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Woman Finds Out Husband Is Cheating, Is Left Absolutely Shocked After Finding Out With Who
Close-up of a woman with a shocked expression, reflecting confusion about affair partner's baby being child or grandchild.

Woman Finds Out Husband Is Cheating, Is Left Absolutely Shocked After Finding Out With Who

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In a perfect world, we would all be able to put our lives on pause during the holiday season. You wouldn’t have to work or worry about issues in your personal life. No one would become ill, and unexpected issues would hold off until after New Year’s Day. 

But unfortunately, life doesn’t care if it’s about to be Christmas or your birthday or your anniversary. One woman’s life was recently turned upside down when her husband admitted that he had been having an affair. And to make matters worse, he revealed that he may have gotten their son’s ex-girlfriend pregnant. Below, you’ll find all the details that the mother shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left. 

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    This woman’s husband revealed that he had been having an affair for months

    Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Now, she’s wondering what the best move is for her family and marriage

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    Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Anna Tarazevich / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: SHVETS production / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits:  One-Dragonfly-5474

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    Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    About 20% of men will cheat on their spouse at some point

    Nobody ever expects their marriage to end in infidelity. When you tie the knot and say your vows, you commit to spending the rest of your life with the person you love. Unless, that is, they decide to throw it all away for someone else. Unfortunately, cheating is one of the most common reasons why marriages fall apart.

    And according to psychologist Briony Leo, “Research tells us that, on average, around 20 percent of men are unfaithful to their spouse, as compared to 13 percent of women.” However, she notes that these numbers only include self-reports, so it’s possible that even more people are cheating and just keeping it to themselves.

    Research from the Institute for Family Studies also found that men become even more likely to cheat in their fifties, sixties, and seventies. However, not every marriage is incapable of surviving infidelity. In fact, 53% of relationships where at least one spouse has cheated are still intact.

    That doesn’t mean that it’s easy to work through those issues. And of course, things can become much more complicated when there’s a baby involved. But it’s not unheard of for affairs to lead to new life. 

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    One study published in Current Biology estimates that, over the past 500 years, about 1% of the European population was born as a result of an extramarital affair. Meanwhile, in Australia, research has found that about 10% of children may have been conceived during an affair. 

    Once a person has learned that their spouse got another woman pregnant, it can be extremely difficult to give the marriage another try. Richard Nicastro, PhD, notes on his site that infidelity trauma can lead to a wide range of emotions, including rage, disbelief, confusion, insecurity, anxiety, and deep sadness.

    Image credits: Polina Zimmerman / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    It’s natural to feel disgust for your partner after finding out that they’ve cheated

    Navigating all of these feelings while trying to make decisions about the future of your marriage can be overwhelming. And as the author of this story noted, it’s common for those who have been cheated on to feel disgust towards their partner. 

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    “This kind of disgust doesn’t just make us turn away—it upends our sense of reality, forcing us to question the truths we once took for granted,” Dr. Nicastro explains. “This is the cruel nature of betrayal. It doesn’t just break your heart—it can prompt the same survival instinct that disgust was designed for, turning someone you once longed for into someone you can’t stand to be near.”

    It’s natural for the mother in this story to want to keep things cordial and as “normal” as possible for her children, at least until the holidays are over. But as many commenters pointed out, she owes her son the truth.

    PsychCentral warns that keeping secrets from kids can cause suspicion and resentment. It might also create a false sense of reality, which will be shattered when the truth inevitably comes out. 

    Just because it’s not easy to be honest with your children doesn’t mean that it’s not worth it. Especially when they’re old enough to notice changes in their parents’ behavior, kids will start creating their own stories if they’re not given the full picture.

    We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. How would you react if you were in this mother’s shoes? Then, if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article discussing similar family drama, look no further than right here

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    Later, the author responded to several commenters and provided some more context

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    Readers shared sympathy for the mother, and many encouraged her to be honest with her son and file for divorce

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    Poll Question

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    Thanks! Check out the results:

    Total votes ·
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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Read less »
    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    Read less »

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    What do you think ?
    Paul C.
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At the beginning, you say, I don't know how to fix this. Personally my answer would probably involve a Baseball bat, but that is just me. The man is scum.

