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49
Mom Of 3 Under Fire After She Shares What She Got For Her 12-Year-Old Daughter For Christmas
Christmas is coming, and with it, many people have already begun their holiday shopping. This year won’t be so different from 2024, as Americans plan to spend an average of $1,007 on gifts. Some folks are even sharing their holiday gift hauls online, but one particular woman got more attention than most.
Just a few days ago, user @theresaontheclock shared a video showing the presents for her 12-year-old daughter under the Christmas tree. Yet, the video rubbed a lot of people the wrong way because of how many items the child was getting. Hence, a discussion broke out in the comments about overconsumption and spoiling children with gifts, as the commenters divided into two camps.
RELATED:
Many parents spend the majority of their Christmas budget on gifts for their kids
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
This family with their three kids has always celebrated Christmas in a big way
Image credits: theresaontheclock
But recently, the mom went viral for sharing what she planned to put for her 12-year-old daughter under the Christmas tree
Image credits: theresaontheclock
Over a million people watched her video, and many had strong opinions
@theresaontheclock What i got my 12 year old daughter for Christmas 🎄 **I store and wrap in my unfinished basement, so don’t mind the background 🥰** #whatIgotmykids#christmas#haul @abercrombiekids @Kendra Scott @White Fox Boutique @Woojer ♬ original sound – TheresaOnTheClock
Image credits: Helena Lopes / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Over-gifting can lead to children becoming entitled and overly materialistic
There are few things as magical as waking up on Christmas morning to open presents together with your siblings and family members. Even as adults, it’s probably the part of the holidays that most of us remember and look forward to the most.
The commenters who sided with the mom were right: nobody can tell a parent what to gift or not to gift to their children. Similarly, no one can tell a person how much they’re allowed to splurge on themselves. And yet, those who raised concerns made a good point, too: there is such a thing as over-gifting, especially when it comes to children.
On average, American parents spend about $461 on Christmas presents per child. When it comes to the quantity of gifts, the majority (51.4%) buy their children around two or three gifts. 4.2% of American parents say they give their kids 10 or more presents each. Another 2022 study found that parents spend around $220, and the highest budgets are for kids aged 7 to 12.
However, Mark Joseph, the founder of the parental advisor Parental Queries, explains that over-gifting might lead children to develop a sense of entitlement and a lack of appreciation. “Overgifting can be a real issue. It may lead to children becoming overly materialistic and expecting too much from gift-giving occasions.”
Image credits: Yan Krukau / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Some parents implement the “X gift rule”
To make the decision of how many presents are just the right amount, some parents implement certain rules for Christmas gifts. There are several models; for example, the “7 gift rule.” It includes something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read, something to do, something for me, and something for the family.
If that seems like too many, parent educator at The Parenting Center at Children’s Hospital New Orleans, Lisa Phillips, MSW, LMSW, suggests the “4 gift rule” that has been making the rounds on social media since 2022. Choose gifts from the first four categories: something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read.
“There’s no clear cut answer to this question [of how many gifts], but many parents worry about overindulgence during the holidays,” Phillips added. For pre-teens aged around 12 to 13, experts recommend focusing more on gifting experiences where children can spend time together with friends and family. That includes tickets to a sports game, a museum, or a concert.
Image credits: Antoni Shkraba Studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Some parents may not be able to afford heaps of Christmas presents
It seems like parents can never win. If they shower their kids with love by getting them many presents, they’re bad parents. If they only give them one or two, they’re accused of being Scrooges who hate their children.
Maggie Dent, Australian author on parenting and education, sympathizes with parents. “We now live in a very consumerist society and parents and kids are heavily marketed to.” Christmas, according to her, is “the perfect time to teach children and teens the joy that comes from giving to others. So maybe get them involved in baking or making something special for neighbours or others in your community, especially people in need.”
Indeed, not every parent is able to provide their kids with 10 or more presents. “Consider your personal values and be realistic about what you can afford,” educational psychologist Elanna Yalow, Ph.D., says. “Make a list with your child about what they want and prioritize it based on your child’s interest—and your judgment.”
Some called her out for the excess: “A child doesn’t need this much stuff!”
