this is a safe space. personally, when i'm upset (like right now for example) i need someone to rant to. my parents are a no because they're usually the people that upset me. and they took away my phone 6 months ago so i cant text anyone. even if i could text someone my parents would read it cause they read all my texts. so yeah your ranting is safe here.

#1

i am about to f*cking scream. my parents act like i'm SO disrespectful to them and i may very well be but it's cause they don't treat me with respect half the time. the other half of the time i'm this daughter who they expect everything of even when i'm sick. and they pay attention to everything about me that i hate. i've told my dad i don't like being touched unless i initiate it, but he still touches my shoulder or my hand and i pull away and he acts all offended. and then he tells me my hair or my makeup looks good and i don't like being talked about in the way i look, cause yk, i hate myself. then my parents make me feel so guilty.

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Cypress
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I relate to this. I’m so sorry, it’s not fun to feel disrespected.

Bisexual Axolotls
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That sucks, parents seem to expect you to be a perfect adult but then they treat you like a child. I'm sorry.

Blue Strawberry
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same. It’s ok. You’re not alone.

RELATED:
    #2

    I don't really have a family, my friends were my family. Since I am an introvert I just have few close friends. Unfortunately in last few years they have got busy with their lives (married, boyfriend, new friends). It's not that we don't keep in touch but it's not like it was before. I thought let's try to make new friends but who who wants to be a friend with a quiet introvert right... With my friends l never felt I was an boring introvert(normal/happy days). I feel it's my fault that my friends are drifting away. Now I am feeling the effects- anxiety attacks, depression, self loathing & social anxiety. I spoke to my friends about it but they can only help as much as they can & I don't want to burden them with my problems any more. Just not able to figure out how to fix myself or find a solution

    Report

    Chris Osborn
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm also an introvert with very few friends. I'm lucky that I have family that's close, physically and emotionally. I know that it's really difficult to make new friends, especially as you get older. I wish I would have stayed in contact with friends that used to have but I didn't. Don't pass up the opportunity to maintain the friendships that you have, even if they have changed, and also take care of yourself. Like bellajustchill said, Please see someone and talk to someone to help you. You're not a burden.

    #3

    I have a -1 Bored Panda score and I have no idea why. I've never posted anything and just add to the likes. Why, Bored Panda, why??

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    #4

    Sometimes I feel like there are so many things wrong with me but I don't know what's wrong and I don't know why I feel like that. I try to suppress those feelings because I'm probably just seeking attention and I hate myself for it.

    Report

    Lil Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really really relate to this.

    ThatOnePortobelloMushroom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OH MY GOD SAME. I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHINGS WRONG WITH ME BUT WHEN PEOPLE ASK FOR AN EXAMPLE I CANT THINK OF ONE AND THEN I FEEL GUILTY FOR TRYING TO GET ATTENTION FOR IT EVEN THOUGH IM NOT BUT I AM AND I CANT

    #5

    long story short i had a horrible day today. one of my “friends” is trying to control my life, i hate myself and i feel like dying, i haven’t drank any water in the past few days, my parents think they know me when they don’t, my coach is horrible and has caused multiple anxiety attacks from me on the court, and i just can’t take it anymore. i was sitting outside my sixth period for almost an hour today just crying. it’s getting to be too much.

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    BeepBeepBoopBoop
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hey, I completely understand what you're feeling. I literally had this happen to me like three years ago when I could still play sports. But please drink something. <3

    cah
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sorry you're having trouble. Please talk to someone if you need help. Take care of yourself! :)

    ThatOnePortobelloMushroom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel like you need a change in life. Like when you can (just think about it), you should move somewhere or find somewhere where you can start over, yaknow?

    #6

    I can’t shut the door to my bedroom or even *lock* the bathroom door! I hate my parents sometimes.

