“How The Hell Is There Sand In Here?” And 30 More Stories Of Doctors Not Holding Back With Language

weird, and a little creepy to tell all about it and brag like that. But at least he took the time and cared enough to learn, and major props to his wife for teaching him

How is this not standard medical training?

He should teach all doctors! Amazing man!

I just had one also . I'm late 50's. Thought it was plastic not metal. And best one I ever had. Told Doctor she was amazing!

I thought it was going somewhere very different, thankfully it ended up not creepy

Hahahahha. Once i had between my pinkie toe and the one before it got jammed in a doorway and ripped it open. I go to the hospital and the nurse asks the Dr how she should sew it up. He lost it on her, a sweet older woman, and began insulting her for asking. I said doc, don't be a fn dikk and answer the question. He gave her advice after they both picked thier jaws off the floor. He left her to it and she profusely thanked me. I also gave that doc a review on exactly as it went down using big buzz words. "I felt threatened," "he made me feel ill..." etc.

apply cold water to the burn

Having worked with some sh!tty docs in my career, this is funny as h3ll

It helps to know that when dealing with a nasty co-worker.

lol

I had neck surgery years ago, where I received a part of a donated bone. As part of it the surgeon installed a butterfly-shaped piece of titanium plate and four screws to hold the bone in place. I asked the doctor if they drill pilot holes in the bone to thread the screws into. He said "Pretty much."

I would trust this doctor with my life!

I would have asked that before surgery.

yes, POWER TOOLS-

I love doctors and specialists like this! Obviously you've to know the patient! But some of my specialists, doctors and nurses got to know my sense of humour, sometimes funny, but I've a very dark sense of humour and they got that 💜 Like when I was left alone in the new wing that didn't have a lot of staff for 40 minutes to an hour waiting for the Specialist, I was unable to walk at all? "Well, at least no zombies turned up! That'd have p*ssed me off seeing as I'm unable to run!" He laughed!

I bumped my way down an entire flight of stairs on my rear end. Later that day, after my doctor had seen my x-rays, he said to me, "Broke your a$$, didn't you?"

Been there, broke that. Can't perform any exercises that push my coccyx into the floor. Now that I'm arthritic, it's a real *bone* of contention.

Poor OP. But yeah that's hilarious. How did he treat it?

Good one!

I didn't break it (according to the x-ray) but just bruised it while tripping/sliding on the stairs. It hurt for 2 years. Sitting was either half laying down (sagged) or entirely straight up, and when that went sort of back to normal I mostly felt it when getting up after having sat. After 2 years I could sit (and stand up) normal again without pain.

Number one cause of hairy palms I've heard

Was it - I'm glad it's a filthy habit - or - I'm glad, it's a filthy habit??????

Omg, these stories are great! 😂

I would love to have a doctor like that

Sitting in the common area of my unit at prison, I was studying some chess openings. One of the women came up to me, and said I shouldn't play with myself like that in public.

Note to guys approaching "that age "; female doctors usually have smaller hands. Choose wisely.

Many of my former students are local doctors. But when I needed to choose a new physician, I excluded all them from consideration. When one of them asked me why, I told her "I love my former students who have become doctors, and I am intensely proud of them. But I'm not going to allow any of you - not even the best - perform a prostate exam on me. No, not happening!"

Had a very cute female doctor do the same. Not the first time that's happened, but the first time I had to pay $35!

A few years back I had a DRE and went to pay the AU$275 account. The receptionist said “Now for the hard part”, to which I quipped, “er, No it’s not” 😅

"You can put the erection away now sir!"

Maybe next week his hair was pink, too.

I like girls with unique hair colors. Back when I was in like Kindergarten,there was a girl in my class Janessa who had white hair. People made fun of her for it,but not me. I complimented her and made a friend almost instantaneously.

Why does his having blue hair make it strange? He likes blue, and doesn't like pink. Simples.

I have the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

"Ok good. You're having a heart attack." r/brandnewsentence

"I stop him and him if they..." I'm pretty sure that doesn't make sense

just the "okay good, You're having a heart attack" 100% what you should say to someone having a HEART ATTACK-

Long day in ER?

it turns out your blood is very red! good job

That's telling him.

So for 15 years the sugar levels were not well controlled?