What’s life without a bit of silliness in it? In true fashion of these funny quotes you’re about to read, the answer should be along the lines of ‘a serious one.’ Yet, what we truly had in mind with this question is this - a life without at least a bit of silliness is bland, boring, and hardly digestible. After all, when you turn everything and everyone (including yourself!) into a serious matter, everything starts to seem so grave and looming. So, if you catch yourself feeling like that, best read one or two silly quotes! That’s why we have made this list - so silly inspirational quotes will always be at the ready for you when you need them.
In fact, some of these phrases are quotes about silliness itself, like the famous quotes from Einstein or Handey. Turns out even silliness cannot be taken too seriously! Then, there are some smart aphorisms, short sayings, and snarky comments of which you might’ve never thought before, but once they are in front of you, you just get them instantly. Then there are, of course, silly love quotes. Because love is plenty of things, including, but not limited to, silliness, too. And lastly, a group of impactful yet silly motivational quotes - because if you’re a bit like us, you’ll agree that motivation doesn't necessarily come with a furrowed brow or a dire forewarning. Sometimes you just need to see things from a different perspective, so why not choose silly!
With the accolades dedicated to silly quotes nearing their end, it is probably time for you to actually check them out. You know where to find them, right? Once you are there, be sure to give the best quotes a thumbs up (and a click on the arrow button pointing upwards) and share this article with your friends!
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“Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” - Mark Twain
“If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.” — Ace Ventura
“My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.”
“I’m not insane. My mother had me tested.” — Sheldon Cooper
“It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.”
“After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, ‘No hablo ingles.’” - Ronnie Shakes
“At every party there are two kinds of people – those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.” - Ann Landers
“I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.”
“I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.” - Edith Sitwell
“My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he’s 97 years old and we have no clue where he is.”
“Nice perfume. Do you have to marinade in it?”
“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.” — Mark Twain
“I fear one day I’ll meet God; he’ll sneeze and I won’t know what to say.”
“I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’em later.” — Mitch Hedberg
“The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.”
...or a genius. Sometimes you just don't make sense, sometimes you speak the wrong language, and sometimes you just need to chew and swallow before you talk to people.
“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile from them, and you’ll have their shoes.” - Jack Handey
“Old people at weddings always poke me and say you’re next so I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.”
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” - Bernard Baruch
“But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.” - Carl Sagan
“On the internet you can be anything you want. It’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.”
“There are more airplanes in the water than there are submarines in the sky.”
“My mother always used to say: the older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”
“I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.” — Rodney Dangerfield
“When a stupid man is doing something, he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.” - George Bernard Shaw
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.” - Alan Dundes
“Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, ‘Jesus! This cup is expensive!’” - Conan O’Brien
“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.” - Albert Einstein
“I am responsible for what I say but I’m not responsible for what you understand.”
“Stupid people will mistake your confidence for arrogance.” - Habeeb Akande
“I think if we tell people that the brain is an app, they will start using it.”
“You have attributed conditions to villainy that simply result from stupidity.” ― Robert A. Heinlein
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.” — Phyllis Diller
“Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’”
“As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.” — Sir Norman Wisdom
“If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off?”
“Inside me there’s a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.” - Bob Thaves
“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” - Brooke Shields
“Beauty fades, dumb is forever.” ― Judge Judy Sheindlin
“I never forget a face but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.” — Groucho Marx
“If people did not sometimes do silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.” - Ludwig Wittgenstein
“Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.” - Bill Vaughan
“Scientists say the world is made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. I they forgot to mention morons.”
“I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.” - Walt Disney
“He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.” ― P.G. Wodehouse
“My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.” — Bobby Boucher
“When you see a couple walking down the street holding hands and laughing, you look over to your side and the only thing you’re holding is a half-eaten sandwich.” - Violet Matters
“It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.” - Jerome K. Jerome
“It costs to be stupid. The stupider you are, the more it costs.” - Sherrill Brown
"If a cricketer, for instance, suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, which he could do very easily, I mean, are you going to ban cricket bats?" - Prince Philip
“Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.” ― Euripides
Euripides would be a good name for someone who has a lot of gas.
“Stupidity isn't punishable by death. If it was, there would be a hell of a population drop.” ― Laurell K. Hamilton
“Sometimes a man wants to be stupid if it lets him do a thing his cleverness forbids.” ― John Steinbeck
“You know you’ve reached middle age when you’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police.” — Joan Rivers
“Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a seat missing, but it hurts.” — Lt. Frank Drebin
“I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.” — Bob Hope
“I started the week with a big box of patience. The box is empty now.”
“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.” - Horace
“Make yourself look really stupid so you don’t feel bad doing something a little stupid.” - Mark Hoppus
“My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.” - Chuck Nevitt
“It isn’t pollution that is hurting the environment, it’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” - Dan Quayle
“There are much easier things in life than finding a good man. Nailing Jell-O to a tree, for instance.”
“The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.” ― Harlan Ellison
“If your brains were dynamite there wouldn't be enough to blow your hat off.” ― Kurt Vonnegut
“There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: babe, district attorney and Driving Miss Daisy.”
“I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death. This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral, you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.” — Jerry Seinfeld
“If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised.” — Clark Griswold
The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.” — Clairee Belcher
I think a woman who embraces the surname Belcher is a strong woman.
“A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.” — Graham Norton
“Here’s some advice: at a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give 110 percent. Unless the job is a statistician.” — Adam Gropman
“Humans beings always do the most intelligent thing… after they’ve tried every stupid alternative and none of them have worked” ― Richard Buckminster Fuller
“To be stupid, selfish, and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost.” - Gustave Flaubert
“The problem with educating stupid people was that they didn’t know they were stupid. The same went for curing crazy people.” - Chuck Palahniuk
“The downside of playing dumb is that you sound dumb.” - Rachel Maddow
I wrote a haiku on this subject: The world thinks I’m dumb, silent raven gobbles eyes, me not dumb you dumb.
“Someone comes to my house and asks me, “Where do you live?” it is at these moments question the intelligence of the human race.”
“What did one cat say to the other cat... nothing cats don’t talk. Meow.”
“I can eat a man, but I’m not sure of the fibre content.” - Jenny Éclair
“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?” ― Laurence J. Peter
“Ned, I would love to stand here and talk with you — but I’m not going to.” — Phil Connors
“Breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. You can’t do it in one push; you got to rock it back and forth a few times, and then it goes over.”
“Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.” ― Criss Jami
“I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall.” ― Derek Landy
Can not keep track of how many people I know that fit this description.
“Sometimes I listen to the stranger’s conversation and mentally give my opinion.”
“I didn’t like the idea of being foolish, but I learned pretty soon that it was essential to fail and be foolish.” - Daniel Day-Lewis
“People do not wish to appear foolish; to avoid the appearance of foolishness, they are willing to remain actually fools.” - Alice Walker
“If pessimism is despair, optimism is cowardice and stupidity. Is there any need to choose between them?” - Francis Parker Yockey
Here is a haiku on this subject: I hate optimists, Plump spider cocoons grandpa, stupid optimist.
"I know you can be underwhelmed and you can be overwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?"
"I know you can be underwhelmed and you can be overwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?"
