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“Divorced Three Months Later”: 50 Times Gifts From Partners Were Truly A Red Flag
Gifts are a way of expressing affection. For the most part, you don’t need to spend too much on them, as long as they’re practical and/or meaningful.
On the flip side, gifts are also a way of realizing how much someone doesn’t know you enough, if at all. These women of Reddit would know, and they are sharing their experiences involving their romantic partners in a recent thread.
Most of these stories are worthy of a facepalm. However, others were so bad that you’d understand why the relationship ended (yes, it went that far).
If you consider yourself a terrible gifter, scroll through and perhaps take notes on what you shouldn’t do.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
This isn’t the gift that made me realize, but it should have been. Our first Christmas together, I got him a custom-made, 3D printed action figure of himself. I designed matching packaging, and paid extra for the version you could record a message on, and recorded what he once told me would be his “entrance music”.
He got me groceries. Literally groceries. And they sat unrefrigerated under the tree for two days before I opened them in front of my family, who knew all about the cool action figure I spend weeks on. Humiliating.
Took longer than it should have, but we are no longer together lol.
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#2
My ex bought a bunch of p**n DVDs. Yes, this was in the age of the internet. Because I assume the p***o DVD market is grateful for any and all purchases, they included a free mini bottle of massage oil. I got that bottle of massage oil as my birthday present. So that I could give him a massage.
Fun bonus: when I kicked him out and his mom came to collect his things, I put the DVDs right at the top of the box.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 1 month ago
Revenge returning of stuff is so satisfying. I had a partner dump me by phone whilst he was working abroad. I took all his stuff and dumped it at his Dad’s house because I knew he didn’t have a good relationship with him!
#3
My (ex) wife got me one of those candy bar bouquets for my birthday. You know the ones...different candy bars glued to sticks, then arranged in a "bouquet". Popular at Walmart and gas stations.
One.....it was 2 weeks *after* my birthday
Two.....I'm diabetic
That was one of the last straws before I left.
#4
He took me to the mall the day of my birthday to pick out my own gift, then bought himself something instead.
Edit: we divorced three months later.
#5
Okay, get ready:
Ex boyfriend comes to pick me up to go to his apartment for a “special evening”. During the car ride (almost an hour) he goes on and on and ON about that special evening that he has planned out and how he has a surprise for me that I will never forget.
Well, both the special evening and the unforgettable surprise was that he had shaven his balls. He was hoping for it to be this whole thing.
The worst part? I like my men hairy.
#7
When we first met, Pokémon was a thing so he got me a size small jigglypuff shirt and said it would motivate me to lose weight.
#8
Omg finally a chance to tell my tale of woe. I had a partner who would give me random gifts. Now I know what you are thinking, 'that's so sweet'. No. No. All of the gifts were completely random or objectively FB ad garbage. This story comes from more than a year into our relationship.
One day, I opened my door to find a massive box from Nuts.com. Now I have nothing against Nuts.com, they make a good product, but the items I received from them couldn't have been more face-palm.
1. Almonds (I have a fairly severe allergy)
2. Dried Mango (I loath mango)
3. Dried Pineapple (also allergic)
4: 1lb of Chocolate (I am a type 1 diabetic)
I gave almost all of the gift away. The next gift he gave me was a pound of bacon from my local supermarket. He left it on my porch in the dead of summer. I wasn't home. I came home to stinking, completely melted, and rotting bacon on my porch.
#9
For my birthday one year, in August mind you, my husband went to the local GROCERY STORE and got me a gift basket that said “Happy Father’s Day” (you know, the holiday in June… for fathers… I’m a child free woman in my 30’s).
Sue Denham 1 month ago
Oops. When you're taking advantage of the post-Fathers' Day sale, guys, remember to remove the label.
#10
A State Farm mug (his mom was a state farm agent,) and it was full of little chocolate bars. I am SEVERELY allergic to chocolate and he knew this. He didn’t even buy the chocolate or the mug. It was a part of a bunch of free gifts his mom’s job were giving away to customers and he swiped one.
