

Text advice about fiancé babysitting daughter and dealing with financial a***e and isolation in a difficult relationship situation.

Commenter explains refusing to babysit fiancé’s daughter while he goes hunting is reasonable due to unfair emotional labor.

Screenshot of an online comment mentioning a nanny and maid after a jackpot, related to fiance babysit daughter hunting topic.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing relationship issues and respect, related to fiance babysit daughter hunting topic.

Comment advising a girl to leave her fiancé who exploits her as a babysit daughter hunting and isolate her from family.

Alt text: Reddit comment discussing fiance babysit daughter, questioning family dynamics and roles within the household.

Comment discussing issues with fiance babysitting daughter, describing control and unequal family dynamics in a hunting context.

Screenshot of an online comment saying "NTA" and discussing a fiance babysitting daughter while hunting.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing fiance babysitting daughter and emotional reactions during a conversation.

Comment discussing a fiance babysitting daughter, highlighting emotional labor and relationship concerns in an online forum.

Comment expressing concern about a fiancé's role as a babysitter and the dynamics in the relationship.

Comment on a forum post criticizing the fiance babysitting daughter while hunting, expressing disagreement and relationship advice.

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