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Vegan Mom Feels Uneasy After Learning Neighbor Keeps Feeding Her 6YO Huge Meals, Asks What To Do
Young child eating meat and eggs at a wooden table despite being a vegan child fed by neighbour.

Vegan Mom Feels Uneasy After Learning Neighbor Keeps Feeding Her 6YO Huge Meals, Asks What To Do

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Everyone wants good neighbors whose houses they can just pop into for a cup of tea, or where their children can play safely. There are many people like this who are very welcoming and extend a lot of hospitality to whoever pays them a visit. 

Unfortunately, one vegan mom took issue with her neighbor’s kindness because she felt they were overfeeding her daughter. She also didn’t like that they were giving the kid meat, and hadn’t yet said anything to them. The whole situation left her feeling anxious and annoyed.

More info: Mumsnet

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    Sometimes, friends and neighbors offer children food as a way to take care of them and make them feel like they’re a part of the family

    Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    The poster shared that her six-year-old daughter often played with the neighbor’s grandson, and that although she knew her neighbor, they weren’t as close

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    Image credits: Holiak / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    The woman didn’t like that her neighbor, who was the boy’s grandmother, kept feeding her daughter full meals with things like sausage, trifle, and chips

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    Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Apart from the fact that her daughter was getting fed so much, the mom also didn’t like that her neighbor was giving the child meat, as they were a vegan family

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    Image credits: AwayWeb

    The poster’s husband felt that the situation was harmless, but the woman felt odd about it, as she hadn’t given the neighbor permission to feed her kid

    It’s great that the poster’s daughter had a friend just next door with whom she could go and play anytime. The OP shared that her neighbor was the young boy’s grandmother and looked after him when he came back from school. Apart from that, the poster hadn’t really interacted with her next-door neighbor and had just waved or chatted with her briefly.

    In situations like this, where parents have concerns about how their children are being treated or looked after in other homes, it is crucial first to vet the adults who live there. Taking time to speak to them and spending time in their house is the best way to make sure your little ones are in a safe environment.

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    It doesn’t seem like the mom was concerned about her daughter’s safety, but she was probably worried about the fact that the girl was being overfed. Many times, the girl had come back home stating that she had been given full meals, including dessert. This obviously left the mom concerned, as she hadn’t consented to her kid being fed all of that.

    According to experts, feeding the neighborhood kids isn’t something that parents should go overboard with. Giving them a simple snack or juice box is good enough as a show of hospitality, and it doesn’t have to go further than that. It’s possible that the grandma felt that she was showing the young kid kindness by feeding her a lot, but it was proving to be too much.

    Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    The poster and her family were also vegan, and the child followed that diet at home, so it was also worrying that the little one was being given meat when she was next door. All of these factors made the OP uncomfortable, and she didn’t know what to do. Her husband didn’t think it was such a big deal.

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    It’s generally a rule of thumb that people should respect and follow the meal practices that each household sets for itself. In a case where a family is vegan, it’s respectful to eat their food and not request they eat or make non-vegetarian food. In this situation, since the mom hadn’t informed her neighbor about them being vegan, it’s understandable that she kept feeding the child other food items.

    What many people suggested the woman should do was to go over to her neighbor’s house and talk to her about the situation. Rather than getting angry about it and stirring up drama, she could explain why she didn’t want her daughter to be fed so much and what the grandma could do instead.

    Between the mom’s concerns and the grandma’s hospitality, the little girl was probably getting the best choice of food. Hopefully, she still gets to enjoy tasty meals, but maybe a bit more in moderation.

    What do you think the mom should do in this situation? Do you think she’s fussing over nothing? We’d love to hear your honest thoughts on this story.

    People were divided on the issue, with some thinking that the poster was getting too worked up, and others feeling that she was in the right

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    Beverly Noronha

    Beverly Noronha

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    You can call me Bev! I'm a world-class reader, a quirky writer, and a gardener who paints. If you’re looking for information about tattoos, Bulbasaur, and books, then I'm the NPC you must approach.

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    Beverly Noronha

    Beverly Noronha

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    You can call me Bev! I'm a world-class reader, a quirky writer, and a gardener who paints. If you’re looking for information about tattoos, Bulbasaur, and books, then I'm the NPC you must approach.

    What do you think ?
    Tyke
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So OP admits she doesn't really know the woman but let's her daughter go there long enough to be fed? Go over, invite the woman round for a cup of tea, get to know her and tell her the kid is vegan and she doesn't want her having meat/dairy/etc. She's not a jedi.

    Onan Hag All
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The kid isn't vegan, she's had veganism imposed on her.

    Load More Replies...
    greenideas
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I gotta say I'm in the "let it go camp", because being too restrictive with food is a sure way for the daughter to develop an eating disorder. Hopefully, the neighbor isn't one of those people who purposefully gives animal products to vegans - she was told they're vegans and clearly disregarded it. Hmm.

    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not so sure that the neighbor "disregarded" being told the whole family is vegan as much as it's the child seeing the neighbor preparing a food with meat/animal product in it for her own grandson and says "That looks/smells good, may I have some?" OP is old enough to choose to be ethically vegan and that's fine, but her daughter is 6 and probably doesn't understand the ethical angle of it and just wants to eat what looks/smells/tastes good. I'm not saying it's proper for the neighbor to allow the daughter to consume meat if she knows OP/her mom wants her to eat only vegan, but that it may not be the neighbor forcing the issue at all. I know a 6-year-old is going to want to try something that looks or smells tasty.

    Load More Replies...
    tori Ohno
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she's feeding her own grandson and offering the little girl some food as well. It would be rude, and cruel, no to. If it bothers mom do much, tell Grandma to kick her daughter out of the house and go home when the boy eats. Which do you want, a heartbroken little girl, or one who gets a piece of trifle and a fish stick?

    Load More Comments
    Tyke
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So OP admits she doesn't really know the woman but let's her daughter go there long enough to be fed? Go over, invite the woman round for a cup of tea, get to know her and tell her the kid is vegan and she doesn't want her having meat/dairy/etc. She's not a jedi.

    Onan Hag All
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The kid isn't vegan, she's had veganism imposed on her.

    Load More Replies...
    greenideas
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I gotta say I'm in the "let it go camp", because being too restrictive with food is a sure way for the daughter to develop an eating disorder. Hopefully, the neighbor isn't one of those people who purposefully gives animal products to vegans - she was told they're vegans and clearly disregarded it. Hmm.

    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not so sure that the neighbor "disregarded" being told the whole family is vegan as much as it's the child seeing the neighbor preparing a food with meat/animal product in it for her own grandson and says "That looks/smells good, may I have some?" OP is old enough to choose to be ethically vegan and that's fine, but her daughter is 6 and probably doesn't understand the ethical angle of it and just wants to eat what looks/smells/tastes good. I'm not saying it's proper for the neighbor to allow the daughter to consume meat if she knows OP/her mom wants her to eat only vegan, but that it may not be the neighbor forcing the issue at all. I know a 6-year-old is going to want to try something that looks or smells tasty.

    Load More Replies...
    tori Ohno
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she's feeding her own grandson and offering the little girl some food as well. It would be rude, and cruel, no to. If it bothers mom do much, tell Grandma to kick her daughter out of the house and go home when the boy eats. Which do you want, a heartbroken little girl, or one who gets a piece of trifle and a fish stick?

    Load More Comments
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