Woman Wants To Know If She’s Wrong For Not Agreeing To Pay For Her Stepdaughter’s Competition Trip
Always believe in people. Especially if they are your relatives. Even if you are extremely rational and understand that there are few chances for success – you must understand that these chances are still always there. Like Buster Douglas had in 1990, like the Giants had in 2008, like David had in only God knows what year before Christ.
Always believe in people, and try to take into account in your layouts the likelihood of their success. And then, quite possibly, if this success finally happens, it will be much easier for you. Especially if the issue is related to your family or finances. And if both with one and the other at the same time – then even more so.
Still don’t believe it? Then, as proof, here is this post by user u/together_unknown, who has gained more than 7.5K upvotes and about 1.4K different comments in the AITA Reddit community in just two days. In this story, by the way, the father did not believe in his own daughter’s success – and here is a sad result for him.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post is married to a man called Joey and they both have daughters from their previous marriages
Image credits: Dani Jace (not the actual image)
However, the post was not written on behalf of the father, whom we have already mentioned, but by his wife. So, the Original Poster and her husband, Joey, have two daughters from their previous relationship: the OP’s 10-year-old Hailey and her husband’s 11-year-old Jenna.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
The woman and her ex expected their daughter to win her cheerleading competitions, so they had been deliberately saving money for her upcoming trip to the main finals in Florida
Both girls are involved in cheerleading, and more recently, regional competitions took place, the first and second places of which received the right to perform in Disney. According to the OP, Hailey’s team looked like a clear favorite, but Jenna had a much weaker team.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
Accordingly, realizing that Hailey was likely to go to Florida, the OP and her ex-husband (the girl’s dad) saved money for the upcoming trip throughout the whole season. As for Joey, he rationally assessed the chances of his daughter’s team, and did not save anything (both spouses fund their daughters separately).
Image credits: u/together_unknown
Ironically, the woman’s daughter lost her competitions, while her husband’s daughter, however, became the winner
And when the time came for the competition, Hailey’s team, despite its status as a favorite, lost – but Jenna and her team, on the contrary, became the winners. Of course, the whole family was happy for the girl and sincerely congratulated her.
Image credits: Marc Levin (not the actual image)
The problems started later, when Joey realized that he needed to shell out a fairly decent amount from his own pocket for his daughter’s trip to Florida. The man, as we already understand, did not have this money, they could not organize a family trip either, and Joey, according to his wife, does not believe in loans when it comes to the family.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
Joey had no money to fund his daughter’s trip, though he had to find it anyway
According to the competition rules, the team could resort to crowdfunding, but the parents still had to provide the main amount. Moreover, if one of the team members cannot go to the final competition, then the whole team must withdraw. In other words, in this case, Jenna would actually “frame” all her teammates.
Image credits: Nenad Stojkovic (not the actual image)
However, the family actually had enough money for the trip. The only problem was that it was Hailey’s trip money, which was collected by the OP and her ex, and which Joey had absolutely nothing to do with. However, the husband still tried to persuade his wife to pay for Jenna’s trip – but she flatly refused.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
The man asked his wife to fund her stepdaughter’s trip with the money saved for her own daughter, but she refused
A family quarrel broke out, during which Joey called his wife selfish and also allowed himself a few more inappropriate expressions. It’s good, the OP recalls, that she had the foresight to send Hailey to her biological dad’s house so that she would not become a witness to the scandal.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
As a result, the OP asked her ex to let the girl stay with him for a few more days while she packed up and left for her parents. True, even there, as she admits, Joey got her with his annoying texting and calls literally demanding that she pay for Jenna’s trip. The OP herself, in a conversation with Hailey’s father, agreed that they would partially pay for her daughter’s braces installation, and another part of the collected amount would go to the next cheerleading season.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
People in the comments mainly sided with the wife, while stating that the man should in any case find this money to prevent a big upset for his daughter
We must say that most of the commenters, realizing that in the situation with Jenna, of course, they would still like the girl to go to the competitions she deserved, sided with the OP regardless. Perhaps, people in the comments suggest, Joey could’ve come up with an idea to just borrow some of the money from the OP and then gradually return it. In any case, of course, the husband should apologize and think about how to resolve the issue of his daughter’s trip to Florida without conflict with the wife.