Others defended her: “I would’ve absolutely loved this when I was 12”
In another video, the mom also shared what she got her 17-year-old daughter
@theresaontheclock What I got my 17 year old for Christmas 🎅 * I store and wrap in my unfinished basement * #whatigotmykidsforchristmas#christmastok🎄#teengiftideas#haul @Kendra Scott @White Fox Boutique @aerie @DANDY ♬ original sound – christmas sounds 🎄
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What do you think ?
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
LOL, well. I'm over here laughing (not in a good way) that this woman called the gaming vest her daughter's "big gift" when there were ALSO two different pairs of Uggs that each cost $95, a thermal hair brush that costs $100, SEVERAL pieces of jewelry that cost $75 - $90 each, an interchangeable-stone necklace set that costs $150, and Steve Madden DIY purse kit that costs $180. (The vest costs $300, btw.) I think I got some socks and a couple of books the Christmas when I was 12. This mom can spoil the hell out of her kids, of course, it's her money to do with as she will, but one does marvel at the brazenness of posting on social media about just how much expensive junk you bought your pre-teen for Christmas. Personally, I'd have loved to see the mom maybe leave one or two items off the daughter's gift pile and donate some toys to children living in poverty instead, but that's just me.
Crystalwitch60 1 month ago
And me to couldn’t have put it better myself , this is way ott, more money than sense some people ,
Load More Replies...
CK 1 month ago
More presents doesn't equal more happiness. It can actually take away a child's ability to really enjoy any of them.
Earonn - 1 month ago
Your reply became only visible after I've written mine. Funny that we basically said the same thing. Everyone, CK said it first!
Load More Replies...
Corwin 02 1 month ago
30ish gifts on average around $50 , with some topping $100 , can we say spoiled rotten. Sorry rules in our house are maximum two gifts per person and no more than $50 total for a person. It is supposed to be a token of appreciation , not a avalanche of gifts that for the most part will not be used. Mommy needs to learn to not spend $1000's on c**p
JoRo 1 month ago
I just looked it up and the Summer Friday's vault is £200 alone. That's an insane amount for lip balms!
Load More Replies...
Cla Ida 1 month ago
The first item really is "hey fugly your face is IMPERFECT and it shouldn't be, you HAVE to be pretty". The rest isn't super cool either. Idk when I was 12 I liked putting on a bit of make-up, but playing or developping interests, skills, hobbies is crucial. It's sad to confine her daughter to her appearance.
monsieur mabel 1 month ago
...people are gonna people and respond to internet posts and sometimes it's not what the poster wants to hear.....look at me look at me but say nice things , maybe not post 🤔
Antoinette the Red 1 month ago
Yes, there be some backlash on her post and the OP isn't going to be happy about it. She definitely will come out with a follow up to "defend" her choice. But, that is just what it is, her choice.
Load More Replies...
Michael MacKinnon 1 month ago
Am I the only one here thinking the overall effect is...heavily reinforcing gender norms? Like, I guess mom should know her daughter's preferences on gifts, but it could also be trying to move things in a not so subtle way.
Margaret H 2 weeks ago
For probably the first time in my life, I almost agree with Donald Trump. Too much. Far too much.
Sparky Hughes 4 weeks ago
I am so curious what she buys throughout the year. When my parents were together, we got used to using what we had and wore what clothes we had. Then Christmas we would have a ton of gifts. Around 70% were things we needed. Think new shoes, clothes, bed sheets sometimes, toothbrushes, etc. We were under 13 and I can assure you, those gifts made the quantity seem excessive. I remember trying to open the clothes and that stuff first to end with a bang & excitement with things I really wanted. But this is quite a haul.
Sparky Hughes 4 weeks ago
I want to add the using what we have mentality is still ingrained in me. I can afford things but am satisfied with what I have.
Load More Replies...