    Report

    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, when I’m getting dresssed and stuff I can shut the door they just like to have CONSTANT surveillance on me

    Froggie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh my f*cking god. I can’t even think of a word to describe their parents, and I’m an avid writer.

    #7

    My mum thinks that everything a kid does HAS to be educational, make them exercise, shape their future, etc. She just thinks that children don't have a life until they turn 18 and they have to prepare for their future in their childhood. Can't enjoy a single thing. She tells me to never read a book twice. Why? Because I won't find any new words or learn something new. She tells me to play a game which involves running rather than something like hide and seek. Why? Because running would make me fit. She tells me to not watch useless movies unless they're educational. Why? Because movies are a waste of time. She says that a person can enjoy their life once they're middle aged. It's annoying, really. I convinced her to let me read/watch Harry Potter, Marvel, DC and anime and manga only by convincing her that watching these would improve my knowledge of different countries. So basically, never do something unless it would help in your future

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    Cypress
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh dude, your mom would hate me… I’m sorry you are stuck with this.

    Legend
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How the hell are you supposed to enjoy your life in middle-age when half of it is already gone? I'm sorry you have to live like this.

    Horst
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The book rule is so stupid! I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve read The Wreckers or Inside Out and Back Again! You could always tell her the first time you read a book is for the story, the second is for vocabulary, etc. Idk. Sorry you have to live like this

    ThatOnePortobelloMushroom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Slithery snake, you are putting up with something intense. I'm really really really impressed that you're surviving everyday, my fragile a*s could never

    #8

    I’m just ready to f*cking jump off a cliff at this point, the toxicity and negativity piled on top of my mental illnesses is getting to be a bit much.

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    crowspectre (he/they)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bruh same. That suck tho, I'm sorrym.i hope you get through this

    Bisexual Axolotls
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please don't jump off a cliff, there's people out there who can help you. I would suggest talking to your school social worker/psychologist/counselor, or another trusted adult and seeing if they can help. Plus, cliffs are difficult to source if you live in a flatter place /j

    #9

    Over the past week, my mental health has been dropping again. Yesterday I had an anxiety attack and was dead sure that I was about to die for around 30 minutes- I actually opened a Google document and wrote what I wanted to be my last words. I think I'm feeling a bit better now but I know I'm not at 100%, and I'm worried that things are going to keep going downhill. I've been thinking a lot about my own existence and im torn between thinking that I could change the world and knowing that I'm no one in the end. I'm the classic 'other people' in others lives- I'm not memorable, I'm basically a living stereotype, and altogether I'm just a background piece of others' lives. Nothing about me is unique or noticeable and I'm more an amalgamation of the side characters in other people's stories than a person in my own right. It's not something that should worry me- someone has to be no one, but I wish it wasn't me. Even my dreams are mundane and regular. In the grand scheme of things, my life will mean nothing to anyone, including myself. I realize this is probably too long but you did ask for me to rant

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    Lil Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can tell you, you are not just a stereotype. You are a great person and you got this. You have got your whole life ahead of you, never give up, we're here for you. As for the anxiety attack, I had a panic attack in the middle of a crowded lecture hall and was one of the most miserable experiences of my life. I hope you are okay though, keep pushing through

    Lil Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    About the attacks- I get them all the time, am quite good at hiding them now. I would like to use myself as an example of what not to do- PLEASE tell someone if you have one- anyone. if its in person, call or text doesn't matter, please tell someone. if you don't it will build up and build up and lead to another and another.

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    Ashen Brooks (They/Them)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate panic attacks, I get them during my hypomanic and depressive episodes, and I always feel like either I'm dying or I'm about to. and my parents dont even know I have them, only friends, so at home I have to cope by myself and all I can do is either go under my bed which only fits half of my body or if we're in public I have to hide in a bathroom stall....

