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9
Why Experts Sound The Alarm On The Sudden Rise Of ‘Greys*xuality’ In Modern Dating Culture
A growing number of young people are identifying as “greys*xual,” which means they only experience attraction occasionally, rarely, or in specific situations.
The label has gained traction on TikTok, Reddit, and YouTube, offering many a way to describe feelings they once struggled to explain.
While some see it as empowering, others worry it reflects a wider “s*x recession” and shifting attitudes toward intimacy in younger generations.
Highlights
- More young people are identifying as “greys*xual,” a term for those who feel attraction only rarely or under certain conditions.
- Experts are split over whether the growing awareness is empowering or part of a broader “s*x recession” among younger generations.
- Social media is helping spread the term, but it is also sparking debate about overcomplicating gender identity labels.
RELATED:
Greys*xuality is on a spectrum, and it can overlap with other identities
Image credits: Chiara Guercio/Unsplash
The term “greys*xual,” sometimes shortened to “grey-A,” describes the space between being fully as*xual and experiencing regular s*xual attraction.
First used in 2006 on the Asexual Visibility and Education Network, it describes the “grey area” between being completely as*xual and feeling s*xual attraction regularly, according to theDaily Mail.
Greys*xuality has become quite popular on social media platforms. A dedicated subreddit for theorientation has attracted over 8,300 members while being very active.
Image credits: Roy Rochlin/Getty
Greys*xual YouTuber and podcaster Mark (@notdefining) has called the orientation “immensely helpful.”
“It helps people to understand that I do experience s*xual attraction, I do have s*x, I do enjoy s*x and s*xual fantasies, but I may experience them to a significantly lower degree than most people,” he said.
Many in the community have stressed that greys*xuality exists on aspectrum. It can overlap with other identities such as demis*xuality, where attraction occurs only after forming a strong emotional bond.
Image credits: tulisacontostavlos
While many people on the greys*xual spectrum still experience s*xual feelings or m*sturbate for pleasure or stress relief, others may have little to no interest in s*xual activity.
While online platforms for the greys*xual community have generally garnered praise, they have also drawn criticism from netizens who argue that the spread of nicheidentity labels is counterproductive.
Experts have warned that millennials and Gen Z are entering a “s*x recession”
Image credits: notdefining
Researchers have noted that millennials and Gen Z are reporting fewer partners and less frequent intimacy compared to older generations at the same age.
This “s*x recession” isn’t simply about disinterest. Studies have pointed to anxiety, body image pressures, digital disconnection, and even political debates over sexual rights as contributing factors to young people’s low intimacy.
US writer Carter Sherman, author of The Second Coming, found that many young people felt a sense of “fear and shame” around s*x.
Image credits: theyasminbenoit
These are fueled by unrealistic bodystandards on social media platforms like Instagram, exposure to p*rnographic materials, and polarized conversations about s*xuality.
Some critics have argued that creating new labels like “greys*xual” risks overcomplicating how people think about attraction and relationships.
Others have argued for the opposite, stating that having the right words and labels ultimately helps people understand themselves and find supportive communities.
Doctors and netizens weighed in on the emergence of greys*xuality and other orientations
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Doctors have emphasized that there is a difference between being greys*xual, where low or no sexual attraction is a consistent part of someone’s identity, and experiencing a sudden drop in libido.
Drops in libido could signal stress, depression, or underlying health issues. The NHS has even noted that loss of sex drive can be linked to heart disease, diabetes, thyroid problems, menopause, and even certain medications.
Netizens, for their part, seem to be quite split about the emergence of new orientations such as greys*xuality, with critics stating that the intense focus on attraction is unnecessary.
Image credits: Marek Studzinski/Unsplash
“I only think about s*x occasionally. Other times, I had to look after children, work, sleep, cook, enjoy hobbies etc.. All this time, I just thought I was having a LIFE!” one commenter wrote.
“Why do some people need to make up words, to label themselves to feel. It’s getting silly,” wrote another.
“I’m sure they are only coming up with these ridiculous terms in order to feel special. They are like vegans…can’t help themselves but to bleat their personal preferences to the world whether or not the world wants to hear it,” another commenter stated.
Others, however, have fully supported the emergence of “greys*xuality.”
Image credits: Freepik
“I’m just happy that vocabulary exists for all of us in a world where either it’s a punchline or a way to erase people in the name of ‘not labelling,'” one commenter wrote.
“31 and I honestly haven’t been able to identify so much with a label as I’m able to with this one,” another wrote.
“I’m well into my 50s, and realized I’ve been gray-ace my whole adult life,” wrote another commenter.
Netizens shared their thoughts on greys*xuality on social media
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What do you think ?
Tabitha 3 months ago (edited)
It sounds like the normal ebb and flow of attraction to me. People can’t be laser focused on s*x 24/7/365, because they have jobs and bills to pay.and other interests in their life. There’s nothing wrong with only feeling attraction in certain circumstances, or only if there’s a true bond between you and the other person. TBH, it’s a hell of a lot safer to be that way, for which no alarms are needed, than it is to only indulge in impersonal hookups which is what people should be ringing alarm bells about.
Ace 3 months ago
I hate all these labels, always have. All they ever seem to do is define a set of conditions you need to satisfy to 'belong' in that particular subgrouping. And the more of them there are, the more excluded it can make people feel who don't conform exactly to any of the defined types.
Emilu 3 months ago (edited)
I think some people need that sense of belonging, because they might feel alone IRL or because people don't necessarily understand their point of view without a label (eg: my bestie's first wife refused to let bestie drive me to work, even though he would be driving literally past my door, because she thought we'd cheat on her. It took "we've known each other for over a decade and nothing's happened yet, and also E's ace" from the bestie to get her to relent. I definitely agree that labels can also serve to alienate anyone that doesn't fit nicely into those 'boxes', though.
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Kiki Likes Sweets 3 months ago
FFS!! You can't even say sëx now? If you can't even print sëx, why even have articles about sëx? Absolutely pathetic!!!
Tabitha 3 months ago (edited)
It sounds like the normal ebb and flow of attraction to me. People can’t be laser focused on s*x 24/7/365, because they have jobs and bills to pay.and other interests in their life. There’s nothing wrong with only feeling attraction in certain circumstances, or only if there’s a true bond between you and the other person. TBH, it’s a hell of a lot safer to be that way, for which no alarms are needed, than it is to only indulge in impersonal hookups which is what people should be ringing alarm bells about.
Ace 3 months ago
I hate all these labels, always have. All they ever seem to do is define a set of conditions you need to satisfy to 'belong' in that particular subgrouping. And the more of them there are, the more excluded it can make people feel who don't conform exactly to any of the defined types.
Emilu 3 months ago (edited)
I think some people need that sense of belonging, because they might feel alone IRL or because people don't necessarily understand their point of view without a label (eg: my bestie's first wife refused to let bestie drive me to work, even though he would be driving literally past my door, because she thought we'd cheat on her. It took "we've known each other for over a decade and nothing's happened yet, and also E's ace" from the bestie to get her to relent. I definitely agree that labels can also serve to alienate anyone that doesn't fit nicely into those 'boxes', though.
Load More Replies... Kiki Likes Sweets 3 months ago
FFS!! You can't even say sëx now? If you can't even print sëx, why even have articles about sëx? Absolutely pathetic!!!
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