“What Year Is This?”: Woman Slams Hotel For “Confusing And Outdated” Dress Code Enforcement

A woman has called out a Sydney hotel after a security guard told her to “cover up” if she wanted to have a few drinks with her friends at the bar.

Joey Hespe said the incident reflects the “double standards” in Australian society regarding the objectification of men and women based on their clothing.

The 39-year-old mother had been at a black-tie event before she decided to stop for a drink at the Pyrmont Bridge Hotel.

“The security guard checked my ID, then looked me up and down and said, ‘You can go in, but you can’t take your jacket off’,” Joey told news.com.au.

Woman holding wine glass at pub highlighting double standards in dress code and covering up policies.

A Sydney woman, Joey Hespe, criticized a hotel after a security guard told her to “cover up”

Image credits: joey_writes_

“I asked him to repeat himself and he said my dress was ‘see-through’ and ‘against dress code.’”

The long, ruffled gown featured a V-neck and sheer, polka-dot fabric on the legs.

Joey said she “froze” when the security guard looked her up and down.  

Woman in striped dress sitting on a chair holding a book, highlighting woman told to cover up and double standards.

Image credits: joey_writes_

“My body was being scrutinized and s*xualized, while at the same time I was told to cover it up. 

“It left me humiliated, confused, and angry – a mix of objectification and control that women know all too well.”

The mother said she was in a state of “shock” following the incident and that she noticed a man wearing a tank top inside the premises.

She had been attending a black-tie event and stopped at the hotel wearing a long, ruffled gown

People outside Pyrmont Bridge Hotel pub at dusk highlighting woman told to cover up and double standards discussion.

Image credits: WOODS BAGOT

“It struck me how blatant the double standard was: women are told to cover up, while men are free to wear whatever they want,” Joey continued. 

“Aside from the fact that my dress was not see-through, there were just a few sheer panels on the legs, that feeling of being simultaneously objectified and suppressed in the same moment was horrible.”

The woman concluded that the security man’s request carried a subliminal message: that she needed to cover up so that men at the hotel bar could “control themselves.”

Woman in layered black dress taking a mirror selfie highlighting issues of woman told to cover up at pub and double standards.

Image credits: joey_writes_

Andrew McDonald, General Manager at the Pyrmont Bridge Hotel, told news.com.au that the security guard’s decision “is not supported by management or hotel policy.”

“On entry the patron was asked by a guard to keep her jacket on, to cover the transparent strips in her dress,” the manager said.

The 39-year-old said the incident highlighted double standards regarding how men and women are objectified based on clothing

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Sherele Moody (@sherelemoodyfemicidewatch)

Comment on social media addressing respect and calling for pub security to reconsider standards after woman told to cover up.

Woman at pub reacts to being told to cover up, highlighting gender double standards in public dress code debates.

“The patron was not denied entry to the Hotel. She entered the venue and had drinks with her group.

“The decision by the security officer to request that the patron keep her jacket on was made independently.

“We have a relaxed approach to dress code and welcome everyone from tradies to brides and grooms on a weekly basis. His direction is not supported by management or hotel policy.”

Cozy pub interior at night with bar stools and ambient lighting, reflecting social double standards in woman cover up discussions.

Image credits: Pyrmont Bridge Hotel

The manager stated that the incident was “unexpected and out of character for our contracted security team and does not represent the values of the Hotel or our commitment to inclusiveness, equality, and respect for personal expression.”

The hotel clarified that “at no point did the security officer” make “derogatory remarks” about Joey’s outfit. 

Still, McDonald noted that management will ensure the hotel’s standards are “consistently upheld” following the incident.

Joey said the guard’s request implied women must cover up so men could “control themselves”

Bartender pouring cocktails at a pub bar with people socializing, highlighting woman told to cover up double standards.

Image credits: Stanislav Ivanitskiy/Unsplash

Meanwhile, Joey believes what happened to her isn’t an isolated case.

“This is bigger than me – it’s about how women are still told in 2025, that it’s our responsibility to control how men react to us,” she said. “That message is toxic and outdated.”

According to Stand Up International, a program designed to help prevent street harassment, 78% of Australian women have experienced s*xual harassment in public spaces.

Woman wearing a black dress at home exposing double standards after being told to cover up at pub looking confident.

Image credits: joey_writes_

The most common type of harassment is inappropriate and unwanted s*xual looks, gestures, staring or leering that makes women feel uncomfortable.

It’s followed by suggestive or intrusive comments or jokes about their appearance, clothing, anatomy, or looks, and somebody repeatedly whistling at them or catcalling.

Woman taking mirror selfie dressed in black, highlighting double standards about being told to cover up at pub.

Image credits: joey_writes_

Sherele Moody, a media advocate for families impacted by femicide in Australia, condemned the security guard’s treatment of Joey in a social media post.

“Excuse me, @pyrmontbridgehotel, but what part of @joey_writes_ dress is inappropriate? No really. What part?” she wrote. “Is it too long, too black, too froo-froo – or is that (shock-horror) a little bit of skin can be seen?”

The expert added: “Women deserve to enjoy their nights out – or in – without being sl*t-shamed. What we wear is no one else’s business. 

“Surely, in 2025, we have got past policing what women wear.”

People supported Joey after she spoke up against the security guard’s “disgusting behavior”

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Comment from user mandymaree73 expressing doubt about a woman being told to cover up, highlighting double standards at a pub.

Comment on a social media post condemning hotel security for telling a woman to cover up, highlighting double standards.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing women's bodies policing and double standards at a pub.

Comment on social media post about woman told to cover up at pub, highlighting double standards and dress code criticism.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing double standards women face about what to wear at a pub.

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Alt text: Instagram comment discussing double standards faced by woman told to cover up at pub and reflecting on 80s fashion trends.

Comment on social media supporting a woman told to cover up at a pub, highlighting double standards and dress choice.

Screenshot of Instagram comment by woman addressing double standards after being told to cover up at pub.

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