Woman Devastated After Accidentally Getting A Nasty Text From A Friend She Wasn’t Supposed To Get

With mental health experts ringing alarm bells about the loneliness epidemic, friendships are becoming more and more valuable. Yet in the UK, one in 10 adults say they have no close friends. Perhaps some of these people have had bad experiences with friends.

Like this woman, who got an “accidental” text from her friend shaming her about her weight. As she was already in a vulnerable state, the woman wasn’t sure how to react. So, she decided to get opinions from the internet: was the friend’s comment inappropriate or was she just blowing things out of proportion?

To find out what psychological and emotional effects weight-shaming from a friend can cause, Bored Panda reached out to body image coach Stefanie Michele. She kindly agreed to tell us more about why there’s such a stigma amongst women for simply eating and why we’re all so entrenched in the cult of thinness. Read her expert insights below!

More info: Stefanie Michele | Life After Diets Podcast | Instagram

An accidental text showed this woman her friend’s true colors, when a text that was meant for someone else ended up in her inbox

Woman in glasses looking at phone, wearing a white sweater, seated near a plant, receiving text about weight comment.

Image credits: Gabrielle Henderson (not the actual photo)

In it, the ‘friend’ made awful comments about the woman’s weight

Text showing a friend’s accidental, insulting message about weight, causing upset and friend being labeled as horrible.

Text message screenshot discussing McDonald's breakfast and a voucher usage; context of accidental comment on weight.

Text discussing weight gain due to lifestyle changes, job stress, and lack of exercise.

Text conversation discussing accidental comment on woman's weight and its emotional impact.

Text message suggesting exhaustion, implying overwork, possibly linked to accidental comment on weight.

Text discussing accidental nasty text about weight, reaction, and claims of phone hack.

Accidental text sent to wrong contact, commenting on woman's weight.

Text describing a friend's accidental message about weight, sharing feelings of betrayal.

Two women in a kitchen, both holding phones and sharing a moment, discussing a text about weight.

Image credits: Frankie Cordoba (not the actual photo)

Embarrassed woman reflects on accidental nasty text about her weight, feeling humiliated and deceived.

Text message expressing concern about weight gain and pregnancy hormones affecting perspective.

Text message questioning feelings of betrayal after receiving an accidental rude comment about weight.

Image source: UtterlyHumiliated

“Catching a friend weight shame you behind your back is a breach of trust on multiple levels,” body image coach Stefanie Michele tells Bored Panda

Image credits: Art Almighty (not the actual photo)

However unpleasant and inappropriate it is, many people (especially women) have to listen to other people commenting on their bodies. Surprisingly, often these kinds of comments come from the place we associate with love and support – our friends.

Perhaps it’s because the people closest to us know which buttons to push to hurt us the most. In a 2019 survey, almost half of adults in the UK admitted they have been body shamed. The worst thing is that the majority of the respondents claimed that close friends are usually the source of this body shaming.

Body image coach Stefanie Michele, who encourages her clients to heal with an anti-dieting and intuitive eating approach, tells Bored Panda that when such hurtful comments come from a friend, it hurts us way more than if they were coming from a stranger.

“Catching a friend weight shame you behind your back is a breach of trust on multiple levels,” she points out. “Not only is the interpersonal relationship likely to be impacted by the betrayal, but also our sense of belonging on an existential level.”

“After all, if your friends don’t support you, who does?” Michele poses a hypothetical. “This level of insecurity can compromise our sense of social safety, which can foster symptoms of self-doubt, anxiety, and even depression.”

Even in 2025, thinness is still the ideal women are expected to strive for

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

The idea that a woman’s worth is directly tied to her thinness is toxic, but one that has deep roots in our collective psyche. For many women, it also starts in their early years. In 2009, Chinese researchers found that adolescent girls are more than twice as likely to hear weight-shaming comments from their peers, as well as their parents, teachers, and siblings.

Body image coach Stefanie Michele explains to Bored Panda that women are taught to sometimes feel guilty for simply eating. “There is an unspoken social agreement between women to eat as little as possible to comply with the moral code of ‘the good female’,” she observes.

“For generations, women have been conditioned to suppress their needs in service of others—and eating modestly is just one more way we’re taught to take up less space, both figuratively and literally. Our culture has normalized the value of feminine ‘smallness’ to the point that eating has become an indulgence, or even a violation, instead of a basic need.”

Our culture, according to Michele, promotes thinness as the ideal. And oftentimes, it comes at the cost of eating disorders in the worst case and a widespread pattern of disordered eating at best.

“As social beings, we look to others to understand what’s valued, what’s safe, and what gives us a sense of belonging or power. Where traditional media and celebrities once set the tone, social media now reinforces the narrative,” Michele notes.

“Trends like ‘What I Eat in a Day’ and SkinnyTok videos rack up millions of views, reinforcing the message that thinness isn’t just desirable—it’s the standard. The result is a relentless feedback loop of social validation and pressure,” the body image coach cautions.

People urged the woman to cut ties with such a horrible ‘friend’

Comment on accidental text about weight, advising to end toxic friendship for well-being.

Text message response to a nasty comment about a woman's weight, advising self-kindness and life changes.

Text exchange about a nasty comment on weight, highlighting a friend's betrayal and discussing phone hacking claims.

Text screenshot of a conversation discussing a nasty comment about someone's weight.

Comment about accidental text on weight, describing friend as two-faced and suggesting ending the friendship.

Text exchange about accidental nasty message on weight; a harsh response on being two-faced and vile.

Text about accidental mean message, focusing on toxic behavior and how some people feel good putting others down.

Text discussing accidental nasty comment on woman's weight.

Text message discussing weight and accidental nasty text, highlighting a friend's harsh comments.

Comment discussing a friend's hurtful accidental text about weight, stressing to block her and praising the husband's support.

Screenshot of a supportive text message about dealing with comments on weight during pregnancy.

Text conversation reaction discussing accidental nasty text about weight.

Text exchange criticizing weight gain and discussing betrayal.

Text message about weight comment, discussing pregnancy and dieting advice.

Text discussion about a friend's accidental nasty comment on a woman's weight.

Text exchange about accidental nasty remark on weight, discussing fat shaming and backstabbing behavior.

Text exchange discussing accidental message about weight and ending a friendship.

Text exchange commenting on weight, mentioning hacking and personal details, labeled "MrTiddlesTheCat.

Text reveals accidental comment on a woman's weight by a friend.

Poll Question

Total votes ·

Thanks! Check out the results:

Total votes ·

Newsletter

Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls

Subscribe

By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.

Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!

Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!