Sally Moen 1 month ago
I used to envy girls in school who got similar girly stuff: makeup, stuff that fixes hair, jewelry, and little if any sport-related or educational toys. What I lacked in that I still have: bicycling and hiking and camping and outdoor skills and interests. Would be great to have a diamond necklace but I know how to setup a campsite and can roast a hotdog on a fire
Far_Rhubarb7177 1 month ago
Ugh…this reminds me of how my two nieces have been raised. They’re young women now, but for their entire lives, their parents have given them EVERYTHING, and then some! On top of that, their grandmother (my mom) has also spoiled them rotten, constantly giving them LOTS of $$$$. And they don’t even need that money, since their parents have always given them lots of cash, too. Each girl received a Rolex watch upon turning 15 And they don’t even wear the watches! When the younger one was about to turn 18, she dictated to everyone that since this would be her “last birthday during high school,” it had to be extra special, meaning that everyone was expected to pony up lots of expensive gifts or lots of money. Entitled much?! I mean, they’re my nieces and I love them, but they’re spoiled on a level that’s unprecedented for our family!
Annika Kremer 1 month ago
I was such a tomboy at 12 (still am, for the most part, let's not kid ourselves here), so it was sort of interesting what more feminine girls are into.
Lara Verne 1 month ago
It remind me of so-called Boo baskets (Halloween gift basket) trend. I saw how woman made one for her daughter. It contained a lot of overpriced Sephora skincare/makeup products, designer bag, Stanley cup with accessories, overpriced ugly Ugg shoes...etc. It cost over 1000 dollars. Her daughter was 6 years old....
Rachel Reynolds 1 month ago
Every year we ask the 3 boyz if they want a "big" Christmas or if they want a special experience and a small Christmas. They have chose the experience.
Tyke 1 month ago
The amount of presents is obscene. On top of this... she's posted this on thicktok? Surely her daughter's going to see it and will know all her gifts anyway. The whole thing is ridiculous and she's raising a spoilt brat.
KatSaidThat 1 month ago
I really hope they donate these to charity when she gets bored of them and moves on to the next big thing.
Antoinette the Red 1 month ago
You must, moggiemoo, since you took time to read it AND comment.
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Me neither. I had to Google a lot of it, honestly XD I recognized the Uggs because my mom went through a period of time where she was OBSESSED with them when she was in her 70s, for some odd reason, but that's about it. I can also tell you that, as a lifelong gamer, I would HATE something like that Woojer "gaming vest". It apparently vibrates along with whatever is happening in the video game you're playing. I play a *ton* of video games and I can't image how weird and distracting that would be XD
Load More Replies...
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
LOL, well. I'm over here laughing (not in a good way) that this woman called the gaming vest her daughter's "big gift" when there were ALSO two different pairs of Uggs that each cost $95, a thermal hair brush that costs $100, SEVERAL pieces of jewelry that cost $75 - $90 each, an interchangeable-stone necklace set that costs $150, and Steve Madden DIY purse kit that costs $180. (The vest costs $300, btw.) I think I got some socks and a couple of books the Christmas when I was 12. This mom can spoil the hell out of her kids, of course, it's her money to do with as she will, but one does marvel at the brazenness of posting on social media about just how much expensive junk you bought your pre-teen for Christmas. Personally, I'd have loved to see the mom maybe leave one or two items off the daughter's gift pile and donate some toys to children living in poverty instead, but that's just me.
Crystalwitch60 1 month ago
And me to couldn’t have put it better myself , this is way ott, more money than sense some people ,
Load More Replies... CK 1 month ago
More presents doesn't equal more happiness. It can actually take away a child's ability to really enjoy any of them.
Earonn - 1 month ago
Your reply became only visible after I've written mine. Funny that we basically said the same thing. Everyone, CK said it first!
Load More Replies... Corwin 02 1 month ago
30ish gifts on average around $50 , with some topping $100 , can we say spoiled rotten. Sorry rules in our house are maximum two gifts per person and no more than $50 total for a person. It is supposed to be a token of appreciation , not a avalanche of gifts that for the most part will not be used. Mommy needs to learn to not spend $1000's on c**p
JoRo 1 month ago
I just looked it up and the Summer Friday's vault is £200 alone. That's an insane amount for lip balms!
Load More Replies... Cla Ida 1 month ago
The first item really is "hey fugly your face is IMPERFECT and it shouldn't be, you HAVE to be pretty". The rest isn't super cool either. Idk when I was 12 I liked putting on a bit of make-up, but playing or developping interests, skills, hobbies is crucial. It's sad to confine her daughter to her appearance.
monsieur mabel 1 month ago
...people are gonna people and respond to internet posts and sometimes it's not what the poster wants to hear.....look at me look at me but say nice things , maybe not post 🤔
Antoinette the Red 1 month ago
Yes, there be some backlash on her post and the OP isn't going to be happy about it. She definitely will come out with a follow up to "defend" her choice. But, that is just what it is, her choice.