#11
When he said s*x was a gift 💝 then complained when I didn’t accept his idea because he said that I wanted it and so he was finally going to give it to me only because I wanted it.
#12
My husband of quite a few years bought me a meat slicer for Christmas one year. I have never in my whole entire life either needed or wanted to slice meat with a meat slicer.
I was so upset and embarrassed so I hid it from my parents who were there with us. I returned it of course and bought myself a Kindle instead.
#13
My bf gave me a bath bomb and a pink yeti wine cup for Christmas… I staunchly never take baths, I’ve never owned anything pink in my adult life, and I’d never had wine at that point. When I finally said “hey wth none of these reflect anything about me” he admitted it was a regift from his mother 🙃 no shame either! He thought it was better than nothing! It wasn’t!
#14
One Christmas, my ex husband got me a Home Alone Pop Doll and a handful of those little brain-teaser puzzles you get in the toy section at Barnes and Noble. We hadn't ever watched that movie together, I have no affinity for it, and i dont even collect those dolls. And I famously hate those little metal puzzles. I was devastated and exploded into tears. I had spent a lot of money and thought on a beautiful watch to replace his that had broken. He doubled down and insisted he had put a lot of thought into the gifts and was furious with me for being "ungrateful".
This was just one of many red flags and i am happy to say I wised up and we divorced in 2020 and I am now engaged to someone whose gifts make me tear up because they know me so well.
#15
A Nintendo DS. With only games that he wanted to play. When we broke up, he took it with him.
#16
As a teen, my then-bf gave us a date to Buffalo Wild Wings.... I was a vegetarian 😭😂.
zububonsai 1 month ago (edited)
For my 18th birthday a very close and thoughtful (not sarcastic) classmate proudly presented to me a pottered and glazed ... ashtray with my initials. I , confused, "Umm, Stefanie, I... don't smoke?" She looked very surprised, "but sometimes your clothes smell like cigarettes, though very faintly?" "Yeah, that's because I'm regularly at my best friend's house 🫣". So, I thanked her nonetheless because she paid very close attention what I might find useful, took the time to make that thing far in advance... I felt so bad for her but we remained good friends
#17
My ex of maaaaaany years ago gave me cooking lessons. I was 20 and he was 30…I had ZERO interest in cooking at that time (trust me, my mama tried) and was LIVID. His mom was a SAHM to 6 kids and I always felt like that’s what he wanted. My 20 year old feminist self was NOT amused. We broke up 1 month later.
Veronica Jean 1 month ago (edited)
Here's the thing about big age differences: take it as a huge red flag. If it's the only red flag, okay. If there more, run.
#18
A haircut. HIS haircut, specifically. We were long distance and he had me cut his dreads off on my birthday weekend when I came to visit (I am not a hair stylist or even close). When asked why he didn’t even get me a card, that’s when he called the haircut my gift. Never once did I say that I didn’t like his hair or suggest a haircut so it really made zero sense to me.
#19
I once had a ex give me peanut butter chocolate from sees candy for Christmas… I’m deathly allergic to peanuts.
#20
An argument.
they told me i was too vague (even tho i made a list w visual aids, just in case since they were a visual person) with pricepoints all over the board, and gift ideas that were free (e.g. massage, read me a story, etc.).
they also then said it was my fault for being too picky, despite being open to different ideas. then they said it was because we were tight on money (and then proceeded to come home w a new motorcycle days later).
this was all within the same week of the same year. they were surprised when i left.
#21
A waist trainer so I would lose weight.
#22
My ex put one of his old tshirts in a box then complained that I was materialistic when I was upset.
#23
My husband threw me a surprise party and I hated it so much. I cried when everyone popped out and did the whole “surprise!!” thing. Everyone thought I was crying because I’m a sentimental person (which I am) but I cried because I was so upset that this what my evening was going to be. I hate surprises.
Emilu 1 month ago (edited)
Ugh, OP, I know you’ll never read this but I’m sorry. I’d hate a surprise party as well and I’m not a crier, but I probably would if this happened to me because anybody that actually knows me would know that a surprise party would be something you’d only do to me if you actively hated me. (Case in point: My ex is my ex primarily because he tried to disguise my birthday party as a celebration for his mum, then got pissed when I didn’t want to go. I have social anxiety.) Some people love surprises; some people detest them.
