43YO Man Starts An Affair With 19YO Son’s GF, Has To Come Clean When She Gets Pregnant

In a perfect world, we would all be able to put our lives on pause during the holiday season. You wouldn’t have to work or worry about issues in your personal life. No one would become ill, and unexpected issues would hold off until after New Year’s Day. 

But unfortunately, life doesn’t care if it’s about to be Christmas or your birthday or your anniversary. One woman’s life was recently turned upside down when her husband admitted that he had been having an affair. And to make matters worse, he revealed that he may have gotten their son’s ex-girlfriend pregnant. Below, you’ll find all the details that the mother shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left. 

This woman’s husband revealed that he had been having an affair for months

Man in beige trench coat and glasses sitting on couch, looking distressed and unsure about affair partner's baby situation.

Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Now, she’s wondering what the best move is for her family and marriage

Man unsure if affair partner's baby is his child or grandchild as she’s his son’s recent ex in a text post.

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Man unsure if affair partner’s baby is his child or grandchild struggles with family and relationship doubts.

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About 20% of men will cheat on their spouse at some point

Nobody ever expects their marriage to end in infidelity. When you tie the knot and say your vows, you commit to spending the rest of your life with the person you love. Unless, that is, they decide to throw it all away for someone else. Unfortunately, cheating is one of the most common reasons why marriages fall apart.

And according to psychologist Briony Leo, “Research tells us that, on average, around 20 percent of men are unfaithful to their spouse, as compared to 13 percent of women.” However, she notes that these numbers only include self-reports, so it’s possible that even more people are cheating and just keeping it to themselves.

Research from the Institute for Family Studies also found that men become even more likely to cheat in their fifties, sixties, and seventies. However, not every marriage is incapable of surviving infidelity. In fact, 53% of relationships where at least one spouse has cheated are still intact.

That doesn’t mean that it’s easy to work through those issues. And of course, things can become much more complicated when there’s a baby involved. But it’s not unheard of for affairs to lead to new life. 

One study published in Current Biology estimates that, over the past 500 years, about 1% of the European population was born as a result of an extramarital affair. Meanwhile, in Australia, research has found that about 10% of children may have been conceived during an affair. 

Once a person has learned that their spouse got another woman pregnant, it can be extremely difficult to give the marriage another try. Richard Nicastro, PhD, notes on his site that infidelity trauma can lead to a wide range of emotions, including rage, disbelief, confusion, insecurity, anxiety, and deep sadness.

Young woman with curly hair and red lipstick looking uncertain, reflecting on affair partner's baby and complex family ties.

Image credits: Polina Zimmerman / Pexels (not the actual photo)

It’s natural to feel disgust for your partner after finding out that they’ve cheated

Navigating all of these feelings while trying to make decisions about the future of your marriage can be overwhelming. And as the author of this story noted, it’s common for those who have been cheated on to feel disgust towards their partner. 

“This kind of disgust doesn’t just make us turn away—it upends our sense of reality, forcing us to question the truths we once took for granted,” Dr. Nicastro explains. “This is the cruel nature of betrayal. It doesn’t just break your heart—it can prompt the same survival instinct that disgust was designed for, turning someone you once longed for into someone you can’t stand to be near.”

It’s natural for the mother in this story to want to keep things cordial and as “normal” as possible for her children, at least until the holidays are over. But as many commenters pointed out, she owes her son the truth.

PsychCentral warns that keeping secrets from kids can cause suspicion and resentment. It might also create a false sense of reality, which will be shattered when the truth inevitably comes out. 

Just because it’s not easy to be honest with your children doesn’t mean that it’s not worth it. Especially when they’re old enough to notice changes in their parents’ behavior, kids will start creating their own stories if they’re not given the full picture.

We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. How would you react if you were in this mother’s shoes? Then, if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article discussing similar family drama, look no further than right here. 

Later, the author responded to several commenters and provided some more context

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Advice on dealing with uncertainty about affair partner’s baby and complicated family relationships involving son’s ex.

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Readers shared sympathy for the mother, and many encouraged her to be honest with her son and file for divorce

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Man confused if affair partner’s baby is his child or grandchild, as she’s his son’s recent ex.

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