Woman Says She Can’t Forgive Husband For Their Wedding Day, Even After 3 Months, Asks For Advice
Your wedding day is supposed to be one of the most beautiful moments of your life, filled with love, joy, and hope for the future.
But Reddit user Samisintrouble remembers hers with a heavy heart and tears in her eyes.
The woman made a post on the subreddit ‘Am I Wrong?‘ explaining that it’s been a few months after the ceremony but she still can’t forgive her husband for the way he behaved and remains torn between wanting to end the relationship and trying to make it work.
Getting cold feet before the wedding is totally normal
Image credits: Felipe Bustillo (not the actual photo)
But this woman continues to have doubts about her marriage even months after she tied the knot
Image credits: Annie Spratt (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Aneta Voborilova (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Wavebreakmedia (not the actual photo)
Image credits: samisintrouble
Familial tension is present at many weddings
“I’m afraid to say that as a wedding planner, handling challenging family dynamics has become part of my regular ‘job role,’ whether it be due to separated, divorced, or estranged family members,” Lisa Burton, the founder and head planner at The Bridal Consultant, told Bored Panda.
To minimize the chance of potential conflicts, Burton often consults with couples on ways to handle this beforehand.
“Common problems are the top table and who will sit on it (or not), finances—specifically, who pays for what if family members are contributing—and one you might not immediately think of, but is quite common with blended families, is a very large and complex guest list,” she explained. “The couple might have to decide who they can [and cannot] afford to invite.”
“One instance that comes to mind is a couple that needed an extra-long top table so they could include all their parents and their new partners,” Burton recalled. “Not necessarily an issue unless you have a venue too small to accommodate it. In the end, the couple opted for a sweetheart table to sit alone, as they simply couldn’t decide who to place where without upsetting someone.”
“Another time, we had a very small wedding with only 20 guests; the family just didn’t get on, so we ended up with 5 or 6 separate tables at the reception, as the bride was worried there would be an altercation or fight at the reception,” she added.
The groom from the Reddit post could have definitely handled things with more compassion towards his wife.
“To get married in the first place, you would hope one has a healthy partnership with mutual trust, good open communication, and of course, respect,” Burton said. “If you have these, then working out how to manage family expectations during the wedding, while not necessarily easy, should be achievable. I find issues only arise when one of the above is missing.”
Lisa, who has planned over 1,400 weddings abroad, suggests partners discuss ahead what each of them wants, approach the big day unified, and communicate with respect. “That way, you’ll probably find your families are more than happy to oblige.”
Hopefully, the author of the post will find the courage to confront the situation head on
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
But once you’re married, in-laws become a hard-to-avoid part of your life. Plus, as we can see from the Reddit story, chances are your spouse is quite fond of their family, meaning that you will have to find ways to get along with them.
According to Billie Tyler, who is a licensed marriage and family therapist, ignoring a problem until it goes away is not a good answer for any issue, including those with your in-laws.
“Turning the other cheek can seem like an easier choice for many. However, it’s kind of like kicking the can down the road. Eventually, someone would reach a big pile of cans that they have to climb over,” Tyler said.
“If you’re struggling with your in-laws, you may want to actually lean into the discomfort and try and put yourself in their shoes.”
The therapist believes that empathy really is your best option to create a path toward harmony. “Time must be spent to try and understand the perspective of each person involved. Curiosity and empathy must be the lead in all pursuits of peace. If everyone can feel understood, there is more room for flexibility and change to happen in these relationships,” she explained.
So it sounds like the author of the original post should confront the situation sooner rather than later. But considering everyone else’s apathetic stance, her fear and hesitation are certainly understandable.
People who read the woman’s story were very supportive of her
You're so right. People post on those subreddits asking for help and opinions. It must be horrible for someone like OP to find their post shown off on a completely different website like this. BP should refrain from such posts in general.
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Oh dear. This is heartbreaking. I hope OP can gather the strength to leave this spoiled man-child and find someone who treats her with the respect she deserves. Things are not going to get better and it would be a huge mistake to bring a child into such a toxic environment. Move on now, OP. Be prepared for MIL to turn nasty because nobody throws a tantrum like a narcissist who has lost control of someone else's mind. Get. Out. Now.
What an insane thing to do. Sounds like the mother exerts complete control over him and he will take all his hate out on the wife. She needs to leave. He needs major therapy
No amount of therapy will fix him. He's a mommas boy and always will be. She should've left the ring and an empty house for him to come home to. Correction, just an empty house. Annul the wedding and find a real man.
Load More Replies... You're so right. People post on those subreddits asking for help and opinions. It must be horrible for someone like OP to find their post shown off on a completely different website like this. BP should refrain from such posts in general.
Load More Replies... Oh dear. This is heartbreaking. I hope OP can gather the strength to leave this spoiled man-child and find someone who treats her with the respect she deserves. Things are not going to get better and it would be a huge mistake to bring a child into such a toxic environment. Move on now, OP. Be prepared for MIL to turn nasty because nobody throws a tantrum like a narcissist who has lost control of someone else's mind. Get. Out. Now.
What an insane thing to do. Sounds like the mother exerts complete control over him and he will take all his hate out on the wife. She needs to leave. He needs major therapy
No amount of therapy will fix him. He's a mommas boy and always will be. She should've left the ring and an empty house for him to come home to. Correction, just an empty house. Annul the wedding and find a real man.
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