Woman Assumes Roommate Will Take Care Of Her Cat While She’s Away, In Tears After He Says No Way
Roommates are mostly fun, but sharing a home always comes with its quirks. Some folks leave their dishes in the sink, others crank up the thermostat, and then there are those who assume you’ll become their cat’s personal butler when they are away.
Suddenly, your chill living situation turns into a test of patience, cat cuddling skills, and how much fur you can tolerate. That’s exactly what happened to one Redditor who was forced to watch his roommate’s cat for 3 weeks while she was on vacation. And he wasn’t happy about it.
More info: Reddit
Some roommates leave dishes in the sink, others leave you questioning your entire life choices by week two
Image credits: Adam Kuylenstierna / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
One man refuses to be an unpaid cat sitter when his roommate decides shared living means “shared cat custody”
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The man doesn’t like cats but his roommate loves them, so after a lot of back and forth, he agrees to allow her to get one
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Before leaving for a 3-week vacation, the roommate gives cat-care instructions to the man, assuming he will take care of her pet
Image credits: Parianusti
The man refuses to watch his roommate’s cat for 3 weeks, especially since she never asked him—just told him to
The OP’s (original poster) roommate is a true cat enthusiast. If she had her way, the apartment would probably be a mini cattery. But the OP is not a big fan of these sassy furballs, which is why he never wanted one in the house. Still, after endless pleas from his roomie, he finally gave in and allowed her to get a cat, which came with the unspoken deal that it was her pet only, not shared custody
But apparently, the roommate wasn’t in on the rule. A week before leaving for a long holiday, she casually mentioned the trip to the OP. Nothing alarming there. However, the day before she was set to leave, she sat him down and started giving him detailed cat-care instructions: food preferences, litter schedules, even the vet’s number.
The OP, totally baffled, stopped her mid-tutorial. That’s when it hit him: his roommate never asked, she just assumed he’d handle the cat like some kind of live-in sitter. And when he said no, her world practically collapsed. Tears, panic, bargaining, you name it. The OP’s roomie just assumed he would be fine with scooping poop and cuddling a needy feline at midnight.
But the OP didn’t sign up to be a cat dad. So, he suggested his roommate find a pet hotel. Her reaction? Immediate horror. Too expensive, too last-minute, and apparently not an option. So, the OP was stuck in a moral pickle. On one side, he didn’t want to deal with litter boxes and late-night mewing. On the other, his buddies kept telling him to just do it that one time.
Image credits: Blake Cheek / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But to OP, this felt less about cats and more about boundaries. Because getting along with your roommate isn’t rocket science—it’s mostly rules, honesty, and some compromise. First off, talk it out: discuss chores, guests, noise, and all the little quirks that could annoy someone, and yes, even the weird sock piles.
Split responsibilities fairly, especially when pets are involved. Look, if you’ve got a pet, you feed it, end of story. Don’t hand over the litter box cleaning schedule like it’s a team sport. Be empathetic and flexible, address conflicts early before they turn into epic grudges, and always respect each other’s boundaries.
But sometimes, even with rules and talks, roommates use manipulation and pull the guilt card that makes boundaries feel impossible. Emotional manipulation is basically when someone uses feelings as a tool to get what they want. Think guilt trips, waterworks at suspiciously convenient times, or dramatic panic that turns small issues into crises.
It usually happens because the person doesn’t want to face responsibility, or they’ve learned that turning up the drama makes others cave. The trick is spotting it: are you being asked, or are you being pressured? If it feels less like a favor and more like a hostage negotiation with tears, that’s manipulation. Because if you wanted midnight meowing, and fur on your clothes, you’ d just get your own cat.
What do you think of this story? Would you take care of someone else’s pet for 3 weeks? Share your thoughts and comments below!
Netizens side with the man, saying he is not a jerk in this story as his roommate shouldn’t have assumed he would care for her cat
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Explore more of these tags
I would never ASSUME my h/m would watch my cat - and especially for 3 weeks. You ask way ahead of time and you accept that no is a reasonable answer and make other plans.
I would never even leave my baby for more than a week! And I always plan waaaay ahead who will take care of her. and have backup options too.