    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I rarely get panic attacks (although I just got one around 15 minutes ago lol that sucked), usually just anxiety attacks where I end up spiraling into my own fears for over an hour. It usually feels like only 5 minutes, which is kinda creepy. Mine usually start with me thinking I'm about to die and then my anxiety hitting and f*****g my brain up for a while. I don't have much advice for you, unfortunately, since I don't get panic attacks often. If you ever get anxiety attacks, my big advice is to go and drink a glass of water and start eating snacks/ listening to music. It's distracting while still allowing you to deal with your thoughts so they hopefully won't resurface later. I hope that doesn't come in handy, but it's better to know it and not need it than to need it and not know it

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    beethebi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's not too long, you can always rant as long as you want. honestly this probably won't help you, but i feel the same way.

    ThatOnePortobelloMushroom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just want to say, in your head you might think you're a stereotype, but even basic and generic people (somethin you are NOT) have something that makes them unique!! I know this is probably one of those pep talks where the person says something but you don't actually believe it, but I really want you to know that no two people are the same. I really hope you can get through this, and I really recommend find a therapist (or not, if you already have one) or maybe a helpline?I know there a crisis number you can text and talk to if you don't want to call anyone.

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    #10

    This is something I haven't talked about before but it sits with me and comes back at night. I had my first anxiety or panic attack (I haven't quite figured out the difference so if someone could explain it in more detail that'd be wonderful), at my boyfriend's house. I was absolutely freaking out and it felt like the whole room was closing in and that I was going to die by being crushed by it. He didn't understand. I told my mom about it later that night. She sorta looked at me weird and said "are you sure? ' in a condescending tone. It really upset me and I can't tell her that. Fast forward to now, I'm getting treatment for anxiety and depression. Both of these are a huge weight on my shoulders that my mom also seems to not understand. It's frustrating!

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    Sundreamer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had my first panic attack a few months ago. One morning I was sitting in the drive thru waiting to pick up my coffee when all of a sudden my chest got tight. I had trouble breathing. I thought I was having a heart attack and was literally about to call 911. I tried to breathe thru it and eventually the episode subsided. When talking to my therapist a few days later I called it an anxiety attack and my therapist told me it was a panic attack. I thought they were pretty much interchangeable, but she explained it to me in a way I understood it. The two are different like mad is different than furious, happy is different than excited. Anxiety can be severe but it often is triggered by stressors. A panic attack is always severe and usually comes out of the blue, without warning. Anxiety can follow us around all day, gradually building. Panic just hits you like a freight train.

    Lil Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can really relate to this, and I'm so sorry. I have at least 5 anxiety attacks every week, sometimes up to 3 a day. I hope you get better soon

    #11

    School. Home. Everywhere. I swear to GOD- At school I can see my friends, but they’re always talking about being pulling commit a no life and SH, and I don’t want them to do that, but there’s nothing I can ever do. My friend is being bullied, but I know the school won’t do anything about it, and I’m too f*****g scared to stand up for her myself, so I dunno. It’s always been like this, I’ve always been more on the distant side, not really understanding people, and peoples emotions, and not able to help with them either. So I joke! And I can’t really do anything else LOL- Anyway, at home, I got a homophobic family, a b***h sister I am burdened to share a room with, and nowhere to go. We live in a stupid world, I can’t even take a walk around the block without the fear of being raped, or kidnapped, or sold, etc. This whole world is a scam. Ever since the day you could talk, you’re put inside a glorified prison, to learn 92% useless knowledge, it only growing more harder, more intense, as you go. And the friends you’ve made, grow astray, different, and disloyal, turning on you, and leaving. Breaking your trust. Then you grow up and get a job, even more stressful than school- LIKE BRO- You spend your whole life working just to spend the last few years barely enjoying it >:(

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    #12

    I don't care what drivers think. Here, in Canada, pedestrians do have RIGHT OF WAY at all marked AND UNMARKED crosswalks, and all drivers MUST yield to pedestrians who obviously are waiting to be able to cross. It's in the driver's handbook. It's in the highway act laws. You can google it! So THERE Ms.donut-mouthed-head-shaking-road-raging-cranky-pants-lady in the silver car today, who was just angry she had to wait to turn into the Safeway parking lot when the coast was clear of cars passing from the other side of the road, like me and the truck beside me had to. Waaa waaa. She has to wait. Okay rant over.

