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“My Fiancée Isn’t Speaking To Me After I Used ‘Our’ Money To Help My Dog”
138points
6.9K
Animals, Dogs2 years ago

“My Fiancée Isn’t Speaking To Me After I Used ‘Our’ Money To Help My Dog”

Dogs are friendly, affectionate, but, most importantly, loyal. They’re willing to do everything for their humans. So, it’s only fair we do everything in our power to take care of them, right? Well, one woman doesn’t think so. When Reddit user Unsurebigbig spent $5,000 for his German Shepherd’s surgery, his fiancée went ballistic. You see, even though the money was his savings, it was also part of their wedding budget. The bride-to-be was furious that they’d have to downsize the ceremony for a 10-year-old dog, so she went into full ignore mode. Unable to figure out what to do, Unsurebigbig asked the internet for advice. (Facebook cover: GaiBru_Photo / istockphoto)

Image credits: Laura Nicola (not the actual photo)

According to a survey by the Associated Press and Petside.com, 14 percent of people would choose their pet over their significant other.

Unfortunately, the survey only asked, “who would you choose?” Another important question would have been “how in the world did it get to that point?”

It’s critical to understand where the problem is coming from. Is it your significant other who has a problem with your dog (or the way you treat your dog?) or is it the other way around? Whether the problem is on the human or canine side, Josh Weiss-Roessler from Ceasar’s Way offers a few things that you can try:

Have Play Dates. Give your spouse and your dog some time alone together. “You probably had them get to know your parents and friends in this way when you started to become more serious, right? Well, your dog may be even more important because they’re essentially a roommate that your spouse may have ‘married into.'”

Set Ground Rules. Just because you and your dog have a routine, that doesn’t mean that your spouse is comfortable with all of it. “Sit down and have a discussion about the rules, boundaries, and limitations, so you’re both on the same page. Expressing a desire to not sleep with your dog when they’re sleeping with you is a completely reasonable expectation, for example, and if you adopt a ‘take it or leave it’ approach, the relationship (the human one) just isn’t going to last.”

Compromise. Ah yes, the hallmark of every long-lasting human relationship. “You need to talk about issues as early as possible. Maybe your spouse hates having the dog on any of the furniture. That’s probably not going to fly if you let Fido anywhere and everywhere at all times, so that’s where compromise comes in — no more sleeping on the bed, but the dog can still cuddle on the couch, for example.”

Here’s what people said about the situation

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Carol Emory
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

How you fix it is cancel the wedding, ditch bridezilla, and take your dog on vacation. People saying that it should have been discussed..maybe. My husband and I rarely talk finances, but we do discuss big purchases. That being said, if we had a dog that needed emergency surgery, it would be known that we would do it and the other one might be upset...but we'd make it work. This bridezilla talking about how it's going to affect "her wedding" needs to stop acting like a two year old. The silent treatment..really? And you're thinking of marrying that?

Florencia Renedo
Community Member
2 years ago

Agree! Who wants to marry a cold heart horrible person like that?

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Louise B
Community Member
2 years ago

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt, and maybe she has her own reasons. Personally, if I had a man who loves his dog this much - he's a keeper! What would he do for his children? I agree with the person who mentioned the silent treatment. If the person who is supposed to love you most in the world won't even talk to you, you have bigger problems.

TigerDRena
Community Member
2 years ago

How can she have her own reasons if she values a wedding more than a living being? Especially if she's mad that her fiance used his own money and made his own decision?

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Nadine
Community Member
2 years ago

Honestly, I'm so sick of people that I tend to measure the value of a person based on how they treat animals ... Bridezilla over here can go eff off. They had separate accounts, the OP had saved up his own money, and he didn't need to discuss this expense with her because we're talking about a loyal and loving creature's life and well-being. My husband and I have separate accounts and a joint savings account. We have four cats (two are his and two are mine) and if anything ever happens to them, we don't care about the expenses. They are our furbabies. They are living, feeling, creatures. They give us all their love without asking for anything (other than treats and chin scritches) in exchange. As their caregivers, we must ensure they are properly treated if they're showing any signs of illness.

Aunt Messy
Community Member
2 years ago

If anything had happened to one of the cats and they had to go to the vet, there would be no discussion. Whichever one of us was there at the time would just do it, THEN call and tell the other what happened.

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Carol Emory
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

How you fix it is cancel the wedding, ditch bridezilla, and take your dog on vacation. People saying that it should have been discussed..maybe. My husband and I rarely talk finances, but we do discuss big purchases. That being said, if we had a dog that needed emergency surgery, it would be known that we would do it and the other one might be upset...but we'd make it work. This bridezilla talking about how it's going to affect "her wedding" needs to stop acting like a two year old. The silent treatment..really? And you're thinking of marrying that?

Florencia Renedo
Community Member
2 years ago

Agree! Who wants to marry a cold heart horrible person like that?

Load More Replies...
Louise B
Community Member
2 years ago

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt, and maybe she has her own reasons. Personally, if I had a man who loves his dog this much - he's a keeper! What would he do for his children? I agree with the person who mentioned the silent treatment. If the person who is supposed to love you most in the world won't even talk to you, you have bigger problems.

TigerDRena
Community Member
2 years ago

How can she have her own reasons if she values a wedding more than a living being? Especially if she's mad that her fiance used his own money and made his own decision?

Load More Replies...
Nadine
Community Member
2 years ago

Honestly, I'm so sick of people that I tend to measure the value of a person based on how they treat animals ... Bridezilla over here can go eff off. They had separate accounts, the OP had saved up his own money, and he didn't need to discuss this expense with her because we're talking about a loyal and loving creature's life and well-being. My husband and I have separate accounts and a joint savings account. We have four cats (two are his and two are mine) and if anything ever happens to them, we don't care about the expenses. They are our furbabies. They are living, feeling, creatures. They give us all their love without asking for anything (other than treats and chin scritches) in exchange. As their caregivers, we must ensure they are properly treated if they're showing any signs of illness.

Aunt Messy
Community Member
2 years ago

If anything had happened to one of the cats and they had to go to the vet, there would be no discussion. Whichever one of us was there at the time would just do it, THEN call and tell the other what happened.

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