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Aunt Tells 9-Year-Old She Deserves To Be Scratched For The Way She Treated Her Pet
Aunt Tells 9-Year-Old She Deserves To Be Scratched For The Way She Treated Her Pet
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Aunt Tells 9-Year-Old She Deserves To Be Scratched For The Way She Treated Her Pet

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Pets are not toys, and owners know it. However, someone who’s never had one before might need a reminder that the critters are living things with limits to their patience as well.

Redditor u/shenanigansarefun told the AITA community about the time her cat’s patience ran out. Her nine-year-old niece repeatedly bothered the critter and handled it inappropriately, until it scratched her. The incident left the girl crying and the OP being called a jerk, even though she told the child to be gentle with the cat. Scroll down to find the full story.

Bored Panda has reached out to the OP and she was kind enough to answer a few of our questions. In order to better understand cat behavior and how stress affects them, we also turned to cat behavior consultant, writer, and educator Alice Chau-Ginguene. You will find their thoughts in the text below.

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    Cats are living creatures that might use their claws if you handle them inappropriately

    Image credits: bondarillia (not the actual photo)

    This woman told her niece to be gentle with her cat but the child did not listen

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    Image credits: Media_photos (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: shenanigansarefun

    Knowing how to read a cat’s body language can help the owner understand what the critter is feeling

    Image credits: Susanna Marsiglia (not the actual photo)

    “A lot of people don’t treat animals as family. We do,” the OP told Bored Panda. “I’ve been a lifelong cat owner and even had a cat live till the age of 22.” She emphasized that when it comes to felines, it’s important to respect the animal and recognize that body language and vocalizations have meaning.

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    Pets WebMD pointed out that cats are very expressive with their body language, when you know how to read it. For example, when they’re happy and relaxed, their ears stay in a natural posture and the tail is laid flat. If the critters are lying showing their belly, that means they feel safe. When felines are scared or worried, they might flick their ears and arch their back. They also tend to raise their tail (or curl it around their body) and might have bristled fur and dilated pupils.

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    The redditor said that there have been no further problems with the girl and the cat. “My niece has learned that animals are like humans and feel emotions such as anger and pain,” she pointed out.

    “She no longer picks the cat up when she feels like and lets him come to her. He picks who he snuggles with in the house and we no longer have any unfortunate cat scratches. My biggest worry was her safety and also that the cat would sustain an injury squirming out of her arms. I know cats are quite agile and quick on their feet, but I always worry that an animal will be harmed even accidentally if he landed wrong squirming.”

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    Cat behaviorist Alice Chau-Ginguene told Bored Panda that picking up the pet against its will and handling it roughly usually evokes a flight or fight response. “Due to the caused anxiety, the cat will either run away to hide or will fight back. That could be a dangerous situation for both the cat and the child as the feline might scratch or even bite in order to get themselves out of that situation.

    “Moreover, it can lead to chronic anxiety, which in the long run causes not only mental but physical issues as well, such as anxiety-induced infection. Similar situations can also break the cat-human bond,” she added.

    The expert also emphasized that it’s important for a territorial animal like a cat to have their space. “Every cat should have what we call a ‘core area’ in a home—this is where they know they can eat, sleep and play without disturbance from others. If you live in a smaller space, even creating a corner, which your cat knows is theirs, can be very helpful.”

    A pet is a lifelong commitment, which is why the OP was disgusted some people would simply get rid of theirs

    Image credits: Quỳnh Anh Nguyễn (not the actual photo)

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    The OP told Bored Panda that the cat in the story is alive and well. She also shared how another critter became part of their family after being abandoned. “I once found a shivering wet cat at my former job hiding by the dumpster. He tried going into the building. He was very sweet, loving, and friendly. I called my mom and I had her scoop him up and I took him to the vet after work. He had no chip. I also reached out to online forums and no one claimed him. He was matted, not neutered, had sores in his mouth and an upper respiratory infection. The vet put him on antibiotics.”

    “I decided to keep him. We had him quarantined safe and warm in the bathroom away from other animals for the recommended period and tested for diseases. I also got his vaccinations. Turns out, he had feline aids,” she added.

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    “I kept him for the rest of his life and he was a wonderful addition to our family. The vet said he was probably a house cat that got abandoned due to his having feline aids. He was soaked, starving because of his mouth ulcers. If he wasn’t rescued, the vet said he would probably have died within days. I brushed out his mats and with proper antibiotics and food, he put on two pounds in two weeks.”

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    “It makes me disgusted and angry that people can just dump animals especially when a pet is a lifetime commitment. They could have found the cat a new home with someone who could deal with his medical issues instead of dumping him off for dead,” the OP said.

