Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

“Am I Going Insane?”: Guy Comes Back Early From Work Trip To See His Home In Chaos
Man with shocked expression coming back early from work trip, seeing his home in chaos and disbelief.
115

“Am I Going Insane?”: Guy Comes Back Early From Work Trip To See His Home In Chaos

Interview With Expert
ADVERTISEMENT

There’s nothing like returning home after a work trip. The relief you feel knowing that you’re finally going to cook in your own kitchen, shower in your own bathroom and sleep in your own bed is indescribable. 

So when one man entered his apartment after a work trip got cut short, he was expecting to find peace and quiet. Instead, however, he was greeted by a huge mess and his girlfriend’s family. Below, you’ll find the full story that he recently shared on Reddit, as well as a conversation with relationship expert and President of Couples Therapy Inc., Kathy McMahon, PsyD.

RELATED:

    This man gave his girlfriend a key to his apartment because he trusted her

    Image credits: Prostock-studio/Envato (not the actual photo)

    But he never expected to find her family crashing at his place after returning home from a work trip

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: marevgenna1985/Envato (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Elratum

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Deciding to share your home with your partner is a big step

    Image credits: Sigmund/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Knowing when to present your partner with a key to your place isn’t always easy. You don’t want to scare them off by showing up with it on the second date, but if you’ve been dating for years and they’re still not allowed into your home, that might create tension too.

    According to a survey from YouGov, the majority of people believe that it’s appropriate to move in with a partner after dating for one year or less. And a quarter of men think only six months is enough time for a couple to decide to share their own place. 

    But, of course, there are risks to giving your partner a key, or deciding to share an apartment together, too soon. If the relationship is too fresh, the couple may not have built the communication skills necessary to have difficult conversations about small annoyances. 

    It’s inevitable for couples to have disagreements over things like how to wash the dishes or how to fold the towels. But it’s a lot easier to work through these minor conflicts when you’ve been together for a longer period of time. 

    To learn more about this particular situation from a relationship expert, we got in touch with Kathy McMahon, PsyD, President of Couples Therapy Inc. She was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and share her perspective on this story.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    “It is easy to get all mixed up in the details of this story; the destruction of property, invading personal belongings to hook up a PS2, theft of prescription medication, but let’s slow down,” Dr. McMahon shared.

    “The fact that she doesn’t see anything wrong with this is not a red flag, it’s a flag on fire”

    Image credits: A. C./Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    “His girlfriend could have asked him if her family could stay at his house while he was out of town. She could have told him before he left, so he could have prepared for strangers inhabiting his apartment, if he wanted to say yes. She didn’t,” the expert noted. “Full stop. End of story.”

    Dr. McMahon says that that’s a horrible betrayal. “Everything else that came after it certainly made it worse,” she noted. “He wasn’t his best self during the ‘discovery’ and outrage. Nevertheless, that’s not the thing to focus on.”

    ADVERTISEMENT

    The expert says that the real issue here is between the author and his girlfriend. “Not sure how someone comes to think that inviting a family from out of town to live in someone else’s apartment for a vacation is okay,” Dr. McMahon shared. “Perhaps it is cultural. But whatever the reason, the fact that she doesn’t see anything wrong with this is not a red flag, it’s a flag on fire.”

    The therapist also noted that there are some boundaries that shouldn’t have to be spelled out in relationships. “Like ‘It’s not okay to sleep with my sister.’ This doesn’t rise to quite that level, but it’s close, especially if they continue to argue about it. Yes, he is being gaslighted. And maybe exploited.”

    Finally, we asked Dr. McMahon if it’s possible to re-establish boundaries to keep the relationship alive after an experience like this. “I suppose,” she says. “But I wouldn’t want to have to police my intimate partner and dream up what else she might think is okay to do.”

    Readers immediately took the man’s side, and he chimed in to share more details about the situation

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Many assured the author that he had every right to kick the family out

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    However, a small minority thought that the man had overreacted

    ADVERTISEMENT
    Ic_polls

    Poll Question

    Thanks! Check out the results:

    Share on Facebook
    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Read less »
    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Ilona Baliūnaitė

    Ilona Baliūnaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

    Read less »

    Ilona Baliūnaitė

    Ilona Baliūnaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

    Jonas Zvilius

    Jonas Zvilius

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    In my spare time, I enjoy creating art - both in traditional and digital form, mainly in the form of painting and animation. Other interests include gaming and music. Favorite bands include Swans, The Strokes, The Beatles.

    Read less »

    Jonas Zvilius

    Jonas Zvilius

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    In my spare time, I enjoy creating art - both in traditional and digital form, mainly in the form of painting and animation. Other interests include gaming and music. Favorite bands include Swans, The Strokes, The Beatles.

    What do you think ?
    User avatar
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Scott Rackley
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have went apeshit over this. My place is my sanctuary, and I have hobbies that cost a whole lot.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂😂😂🤷‍♀️brilliant lol I’m packing now anyone know their addys lol 😂

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Scott Rackley
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have went apeshit over this. My place is my sanctuary, and I have hobbies that cost a whole lot.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂😂😂🤷‍♀️brilliant lol I’m packing now anyone know their addys lol 😂

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Popular on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda
    ADVERTISEMENT