In-Laws Secretly Book Themselves Onto The Couple’s Honeymoon, Husband’s Response Has The Internet Cheering
Your honeymoon is meant to be magical. You’re deeply in love with your soulmate, you can’t keep your hands off each other, and you want to focus on your flourishing relationship. So, it can be weird and disheartening when your relatives want to join your trip! This is why defending your boundaries is so essential.
The ‘JUSTNOMIL’ online community was utterly shocked when they read one woman’s story about how her in-laws suddenly bought tickets to join their honeymoon at Disney World. Confused and annoyed, the happy couple decided that this went way too far. Keep scrolling for the full story and update.
Newlyweds going on their honeymoon want it to be romantic, enjoyable, and, most likely, private
Image credits: projectUA (not the actual photo)
However, this woman’s in-laws suddenly decided that they’d be joining the couple’s honeymoon trip to Disney World, which wasn’t received well
Image credits: dvatri (not the actual photo)
Image source: QuitePolly
Someone who respects your boundaries shows that they care about you. The opposite is also true
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
We’re very big fans of healthy boundaries. They’re absolutely vital in all of your relationships: romantic, familial, professional, platonic, etc.
It’s your ability to communicate your boundaries, and then enforce them when needed, that protects your needs. It also sets very clear expectations for how you expect others to be treated, what behavior you find inappropriate, and that you won’t accept being disrespected.
Now, to be clear, not everyone is intentionally malicious (though you do see some overly entitled folks here and there). Some people are a bit clueless, so they lack the self-awareness to realize that they’ve crossed the line.
This is why it’s so important to have transparency when it comes to your boundaries. If they stay invisible, others might not realize that they’ve wronged you. So, protecting your needs is only half of the puzzle. The other half is to set out those clear expectations so that everyone’s on the same page in the future. If that latter part is missing, you’re hoping that things will get better on their own. But not everyone will get the subtle message.
Setting out your boundaries and arguing with someone can be emotionally messy and awkward. Especially if they’re a member of your family. However, not all conflict is unhealthy. If you stay calm, cool, and collected, and approach the argument from a position of mutual respect, you can’t go wrong.
While it’s understandable that the happy couple rebooked their honeymoon tickets to avoid going to Disney World with their in-laws, this is still just a temporary solution. The main problem, namely, the in-laws (un)intentionally disrespecting their boundaries, will continue being an issue.
The mature (and, frankly, more difficult) thing to do would be to sit down with the in-laws and explain to them that they’ve crossed the line, how this makes you feel, and what you expect to happen going forward.
On top of that, you can outline some simple consequences if your needs continue to be sidelined. For instance, you could note that you may have to spend a bit less time together. Or that you’ll take part in fewer family events.
The goal is to communicate very openly and honestly without resorting to anger, massive criticism, and emotional escalation. Even if you’re completely in the right, if you start throwing (accurate) accusations around, the people ignoring your boundaries might get defensive, and you’ll get nowhere. A more diplomatic approach is usually best at the start.
You can be open to suggestions and compromises, but some things are non-negotiable, and your in-laws need to accept this
Image credits: Dannielle Zand’te Miranda (not the actual photo)
As CNA Lifestyle stresses, boundaries are like habits in that they take time to establish. “You may need to repeat the words or action until it becomes second nature. If you find yourself frustrated or guilty for saying no to your in-laws, don’t be. Establishing boundaries leads to healthy mindsets and overall well-being.”
So, consistency is key here. Your in-laws might forget about your boundaries, so you have to reassert them.
That being said, keep the communication lines open. You can also look for compromises in situations where they make sense. But don’t feel like absolutely every boundary is negotiable. It’s not. You have to know where to stand your ground.
“Your in-laws may wish to discuss options for certain issues, and this is helpful to the relationship in general. Finding middle ground is one healthy way of setting boundaries. Being open and offering compromises in your boundaries shows that you value your relationship with them and the harmony of your family unit,” CNA Lifestyle writes.
Meanwhile, Verywell Mind notes that you can build a healthier relationship with your in-laws by establishing boundaries, avoiding certain sensitive topics, and trying not to take things overly personally.
What’s more, it can help you to accept your in-laws as they are, being grateful for those moments that are genuinely good, and spending more time together to better understand them.
“It can be difficult to spend time with your in-laws if you don’t particularly enjoy their company. But if you can find activities that you both enjoy, it can help build a stronger bond between you. This could be anything from going for walks to playing cards to watching a movie together,” Verywell Mind suggests.
If your in-laws are particularly difficult to be around, then spend smaller chunks of time with them, instead of being around them for extended periods of time.
How would you react if someone from your or your partner’s family decided to join your honeymoon? What do you do to protect your boundaries from your in-laws? Where did you go for your own honeymoon? You can share your insights and experiences in the comments.
Many readers wanted to share their perspectives on the bizarre situation
Some folks even shared similar experiences of their own
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
Later, the woman had an update about the tense situation with her in-laws
And here’s how the net reacted when they read the follow-up post
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happened to me, got to the hotel and my mum in law, step dad in law and younger brother in law were in the pool at out hotel. absolutely true! luckily I love my mum in law, my husband was really cross
How were they for the rest of the marriage? My honeymoon was a trip to six countries in Europe, and im trying to imagine my in-laws keeping up with us. Thank cow they were polite and respectful people (and also kinda racist and not thrilled their son had married a white girl) and left us to our own devices. These “My in-laws came on our honeymoon” posts freak me out!
Load More Replies...My ex mother in law tried this. Her logic was that because our honeymoon was a few years after the wedding (we were poor students, we needed to save up) it didn't count as a honeymoon. Nope
Load More Replies...happened to me, got to the hotel and my mum in law, step dad in law and younger brother in law were in the pool at out hotel. absolutely true! luckily I love my mum in law, my husband was really cross
How were they for the rest of the marriage? My honeymoon was a trip to six countries in Europe, and im trying to imagine my in-laws keeping up with us. Thank cow they were polite and respectful people (and also kinda racist and not thrilled their son had married a white girl) and left us to our own devices. These “My in-laws came on our honeymoon” posts freak me out!
Load More Replies...My ex mother in law tried this. Her logic was that because our honeymoon was a few years after the wedding (we were poor students, we needed to save up) it didn't count as a honeymoon. Nope
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