    Forbes pointed out that 66% of households in the US—totaling to nearly 87 million of them—own a pet, 46.5 million of which have a cat. Preceded only by a dog, it’s the second most popular pet in the country.

    The redditors thought the OP wasn’t a jerk in the situation

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    People shared similar stories in the comments

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    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, Community member

    Read more »

    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    Read less »
    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, Community member

    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    What do you think ?
    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    9 is plenty old enough to learn to treat animals gently.

    Captain Kyra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At 9 I'd be concerned that she is showing so little respect for boundaries. Her mother needs to be less concerned about Aunt being an a***hole and more concerned about her daughter being one. Toddlers are taught to treat animals with respect. Mom may need to take a serious look at how her daughter treats others, and how she treats her daughter. Kids can feel like pawns in life, maybe she wants to Queen over something. Give her a little autonomy and she if she shows more respect for the autonomy of others.

    Load More Replies...
    LK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'Deserve' is the wrong word. But it is very much 'natural consequences'. This is an excellent time to talk about boundaries, and learning some compassion.

    Jennifer Clayton
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have this problem as a dog owner in an apartment complex. Some people think my dog is a Disneyland ride and send their kids/toddlers to poke at him while he's dumping lunch. When I warn them he's not good with kids, he's really old, they get mad. I walk with a cane and also a leash, I don't have time to protect tiny fingers.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They’ve been warned plenty of times. If they send their kid over to bother the dog, one day someone is going to get bit. Not your dog’s fault, not your fault. They’ll try to make it your fault. It’s not and don’t let them try that. Plenty of warning.

    Load More Replies...
    Fat Harry
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We've got a 20 year old who we have to keep telling to leave the dog alone when she's sleeping. He just can't help himself from bothering the dog, putting his face right next to hers, and generally annoying her when all she's doing is keeping to herself. He's not got developmental difficulties, he's just an idiot.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Putting his face right next to hers and annoying her is basically begging her to bite him in the face.

    Load More Replies...
    Son of Philosoraptor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My kid was about... 6? Playing with a cat named Corey Suddenly he's crying, flayed from elbow to wrist down his arm. Ok, scratched, but it's a pretty good one and Corey was a good girl. He had blown his breath hard in her face... Just like we told him not to do to the dog. Kid's all crying and blubbering but actually stammered out "it's my own fault" or words to that effect. Gave the kid a lot of credit for that.

    Abbelius
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it means anything, I had to learn from my mistakes with my first cat, as well. I was the one raising her since I was in what, fourth grade I think? Took a lot of trial and error to figure out when she was playing, and when she meant business.

    Load More Replies...
    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a little kid I was always deliberately provoking the family cat despite being repeatedly told to knock it off. Finally the cat had had enough and slashed me in the face badly enough that I started bleeding. I ran crying to my mum, who took one look and said "serves you right". Which it did.

    Sandy D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The little brat got what she deserved. She was told repeatedly what to do and what not to do. She decided she didn't need to cookie the rules, and apparently thinks the cat is there for her to abuse.. She is lucky it didn't bite her. He mouthy sounds like an idjitt and the cause of the 9 y/o's behavior issues, selfish behavior, and rudeness. She esky cos hurt the cat. I would trek her that if she so much as touched one hair on the cat, she would be shoeing an hour writing about what she did wrong, why it's wrong etc. If she half-asses it, she s does all over. Only allow contact between kid and cat when directly supervised by you

    Kimberly Buchanan Fisanick
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did that when my kids were in grade school. I always taught them how to interact with animals. And don't touch someone's animal without permission. Always ask. They have taught my 5 year old grandson too.

    Load More Replies...
    Loverboy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If someone is mistreating my pet this badly, they are leaving. I don't care if it's a child. They were told repeatedly what to do and what not to do and it kept happening. Poor cat.

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like OP lives with her sister and her sister's kids in order to help her sister with childcare. She can't really tell her niece to leave XD However, I agree with your sentiment - I don't tolerate anyone being rough with my pets. My puppy is disabled, but adorable, so little kids want to pet him/know what's wrong with him (he has myoclonus.) I have to tell them to be careful, especially with his ears. 99% of children will listen and will pet him gently. OP's niece, at 9, is old enough to learn. She is treating the cat like this deliberately because she WANTS to.

    Load More Replies...
    Tyke
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We had cats when I grew up. I learnt very quickly not to bother our elderly cat when I was around 4 because she scratched me - my Mum said "I've told you before she doesn't like that, I've told you before what signs to look for. The cat can't speak so you push it, you'll get scratched". I paid way more attention the cat's "signs" after that. All I can say is if this happens again because the niece's behaviour doesn't change then yes, she deserves it then.

