Mom Fuming As Her 12 Y.O. Daughter Isn’t Invited To Wedding After Ruining Another One Before
Let’s imagine that you are preparing for your wedding. What can go wrong in preparation? The answer is whatever can! Absolutely, and this is really no joke – from relatives who dislike your wedding venue (or enjoy it too much – that happens as well), to guests at the bachelorette party who literally turn the night into an MLM event.
You say that many problems can be prevented? Of course, they can – just always keep in mind you also have relatives who may well perceive your attempts to prevent a problem like Michael Jordan from The Last Dance. Remember this: “And I took it personally!” Well, the user u/Low_Detail_798 also had no luck with his cousin, or rather, with her daughter.
The author of the post is going to tie the knot with his fiancée soon and they’re busily discussing the guest list
Image credits: Matheus Bertelli (not the actual photo)
The newlyweds-to-be are going to let the guests bring their children – except one of their relatives
Image credits: Low_Detail_798
Image credits: Gregg Tavares (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Low_Detail_798
The problem is that this woman’s 12 Y.O. daughter is really spoiled, according to the author, and ruined her aunt’s wedding two years ago
Image credits: Rezk Assaf (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Low_Detail_798
The couple decided to not invite the teen – and took a lot of flak from the girl’s mom
Well, the Original Poster is going to tie the knot with his fiancée, and in the process of discussing all the nuances of the upcoming wedding, they came to the decision that they would allow guests to bring children with them. Firstly, as the author of the post himself admits, his relatives have always adhered to the concept of “family first” and “family is everything.” And secondly, most of the kids who are expected at the ceremony are well-raised enough and will arrive with sitters so the parents can enjoy the festivities.
But there are always exceptions to every rule. And in our story, such an exception is Cerrie – the 12-year-old daughter of Linda, the original poster’s cousin. As the author of the post himself says, his cousin is a pretty entitled and selfish person, and she raised her daughter the same way. For example, a few years ago, Cerrie completely ruined her aunt’s wedding by throwing a tantrum and destroying the wedding cake – simply because another kid acted as the flower girl.
And so, the groom-to-be decided to play it safe, so the invitation that he and his fiancée sent to Linda included only the names of her and her husband, but did not say that the wedding could be child-free. Of course, the mom immediately got livid and in a personal conversation with the author, spoke in such a way that not inviting her daughter to the wedding is completely outrageous and unacceptable.
The original poster, in his turn, honestly and bluntly said that after the incident at the previous wedding, he did not want something like this to happen again, so he and his fiancée would be glad to see Linda with her husband (oh, it seems to me that the original poster is being a bit bogus here!), but not their offspring. The result was that the angry mom gathered a whole coalition of her friends and a few relatives who sided with her who started bombarding the groom-to-be with wrathful texts, trying to influence this decision. But for now, the OP is holding on, and so is his fiancée. We just wish them perseverance…
Image credits: Deesha Chandra (not the actual photo)
“Of course, the bride and groom are absolutely in their right here, because this is their wedding, and it is up to them to decide who they want to see there and who not,” notes Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment on this situation. “Well, an attempt to manipulate the opinion of the newlyweds through their relatives and friends is generally inappropriate. Which in fact only emphasizes how smart a decision this couple really made.”
“Of course, if this woman’s daughter threw a fit at a wedding two years ago, this does not mean at all that the situation will repeat itself now. After all, at this age, two years is a very serious time span. But the author’s concerns are quite understandable, and he, of course, is in his right. If there are some psychological issues here, then the help of a specialist is needed. If she’s just spoiled, then therapy is unlikely to help,” Irina summarizes.
As for the commenters under the original post, many of them were much more peremptory, arguing that the best solution to this problem would be not to invite the cousin and her family at all. However, the original poster replies to this that, given the life creeds of his relatives, then even those of them who initially sided with him and his fiancée will definitely subject them to a real flurry of criticism. And we all know perfectly well what family principles are, and what people are capable of under their influence…
But about the cousin’s daughter, the OP wrote that, despite her mother’s numerous statements that “she’s just a little girl,” for comparison, the daughter of that very bride whose ceremony Cerrie ruined two years ago is half her age, and behaves like an angel. However, most commenters still strongly support the author’s decision, although some point out that it looks more like a ‘justified [jerk] move’ on his part. So what do you think of this case, our dear readers?
However, most of the commenters sided with the groom-to-be, although some of them admitted it’s a ‘justified jerk move’ on his part
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Respond to all the text messages saying that as long as the parents promise to be financially liable for anything that their daughter does at the wedding by paying double for anything the tween destroys then she can come. If they can't promise that, then people will know that they can't control their daughters destructive behavior. If they do promise that, then you either get a quiet wedding or more money for the honeymoon.
Although I understand she's NTA at all, she did lose me when she stated her cousin is just as bad but still invited. Since her family is already upset she should just uninvite her cousin and her husband, too. I can see she won't, though, just the child. It comes off as cowardly. I'm sure the cousin will be causing more of a scene at the wedding in retaliation. So, she just rip off the band-aid and say f**k the lot of them.
Also, the child is as much family as her parents, so applying the "it's family!" argument to them and not to her is really unfair.
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We see altogether too many stories in which people Marshall their friends and family to gang up on somene who they perceive has done them wrong, giving the many younger posters here the idea that this is acceptable behavior. IT IS NOT. I don’t know what’s wrong with these people that they think they can do this (the one time I did this, I was in the second grade), but it is unequivocally WRONG. DO NOT exhort your friends to apply pressure to people n your behalf. Do not involve others in your petty (and not-so-petty) squabbles. Deal with your difficulties like an adult. Pretend to be an adult if you have to. This is the behavior of the stupid, the un- (and under-) developed, the low class, the poor in spirit, the unkind, and the unimaginative. DO NOT lower yourself. Have some grace. And by all means, when you see posts about people doing questionable things, don’t think that because it’s been reported that it’s acceptable! Be better than what you read about. These people are disgraces.
Respond to all the text messages saying that as long as the parents promise to be financially liable for anything that their daughter does at the wedding by paying double for anything the tween destroys then she can come. If they can't promise that, then people will know that they can't control their daughters destructive behavior. If they do promise that, then you either get a quiet wedding or more money for the honeymoon.
Although I understand she's NTA at all, she did lose me when she stated her cousin is just as bad but still invited. Since her family is already upset she should just uninvite her cousin and her husband, too. I can see she won't, though, just the child. It comes off as cowardly. I'm sure the cousin will be causing more of a scene at the wedding in retaliation. So, she just rip off the band-aid and say f**k the lot of them.
Also, the child is as much family as her parents, so applying the "it's family!" argument to them and not to her is really unfair.
Load More Replies... We see altogether too many stories in which people Marshall their friends and family to gang up on somene who they perceive has done them wrong, giving the many younger posters here the idea that this is acceptable behavior. IT IS NOT. I don’t know what’s wrong with these people that they think they can do this (the one time I did this, I was in the second grade), but it is unequivocally WRONG. DO NOT exhort your friends to apply pressure to people n your behalf. Do not involve others in your petty (and not-so-petty) squabbles. Deal with your difficulties like an adult. Pretend to be an adult if you have to. This is the behavior of the stupid, the un- (and under-) developed, the low class, the poor in spirit, the unkind, and the unimaginative. DO NOT lower yourself. Have some grace. And by all means, when you see posts about people doing questionable things, don’t think that because it’s been reported that it’s acceptable! Be better than what you read about. These people are disgraces.
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