#24
This is going to sound dramatic to some but recently my partner of 8+ years called me all excited hyping up how he got me a gift that I’m going to love. Comes home and hands me a can of dairy cold foam. I don’t consume dairy in any form. This made me open my eyes a lot and made me realize he genuinely doesn’t know me nor gives a s**t to.
#25
A box of Slim Jims for Christmas. We’d been dating 5 yrs. I spent over $100 on his presents despite not having a job at the time. He’s a trust fund baby.
Yeah so that felt like s**t.
ETA: not that money determines the worth of the gift. I would have been sooo happy with something thoughtfully homemade (in fact, would have preferred it). But I got him merch from his favorite sports teams and stuff for his favorite hobbies… annnnd he got me a box of Slim Jims 😐.
#26
My ex got me a garden hose and sprinkler for mother's day one year.... we didn't have a yard.
#27
Ex-bf gave me an engraved stone vase that was originally intended as a gift for his mother (he forgot that I was the one who took him to the store so he could purchase it). I took one look at it and told him that it wasn't my taste but his mother's and that he was welcome to give it to the person that it was originally intended for.
He obviously didn't realize that I would remember how he obtained the vase and he wanted to say that he got me "something." I told him to keep the vase and gave him his freedom after dropping him at the Amtrak station to go visit his mommy with the vase in tow.
Afterwards it was like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders.
#28
My ex gave me a Pandora charm of a ghost strung along a normal necklace chain. I don’t wear jewelry, and I only like very dainty stuff if I do. But he thought the ghost was cute and didn’t understand that they’re bracelet charms 😂
He also gave me a skateboard deck (I don’t skateboard, he did) and a booster box of Pokemon cards (I don’t collect them, he did). Both of those mysteriously stayed in his possession after the breakup lol.
My high school boyfriend also gave me the lovely birthday gift of leaving me on the week of my birthday to do a road trip with the boys, and then going to a strip Club on my actual birthday and not calling me. Ahhh, good times.
My partner now, however, got me a custom made allergy friendly chocolate cake for my birthday + a little crocheted bee keychain. The guy knows me ❤️.
#29
My ex always got me jewellery in silver. Every. Single. Time. I’d mention I don’t really wear silver, and he’d say he’d remember for next time. But then I would get… more silver jewellery. Not even like nicer silver stuff, but like the cheap stuff that would get gross quickly.
sfgothgirl 1 month ago
Hey, there's a lady with the opposite problem on here! Too bad we can't get them together so they could swap! Swap jewelry, but perhaps men too if that's how they roll.
#30
Well my ex gave me Reese’s for Christmas (it was probably the only thing he remembered about me besides my family). Just that and nothing else. Whereas his mom got me a cute cup and adorable socks!
I miss his mom more than him lol
Also his sister :)
When he broke up with me, she apologized, said that I deserved better, that her brother was an idiot, and cussed his a*s out lol
And she’s not wrong. I definitely deserved better than him.
DennyS (denzoren) 1 month ago
A very understated part of breakups...the people you also loose that were mutual.
#31
My exhusband picked out the ugliest engagement ring, he was very focused on it being flashy(it was three big princess cut diamonds that came out to 3carats and sat very high in the setting), instead of thinking about my style and what I’d actually like to wear everyday. It was very gaudy
By contrast, the “engagement”(in quotations because we aren’t going to actually get married, just live in sin) ring my current partner gave me is an aquamarine stone, with small blue sapphires around it. 10/10 no notes.
#32
Earrings. My ears weren’t pierced.
#33
He got me a top saying 'I have the best husband ever', a book of date ideas and an ugly heart shaped jewellery box for Christmas. He had typed into amazon 'present for my wife'. When I asked why he didn't get me a book as I love reading, he snapped " I don't know what books you like". We had been together 9 years. This was Xmas 2024. We are now divorcing. Just one of the many small cuts. FYI my presents to him were thoughtful. And the book of date ideas had many ideas I had suggested and he had said no to as they were too boring.
