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35submissions
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Hey Pandas, You Have 60 Seconds To Ruin A First Date — What Do You Say?
We all know first dates can be awkward… but what’s the fastest way to completely ruin one? You’ve got 60 seconds—what do you say to make it go downhill instantly?
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#1
I've learned so much from Andrew Tate.
Final score:
23points
WindySwede 1 month ago
I guss you also can learn from bad examples as well? But most already know about not to endorse trafficking etc from the start?
RELATED:
#2
"Do you have a minute to talk about our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ?"
Nope, I don't. My coven demands immediate attention 😂
Final score:
21points
#3
If you hear a consistent beeping, don't worry, it's just my ankle monitor battery running low...
Final score:
18points
#4
"So just you know, I have been drinking nothing but pineapple juice the whole week prior to this day."
Final score:
16points
#5
Does this rag smell of chloroform?
Final score:
15points
#6
May I introduce you to my mum? She's here, on the table next to us.... Hi Mom!
Final score:
14points
#7
I have a great joke, you'll laugh so hard your t**s will fall off. Oh, I see you've already heard it
Final score:
13points
#8
I think you're my new soulmate
Final score:
13points
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 1 month ago
I think you are my old soulmate returned from the dead, reincarnated after all these centuries.
Frances Pitchoune 1 month ago
Iiiiish! I already hear that! RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!
Load More Replies... #9
*Keeps looking over dates shoulder*
MOM! Slow down with the cue cards. You're flipping them too fast!
Final score:
13points
#10
If I'm the one with the date:
Do you believe in the flying spaghetti monster?
If I'm a spectator:
"Hey man, I thought you were dating Laura?"
Final score:
12points
KatSaidWhat 1 month ago
I performed marriage rites in the eyes of his holy noodliness...
Load More Replies... #11
I’m a believer in our lord and saviour and the gospel.
If we have Daughters I’d just like to point out I’m a big fan of the names Moab and Ammon for their kids!
Final score:
11points
#12
Quick, get in the van!
Final score:
11points
KatSaidWhat (Submission author) 1 month ago
A friend said this one night when we were talking about worst opening lines and I never forgot it - c*****d up laughing so much.
Load More Replies...
#13
Once again, I have to take my four exes to court over child support.
Final score:
10points
#14
My mentor is looking for sharp, ambitious people to expand their e-commerce business.
Final score:
10points
#15
I am such a nice guy, shall I impregnate you now or after dessert?
Final score:
9points
WindySwede 1 month ago
I think the answer to that is *desert*. (not spelling thing, but a reference to the dry place)
#16
my last girlfriend had that dress and it looked much better on her .
Final score:
9points
#17
*starts rhyming violently*
that's how I would ruin it
Final score:
8points
LinkTheHylian 1 month ago
Little Miss MUFFET sat on her TUFFET eating her curds and WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! *headbangs*
The unnamed one (Submission author) 1 month ago
or I would just speak in Japanese. 九条のロープ、偏光、カラスと宣言、前面と背面の間。想像上の技法：ホロウパープル
#18
So I was checking out your Facebook and your daughter is hot! 9th grade now, right?... Ok. I grossed myself out.🤢🤮
Final score:
8points
#19
MAGA
Final score:
7points
#20
"Wow, you look like you work out. Have you considered adding Herbalife to your regimen?" *starts taking bottles and pamphlets out of my purse*
Final score:
5points
#21
Sorry , my ride's here (as uniformed police enter), can we try again in a year or two?
Final score:
5points
#22
I'm a mum of five
Final score:
5points
#24
"Just to get it out of the way up front. The doctor says I'm responding well to treatment and I'm no longer contagious"
Final score:
4points
#26
So-are you a virgin? Do you have any scars? Great! I have a close group of friends who will LOVE meeting you!
Final score:
2points
#29
If you like true crime, you'll love the rest of the evening!
Final score:
1point
#31
Being unemployed for 5 years and living with my parents, doesn't mean I can't still find the love of my life!
Final score:
1point
#32
Wow, I'm having such a great time! Do you think dinner will run past 9:30?
If so, I need to call my mom to let her know I'll be late coming home.
Final score:
1point
#33
I didn't ask you to pay my bill, I asked you to pay my bail.
Final score:
0points
#34
"Excuse me, ma'am. Do you enjoy c*********s?".
Final score:
0points
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What do you think ?
Smeghead Tribble Down Under 1 month ago
Any one of these would make me up and leave without another word: I hate cats/I love Donald Trump/the earth is flat/I hate Star Trek/I want kids/I have kids.
Smeghead Tribble Down Under 1 month ago
Any one of these would make me up and leave without another word: I hate cats/I love Donald Trump/the earth is flat/I hate Star Trek/I want kids/I have kids.
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