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Cats aren’t exactly the most loyal of creatures. Many can be quite fickle when it comes to who the flavor of the month, or day is. You can dote on them, buy them the most expensive toys, or feed them the best treats, and still get your feelings hurt when they cheat on you, and decide to wander off for what they see as the better deal.
One cat owner says they’ve poured their heart and soul into caring for their rescue cat. He’s high maintenance, expensive and has his “quirks,” which they’ve worked through together. All was going well until a new neighbor moved in upstairs. Suddenly, the cat started disappearing for days, coming home with unexplained wounds and has mysteriously picked up weight…
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When their cat started acting strange and spending days away from home, its owner started to investigate
Man holding a fluffy cat outside a white building, illustrating a cat disappearing for days and being adopted by a neighbor.
Here’s why some cats cheat on their doting human beings
Has Mr Whiskers been acting a little differently lately? ‘Working’ late, not coming home, a change in appearance/routine, or turning his nose up at your delicious dinners are all signs that he might have a side dish, so to speak…
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There are many reasons why your cat may be choosing a neighbor over you. One of the most common is food. “If someone else offers a food they prefer (or more of it), they might return there frequently,” explains the pet parenting site, Kinship. “A random neighbour won’t know about the special food you might give your cat for health reasons, or how expensive it is to purchase regularly. And your cat, as loving as they may be, probably won’t care. If it tastes better, and is available more regularly, it could be more appealing.”
Another reason they’re stepping out could be because of a change in routine or environment. Maybe you have a new addition to the family, are working different hours, or going through some sort of change at home. All of these things can ruffle a cat’s proverbial feathers, leading to them going in search of a place where they can find comfort and routine again.
Cat peeking out from under a blue cover near a tire, disappearing for days before the neighbor adopted him.
“Cats are inherently territorial animals and generally like to live in their familiar environment,” says Daniel Warren-Cummings, central behaviour officer for Cats Protection. “Many cats will, however, seek refuge elsewhere if there is a sudden change in their home environment or routine which causes them stress, for example new pets or family members, home renovations or even loud noises at home which force cats to seek calmer environments elsewhere.”
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The experts over at Kinship agree. They say that for some cats, even the most loving home may be stressful for them at times. “Noise, hustle and bustle, other pets, children, a new baby, a badly positioned food bowl — all these things can make cats uncomfortable, especially at mealtimes and so they may be drawn to an environment that they perceive as calmer and more comfortable for them,” explains the site.
This doesn’t mean your kitty no longer loves you. They’re just (rather selfishly) trying to get their needs met, maybe for food, attention or stimulation. Many will roam between houses but always return to you (at some point) for comfort and affection.
But be warned: if your home continues to be “problematic,” some cats may pack up and leave altogether when they find something that better suits their needs.
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“You probably shouldn’t have a cat”: people had lots to say and not everyone was kind
Comment about a cat disappearing for days and advice to keep the cat indoors or on a leash for safety.
Online comment discussing a cat disappearing for days while neighbor has been adopting the cat at their apartment
Alt text: Cat disappearing for days as neighbor secretly adopts him, owner shares advice on keeping cats safe indoors and entertained.
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Cat scratching at apartment door, showing signs of disappearing for days, hinting at neighbor’s secret adoption.
User comment about keeping an outdoor cat indoors to prevent it from disappearing and being adopted by a neighbor.
User comment about a cat disappearing for days and the risks of letting cats roam outside unattended.
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Comment discussing indoor/outdoor cat behavior and neighbors possibly adopting a cat that disappears for days.
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Comment criticizing a vet and suggesting anti-anxiety meds to calm a cat that keeps disappearing days.
Person’s cat disappearing for days as neighbor secretly adopts and feeds him, ignoring owner’s requests to stop.
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Text comment about outdoor cats and responsible pet ownership, discussing cats disappearing and neighbors adopting them.
Person’s cat disappearing for days, reveals neighbor secretly adopting and spending time with the cat safely outdoors.
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Reddit comment discussing the mystery of a person’s cat disappearing for days and neighbor adopting him.
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Comment on a community forum discussing a cat disappearing for days, suggesting the cat moves freely as it wants.
Comment about keeping a cat inside to prevent it from disappearing, emphasizing owner responsibility and enrichment needs.
Comment about keeping a cat indoors like a responsible owner in an online discussion about a cat disappearing for days.
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Comment on a forum about a cat that frequently goes missing, hinting at concerns about outdoor cats.
Comment about keeping a cat inside to prevent it from disappearing or being adopted by a neighbor’s family.
User comment suggesting using a catio or leash for a cat that starts disappearing, to allow safe exploration and playtime.