    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm right there with you Paul.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So uh... apparently Emily seemingly wants to keep this child, even though it could be EITHER her ex-boyfriend's OR his more-than-twice-her-age father's offspring? I didn't see anything overt in OP's post about the child, but since pregnancy was mentioned and the child's paternity was called into question, it seems like Emily wants to keep this child. At 19 it's her decision, but good lord, I'm just trying to think about being a teenager and WANTING to keep a child if there's even a chance that its father was my teenaged ex-boyfriend's 46-year-old FATHER... uck :/ Does Emily envision some kind of fantasy romantic life with OP's husband? EDIT: I just re-read the post and realized the timing: OP says her husband admitted the affair "started" 6 months ago, and he and Emily were intimate 4 months ago, but Emily ONLY broke up with OP's son 2 MONTHS AGO. So OP's husband AND Emily were BOTH cheating... husband on OP and Emily on OP's son. EXTRA gross on BOTH of their parts.

    Kathrin Pukowsky
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What boggles my mind is that OP's husband being the father is the *better* option. Kick husband out, tell the son the truth, and try to bring the remaining family back on its feet without having to deal with ex-husband, his affair partner, and their offspring. They might push for visitation with the other children, but it sounds like those are teenagers, so they can make their own decision. But if James is the father? Barely an adult, bound to a cheating ex through a baby that might as well have been his own father's?! Ooof!

    Load More Replies...
    Apatheist
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So hard to read without commas.

    R Dennis
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'll likely get downvoted, but the lack of punctuation made it impossible for me to read. I tried, but started getting a headache.

    Load More Replies...
    Rick Murray
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What no poll? I wanted to see how many delusional pandas felt the husband deserves another chance after *that*...

    WHEEKS N THUMPS
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is it on her to "fix". I would be telling him he needs to tell James and his other kids and deal with the fallout. She is there for her kids but he is kicked out. And he can figure out himself what his next steps are. It's not on her to hold the family together- he fked that up himself. What a complete disgusting cretin. 19!! That's barely legal let alone old enough to make good decisions. Ok she was flirty and is responsible in this too. But he's a grown a*s adult with a wife and it's his kids girlfriend .. absolutely disgraceful. No way I'd be anywhere near him if that was me.

    Kathrin Pukowsky
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! That was my first thought when I read that OP doesn't "know how to fix this". She's one of the victims in this, and it's on the perpetrator to "fix" things. Not that there's much that can be done, daddy dearest not only nuked his marriage but also the relationship to his children.

    Load More Replies...
    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just when you think you've heard it all... I feel sorry for OP, James + the other kids. Anybody else think chickie baby-trapped the old guy? Has a job + steady income, etc.

    LollyLaLu
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tell your son now before he hears it from someone else & he will if you don't. As for your husband, well, pigs don't belong in the house. Kicked out, change the locks. Communicate through attorneys. I'm truly sorry but this is beyond betrayal. 😞

    Chris the Bobcat
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She shouldn't worry what relationship James has with his father. That ball is completely within James' court. As is that of the other children as well. I would just hope the child isn't her son's. Nothing good will come of this.

    Eri J
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people think cheating is accidental. *eyeroll*

    Kari Lynn
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The OP definitely needs to get the husband out of the house immediately, despite it being Christmas. James will have a harder time dealing with it if he realizes that OP knew and let him go through a celebration with his cheater dad. What if her bone headed husband invites Emily? What a disaster.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely drain the joint accounts before hiring an attorney. And don't let that pos sleep in the same bed. Like w*f

    JB
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That would not go down well in court. At most, OP could take 50% and freeze the accounts so her STBX has to shift his income to a new account of his own.

    Load More Replies...
    LongFang
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So 43 sleeps with a Teen AND no protection... Sad we used to have the Guillotine here.....

    tee-lena
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get that he's scum but the guillotine? Really?

    Load More Replies...
    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited)

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    People saying SHE should leave him.... W*F? Why should she be the one to have to leave? They have school age kids, who'll will be staying with her - not with the cheating bar steward. & even if no young kids, HE's the D**khead, so he should be hoofed out. Edit: Thanks for the downvotes. Wow. Peeps are reacting like I've stolen their firstborn! How dare I have an opinion.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's just a figure of speech, doesn't imply anything about who moves out from where, or any future living arrangements.

    Load More Replies...
    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Attention seeking fanfic

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

    UnclePanda
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

    Paul C.
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At the beginning, you say, I don't know how to fix this. Personally my answer would probably involve a Baseball bat, but that is just me. The man is scum.

