Person “Destroys Their Family” After Buying An Ancestry Kit And Learning Their Dad Isn’t Their Biological Father
Imgur user Aharit has always been curious about their ancestors. So, to learn more about them, they recently bought a couple of those genetic testing kits everyone can find online. Aharit used one and they gave the other to their dad. But when the two of them got back the results, it was nothing like they expected.
According to the findings, Aharit and their dad do not share the same DNA, meaning they aren’t related biologically. Neither of them had the slightest clue, and the only person who could’ve known anything about this—Aharit’s mom—passed away from Alzheimer’s disease in 2017. Eventually, Aharit shared their story on Imgur, detailing the complex emotions they’ve been going through during this difficult time. People immediately started sending them their best wishes, reminding that the results don’t change the past the father and child had shared. After Bored Panda got in touch with Aharit, it’s clear that the family think the same way, refusing to let genetics mess up their bond.
Image credits: Aharit
Aharit said their mom and dad are great, and their personalities match really well. “Unfortunately, as I was still relatively young when my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease, I never got a true opportunity to get to know her super well. That doesn’t mean she wasn’t there for me or anything like that. She was always there for me,” they told Bored Panda. She actually left work when I was born to raise me full-time, leaving my dad to be the main breadwinner for our family. I’m an only child, and my mom raised me to the best of her ability.”
To this day, Aharit’s dad says that one of the biggest regrets he has had is not being able to spend as much time as he probably ‘should have’ with his kid. “He did work a lot, and he also traveled a bit for work, but when he was home, he gave me any attention that I required,” Aharit said. “He helped me with any school work that my mom couldn’t help with for whatever reason. He helped me with all of my science fair projects and he was also very involved with my education, as much as he could be while also working.”
In Aharit’s eyes, however, their dad did everything they could to help raise them. “He taught me how to ride a bike, and how to play sports, even though I’ve never been a sporty individual. When I was about 13, he ‘semi-retired’ from where he worked for many years and he started working at a more local business part-time. When my mom got sick, he did everything in his power to care for her. He bathed her, fed her and dressed her. He sang to her, and spoke to her even when she couldn’t respond back.”
“They both deeply cared for each other, I know that for a fact,” Aharit commented on their parents’ marriage. “When they got married, they promised each other to ‘never go to bed upset’ and to always try to work out any differences that would come up between them. I have no recollection of ever hearing them raise their voices at the other. There was never any form of abuse toward each other, let alone towards me. We lived a very good life, and I’d say they had a positively amazing marriage.
The test results immediately broke Aharit down into tears. “I didn’t know what to think,” they said. “Growing up, it had been thrown about as a joke that both of my parents were blue-eyed and I was brown-eyed, so I must be the milkman’s son! Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that to actually be the case. I had looked into it before and I knew it was rare – but possible – for 2 blue-eyed parents to have a brown-eyed child, so that’s just what I believed for my entire life up to that moment.
Aharit thought the conclusions were wrong, however, it was very unlikely. “I called my dad immediately. Still sobbing uncontrollably. He was deeply worried about what had me so upset. I’ve been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, and one of the symptoms of that is abandonment issues. My head was spinning with thoughts like ‘I’m going to lose my dad over this.’ I don’t have much in the way of friends. I have one amazing friend online but that’s basically it. My dad is my rock and I couldn’t imagine living without him in my life.”
They told him what the test said and he was adamant that it was wrong. “He had been in the room when I was born. He pointed out that his birthday was 9 months before my birthday and (awkwardly) pointed out that it’s not uncommon for couples to have sex on each other’s birthdays. I couldn’t drop the subject though, regardless of what he said. I pointed out all the ways the 23&me test showed we were completely different. And the fact that we didn’t share any ancestors in the past 4 generations really hurt me. Eventually, he calmed me down, he assured me that no matter what this test means, he’s still my father, and my mom is still my mom. It didn’t matter to him what some stupid test says. I went to visit him in person the next day and we talked it over some more and he’s still insistent that something isn’t right, but not to let it cloud my memories of my mom, and that he still sees himself as my dad no matter what. He’s been in my life for 30 years, after all, he can’t just stop now because of this.”