30 Times Cosmopolitan Had The Worst Dating And Sex Advice, So Bad They Ended Up On This Group

Stardust she/her

Stardust she/her

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Legend has it that they’re roommates

My boyfriend is allergic. That's not the kind of swelling I'm looking for.

Saw the heating bill after the first one. Rewrote the article.

How many potatoes am I supposed to eat???

No, no, there no such things as double standards. People would know that.

Hideous

Damn don't touch me I feel harassed

Came up with a new meaning for "p**s me off"

Humans are the weirdest animals

Perhaps this has been one great, big, smelly misunderstanding. Maybe the readers said that they didn't like men who were full of $hit and 'Sarah' took that literally.

At least they have a question mark rather than an exclamation point at the end.

So, what article you doing for Christmas Meggie?

Like guys who scratch their private parts in public.

Written by someone with no moral compass. If you want to have an open relationship, find a partner that is ok with that.

i laughed so loud :D i imagined myself muttering HUUUUMUUUSS while doing the thing XD

Ace

Ace

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Surely this one's straight out of Viz!

My wife has been 29 since I met her 15 years ago,

Two hot guys who are also "roommates"? Congratulations, it's just a gay couple experimenting with their sêxlife

No they aren't

Oh wow. This didn't age well.

“Bubblelicious butts” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

That's it, I've had enough, I'm scrolling straight down to the rating

"Hummmmmmussssssss......"

Make your gym socks mittens in the winter. Save some money.

I don't think I would date seahorse, but whatever floats your boat..

BP censors "w***y wonka" but not this?

What a Bozo.

I could accept it as funny, but it's not even that. It's just b******t

Ewww

Square faces like SpongeBob soak up all of your attention

Well, that's just crumby.

I like how this whole thing was allowed on here but I can’t say a*s

Right, I just can imagine this with Game of Thrones or Harry Potter. Sure, both authors have other works, too (I was a fan of Martin's scifi when he hadn't write a word of GoT yet), but if you say that it'll be obvious you haven't read either (and was living under a rock for the last 20 years).

This is not the way.

Who's gonna tell him...

No, he’s probably wondering where the f**k that bee is 🐝

That idea is all wet.

Leave pets out of this insanity

How dare you have friends?

Actually I save any messages that r sweet or anything to make me feel better when I feel like s**t

"theres a lot to unpack here" no there isn't lmao

I think the person who answered this needs help.

What?? Don’t offer to pay if you don’t mean it 🤷🏻‍♀️

If they'll do it with you, they'll do it to you.

What year was this article from?

If you have pizza in bed alone is masturbation then?

Life advice: PLEASE NEVER DO THIS

Yeah this one sucks. A close family member of mine almost died from anorexia, she was in hospital for 11 weeks, and took years to fully recover.

No, Taylor. Stalking is bad. Say it with me: “Stalking is BAD!”

I prefer velociraptor. But OK.

This was probably written by a man. "Vagina tingling" sounds like a yeast infection, not like a ladyboner.

In other words: Ashley is a lying ho 🤫

Anyone else halfway expect before-and-after pictures of her signature?

I so wonder what year it was. Imagine doing this every time a man writes to you on e.g. Slack

But was it "you're" or "your boyfriend"? Inquiring minds want to know! Missing a word is lesser crime than confusing your and you're.

I wonder how many animals might need vision correction? 🦨🐁🦫🦃🐕‍🦺🐏🐖🐄🦜🦥

Kris Kross will make ya....

well, at least they didn't kidnap them. these are some decent people :)

HeavyMetalHeart

HeavyMetalHeart

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Oh. No thank you.

heh?

Did she name her child Grogu?

Erm... So she's supposed to do the maths, memorize all those signals and use them correctly when 90% to orgasm? Is this an exam or fun couple times?

Ok, am I the only one to think the most cringy thing in these are doll illustrations? I don't know why, maybe they're just too uncanny valley for me, but couldn't Cosmo of all things afford something better?

And that’s the last time she signed on to do stock photo shoots.

let’s just draw the line at stalking anyone regardless of age

This is just trans rights but with some gross undertones about men :/

Ah yes, the patent pending m'lady approach