Load More Replies... Michael MacKinnon 1 month ago
Am I the only one here thinking the overall effect is...heavily reinforcing gender norms? Like, I guess mom should know her daughter's preferences on gifts, but it could also be trying to move things in a not so subtle way.
Margaret H 2 weeks ago
For probably the first time in my life, I almost agree with Donald Trump. Too much. Far too much.
Sparky Hughes 4 weeks ago
I am so curious what she buys throughout the year. When my parents were together, we got used to using what we had and wore what clothes we had. Then Christmas we would have a ton of gifts. Around 70% were things we needed. Think new shoes, clothes, bed sheets sometimes, toothbrushes, etc. We were under 13 and I can assure you, those gifts made the quantity seem excessive. I remember trying to open the clothes and that stuff first to end with a bang & excitement with things I really wanted. But this is quite a haul.
Sparky Hughes 4 weeks ago
I want to add the using what we have mentality is still ingrained in me. I can afford things but am satisfied with what I have.
Load More Replies... Sally Moen 1 month ago
I used to envy girls in school who got similar girly stuff: makeup, stuff that fixes hair, jewelry, and little if any sport-related or educational toys. What I lacked in that I still have: bicycling and hiking and camping and outdoor skills and interests. Would be great to have a diamond necklace but I know how to setup a campsite and can roast a hotdog on a fire
Far_Rhubarb7177 1 month ago
Ugh…this reminds me of how my two nieces have been raised. They’re young women now, but for their entire lives, their parents have given them EVERYTHING, and then some! On top of that, their grandmother (my mom) has also spoiled them rotten, constantly giving them LOTS of $$$$. And they don’t even need that money, since their parents have always given them lots of cash, too. Each girl received a Rolex watch upon turning 15 And they don’t even wear the watches! When the younger one was about to turn 18, she dictated to everyone that since this would be her “last birthday during high school,” it had to be extra special, meaning that everyone was expected to pony up lots of expensive gifts or lots of money. Entitled much?! I mean, they’re my nieces and I love them, but they’re spoiled on a level that’s unprecedented for our family!
Annika Kremer 1 month ago
I was such a tomboy at 12 (still am, for the most part, let's not kid ourselves here), so it was sort of interesting what more feminine girls are into.
Lara Verne 1 month ago
It remind me of so-called Boo baskets (Halloween gift basket) trend. I saw how woman made one for her daughter. It contained a lot of overpriced Sephora skincare/makeup products, designer bag, Stanley cup with accessories, overpriced ugly Ugg shoes...etc. It cost over 1000 dollars. Her daughter was 6 years old....
Rachel Reynolds 1 month ago
Every year we ask the 3 boyz if they want a "big" Christmas or if they want a special experience and a small Christmas. They have chose the experience.
Tyke 1 month ago
The amount of presents is obscene. On top of this... she's posted this on thicktok? Surely her daughter's going to see it and will know all her gifts anyway. The whole thing is ridiculous and she's raising a spoilt brat.
KatSaidThat 1 month ago
I really hope they donate these to charity when she gets bored of them and moves on to the next big thing.
Antoinette the Red 1 month ago
You must, moggiemoo, since you took time to read it AND comment.
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Me neither. I had to Google a lot of it, honestly XD I recognized the Uggs because my mom went through a period of time where she was OBSESSED with them when she was in her 70s, for some odd reason, but that's about it. I can also tell you that, as a lifelong gamer, I would HATE something like that Woojer "gaming vest". It apparently vibrates along with whatever is happening in the video game you're playing. I play a *ton* of video games and I can't image how weird and distracting that would be XD
Load More Replies... You May Like “They Are So Ungrateful”: Mom Films Son’s Reaction To Angel Tree Gifts, Gets 2M Views And A Lot Of Opinions "Kids Will Be Kids": Mom's Gentle Parenting Sparks Christmas Drama As Aunt Is Done With Their Chaos People Shared The Weirdest Things Kids Asked For Christmas
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