Load More Replies...I have two points to make here. First, the YTA and ESH replies above are delusional. Maybe they are the kind of people who would go on vacation and just expect their roommate to take care of their cat? Second, OP said his girlfriend and friends were saying he should just take care of the cat. Maybe they would volunteer to do it (sarcasm).
Well, at least the roommate LIVES with the cat, I had situation where someone assumed I will go by bus after my work to another part of the town every day for 3-4 weeks to feed their cat! And I booked my 7 days vacation in same period and they were like "well, cancel it, we need you". They never asked just booked it months before and casually mentioned it few weeks before leaving. They booked 3 weeks, it's now 4th still not back, I have no ide if poor cat is even alive. They no longer talk to me. I have no keys to check, so I guess I am a bad person now who possibly "caused" a death of their pet. God forbid it's their fault!
Load More Replies...I wouldn't assume I could leave a pet for THREE WEEKS with someone I was f*****g, let alone a (presumably) platonic roommate. Sorry, that's just an insane, entitled, or both assumption.
Sounds like the main issue is the presumption on the roommate's part and not that OP WOULDN'T take care of the cat. Seems pretty entitled to just assume anyone would take care of the cat, regardless of who it is. If I had a partner, I wouldn't assume they would just take care of Benny nor would I even probably ask. If they offered, sure. But my Benny, my responsibility.
Here's a thought that the YTA and the ESH bunch didn't address, what if the dude is allergic to the "gifts" in the litter box? I'm OK around cats if I am around them from kittens, but the litter box thing has me running for my inhaler. It's just not doable. What if the OP has a similar reaction to cleaning out the box? Three weeks is a lot of litter to be dumping in the trash, especially the designer type litters out there now.
He's not. He wrote several times that he could easily take care of the cat, he just doesn't want to.
Load More Replies...I'd never assume any friends/family will take care of my cat while I'm away. I ALWAYS arrange for a pet sitter. I'd never agree. I love cats, but I hate irresponsible cat owner more. I'd leave before her, making it clear that I'll be gone the whole time and I'd hold her responsible if any of my possession is damaged.
Good you said no. She would have assumed you would do it again. It’s her pet. She’s responsible. Not spring it on her roommmate last minute a look baffled when told no. A week maybe but a month? No. She could have also asked the vet to board the cat instead of a pet hotel. And this thing has the run of the house but has to sleep with her? It’s going to go into a meltdown. I have 4 cats. I have a few people I ask way ahead of time to pet sit if needed and I’ve done it myself for family. She needs a reality check.
Do it this time but charge 50% of what boarding would cost; next time, it's the same charge; the next time, it's 50% more that the boarding fee. Never make assumptions.
From the comments this guy seems to dislike cats so this solution wouldn't work, but I'd say if you end up watching the cat, make sure by the end of her vacation the cat likes you more than her.
even if he loves cats, he is still in the right to tell the roommate to eff off. I love cats, and if someone just "assumed" i had to work for them 3 weeks cause they felt like having a holiday and weren't even arsed to ask if I would take care of the cat, I would laugh at their face, and then get animal control if they left the cat anyways
Load More Replies...I had similar situation with my sister who assumed I will go to her home every day or so, for her 3 weeks vacation. We live on different parts of city and it takes me a bus ride and some walks to get there and back and it's no picnic and it costs me. Taking care of cat is fine but getting there is a chore. I did that for free previous few years and they would always stay longer, at least 3 or 4 weeks and ignored me saying it was really hard for me to get there every day on scorching sun and heat! And they did not leave enough food for cat so I had to buy it. This year, they just booked 3 weeks (4th week they are still not back) and assumed I will AGAIN go there every day to feed the poor cat, they didn't even ask me! I gave them several great options to pay people to take care of their cat as I also planned my vacation during that same period but they refused to pay. Poor cat is alone on automatic feeder for almost 4 weeks! If she is alive. I have no keys so I can not check. :(
Because they aren’t cat lovers, simple as that. Not his responsibility that his roommate is a poor planner.
Load More Replies...If you were my roommate I would never babysit your cat. That is your responsibility, pay for a cat hotel.
Load More Replies...I would never ASSUME my h/m would watch my cat - and especially for 3 weeks. You ask way ahead of time and you accept that no is a reasonable answer and make other plans.
I would never even leave my baby for more than a week! And I always plan waaaay ahead who will take care of her. and have backup options too.
