Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Couple Won’t Let Mean MIL See Grandkid, She Threatens To Call CPS Unless Things Change
Couple Won’t Let Mean MIL See Grandkid, She Threatens To Call CPS Unless Things Change
2

Couple Won’t Let Mean MIL See Grandkid, She Threatens To Call CPS Unless Things Change

39

ADVERTISEMENT

Grandparents aren’t always the sweet old people you hope they’d be. Some are entitled, some are overbearing, and others can be downright mean. This can leave parents in a sticky situation when it comes to letting toxic pensioners visit their grandkids.

One couple finds themselves in a concerning situation since finding out that their 3-year-old’s verbally violent grandmother is planning on calling CPS on them. The reason? They won’t let her see her grandson often enough. 

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    Grandparents aren’t always all that they’re cracked up to be, as this couple is finding out the hard way

    Distraught couple on sofa after altercation about neglectful MIL and CPS threat, with woman holding a mug.

    Image credits: Kampus Production / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Their 3-year-old son hates going to visit his grandma because she’s verbally violent and often screams and curses at him

    Text of a complaint about a neglectful MIL threatening to call CPS if not allowed to see her grandson.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Neglectful MIL frequently screams and curses at grandson, parents limit contact for child's well-being.

    Text describing a child's fear of his neglectful grandma when he hears the word "grandma.

    Child with red hair and plaid shirt wipes eyes, standing in a cozy kitchen setting.

    Image credits: Yan Krukau / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    The couple has decided to protect their son, so they’ve banned visits with the ill-tempered grandmother

    Text image discussing a neglectful MIL who spreads false rumors about her grandson's parents.

    Text describing neglectful MIL as unstable and selfish, expressing distrust from family and friends.

    Text-based image discussing preparation against threats from a neglectful MIL calling CPS on parents.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Elderly woman on phone, looking concerned, with neglectful expression in home setting.

    Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    The grandmother has now hit back with rumors of child neglect and threats of calling CPS on the couple

    Text discussing concerns about a neglectful MIL threatening family with CPS.

    Text excerpt discussing family proximity in Kentucky, US.

    Image credits: WeilageM

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Deeply concerned about what she’s capable of, the kid’s dad has turned to netizens for legal advice

    One couple is facing a heartbreaking and infuriating situation after deciding to limit contact between their 3-year-old son and his verbally violent grandmother. And the child’s reaction to hearing her name? Waterworks. According to OP, the grandmother yells, curses, and has been emotionally abusive, so they decided to stop taking him there.

    But instead of respecting their boundaries, the grandmother reportedly began spreading a dangerous lie. She’s telling family members that they’re neglecting their son—and that’s why they’re “hiding” him from her. The rumor is baseless, but it’s terrifying. OP says no one in the family believes her, yet she continues escalating the situation.

    She’s even considering calling Child Protective Services (CPS) on them. OP, understandably panicked, turned to an online community for advice. He’s unsure what to do or what records to keep. He’s wondering if he should document everything, collect medical records, and start a paper trail. The threat alone feels like emotional blackmail.

    OP’s son’s health is fine, and the couple has done nothing wrong—so technically, they shouldn’t have anything to worry about. But when someone is unstable and determined to stir trouble, even an unfounded accusation can cause chaos. OP adds that they live just down the street from her, which only adds to the tension and fear.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    From what OP tells us in his post, his future mother-in-law is a walking nightmare. The couple has put a sensible boundary in place, and for good reason, but she’s determined to overrun it. So, how can the couple protect themselves from the toxic woman? And what should they do if CPS does show up? We went looking for answers.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Two people sitting at a table, engaging in a serious discussion about family dynamics.

    Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    In her article for Choosing Therapy, Brooke Schwartz writes that toxic grandparents may engage in behaviors that leave a grandchild feeling hurt, trapped, or burnt out. Signs of a toxic grandparent can include verbal and emotional violence, jealousy of other relationships, ignorance of boundaries, narcissism, and creating divisions in the family. 

    According to Schwartz, some tips for dealing with a toxic grandparent include setting boundaries and sticking to them, stopping trying to meet or exceed their expectations, practicing self-care, avoiding them when possible, and practicing acceptance.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    According to the Chris Branson Law Firm website, there are a number of things the couple should do if CPS comes knocking. 

    First off, they should take the allegation seriously—CPS has to deal with every case that comes across their desk, no matter how ludicrous it may appear. Next, they need to ask what the allegations are. After that, they shouldn’t submit to a CPS interrogation until they’ve lawyered up but should remain polite while recording everything. 