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Comment about a cat disappearing for days while the neighbor has been adopting the cat instead.
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Screenshot of an online comment saying the cat prefers the neighbor who has been ‘adopting’ him.
Comment suggesting using an AirTag on a cat’s collar to monitor its location when the neighbor is ‘adopting’ him.
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Comment about dangers of an outdoor cat and suggesting building a catio or leash training for safety and environment.
Comment discussing advice on keeping a cat inside and using an Air Tag to track it disappearing for days.
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Screenshot of a user comment discussing a cat disappearing for days and being adopted by neighbors.
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Allowing your cat to spend time or eat at a stranger’s home can be dangerous, here’s what to do about it
Besides your broken heart, there are a range of risks that come with your cat eating from, or visiting a stranger. Even if your pet isn’t on a special diet, this person could be feeding them something that isn’t particularly healthy or nutritious. Or worse yet, toxic, like onions, garlic or chocolate.
According to Cat Advocacy Programme Manager at International Cat Care, Linda Ryan, cats with diabetes or a kidney condition are particularly vulnerable… If a diabetic cat is dining out and getting extra food at the wrong time and place, they may not eat at home and the owner might end up not giving them insulin because they think they haven’t eaten.
Another issue with kitties eating outside of your home is that they get overfed and become obese. This, in turn, can lead to health issues like diabetes or joint problems.
There’s also the risk of your cat encountering hazards en route to their side dish. For example, crossing a busy road, encountering dogs or other animals.
If you suspect your beloved cat is being unfaithful, experts suggest getting a with a microchip cat flap or GPS cat tracker, to monitor how much time they’re spending away/where they’re going.
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If you know where they’re spending their time, ask your neighbour kindly to stop feeding your pet and explain why. Do this in person or slip a note under their door or on the cat’s collar.
“In practice, most people who feed other peoples’ cats do so in the well-meaning and honest belief that the cats are strays, have no owners and are hungry,” says Daniel Warren-Cummings. He says that from a legal point of view, cats are regarded as property but recent changes in Britain’s laws also now recognise their sentience.
“The removal or taking of a cat without authority or lawful excuse could be considered an offence under the new Pet Abduction Act 2024 (in England and Northern Ireland),” Warren-Cummings explains. You can check the laws in your own state or country but it’s best to first try and solve the issue amicably with your neighbor before going the legal route.
Another option is to install a cat boundary fencing if you have the space and are allowed/able to. “Common options are invert and overhang fences, which stop the cats from going over the top of your fence; they cannot bend their spines in a concave shape,” adds the Kinship site.
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You could also create a ‘catio,’ which is an enclosed space in your garden or yard that allows your cat to be outside without letting them roam free.
“Yet another strange injury”: in an update, the owner said they were getting more concerned
Woman in a striped sweater hugging her cat closely indoors, illustrating a cat disappearing for days and neighbor adopting him.
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Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."
Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."
I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.
I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.
so... op pretty much KNOWS where the cat is because the neighbour keeps stealing the cat, but rather than go get him they will just stomp around and complain about how annoying and hard it is for 2 days until the cat comes back?? alright. never seen such useless owners
No one owns a cat, they own you. We have a cat that decided to come and live in our street and spends his time going between three or four houses. He's not feral, he is domesticated, chipped and insured by one household but can be often be seen in another and fed at a third.
Where I live this would be very dangerous for the cat (predators, cars, etc.) For two of our cats we signed a contract that they were not going to be outdoor cats.
My two female cats don't even attempt to leave my fenced in yard, they are both scared of their own shadows and perfectly content not roaming. My male tuxedo I found years ago as an abandoned barn cat on the other hand, would spray inside my house if I didn't let him out and he roamed for weeks at a time. Not all cats are going to tolerate being locked inside.
so... op pretty much KNOWS where the cat is because the neighbour keeps stealing the cat, but rather than go get him they will just stomp around and complain about how annoying and hard it is for 2 days until the cat comes back?? alright. never seen such useless owners
No one owns a cat, they own you. We have a cat that decided to come and live in our street and spends his time going between three or four houses. He's not feral, he is domesticated, chipped and insured by one household but can be often be seen in another and fed at a third.
Where I live this would be very dangerous for the cat (predators, cars, etc.) For two of our cats we signed a contract that they were not going to be outdoor cats.
My two female cats don't even attempt to leave my fenced in yard, they are both scared of their own shadows and perfectly content not roaming. My male tuxedo I found years ago as an abandoned barn cat on the other hand, would spray inside my house if I didn't let him out and he roamed for weeks at a time. Not all cats are going to tolerate being locked inside.
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