Load More Replies...I have two points to make here. First, the YTA and ESH replies above are delusional. Maybe they are the kind of people who would go on vacation and just expect their roommate to take care of their cat? Second, OP said his girlfriend and friends were saying he should just take care of the cat. Maybe they would volunteer to do it (sarcasm).
Well, at least the roommate LIVES with the cat, I had situation where someone assumed I will go by bus after my work to another part of the town every day for 3-4 weeks to feed their cat! And I booked my 7 days vacation in same period and they were like "well, cancel it, we need you". They never asked just booked it months before and casually mentioned it few weeks before leaving. They booked 3 weeks, it's now 4th still not back, I have no ide if poor cat is even alive. They no longer talk to me. I have no keys to check, so I guess I am a bad person now who possibly "caused" a death of their pet. God forbid it's their fault!
Load More Replies...I wouldn't assume I could leave a pet for THREE WEEKS with someone I was f*****g, let alone a (presumably) platonic roommate. Sorry, that's just an insane, entitled, or both assumption.
Sounds like the main issue is the presumption on the roommate's part and not that OP WOULDN'T take care of the cat. Seems pretty entitled to just assume anyone would take care of the cat, regardless of who it is. If I had a partner, I wouldn't assume they would just take care of Benny nor would I even probably ask. If they offered, sure. But my Benny, my responsibility.
Here's a thought that the YTA and the ESH bunch didn't address, what if the dude is allergic to the "gifts" in the litter box? I'm OK around cats if I am around them from kittens, but the litter box thing has me running for my inhaler. It's just not doable. What if the OP has a similar reaction to cleaning out the box? Three weeks is a lot of litter to be dumping in the trash, especially the designer type litters out there now.
He's not. He wrote several times that he could easily take care of the cat, he just doesn't want to.
Load More Replies...I'd never assume any friends/family will take care of my cat while I'm away. I ALWAYS arrange for a pet sitter. I'd never agree. I love cats, but I hate irresponsible cat owner more. I'd leave before her, making it clear that I'll be gone the whole time and I'd hold her responsible if any of my possession is damaged.
Good you said no. She would have assumed you would do it again. It’s her pet. She’s responsible. Not spring it on her roommmate last minute a look baffled when told no. A week maybe but a month? No. She could have also asked the vet to board the cat instead of a pet hotel. And this thing has the run of the house but has to sleep with her? It’s going to go into a meltdown. I have 4 cats. I have a few people I ask way ahead of time to pet sit if needed and I’ve done it myself for family. She needs a reality check.
Do it this time but charge 50% of what boarding would cost; next time, it's the same charge; the next time, it's 50% more that the boarding fee. Never make assumptions.
From the comments this guy seems to dislike cats so this solution wouldn't work, but I'd say if you end up watching the cat, make sure by the end of her vacation the cat likes you more than her.
even if he loves cats, he is still in the right to tell the roommate to eff off. I love cats, and if someone just "assumed" i had to work for them 3 weeks cause they felt like having a holiday and weren't even arsed to ask if I would take care of the cat, I would laugh at their face, and then get animal control if they left the cat anyways
Load More Replies...I had similar situation with my sister who assumed I will go to her home every day or so, for her 3 weeks vacation. We live on different parts of city and it takes me a bus ride and some walks to get there and back and it's no picnic and it costs me. Taking care of cat is fine but getting there is a chore. I did that for free previous few years and they would always stay longer, at least 3 or 4 weeks and ignored me saying it was really hard for me to get there every day on scorching sun and heat! And they did not leave enough food for cat so I had to buy it. This year, they just booked 3 weeks (4th week they are still not back) and assumed I will AGAIN go there every day to feed the poor cat, they didn't even ask me! I gave them several great options to pay people to take care of their cat as I also planned my vacation during that same period but they refused to pay. Poor cat is alone on automatic feeder for almost 4 weeks! If she is alive. I have no keys so I can not check. :(
Because they aren’t cat lovers, simple as that. Not his responsibility that his roommate is a poor planner.
Load More Replies...If you were my roommate I would never babysit your cat. That is your responsibility, pay for a cat hotel.
Load More Replies...


































37
31