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    #13

    I twisted my ankle yesterday and it feels like just another distortion. It's like the 7th time in my life this happened and the timing sucks a big one. I have a 5-month-old active rough collie puppy at home, had to take three weeks of sick days last year (CoVid and severe allergic reaction to an antibiotic) and my husband works overtime currently. To make this even more complicated, I have an upcoming tooth-surgery (the tooth has been hurting for weeks not) which probably has to be postponed due to the blood thinner I have to inject now. ...which I cannot just not take due to a high risk of thrombosis I inherited from my parents. I'm just mad at myself, even though it was an accident that could've happened to anyone (sleek ground, I slipped and twisted my ankle). Additionally my husband keeps teasing me because it happened *again* (3rd time in the last 5 years). I know, he doesn't want to be mean, but it just sucks. As if I enjoy walking on crutches and not being able to walk properly for at least a month ...

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    Lil Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm so sorry! That sounds horrible, I'm so sorry. I think you should tell your husband you don't like him teasing you when you need some comfort right now, maybe it could help.

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    #14

    If I hear "f*g" one more time, im gonna lose it, the word "F****t" in the English dictionary is and I quote: "A gay man" one, I am not a man, two, SO WHAT IF IM GAY, I DONT GIVE A S**T THAT YOUR STRAIGHT, SO WHY CALL ME SOMETHINGS FOR BEING GAY. also the fact that if I answer my parents when they say something its considered AN ATTITUDE.

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    Horst
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They call you a HOMOPHOBIC SLUR?! I hope you get out of there as soon as you can!

    Mickysixxx
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I stopped a lot of my students using this word once I told them the history of it

    Bi Frog
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I live in a tiny farm town in the middle of nowhere and I hear that word twice + a day. It's awful. I'm in the closet to my school and my parents and idk which would react worse. Its really nice to be supported here on BP though. :) At least you have BP too.

    BeepBeepBoopBoop
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    dude I hate people who use that word. I don't care if you're gay or not. It grinds my gears! I hear too many straight people calling each other that and it makes me so freaking MAD

    #15

    I’m not allowed to have a door for my room and I’m not allowed to close the door to the bathroom because my mom thinks I’m cutting myself; which I’m not! I hate how my mom assumes things about me and doesn’t listen to me instead. My mom is literally the reason for my many issues including starving myself. I’m trying to work on moving out to live with my dad instead but the process is taking so friggen long!

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    #16

    You’ve read my mind as I was just think “I need to rant about this.” I’m a goalkeeper on my soccer team and part of my job is to talk, but no one listens to me when I do talk and they tell me things like “we already have two coaches we don’t need another.” (This was after I told her where I wanted her on a corner against us.) But if I don’t talk they say “you’re the goalkeeper, you need to talk.” Not to mention the coaches are no help, I volunteered to play goal this year so we wouldn’t have to train a keeper from scratch, but I enjoy me field position, we now have another ‘08 keeper and one of the ‘09 players we just moved up plays keeper too. My coaches keep telling me, “oh you’ll be able to play field in the game,” but we all know they aren’t going to put me on the field if I don’t practice field and they don’t let me practice on the field. I LOVE my field position and I enjoy goal as well, but I’m starting to regret volunteering to play goalkeeper. Thank you for listening to my rant random people of the internet.

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    #17

    I have an eating disorder that is slowly becoming worse, and it’s getting to the point where I feel like I’m going to pass out, and how it started was when someone said I looked like I lost weight, and that comment has made me hate my body, I’m convinced that my eating disorder will kill me.

