“AITA For Telling My Husband He’s Not Allowed In My Daughter’s Nursery?”

Rarely does an opportunity to celebrate, relax, or reward ourselves go by without having a couple of drinks. While it might not be an issue when done in moderation, parents in particular should be cautious when consuming alcohol, as being intoxicated around children can put them at risk of danger.

This story could’ve ended in tragedy if not for the mom who noticed her drunk husband holding their baby in time. Concerned about her safety, she kicked her spouse out of the nursery. Later, she started worrying that she might’ve been too harsh, so she turned online for unbiased people’s opinions.

Parents should be cautious when drinking alcohol, as an intoxicated state can endanger kids

Father holding upset baby in nursery as mom realizes husband has a problem and starts building an exit plan

Image credits: LightFieldStudios / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Unfortunately, these parents weren’t cautious enough, which could’ve ended badly

Text post discussing a mom banning her husband from the nursery after realizing he has a real problem.

Text excerpt about a mom dealing with her husband’s behavior in nursery environments, starting an exit plan.

Text excerpt illustrating a mom upset with husband over nursery responsibilities, hinting at an exit plan.

Text excerpt showing a mom sharing how she cares for her child alone while preparing for a full-time job.

Text about husband causing disturbance and mom realizing his real problem while planning an exit strategy.

Man sitting on couch holding his head in pain, illustrating husband with a real problem needing an exit plan.

Image credits: LightFieldStudios / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text describing mom’s concern about husband’s behavior in nursery, realizing a real problem and planning an exit.

Man struggling to open doorknob in nursery, revealing a real problem and prompting a careful exit plan by mom.

Alt text: Mom confronts husband in nursery as she realizes he has a problem and starts building an exit plan.

Father holding baby in nursery with a concerned expression, highlighting a family issue and planning an exit strategy.

Image credits: LeylaCamomile / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text about a mom banning husband from nursery and realizing he has a real problem while planning an exit strategy.

Mom bans husband from nursery, realizes he has a real problem, and begins building an exit plan for safety.

Mom frustrated with husband in nursery, holding baby, realizing he has a real problem and planning an exit strategy.

Image credits: nd3000 / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text excerpt highlighting concerns about husband's drinking problem and personal safety in a family setting.

Text discussing a mom noticing her husband's aggressive behavior and starting to build an exit plan due to a real problem.

Text excerpt showing a mom describing limited time with husband and her role as primary caregiver on weekends in nursery context.

Image credits: No-Block7487

Even a few drinks can make it more difficult to provide completely safe care for kids

Mom and husband in nursery with newborn, focusing on parenting challenges and building an exit plan together.

Image credits: korrawinj / freepik (not the actual photo)

While most new parents don’t consume alcohol in a way that puts their children at risk, even a few drinks can make it more difficult to provide completely safe care for kids. Alcohol can impair judgment and reaction time, both of which are crucial when caring for a baby or a young child and evaluating their needs. Liquor can also make adults feel more tired, making it harder to respond to a baby. An intoxicated state may also lead to risky decisions that parents normally wouldn’t make. 

So it’s always recommended that at least one sober adult be present who can look after any children. Having a sober presence can keep a baby safe, especially in the event that something unexpected happens. Of course, ensuring there’s a clear-headed person present requires planning ahead of time. One of the parents might decide to skip drinking or ask a loved one or a babysitter to help with childcare. 

While planning the caregiving situation, parents should also make sure that the baby has a safe space to sleep. It’s advised to never co-sleep when under the influence, which means having the baby in bed on an armchair or a sofa with you, as the risk of accidental suffocation becomes very high. 

The safest place to sleep for a baby is in their own separate, clear, firm, and flat sleep space, like a cot or Moses basket. The cot or Moses basket should be in the same room as the adult caring for the child. In general, it’s recommended that babies sleep in the same room as their parent or carer for the first six months. 

“Not drinking alcohol could be a good option for your family, especially during the first few months of your baby’s life,” concluded The Lullaby Trust. 

In some cases drinking can have a lasting effect on children

Man and young girl sitting on a couch in a nursery, engaged in a heartfelt conversation about family challenges.

Image credits: smokewree928 / freepik (not the actual photo)

As children get older, being around adults who drink, in some cases, can have a lasting influence on children. Parents are role models to their children, who are constantly watching them, so consuming alcohol even in moderation can send them the message that alcohol is safe for them too. Children can even experience anxiety and trauma if they see parents drinking higher quantities and becoming unpredictable.

To avoid these negative effects, open communication with children is key, says Dr. Kelli Komro, a professor and social and behavioral epidemiologist at Emory University.

“It’s important for parents to have good, open communication,” she said. “Talk about what’s going on and the age of appropriateness of alcohol use and why the drinking age set at 21 is to protect young people’s developing brain.”

Besides communicating with children about the consequences of alcohol consumption and establishing clear boundaries around it, the most important thing parents can do is model good behavior. 

“Parents have to remember whatever they do is what their children will mimic,” said George F. Koob, director of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. “If they start drinking and misusing alcohol, getting tipsy in front of the kids, that sets up a pattern that they’re going to emulate.”