Image credits: u/together_unknown
By the way, marital conflicts over children involving separate finances are a fairly common thing in this world. It is enough, for example, to read this post of ours about a husband who had to pay child support for his five children from two different wives. And besides, we are already looking forward to your comments on this tale as well.
Don't know how to break it to all you proud parents out there...those Disney competitions that your lil champions are "invited" to...don't mean a thing. EVERYONE is invited, they happen 365/year, everyone is a winner (especially Disney) and those trophies don't mean a thing. Same is true for whatever "TRAVEL TEAM" little Janie or Johnny is on. It's a SCAM. I know coaches who have bought yachts from running these stupid travel teams and camps. If your kid wants to go to Disney, stop paying for the SCAM travel teams, use that money and take the family to Disney. It's all the same. Disney is just dressing it up as a FAKE athletic event.
I LOVEEEEE this!!! This is 100% TRUE!! This happens in every town too. One mother I know will say, "I can't let them pass up the opportunity to be on this team!!" *eyeroll* Her girls are on the team because her inlaws are loaded and pay up front for all of their cheer c**p. That's the only reason they are on so many teams. Those kids doing flips are a dime a dozen.
Load More Replies...
If you have a child and/ or are marrying someone with a child then please let go of the idea that you can manage your respective kids' expenses separately. There a million ways for this to go wrong and the children will suffer as a result. If you really want to keep things separate, just date and live separately till the kids are independent adults.
^ this. It's so weird to me that people would "split the kids" financially. You married to be together so work together.
Load More Replies...
Reddit almost ALWAYS sides with OP. I find it hard to believe that they can truly keep ALL finances for their daughters separate. Don't the daughters live with them, at least part of the time? Do they buy separate food for them? If either gives their stepdaughter a ride in their car, do they tally up the gas that was spent? It seems like OP is disappointed for herself and her daughter because she expected to be able to go to Disneyworld with her and now that won't happen, so she's subtly "punishing" the stepdaughter for her success and her entire team in the bargain. She's definitely saving her money, but not her relationships. Maybe she should just go back to the ex?
Likely separate expenses means extra expenses, like cheerleading uniforms, fees for extra lessons, thing like that, not food, house room or other things that could be considered household expenses.
Load More Replies...
Don't know how to break it to all you proud parents out there...those Disney competitions that your lil champions are "invited" to...don't mean a thing. EVERYONE is invited, they happen 365/year, everyone is a winner (especially Disney) and those trophies don't mean a thing. Same is true for whatever "TRAVEL TEAM" little Janie or Johnny is on. It's a SCAM. I know coaches who have bought yachts from running these stupid travel teams and camps. If your kid wants to go to Disney, stop paying for the SCAM travel teams, use that money and take the family to Disney. It's all the same. Disney is just dressing it up as a FAKE athletic event.
I LOVEEEEE this!!! This is 100% TRUE!! This happens in every town too. One mother I know will say, "I can't let them pass up the opportunity to be on this team!!" *eyeroll* Her girls are on the team because her inlaws are loaded and pay up front for all of their cheer c**p. That's the only reason they are on so many teams. Those kids doing flips are a dime a dozen.
Load More Replies... If you have a child and/ or are marrying someone with a child then please let go of the idea that you can manage your respective kids' expenses separately. There a million ways for this to go wrong and the children will suffer as a result. If you really want to keep things separate, just date and live separately till the kids are independent adults.
^ this. It's so weird to me that people would "split the kids" financially. You married to be together so work together.
Load More Replies... Reddit almost ALWAYS sides with OP. I find it hard to believe that they can truly keep ALL finances for their daughters separate. Don't the daughters live with them, at least part of the time? Do they buy separate food for them? If either gives their stepdaughter a ride in their car, do they tally up the gas that was spent? It seems like OP is disappointed for herself and her daughter because she expected to be able to go to Disneyworld with her and now that won't happen, so she's subtly "punishing" the stepdaughter for her success and her entire team in the bargain. She's definitely saving her money, but not her relationships. Maybe she should just go back to the ex?
Likely separate expenses means extra expenses, like cheerleading uniforms, fees for extra lessons, thing like that, not food, house room or other things that could be considered household expenses.
Load More Replies...
52
66