    Marilyn Russell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is true - they give clear signs when they aren’t happy and warnings before they lash out.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    9 is plenty old enough to learn to treat animals gently.

    Captain Kyra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At 9 I'd be concerned that she is showing so little respect for boundaries. Her mother needs to be less concerned about Aunt being an a***hole and more concerned about her daughter being one. Toddlers are taught to treat animals with respect. Mom may need to take a serious look at how her daughter treats others, and how she treats her daughter. Kids can feel like pawns in life, maybe she wants to Queen over something. Give her a little autonomy and she if she shows more respect for the autonomy of others.

    Load More Replies...
    LK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'Deserve' is the wrong word. But it is very much 'natural consequences'. This is an excellent time to talk about boundaries, and learning some compassion.

    Jennifer Clayton
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have this problem as a dog owner in an apartment complex. Some people think my dog is a Disneyland ride and send their kids/toddlers to poke at him while he's dumping lunch. When I warn them he's not good with kids, he's really old, they get mad. I walk with a cane and also a leash, I don't have time to protect tiny fingers.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They’ve been warned plenty of times. If they send their kid over to bother the dog, one day someone is going to get bit. Not your dog’s fault, not your fault. They’ll try to make it your fault. It’s not and don’t let them try that. Plenty of warning.

    Load More Replies...
    Fat Harry
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We've got a 20 year old who we have to keep telling to leave the dog alone when she's sleeping. He just can't help himself from bothering the dog, putting his face right next to hers, and generally annoying her when all she's doing is keeping to herself. He's not got developmental difficulties, he's just an idiot.

    Miss Frankfurter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Putting his face right next to hers and annoying her is basically begging her to bite him in the face.

    Load More Replies...
    Son of Philosoraptor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My kid was about... 6? Playing with a cat named Corey Suddenly he's crying, flayed from elbow to wrist down his arm. Ok, scratched, but it's a pretty good one and Corey was a good girl. He had blown his breath hard in her face... Just like we told him not to do to the dog. Kid's all crying and blubbering but actually stammered out "it's my own fault" or words to that effect. Gave the kid a lot of credit for that.

    Abbelius
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it means anything, I had to learn from my mistakes with my first cat, as well. I was the one raising her since I was in what, fourth grade I think? Took a lot of trial and error to figure out when she was playing, and when she meant business.

    Load More Replies...
    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a little kid I was always deliberately provoking the family cat despite being repeatedly told to knock it off. Finally the cat had had enough and slashed me in the face badly enough that I started bleeding. I ran crying to my mum, who took one look and said "serves you right". Which it did.

    Sandy D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The little brat got what she deserved. She was told repeatedly what to do and what not to do. She decided she didn't need to cookie the rules, and apparently thinks the cat is there for her to abuse.. She is lucky it didn't bite her. He mouthy sounds like an idjitt and the cause of the 9 y/o's behavior issues, selfish behavior, and rudeness. She esky cos hurt the cat. I would trek her that if she so much as touched one hair on the cat, she would be shoeing an hour writing about what she did wrong, why it's wrong etc. If she half-asses it, she s does all over. Only allow contact between kid and cat when directly supervised by you

    Kimberly Buchanan Fisanick
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did that when my kids were in grade school. I always taught them how to interact with animals. And don't touch someone's animal without permission. Always ask. They have taught my 5 year old grandson too.

    Load More Replies...
    Loverboy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If someone is mistreating my pet this badly, they are leaving. I don't care if it's a child. They were told repeatedly what to do and what not to do and it kept happening. Poor cat.

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like OP lives with her sister and her sister's kids in order to help her sister with childcare. She can't really tell her niece to leave XD However, I agree with your sentiment - I don't tolerate anyone being rough with my pets. My puppy is disabled, but adorable, so little kids want to pet him/know what's wrong with him (he has myoclonus.) I have to tell them to be careful, especially with his ears. 99% of children will listen and will pet him gently. OP's niece, at 9, is old enough to learn. She is treating the cat like this deliberately because she WANTS to.

    Load More Replies...
    Tyke
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We had cats when I grew up. I learnt very quickly not to bother our elderly cat when I was around 4 because she scratched me - my Mum said "I've told you before she doesn't like that, I've told you before what signs to look for. The cat can't speak so you push it, you'll get scratched". I paid way more attention the cat's "signs" after that. All I can say is if this happens again because the niece's behaviour doesn't change then yes, she deserves it then.

    Marilyn Russell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is true - they give clear signs when they aren’t happy and warnings before they lash out.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
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