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    BeepBeepBoopBoop
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please get help if you already aren't. Eating disorders are mental disorders and it's so important to get help. I believe that you can do this. If you want a story about it I recommend Veronica Wright on YouTube. She's currently going through anorexia recovery and her journey is amazing

    #18

    I feel like I'm drowning honestly!! I have a hard time with my home life due to my parents divorce, and my relationship with my mother is especially difficult. NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY NOTHING WORKS. I feel like I'm seen as incompetent, and selfish. I'm trying and I cant anymore, and because of that I look like a jerk. I have a breaking point too and I dont feel like anyone understands that! I just need this to end, it hurts so much

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    #19

    I feel like my trauma is resurfacing and I absolutely hate it!

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    #20

    My mom thinks that my mental health issues is just because I’m a teenager and teenagers are moody, but she doesn’t know how bad it really is, and how much I want to unalive myself.

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    #21

    I HATE MYSELF. I recently I've had a awful horrible no good very bad week and I want to die. Im sorry that's dark but it's true and i have been seeing a therapist for 3 YEARS and Im so tired. I need someone here with me but I don't have anyone and Im lonely and depressed and sooooooooo anxious and I don't know what to do. I have all these fantasies in my head then I wake up and they aren't real and I want to scream. And then I will go downstairs and act like I'm great. I love my family and the few friends I have but there's something missing from my life and I don't know what it is. I feel like everyone but God hates me- on BP, irl, anywhere i go i feel like Im being judged and I knows thats selfish to think everyone is thinking about me, but i can't help it. I don't know what to do and i can't stop comparing myself to people about EVERYTHING. And I'm so angry at the world for being such an awful place. I wish I could die while staying alive and that doesn't make sense. I'm just a bomb of anxiety and I feel like the timer is ticking down. The worst part, I can't even have a panic attack if I wanted to. I have miraculously trained myself to bottle everything up so much that even when I'm alone I can barely do anything but feel the tension and rise, and just stay there. Does that make sense? I feel like everything i do or say sucks. I need serious help but my mom doesn't want me on medication this early in life, but i think i need it. And don't go shaming my mom, she doesn't understand how serious the problem is, because I"m scared to tell her. I feel so selfish and awful and ugly. I've got eating disorders and too much trauma, and everything just sucks. I am very very blessed to have a wonderful family, but they are not without their problems and don't really get me. Not to sound all "im so misunderstood" but i am super emotional which they aren't. all this had gone on for way to long and I ready to be done. I want to be done with life, are you telling me I've got like 70 more years of this?! Nonononono I need help, okay, and I'm alone. I have OCD that makes me feel so unsafe anywhere i go and I haven't felt real calm in so long.

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    Sunny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, I wont judge you, and God doesnt either:). If you need to talk reply to my comment, and I'll listen to you! I've been and sort of am in the same place so I get it, so if you want reach out to me!

    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Panic is different from anxiety attacks, just wanted to clarify. Plus, the other day I actually stood up, and just blacked out. not exaggerating- fell and hit my head on the table and chair. One of the most terrifying experiences of my life, 0/10 would not recommend. oh AND I'm starting to self-harm so can someone please help me with that? I'm seeing me therapist tomorow, this rant is just tiding me over I'm sorry

    beethebi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hey idk if you saw but i emailed you back

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    #22

    oh, another thing, I have CONSTANT anxiety attacks so if you need help concerning those I can help. (Also GO CHEIFS! We're going to the Superbowl!)

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    #23

    I feel like I'm drowning!! My relationship with my mother is terrible, and I'm trying so hard to fix it but everytime i try and open my heart again i feel like I'm being stabbed. I feel like people think I'm incompetent and a burden. I want to feel valued, not manipulated. Sometimes it feels like because I've always acted strong, no one understands that I have deep feelings. I have a breaking point too, and it feels like no one sees that

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    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oops didnt mean to double post sorry!!!

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