Son Shuts Down Dad Wanting To Forcibly Visit By Saying That Visitation Rights Apply Only Until 18YO
Complicated relationships can’t get any better until all the people involved make an effort to fix what’s broken. In parent and child relationships, the onus should be on the adults to make things right for their kids. But that isn’t always the case, and neglectful parents are usually the first to point fingers instead of taking responsibility.
This is what a teen faced when he had to choose between being with his dying cat or attending his dad’s wedding. He told people all about his dad’s meltdown.
More info: Reddit
Neglectful father loses his temper at his son who skipped attending his fourth wedding to be there for his childhood cat who was being euthanized
Image credits: Kindel Media (not the actual photo)
Teen shared that his parents got divorced when he was 7 and since then, his dad barely made any effort to visit him, to the extent of even forgetting his birthday
Image credits: Jeremy Wong (not the actual photo)
The boy’s childhood cat was being put down on the day of his dad’s 4th wedding so he decided not to go and clarified that he had attended the other 2 weddings
Image credits: Nam Quân Nguyễn (not the actual photo)
After the son said he didn’t want his dad to visit anyone, his father reminded him of his visitation rights, which, the poster pointed out, didn’t apply anymore as he had turned 18
Image credits: Beneficial_Comb_60
The teen also clarified that his mom didn’t deliberately schedule the euthanasia appointment on his dad’s wedding day, it was just the earliest appointment available for their cat
The Original Poster (OP) mentioned that his parents got divorced when he was only 7 years old. Even though his dad had visitation rights, he would only make an effort to see his son once a week. After that, the visits became less frequent and sometimes only happened once a month. The boy shared that his father cared so little that he did not even remember his birthday.
The teen then told netizens that his childhood cat was being put down and that his mother had scheduled the euthanasia appointment. Unfortunately, it fell on the same day as his dad’s wedding. People felt that she had deliberately chosen that date for the appointment, but the teen clarified that it was the only day available for them to get the appointment for their cat.
In the comments he also shared, “she paid the vet bills and everything for our cat, having raised our cat! I just listened to her when she said she talked to our vet and that this is the earliest appointment she could make and that I should be there to say goodbye. I just did as she instructed and believed she’s doing her best. I still believe she did the best she could.”
A study on the mental health of kids who experienced a pet’s death found that it could lead to intense mental distress and depression for three or more years after losing the animal. Research states that the strong emotional attachment to the pet is the reason for such intense feelings. In this case, the teen might have already been struggling with the death of his childhood cat when his dad decided to pile on him.
Image credits: Engin Akyurt (not the actual photo)
The poster mentioned that even though he told his dad that he wouldn’t be able to attend his wedding, his father berated him over the phone. He kept shouting at the kid and told him not to choose his cat over him. But the boy stated that he had already been to his dad’s 2nd and 3rd weddings and did not feel like it was a “big deal” if he missed the 4th.
Research on the death of pets has found that “while euthanasia has been mentioned as both a unique and controversial practice with regard to pets, playing an active role in the termination of a pet’s life may cause distress, guilt, and depression in the pet owner.” While dealing with all of these complicated feelings, the boy also had to deal with his father’s anger.
Since his dad kept getting angry, the boy lost his cool and told him that if he continued to be a jerk, he shouldn’t visit anymore. The teen said that he had turned 18 six months ago and that technically, the father’s visitation rights did not apply anymore. He also mentioned that if his dad cared so little, he should not visit at all.
Family law states that child support and custody arrangements are terminated when a child turns 18 and that the kid is free to choose where to live and how often to see each parent. According to the son, apart from not visiting him, his dad also did not make much of an effort to pay child support. The kid clarified this in the comments saying, “he stopped paying when I was 16. He told us he got into debt. My grandpa and grandma took over so my mom didn’t sue. They stopped when I turned 18.”
The boy was right to set a boundary with his father and put him in his place. Commenters also agreed, saying that his dad shouldn’t have thrown a tantrum considering that it was his fourth wedding. Do you think the boy was right to stand up to his father? What would you have done in the situation? Let us know in the comments.
Netizens told the teen to get back at his dad who was furious he missed the wedding by telling him that he’d be there for the next one
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I've chosen my pets over my mother/sister a number of times. Two years ago, my mother told me to euthanize my dog Stilgar when he started showing symptoms of distemper and said "You can always just get another puppy." Well, Stilgar is still alive, he is still my dog, and I talk to my mother as little as I can XD I'd absolutely choose to be there for a pet over my family members for anything short of a medical emergency/literal deathbed situation on their part.
The very-much-alive Stilgar XD stilly_cup...86ba5a.jpg 
He got into to some debt when his son who he barely saw was 16 but in the 2 years he was not paying child support he found another sucker to marry him and had the funds for a wedding? Yeah right. The dudes is a smooth and slimy conman thru and thru. Had his parents pay his child support even, what a class act. Glad the son knows how to prioritise correctly, the nerve to be offended when he is such a s****y human being much less a parent....he has been thru 4 marriages in 11 years, ick.
Yeah the sheer rapidity of the marriages really gets me. I though maybe the OP is the result of marriage 2 or 3 not marriage 1 but no, he's from marriage one. So his divorce-romance-marriage-divorce cycle is apparently under four years. Just ridiculous.