DennyS (denzoren) 1 month ago
If you've been together 9 years and don't know the books she likes...save her the trouble and just divorce yourself.
#34
My sons dad always bought me jewellery. Which is sweet but he was very much 'I am alpha man and women are lesser'. So no matter how many times I told him not to. He still bought me jewellery. Usually like a silver necklace with a star, I had one with a horse and a bracelet. I don't wear any form of jewellery at all. I've kept them all, and I keep the horse one because he said it was from my son on mother's day (my son was about 4 months old).
He was the kind of person where you would sit and listen to them talking about their day and venting and you'd have a back and forth conversation but then the minute I spoke about me he would interrupt and cut me off mid sentence after about 30 seconds. He was just never interested in me as a person, only what I could do for him.
I think about the difference between him and my other ex sometimes. He knew me really, for our first Xmas together he got me a box that was filled with boost (the energy drink), 3 bottles of tomato ketchup and a mass effect hoodie. That's the kind of s**t I want.
#35
3 years and living together—for my birthday he got me/us tickets to HIS favorite artist that I literally never ever listened to. He got tickets for his twin brother and childhood friend to come too. I told him the gift didn’t really have anything to do with my interests and he got defensive at first, saying he thought it was a nice idea as something to do together for an activity. He later admitted he wanted an excuse to drop hundreds on them and didn’t have gift ideas for me . Was the last straw in feeling like he was in his own world and I ended things soon after that.
#36
An ex once gifted me a bright pink tshirt, with a dog on the front, and it said, ‘I didn’t fart, my butt blew you a kiss’. We are middle aged. That was promptly donated.
#37
My dad once gave my mom a toilet seat cover.
#38
My ex got me the "gift" of absolutely nothing and then called me crazy for getting upset with him over it. Oh and this was on my birthday btw.
sfgothgirl 1 month ago
I thought this lady had a hand full of whipped cream or shaving cream and I was *very* confused!
#39
My ex bought me Tupperware, the kind with lids attached. After watching an infomercial about them, commenting he thought they were cool, and me saying I didn’t like them. 🤷♀️.
#40
My ex bought himself a new top of the line Kindle just before my birthday. He said I should get one, but I had no interest, I liked my nice books.
On my birthday he gifted me his old one, all beaten up and scratched.
#41
A locket on Mother’s Day…I don’t wear jewelry and I found out he bought his mother the same one.
#42
My ex boyfriend once bought me a tent for my birthday. We went camping one time before that and I was pretty vocal about how much I disliked it.
#43
I strictly wear silver, minimalist jewelery. My ex boyfriend would get me bold statement pieces - that were gold of course! I called him out after the first few pieces and he said he liked them and wanted to see me in more of that. LOL no thanks, dumped.
#44
My ex forgot my bday, showed up late to the dinner after I told him. Ubered there drunk and bought a gas station rose on the way. Then obliviously asked one of my friends to give him a lift home without a care. Ugh why the hell did I give him so much grace. Low effort through and through.
#45
My ex (about ten years ago) asked what I wanted for my birthday and I said I just want to spend the day bbqing on the lake with you and our friends. He went to the mall to shop at Victoria's Secret and flirt with the girls working there. I never wore anything VS and hated pink, and he came back with all pink VS stuff that was also all too small for me also. It was humiliating- but not as bad as the videos some of my friends took of him unknowingly while he was macking in the mall.
I dumped him and gave him the VS bag back and said he would be plenty busy making his return and replacement exchanges, and don't call me again. He got married a few months later and I realized after that I was the only girl he'd ever dated for a lengthy time that he didn't marry. Because I wouldn't marry someone I'd only been with for a year. Dodged a commitment bullet there.
#46
An egg boiler, which he gifted to his brother and mother in the past, and they liked theirs. I hate boiled eggs.
Josephine Blogs 1 month ago
Today I learned there's such a thing as an egg boiler. Here I am boiling my eggs in a saucepan like a neanderthal.