    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm right there with you Paul.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So uh... apparently Emily seemingly wants to keep this child, even though it could be EITHER her ex-boyfriend's OR his more-than-twice-her-age father's offspring? I didn't see anything overt in OP's post about the child, but since pregnancy was mentioned and the child's paternity was called into question, it seems like Emily wants to keep this child. At 19 it's her decision, but good lord, I'm just trying to think about being a teenager and WANTING to keep a child if there's even a chance that its father was my teenaged ex-boyfriend's 46-year-old FATHER... uck :/ Does Emily envision some kind of fantasy romantic life with OP's husband? EDIT: I just re-read the post and realized the timing: OP says her husband admitted the affair "started" 6 months ago, and he and Emily were intimate 4 months ago, but Emily ONLY broke up with OP's son 2 MONTHS AGO. So OP's husband AND Emily were BOTH cheating... husband on OP and Emily on OP's son. EXTRA gross on BOTH of their parts.

    Kathrin Pukowsky
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What boggles my mind is that OP's husband being the father is the *better* option. Kick husband out, tell the son the truth, and try to bring the remaining family back on its feet without having to deal with ex-husband, his affair partner, and their offspring. They might push for visitation with the other children, but it sounds like those are teenagers, so they can make their own decision. But if James is the father? Barely an adult, bound to a cheating ex through a baby that might as well have been his own father's?! Ooof!

    Load More Replies...
    Apatheist
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So hard to read without commas.

    R Dennis
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'll likely get downvoted, but the lack of punctuation made it impossible for me to read. I tried, but started getting a headache.

    Load More Replies...
    Rick Murray
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What no poll? I wanted to see how many delusional pandas felt the husband deserves another chance after *that*...

    WHEEKS N THUMPS
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is it on her to "fix". I would be telling him he needs to tell James and his other kids and deal with the fallout. She is there for her kids but he is kicked out. And he can figure out himself what his next steps are. It's not on her to hold the family together- he fked that up himself. What a complete disgusting cretin. 19!! That's barely legal let alone old enough to make good decisions. Ok she was flirty and is responsible in this too. But he's a grown a*s adult with a wife and it's his kids girlfriend .. absolutely disgraceful. No way I'd be anywhere near him if that was me.

    Kathrin Pukowsky
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! That was my first thought when I read that OP doesn't "know how to fix this". She's one of the victims in this, and it's on the perpetrator to "fix" things. Not that there's much that can be done, daddy dearest not only nuked his marriage but also the relationship to his children.

    Load More Replies...
    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just when you think you've heard it all... I feel sorry for OP, James + the other kids. Anybody else think chickie baby-trapped the old guy? Has a job + steady income, etc.

    LollyLaLu
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tell your son now before he hears it from someone else & he will if you don't. As for your husband, well, pigs don't belong in the house. Kicked out, change the locks. Communicate through attorneys. I'm truly sorry but this is beyond betrayal. 😞

    Chris the Bobcat
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She shouldn't worry what relationship James has with his father. That ball is completely within James' court. As is that of the other children as well. I would just hope the child isn't her son's. Nothing good will come of this.

    Eri J
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people think cheating is accidental. *eyeroll*

    Kari Lynn
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The OP definitely needs to get the husband out of the house immediately, despite it being Christmas. James will have a harder time dealing with it if he realizes that OP knew and let him go through a celebration with his cheater dad. What if her bone headed husband invites Emily? What a disaster.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely drain the joint accounts before hiring an attorney. And don't let that pos sleep in the same bed. Like w*f

    JB
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That would not go down well in court. At most, OP could take 50% and freeze the accounts so her STBX has to shift his income to a new account of his own.

    Load More Replies...
    LongFang
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So 43 sleeps with a Teen AND no protection... Sad we used to have the Guillotine here.....

    tee-lena
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get that he's scum but the guillotine? Really?

    Load More Replies...
    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited)

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    People saying SHE should leave him.... W*F? Why should she be the one to have to leave? They have school age kids, who'll will be staying with her - not with the cheating bar steward. & even if no young kids, HE's the D**khead, so he should be hoofed out. Edit: Thanks for the downvotes. Wow. Peeps are reacting like I've stolen their firstborn! How dare I have an opinion.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's just a figure of speech, doesn't imply anything about who moves out from where, or any future living arrangements.

    Load More Replies...
    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Attention seeking fanfic

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

    UnclePanda
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

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