Load More Replies... I would choose my pets over almost anything, but certainly anytime over a wedding, regardless who's it is - leasing my beloved pet to die alone to attend a wedding - people who would even consider that should not have pets - they are not some toy, but living beings and family members. That said-
That said - he will probably have ample opportunity to Attendorn some more weddings of his "dad"
Load More Replies...
Dad's 4th wedding? To be honest, after his second I would have told him I wouldn't be attending any more weddings come what may. Expecting everyone to be as excited and present as if it was his first wedding is ridiculous and shows a lack of proportion and a massive sense of entitlement. OP absolutely did the right thing: his father always has the opportunity for a fifth wedding, but OP will never have a do-over with his precious cat. Not being there for his cat would have haunted OP: why would his father want that for him? Oh yes, I forgot: he's not really a nice person.
I’d say an eighteenth birthday is much more important than a fourth wedding. If he forgot one, you can skip the other. Being with your cat is more important than an absent father.
My pets always come 1st. When I was visiting my daughter years ago, my cat, Felix, took a turn for the worse. I changed my return flight so I could be there with my cat. Even though daughter kept disappearing throughout the visit, for what I found out later was to have an affair, she was very upset with me leaving early. I raised that cat since it was 2 days old and he meant more to me than a visit that could happen again. Felix died the day after I returned. It meant the world to be with him at the end.
Sorry, but 4th marriage? I would have been to enough, thank you. I would have gladly stayed with the dearest cat. No matter what you offer me, I'd stay with my baby...
Personally, after the first marriage I wouldn't make much of an effort to attend for the same person. And dad's on his 4th marriage? What's to say this one will last? And he hasn't made much of any effort to be in his son's life in 10 years. Yeah, my cat means more to me than my dad's 4th (and not likely last) marriage.
While your cat may be only a part of your life, YOU are your cat's ENTIRE life. They chose you. Not being there, holding your cat, comforting them as they leave this world, would be aweful. The poor cat would be looking for you, and be alone and scared instead. Your ersatz father, on the other hand, has made it clear that you are not a priority in his life. He cannot even be bothered to remember your birthday. You don't owe him anything.
I've chosen my pets over my mother/sister a number of times. Two years ago, my mother told me to euthanize my dog Stilgar when he started showing symptoms of distemper and said "You can always just get another puppy." Well, Stilgar is still alive, he is still my dog, and I talk to my mother as little as I can XD I'd absolutely choose to be there for a pet over my family members for anything short of a medical emergency/literal deathbed situation on their part.
The very-much-alive Stilgar XD stilly_cup...86ba5a.jpg
He got into to some debt when his son who he barely saw was 16 but in the 2 years he was not paying child support he found another sucker to marry him and had the funds for a wedding? Yeah right. The dudes is a smooth and slimy conman thru and thru. Had his parents pay his child support even, what a class act. Glad the son knows how to prioritise correctly, the nerve to be offended when he is such a s****y human being much less a parent....he has been thru 4 marriages in 11 years, ick.
Yeah the sheer rapidity of the marriages really gets me. I though maybe the OP is the result of marriage 2 or 3 not marriage 1 but no, he's from marriage one. So his divorce-romance-marriage-divorce cycle is apparently under four years. Just ridiculous.
Load More Replies... I would choose my pets over almost anything, but certainly anytime over a wedding, regardless who's it is - leasing my beloved pet to die alone to attend a wedding - people who would even consider that should not have pets - they are not some toy, but living beings and family members. That said-
That said - he will probably have ample opportunity to Attendorn some more weddings of his "dad"
Load More Replies... Dad's 4th wedding? To be honest, after his second I would have told him I wouldn't be attending any more weddings come what may. Expecting everyone to be as excited and present as if it was his first wedding is ridiculous and shows a lack of proportion and a massive sense of entitlement. OP absolutely did the right thing: his father always has the opportunity for a fifth wedding, but OP will never have a do-over with his precious cat. Not being there for his cat would have haunted OP: why would his father want that for him? Oh yes, I forgot: he's not really a nice person.
I’d say an eighteenth birthday is much more important than a fourth wedding. If he forgot one, you can skip the other. Being with your cat is more important than an absent father.
My pets always come 1st. When I was visiting my daughter years ago, my cat, Felix, took a turn for the worse. I changed my return flight so I could be there with my cat. Even though daughter kept disappearing throughout the visit, for what I found out later was to have an affair, she was very upset with me leaving early. I raised that cat since it was 2 days old and he meant more to me than a visit that could happen again. Felix died the day after I returned. It meant the world to be with him at the end.
Sorry, but 4th marriage? I would have been to enough, thank you. I would have gladly stayed with the dearest cat. No matter what you offer me, I'd stay with my baby...
Personally, after the first marriage I wouldn't make much of an effort to attend for the same person. And dad's on his 4th marriage? What's to say this one will last? And he hasn't made much of any effort to be in his son's life in 10 years. Yeah, my cat means more to me than my dad's 4th (and not likely last) marriage.
While your cat may be only a part of your life, YOU are your cat's ENTIRE life. They chose you. Not being there, holding your cat, comforting them as they leave this world, would be aweful. The poor cat would be looking for you, and be alone and scared instead. Your ersatz father, on the other hand, has made it clear that you are not a priority in his life. He cannot even be bothered to remember your birthday. You don't owe him anything.
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