All adults are advised to drink no more than 14 units of alcohol per week—something that every responsible grown-up should be aware of. “If you’re worried about your drinking or thinking about cutting down, your health visitor, family nurse or GP can support you,” concluded the Lullaby Trust.

The mom provided more information in the comments

Reddit conversation about a mom banning husband from nursery due to safety concerns and starting an exit plan.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing fatherhood and challenges faced by a mom banning husband from nursery.

Text conversation about a mom banning husband from nursery, realizing his behavior is a real problem, and planning an exit.

Comment discussing parenting conflicts and the husband’s behavior prompting an exit plan from the nursery situation.

Reddit conversation about a mom confronting her husband’s real problem in the nursery and starting an exit plan.

Text excerpt discussing a mom banning husband from nursery after reckless behavior, starting an exit plan.

Comment on mom banning husband from nursery, realizing serious problem, and starting an exit plan for family wellbeing.

Screenshot of a forum post discussing a mom banning her husband from the nursery due to a serious problem.

The majority sympathized with the mom, saying she did what she had to do to protect her baby

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a husband’s unstable behavior while holding a baby in a nursery setting.

Comment discussing a mom banning husband from nursery, addressing relationship issues and lack of support with child care.

Text excerpt discussing relationship issues where a mom considers banning husband from nursery and building an exit plan.

Woman shares story of husband banned from nursery due to real problem, and her decision to start building an exit plan

Screenshot of an online comment stating a husband needs to take control of his alcohol use or leave the family.

Comment about husband being too drunk to care for baby, highlighting a real problem and mom planning an exit from nursery.

Screenshot of a discussion about a mom banning her husband from the nursery due to his behavior and planning an exit strategy.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a mom banning husband from nursery and starting an exit plan.

Comment discussing parenting struggles and husband’s behavior, highlighting need for responsibility and possible exit plan.

Comment text highlighted in blue with username, saying a mom notices her husband’s problem and starts building an exit plan.

Comment about a mom needing to ban her husband from the nursery due to a serious problem.

Reddit comment discussing a mom having to ban husband from nursery and starting to build an exit plan.

Reddit comment discussing a mom banning husband from nursery due to his drinking and neglecting childcare responsibilities.

Comment discussing a mom banning her husband from the nursery due to his dangerous behavior with their baby.

Text excerpt discussing a mom banning her husband from the nursery due to his aggressive behavior and planning an exit.

Comment discussing safety concerns leading a mom to ban her husband from the nursery and plan an exit strategy.

Comment warning husband from nursery after tantrum, showing concern and starting to build an exit plan.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment stating support for a mom intervening, highlighting the husband’s problem and her exit plan strategy.

Comment about husband’s real problem and mom starting an exit plan after banning husband from nursery.

Reddit comment supporting mom who bans husband from nursery, highlighting the need for help and an exit plan.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing motherhood, instincts, and the husband’s problematic behavior in the nursery.

Comment about a mom banning husband from nursery due to his intoxicated behavior and building an exit plan.

Comment text on a forum warning about aggressive behavior and the need for an exit plan when living with a harmful partner.

Commenter shares experience as sober alcoholic recognizing husband’s real problem while caring for baby in nursery.

Comment warning about husband's excessive drinking risking wife and baby's safety, prompting a mom to create an exit plan.

Comment discussing setting boundaries as mom deals with husband’s drinking problem affecting parenting and household tasks.

Text post discussing a mom needing to ban her husband from the nursery due to serious parenting issues.

Comment explaining a mom banning her husband from the nursery due to his condition and planning an exit strategy.

Comment discussing concerns about a husband’s behavior around a baby and the need for an exit plan.

While some thought she was at fault in this situation

Comment criticizing partner’s behavior with birthday celebration, highlighting issues in relationship and exit plan discussion.

Text excerpt discussing a mom banning husband from nursery, highlighting relationship issues and safety concerns with the baby.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a mom addressing her husband’s behavior in the nursery and planning an exit strategy.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing relationship dynamics between a husband and daughter.

Worried mom holding baby closely inside a home, dealing with parenting and husband nursery ban challenges.

Image credits: drazenphoto / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Later, the mom shared an update

Text update about mom realizing husband has a real problem after banning him from nursery and planning an exit strategy.

Text excerpt discussing a mom realizing her husband has a real problem and starting to build an exit plan.

Text excerpt from a mom explaining why she had to ban her husband from the nursery, revealing his hidden problem.

Man lying exhausted on a green couch, illustrating a husband with a real problem needing an exit plan.

Image credits: gpointstudio / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text about husband checking into inpatient care and family helping with an exit plan after nursery ban.

Text on a white background reads about living 1500 miles from family with limited options, mentioning pooling money if needed, related to mom banning husband from nursery.

Mom realizes husband has a real problem after banning him from nursery, begins building an exit plan for safety and accountability.

Man looking worried and contemplative, highlighting a moment of realizing a real problem and planning an exit strategy.

Image credits: monkeybusiness / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text on a white background detailing saving money and building an exit plan in a separate bank account.

Image credits: No-Block7487

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