“You’re Really Gonna Make Me Do This?”: Woman Bursts Into Tears Over Son’s GF’s “Petty” House Rule

If they don't want shoes in the house, it's their house and his Mama needs to get over herself. The boyfriend also needs to tell his parents no shoes inside and to back off of his girlfriend. There are other countries and cultures where shoes are not worn inside.

Son can buy mama and dad nice slippers of there very own, and a basket of inexpensive, easily washed slippers of various sizes for other guests, kept in a nice chest by the door to sit on. If I knew you well enough to visit often, I'd bring a pair of my own to to leave there. I need arch support to walk across the house, but I'll bring my own house shoes if you let me know ahead of time.

Don't invite them over. Job done.

We never had that rule in our house growing up, and I don't have it now. Nor do any of my friends. BUT...if that is their rule, when I go to their house, I will take my shoes off. My house my rules, your house your rules. Just let me know, OK?

Gift her a trip to Japan.

I'd be tempted to make sure my shoes were really muddy when I next visited her house. Sometimes an example is the best educator. And definitely find her best rug before she has realised what you are doing.

My family doesn't care about shoes in the house, but I will absolutely respect someone else's rules in their own house. It's not hard to understand.

I am a diabetic and not "protecting" my feet could be harmful but if I knew this was a rule I would bring my own clean, slippers

Going to someone's home and knowing you might have stinky feet then wash your feet before you go, check your shoes if they stink, Then take slippers with you. Problem solved. I always have a pair of socks or slippers with me when we go somewhere. Even the maintenance guys, who come to fix something, they take their shoes off, withoug asking. It's common courtesy, unless the host says ok, leave the shoes on. But still, hesitantly.

Not understanding the YTA crowd. I live in a rural area, snow country, in northern United States, no one around here wouldn't even think of not taking off their shoes when entering someone's home, it's automatic, and many folks carry slippers with them. Shoes are filthy, I don't want dirt, muck, snow, etc tracked through my house, no one does.

Who TF wears shoes in the house? Like, why would you carry all the filth of public streets into your home where children might play on the floor? Insane...

At my house shoes are off at the front door. I live in the UK so I don’t want wet/muddy shoes all over my floors. The only person who was allowed to break that rule was my grandad when he was alive. Never had any complaints

The YTA comment that ends with "a******s abound!" Is a redundant statement

MIL thinks she's being disrespected? Try putting a pair of pink fuzzy bunny slippers in her exact size right next to the door and tell her you bought them especially for her.

If she doesn't like the proper rules then DON'T go over! Not your house ..not your rules!!!

I go against the grain and have the opposite rule in my house. We have a farm and lots of kids in and out all day. I’d go blue in the face if I tried to enforce a no-shoe rule. Even with daily mopping our floor is practically a dirt floor. No bare feet or socks allowed on our floor - shoes or slippers only.

As for the NTAs, when you are a guest in someone's house you BEHAVE. You have respect for the people and their home. If you have an issue, it's on YOU to find the solution or remove yourself from the situation. WTH is this "the customer.. I mean guest.. is always right." bull. Leave your entitlement, AND your shoes, at the door.

Lee Gilliland

Lee Gilliland

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Shoes in the house aren't standard anymore and mom needs to get over herself.

If her BF were a good partner, he would take ownership of the no shoes rule for their home, of communicating that rule to his family, and of dealing fully with the ensuing drama. And, if there is some medical or hygiene related foot issue, best keep it between family to save her embarrassment. Reads like it is long past time for him to step up to basic / base-level good partnering behavior. Or, as an alternative in keeping with their deference to her, he and his father could carry Mum around the house on a palanquin.

What will this lady do if she goes to Japan or dome other countries where is mandatory to remove your shoes when you go to a home or some other places??? She has to follow the rules, even if she doesn't "feel confortable"

I was raised in a "not shoes off family." I have a friend who's "no shoes in the house" person. Outside her door is a small rock saying "This is a No Shoes Inside House". Ok. No shoes inside for me. I always bring a pair of socks to her house. Easy peasy.

Okay, so we can mostly all agree that shows in the house is dirty at best and gross and rude at worst. But this isn't even about that. It's mom trying to throw her weight around to prove who really "owns" the boy/who the real boss it. Tactic one (bulldozing) didn't work, so she moved to tactic two (playing the poor victim and group shame/pressure).

I can’t speak for all of NZ but wherever I’ve gone people take their shoes off at the door. I don’t mind guests keeping their shoes on at our place but I always respect the no shoes rule when I visit.

Carpets are lovely. Carpeted floors are annoying as hell. My current apartment is much better than my old one in all ways except the stupid carpeted floors.

I provide slippers to guests who come often, their own slippers that they keep here on the shoe rack by the door. Everyone who comes here knows by seeing the rack that shoes are not worn in this home.

Canadian here. If people come to my home that don’t want to take off their footwear, I have a box of disposable boot covers. They can wear those over their footwear. Win-win.

Wow, if crying over taking shoes off is the most of your problems, I envy you.

I think she's the a*****e. If a guest knows about the "rule" yet still wears shoes anyways, you need to overlook it. You have zero idea if they have some weird foot thing they're embarrassed about, or medical condition which requires shoes, or if there are mobility problems which makes taking shoes on and off extremely difficult. It would be better to clean the floor after they leave than to embarrass and alienate them. You do not want to play the foot police. Even if they're seemingly fine going barefoot at home, do you really want to hear that they think they'll get fungus from your floors? Better to just overlook it.

I have to genuinely ask if wearing shoes in the house is a thing? I was not specifically taught to take my shoes off in the house. I never specifically taught my kids to take their shoes off in the house. I guess monkey see, monkey do applies, and probably how I "learned". But here's the reason I really ask, I have taken my shoes off in every house I have ever entered since I was capable of taking them off. As far I know, no one has ever had to ask me or told me to take my shoes off. It's automatic. My husband and kids also automatically take shoes of at other people's homes. Just thinking about wearing shoes in the house feels weird. I'm not sure I've even seen someone wearing shoes in a house except realtors. So I don't really know how to have an opinion to up vote people or not. This is f*****g with my head. The concept that people have it as a specific rule, that it isn't just automatically what people do.

People create unnecessary problems. Just buy the woman some house shoes to keep at her place and call it a day.

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The fact that OP refuses to get little shoe covers because it will "validate" her boyfriend's mother is proof that this is a power play between the two women. Just get the frickin shoe covers and tell her she has to wear them. Personally, I can't remove my shoes in your home, I need my special orthotics in order to walk or stand for any period of time. Making me go barefoot will cause me harm. I really appreciate those little shoe covers. They even come in colors other than blue now.