Woman Shocked As Dad Complains About Her Daughter Ordering Expensive Meal While He Was Paying

It's one thing to order lobster and expensive champagne on someone's tab, and a completely different thing to order a diner fired steak. Dad is cheap af. I would give him back the $15 or so that it cost, and pay for my own meals from now on. He can keep the passive agressive comments to himself.

The father is wrong: there is no such rule. There is the unspoken agreement that you don't pick dishes that are obviously expensive, but if the host orders a salad then you are free to order fish fingers. Not a lobster though. I don't think the father really knows about etiquette: if he did, he would know that you never comment on the choices your guests make when you invite them to dinner, be they family or not. That's considered bad hosting.

absolutely not acceptable for him to do this. first he grumbled bout it which is passive aggressive as hell then stewed on it and then full on talks down to his granddaughter about a rule he never ever discussed prior. if he cant afford it, he should stay home and if it were my kid, she wouldnt be visiting anymore until an apology from him was issued.

I would've paid him for both of our meals since his pocket is clearly tight and not visited for a while. This type of thing annoys me. if there’s a price limit, be clear beforehand not complain about it after.

There can be an element of respect and etiquette involved, between adults, particularly strangers/new acquaintances. There are several ways I might deal with it. One would be to not mention that I'm going to pay until afterwards, so folks can just order whatever they want and would normally choose. In some situations you specifically want to make it clear that you're paying, so sometimes I will pick one of the more expensive items on the menu and make sure I mention the fact, so if I'm paying 50 francs (roughly 60 US dollars, and yes, welcome to Switzerland) for a fillet steak then they'll not feel constrained to order something at the cheaper end just to avoid the cost. It's up to me as the host to make sure any 'rules' are clearly understood.

The rule makes sense in a lot of situations - but this doesn't appear to be one of them. Seems gramps forgot the rule about not baiting a social trap and then acting upset over a chicken fried steak.

He's a landlord and cheap. I feel for all those people renting from him. Bet he is a stereotypical awful landlord. Never heard of getting a dish that's cheaper than the person who paying. I've only heard don't get the most expensive items. A 15 year old is thinking "I'm hungry, what should I get?" The grandfather sounds controlling and Mom should rethink bringing her daughter around because how he yelled at her could be the start of abuse. Remember just because people are related doesn't mean they need to have a relationship.

And the OP specified he ordered a small meal. So he was expecting his guests to do the same and go hungry?

So in his world, the payer must always order first, and then allow all the others more time so they can adjust their order to be less than the payers? How is this even the least bit practical? In that case, the payer must always announce to the rest of the table exactly what they've decided on and either how much it costs or where it is on the menu so the guests can now be informed of the price limit. Gramps didn't do that. He's the j.e.r.k.

When anyone asks me out and choses the place I must assume he or she is able to afford the prices. If it turns out the price is a problem I would of course offer to pay my share, but maybe not have anything much to do with that person again, because I would feel cheated.

You don't wait until after the fact to voice your opinion on someone else's meal choice. He should have been a Richard Head right on the spot and told his granddaughter what she was allowed to eat FFS! I wouldn't be bringing her back until he can behave himself.

The other thing is someone ordering f*cking chicken fried steak at a diner set him off so much that he was passively aggressively grumbling under his breath and then went off on them about it later. This wasn't lobster or filet mignon. Was this a Michelin starred chicken fried steak because, JFC, IT'S CHICKEN FRIED STEAK. It's peasant food, essentially and doesn't really cost that much more than a regular meal at most places that serve it.

In general, I agree with the rule. Always order something priced in the middle when it's someone's treat. Taking advantage of others' generosity is rude and crass. But in this incident, unless the chicken fried steak is the most expensive item on the menu, I'd say Dad is losing his bits.

She should have given the cheap b@stard a $10 bill then never gone back. Obviously, if it meant so much to him he would have given this "lesson" to his daughter and it would not have been a surprise to her when the 💩 hit the fan. Personally I'd never eat a piece of toast in that guy's house that I didn't bring myself. Oh, and I wouldn't take my daughter there to be subject to that nonsense.

The etiquette rule is you order something from the middle price point or lower unless your host orders something expensive. Then you can order anything equal or less than your host.

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Generally speaking, if you are eating on someone else's dime, the considerate thing is to be frugal. If they take you to task for it, and suggest you order something more, that's fine, you can up the ante a bit. But a lot of people would find it rude if you order the priciest thing on the menu without a second thought.

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First of all, chicken-fried steak isn't a breakfast meal. There are breakfast sandwiches, breakfast wraps, pancakes, eggs & bacon/ham options. That's the range OP's daughter should've chosen from. Second, it's true that the guests should order food similar in type and price to that of the host.