#47
An Amazon echo show… so we could see recipes when we are in the kitchen. I don’t cook much, we had never cooked together, and I had told him already that I was getting my mom a new echo show because hers was broken and he somehow thought it was a good idea to get me the same thing I was getting my mom. To add to the hurt, weeks before Christmas he asked me what I wanted and convinced me to tell him because it would be so much easier for him, so I sent him the website for tickets to a play I wanted to see. It was playing on Valentine’s Day and I said to him, it would be easy for him to knock out two birds with one stone.
Illustrious G 5 days ago
I don’t understand why it’s a bad thing to have to ask for what you want. Yes, it would be great if your SO just knew the perfect gift to get you every time, but to always have some big surprise is a hard ask, especially after a few years. I usually pick out a significant gift for myself and ask hubby to get a “small surprise” for me to open. It’s usually candy or a cute stuffed thing I’ll like and in the end I get what I want with no hurt feelings!
#48
Not my current partner, he's pretty spot on when it comes to getting me things but there was one dude from before that got me a box of cereal for Christmas. A box of cereal. Oh and a candy bar. Like, wtf, who does that😂😂 we didn't last long after that.. obviously the effort wasn't there.
#49
I’ve been quilting for years- many before I even met my ex-husband. For our last Christmas together, he got me a beginners quilting supply kit- full of things that I already had as I wasn’t a beginner quilter. Then he got pissy because I wouldn’t use any of it. I’d been curating my own supplies for years based on my likes & needs, so I didn’t need his Wal-Mart b******t (nothing against anyone that gets supplies at Walmart, but he definitely got the absolute cheapest option and none of it would have lasted). It was definitely one more item in the list that finally convinced me to divorce him.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 1 month ago (edited)
At least he knew they liked quilting! I absolutely get that unless you are specifically into something you don’t know what are good/bad buys for it.
#50
Before Christmas years ago. Ex bf gave me gift cards that he won at his job🙄probably totaled 30 bucks at a maximum. I had spent more than that for him. He had a knack for splurging on himself.
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Boo 1 month ago
After 27 years together, hubs and I give each other cash. Romantic? Maybe not, but it works for us and then we don't end up on lists like this lol.
Tyke 1 month ago
Mine and I tend to go out for a nice meal instead giving a gift
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Bat cat in a hat 1 month ago
An ex absolutely lost his shít when I gave him a box of home baked muffins. I baked the muffins myself, bought and customised the box with expensive decorations, hand made a card etc. He thought I was "cheap" because I didn't buy a "proper" gift. What he got me, you ask? Oh, a very basic, as in for young children, Scalextric (slot cars) set - I never expressed any interest in that whatsoever and I was in my mid 30s!
BeesEelsAndPups 1 month ago
I would have loved the muffins. Blueberry muffins remind me of the best days in my childhood. My friend's mom was English, and she made a big English breakfast for his friends every month. There were sausages and muffins and beans, syrup and bacon. She made amazing blueberry muffins. Then we'd play outside until sunset.
Load More Replies... Boo 1 month ago
After 27 years together, hubs and I give each other cash. Romantic? Maybe not, but it works for us and then we don't end up on lists like this lol.
Tyke 1 month ago
Mine and I tend to go out for a nice meal instead giving a gift
Load More Replies... Bat cat in a hat 1 month ago
An ex absolutely lost his shít when I gave him a box of home baked muffins. I baked the muffins myself, bought and customised the box with expensive decorations, hand made a card etc. He thought I was "cheap" because I didn't buy a "proper" gift. What he got me, you ask? Oh, a very basic, as in for young children, Scalextric (slot cars) set - I never expressed any interest in that whatsoever and I was in my mid 30s!
BeesEelsAndPups 1 month ago
I would have loved the muffins. Blueberry muffins remind me of the best days in my childhood. My friend's mom was English, and she made a big English breakfast for his friends every month. There were sausages and muffins and beans, syrup and bacon. She made amazing blueberry muffins. Then we'd play outside until sunset.
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