    Since OP and his wife have done nothing wrong and their son is healthy and cared for, it’s unlikely CPS will even get past the front door. The real issue remains the grumpy grandma, but we suspect her fury will burn out once her CPS plan bombs. 

    What would you do if you found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think his future mother-in-law will ever back off? Let us know your opinion in the comments!

    In the comments, readers weighed in with practical suggestions and advice the couple could use to protect themselves from the toxic grandmother’s wrath

    Text recounts a story about CPS investigations by a neglectful MIL, discussing living conditions and past family experiences.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text advice on dealing with neglectful MIL threats involving CPS.

    Screenshot of a forum comment discussing a daycare passcode system for child safety.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a grandmother lacking evidence to accuse parents of neglect.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Poll Question

    Total votes ·

    Thanks! Check out the results:

    Total votes ·
    Share on Facebook
    Ivan Ayliffe

    Ivan Ayliffe

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    After twenty years in advertising, I've decided to try my hand at journalism. I'm lucky enough to be based in Cape Town, South Africa and use every opportunity I get to explore everything it has to offer, both indoors and out. When I'm not reading, writing, or listening to podcasts, I spend my time swimming in the ocean, running mountain trails, and skydiving. While I haven't travelled as much as I'd like, I did live in !ndia, which was an incredible experience. Oh, and I love live music. I hope you enjoy my stories!

    Read less »
    Ivan Ayliffe

    Ivan Ayliffe

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    After twenty years in advertising, I've decided to try my hand at journalism. I'm lucky enough to be based in Cape Town, South Africa and use every opportunity I get to explore everything it has to offer, both indoors and out. When I'm not reading, writing, or listening to podcasts, I spend my time swimming in the ocean, running mountain trails, and skydiving. While I haven't travelled as much as I'd like, I did live in !ndia, which was an incredible experience. Oh, and I love live music. I hope you enjoy my stories!

    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi! Here at Panda's I'm responsible for Photo Editing and all of the things surrounding it. I love finding great, moody or even dramatic photos to fit the story. Besides that, I'm a proud owner of 3 cats with the silliest names and a bazillion plants<3You can find me at a makeup counter with headphones swatching all of the sparkly eyeshadows

    Read less »

    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Rūta Zumbrickaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Hi! Here at Panda's I'm responsible for Photo Editing and all of the things surrounding it. I love finding great, moody or even dramatic photos to fit the story. Besides that, I'm a proud owner of 3 cats with the silliest names and a bazillion plants<3You can find me at a makeup counter with headphones swatching all of the sparkly eyeshadows

    What do you think ?
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's not much you can do if they do come, just be calm and answer questions honestly. Be reassuring about the visit to the kid, this person is just checking to make sure you're safe etc. How you are with the kid and how he reacts to personal questions will really inform the visit. With one kid in the home and no other red flags, it would be really unlikely that CPS would get involved last the initial visit. This may be different today if anyone is an immigrant, but in general CPS has more work than they can handle so the bar to investigate and take kids out of the house is very high.

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let her. I wound up with a best friend because his mom called them so often. CPS knows this kind of grandmother all too well, and dislike the fact they have to investigate the same complaint over and over.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    JB
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’d casually mention to the family members saying grandma is threatening to contact CPS that fraudulent claims can lead to serious legal consequences. And, since she is the one making threats, it would be easy to deduce who was responsible if CPS should turn up. Hopefully, they will pass the information on to FMIL and head her off. If not, she has been warned that OP will take legal action if she attempts to use CPS to harass them.

    Load More Comments
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's not much you can do if they do come, just be calm and answer questions honestly. Be reassuring about the visit to the kid, this person is just checking to make sure you're safe etc. How you are with the kid and how he reacts to personal questions will really inform the visit. With one kid in the home and no other red flags, it would be really unlikely that CPS would get involved last the initial visit. This may be different today if anyone is an immigrant, but in general CPS has more work than they can handle so the bar to investigate and take kids out of the house is very high.

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let her. I wound up with a best friend because his mom called them so often. CPS knows this kind of grandmother all too well, and dislike the fact they have to investigate the same complaint over and over.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    JB
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’d casually mention to the family members saying grandma is threatening to contact CPS that fraudulent claims can lead to serious legal consequences. And, since she is the one making threats, it would be easy to deduce who was responsible if CPS should turn up. Hopefully, they will pass the information on to FMIL and head her off. If not, she has been warned that OP will take legal action if she attempts to use CPS to harass them.

    Load More Comments
    Related on Bored Panda
    Popular on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda
    ADVERTISEMENT