Lawyer Quits After Getting Engaged Caused Her Career To Go Downhill, Sparks A Debate About Sexism In Workplace

It’s 2022 — and gender discrimination at work is still a thing. Of course, women have made huge strides towards equality over the past few decades. The gender pay gap has shrunk dramatically in the US as women are only 16 cents away from earning the same as their male counterparts, compared to 36 cents in 1980. But while we celebrate these accomplishments, the fight doesn’t end. Time and again, women encounter stubborn biases and subtle ways in which sexism affects their lives and their careers.

As this woman shares in her ‘AntiWork’ confession, she experienced this firsthand. See, the thrill over her recent engagement swiftly turned sour after she announced it to the owner of her law firm. When her good news was met with a “When are you going to stop working?”, things started to go downhill. Fast.

The woman knew she was being treated differently. But instead of staying silent, she decided to take action. Scroll down to read the story in full, as well as the discussion about sexism at the workplace it sparked on the platform. Then be sure to let us know where you land on this topic, and if you’re feeling up to it, you’re welcome to open up about similar experiences you had at work or elsewhere in the comments.

After feeling the thrill of getting engaged to her boyfriend, this woman shared how the good news affected her career

Image credits: Mateus Campos Felipe (not the actual photo)

As she was discriminated against by her company, the user decided to take action

Image credits: yiyiphotos (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Citizenbeck

After reading the post, the ‘AntiWork’ community members jumped to the comment section to share their frustrations about the situation, offer advice, and urge the woman to leave reviews about her job online to warn other potential employees. While the story makes you wonder how anyone could survive in such a toxic workplace, gender discrimination at work is far more common than you’d think.

Pew Research Center found that around four-in-ten working women in the US — twice as likely as men — reported facing discrimination on the job because of their gender. One of the biggest gender gaps regards income, as 25% of working women said they earned less than a man doing the same job. The respondents also mentioned a range of personal experiences, like being treated as incompetent because of their gender, receiving less support from senior leaders, and being passed over for the most important assignments. Only because they are women.

Though the pay gap has shrunk, it still exists. According to Pew Research Center, women made 84 cents for every dollar earned by men in 2020. In other words, it would take 42 extra work days for women to earn what men did that year. “There’s still a significant gap,” Richard Fry, a senior researcher at the Pew Research Center, told CNBC. He explained three key factors contributing to the ongoing pay discrepancy: job type, discrimination, and shouldering caregiving duties.

But the fact that a new hire — “older male, go figure” — took over her duties sparks further questions. While women fight for equal wages, they also face a widespread problem of the gender promotion gap.

A 2021 report called Women in the Workplace conducted by McKinsey and LeanIn.org assessed the representation of women in corporate America with contributions from 423 organizations. The study stated that for every 100 men promoted to the first step up to manager, only 86 women are promoted. This refers to the ‘broken rung’ that refers to women in entry-level jobs being less likely to get a promotion to the first level of managerial positions. This, in turn, limits the number of women going into higher leadership positions and shrinks the diverse talent pool available.

Later on, the woman joined the discussion to clarify a few details

Sally Heady, a career coach and cognitive hypnotherapist, previously told Bored Panda that we tend to see great leaders as ambitious, strong, visionary, strategic, charismatic, and assertive. “As a result of societal conditioning and historical male dominance in leadership positions, many people, consciously or unconsciously, would still associate the word ‘strength’ or ‘ambition’ with a man. Even if they didn’t necessarily associate it with a man, they might associate it with a person who embodies those traits in a stereotyped ‘masculine’ way.”

“Whether we realize it or not, we have a natural predisposition to categorize ‘types’ of people in certain roles, purely because it’s easier on our mental load,” Heady continued. “This is why training on unconscious bias is absolutely crucial in addressing the promotion gap.”

“Unconscious bias is more dangerous than overt sexism in many ways because people don’t even realize the impact that societal norms, conditioning, and personal beliefs have on their decision-making. Without that awareness, the problem just continues.”

Career coach Heady explained it can be discouraging for women who want to progress if they doubt they will be treated fairly. This vicious cycle “might get in the way of women showing their full power and brilliance in a leadership role. For some women, this might even result in not bothering to apply for promotion because they don’t feel supported or that they don’t have the ‘backing’ of their organization, which is a crying shame.”

“Whilst there’s still a way to go in addressing inequality in the workplace, please don’t lose heart and keep going if you want a promotion. The world needs women leaders and voices like never before. You can be a leader and you can do it your way. Don’t squash yourself into the masculine model of leadership if it doesn’t feel good to you,” Heady concluded.

Here’s what community members had to say about the situation

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